by A. E. Lucky
Chapter 4
The Kid, the Clone, and It--part 2
"How is that possible?!" the spider roared.
"How is what possible?" Superkid asked in puzzlement. "You act like you weren't expecting me."
Before the dastardly behemoth could answer, its victim came down yelling, distracting both it and our hero. The kid slammed into the web, pitching Superkid forward. The kid bounced up and smacked the diminutive vigilante in the mouth. Superkid fell backwards, clutching his lip and groaning in pain.
The obsessed fan rolled around the web as he tried to stand. The spider placed its leg on the kid's chest, holding him down face-up, and lowered its head with a curious frown.
"So there are two of you!" it exclaimed. "How did that happen?"
"You mean you're not involved in Doctor Red's sinister plot?" the obsessed fan--who you should know by now was actually the Superkid duplicate--asked.
Meanwhile, our fearless hero saw the behemoth's face extremely close to the obsessed fan--who he had no idea was actually a clone of him--and he yelled, "Hey, you leave that kid alone!" He quickly blew up his cape and then launched himself at the spider. The eight-legged monster looked up just in time for Superkid to barrel right into its face. With a confused roar, the evil arachnid clutched its face, pinning Superkid. Superkid quickly grabbed the bristly hairs on its head before the spider pulled him away.
"Ow! You little parasite!" the colossal arthropod snarled and hurled our diminutive hero to the web in a fit of rage. Our hero bounced harmlessly on the web and landed on his feet in a fighting pose. He grinned. "Probably should've put more thought into this before you went to all the trouble to build this web."
"Oh, but you haven't seen what I can do with this," countered the spider with a nasty grin. It grabbed two cables in its two forelegs and with a cry of "Trampoline!" flicked the web and sent the super kid into the air. But he didn't come back down, for he quickly blew up his cape and there he hovered just out of reach.
The spider stuck out its lower lip and moaned, "Aw, is someone not having a good time?" Then it grinned nastily. "Well guess what? You and I are going to have fun whether you like it or not!" It shot out a cable of web from its abdomen and caught the end of it with its foreleg. Then it made a strange guttural, gargling noise before spitting onto the end of the rope.
Superkid eyed the rope with a sick expression on his face. "You're kidding, right?"
The enormous arachnid didn't answer but smiled and began twirling its rope. Our hero muttered, "Oh nuts," and quickly blew more hot air into his cape-balloon. He slowly began to rise higher.
"I don't think so," chuckled the menacing monster and flung the spit-covered end of the rope at our unfortunate hero. The gobby spit squelched against Superkid's rear end and stuck there. Then that diabolical spider began reeling him in.
"Urgh! Spider spit!" Superkid groaned. "And it's like glue! That spider's pulling me in! I've got to break free!" So he blew more hot air into his balloon.
"Whew! Margaret! I got me a big 'un!" yelled the spider gleefully as it continued to reel our fearless vigilante in like a trout.
Superkid couldn't get away by rising. The colossal critter was just too strong! So instead he blew cool air into his balloon and then pulled the cord to release the air. He hoped that it would break him free, but the adhesive in the spider spit was too sticky and instead he swung down and plunged headfirst into the webbing, getting stuck in one of the holes.
Fantastic, Superkid thought dryly. Like a fly in a spider's web. He felt a tug on his behind--the spider was still trying to reel him in.
"Wow," said the giant eight-legged monster as it crawled up to him. "You've really landed yourself in a sticky situation... not that my web is actually sticky." It chuckled at its own joke. It deftly used its teeth to cut the web trapping our hero in place and then it picked him up, holding him tightly by his legs.
"Now... to make sure you won't cheat this time..." The spider quickly began wrapping the fearless kid up until he resembled a damsel in distress tied to a railroad track. The spider surveyed its work with a smile and it said, "There! Snug as a bug in a rug."
Superkid wriggled but it was just as the diabolical arachnid said. He was tied up neater than a square knot. He mumbled to himself, "Now this is a sticky situation."
The spider tossed him to the center of the web where he bounced helplessly. It grabbed the web with both forelimbs and it gave our unfortunate vigilante a wicked grin.
"We'll bounce on three, okay? One... two..."
The massive menace and the fearless kid had been so busy battling and insulting each other than they had both forgotten about the clone. And no, I didn't forget about the clone, too! He just wasn't doing anything interesting at the moment--well, not as interesting as what was going on between Superkid and the giant spider. Mostly it was rolling around and figuring out how to walk on a web while trying not to get squished by the spider. But now he was going to do something interesting--vital, actually. He was going to turn the tide of the battle.
When the villainous behemoth had tossed Superkid to the center of the web and had turned to face him, it had barely missed kicking the clone's head clean off while he was hopping along--which the clone had discovered was the best way to traverse the uncertain topography. But now its bulbous abdomen faced the clone and the clone had a plan to take down the eight-legged menace.
"We'll bounce on three, okay?" said the spider, grinning wickedly at its helpless prey trundled up in the center of the web. The clone behind the spider quickly bounced a few times for momentum while that evil arachnid counted, "One... two..."
The clone launched himself at the spider's leg and gave it a solid karate chop. The spider's "three" became a "threeyaaaak!" and it collapsed onto the web. The web bounced it back up and sent it rolling toward the center... where our hero was.
Uh-oh, he thought. He tried to roll away but the spider was rolling too quick and weighing down the web so that the only way to roll was toward the center. Fortunately, he managed to roll onto his face before the 800-pound monster rolled on top of him. Fortunate because although it wasn't very comfortable what with the cables cutting marks into his body, at least he was able to breathe.
The spider rocked its body--making it more miserable for the youthful vigilante underneath it--until it managed to grab its web and pull itself to its feet. It spotted the clone and it growled, "All right, time for you to join your twin here!"
The clone attempted to hop away but with a shake of the web from the spider he came tumbling toward the eight-legged creeper. The spider grabbed him and immediately began to wrap him up the way it had wrapped up the clone's original self.
Superkid struggled to sit up. He yelled, "Leave that kid alone! He's not part of this!"
"Not part of this?" the spider asked in disbelief as it finished tying the clone up. It tucked him under its arm and crawled to the hero. "He made himself a part of this when he chopped my leg...! Actually, I think it was when he crawled onto my web and started calling me names. He certainly has your gumption."
"He's just a kid!" Superkid cried. "Some crazy fan of mine who's in way over his head!"
"Crazy fan?" blurted the clone, too astonished for further words.
"Just let him go," Superkid continued. "He's no threat to you."
"No threat?!" the clone blurted again, this time now filled with all sorts of words that he wanted to throw at his counterpart. Picking the best ones, he cursed, "I'll show you--umph--who's a threat! You no good... dirty... rotten..."
Superkid stared at the kid in bemusement, wondering what his problem could be. You're probably wondering how our hero--an amazingly fearless kid with a quite sizable IQ--could be so naive not to recognize that the kid was actually his evil clone. The answer to that is quite simple, actually: the spider was holding the clone backwards, so all Superkid could see was the clone's feet.
The giant spider crawled to Superkid and picked him up in its other foreleg.
Now with both kids tucked under its legs, it crawled forward.
"You've got me," said Superkid, still considering the victim's safety even though the victim wasn't showing much appreciation. "Just let the kid go. He's just more hassle for you to deal with. Put him down and then you can play with me all you want. You won't have to keep your eye on two of us--wait, what are you doing?"
"You'll see," said the diabolical arachnid. And because you can't see, I'll tell you what the spider was up to. It had stopped and was now chewing a hole in the web that was big enough for the spider to crawl through. Once it was finished, it crawled under the web toward the center again, and there it paused.
"Stop number two," the evil arachnid announced. Then with an evil grin it added, "Two for the number of seconds it'll take for you to fall."
Superkid glanced at the feet of his obsessed fan and thought, Uh-oh. I hope I can get us out of this one.
The clone looked at the feet of his imposter and thought, Uh-oh. Looks like I won't be getting out of this one.
Yes, folks, it's a very tight spot for our hero and the clone here. Both were wrapped tightly in spider silk--the strongest material, relatively speaking, known to man--and facing a drop of thirty feet. It would take a miracle for the two of them to get out of this predicament alive... or something convenient at the last minute.
The diabolical spider dropped the two of them, sending them tumbling to the ground like juggling pins. They struggled to free themselves and find some way to save themselves but it was futile. The bonds were too tight and the ground was coming up too fast! Oh, I can't look!
But then that something convenient at the last minute appeared. Superkid shrugged the cables loose and he was free! But it wasn't so much convenient as it was clever. For you see, before the spider had wrapped him up, Superkid had blown up his cape enough so that when he deflated it, the silk cables would become loose! Now free, he twisted himself toward his obsessed fan and quickly grabbed him by the cables. Then he inflated his cape--after poking himself in the eye a few times with the hose at his shoulder--slowing their descent to a safe speed.
"Whew, that was close!" said Derrick. He and Darrin had positioned themselves to catch their heroic friend and the poor obsessed fan when they had seen what the spider was doing. But then he yelled in alarm as he pointed up, "Look out!"
Superkid looked up and then cried, "Wha..."
WHOMP! The enormous spider dropped on them. The force of the impact forced the spider to splay its legs, which forced its body onto the ground, squashing the two kids beneath it. Fortunately for Derrick, he had managed to run away in time... he could really run when he wanted to!
The spider grunted as it picked itself up, "Landed a bit harder than I expected." Then after giving itself a shake, the massive menace stepped aside to see how its victims fared.
Darrin and Derrick gasped. Then Derrick yelled, "Superkid! Superkid, get up!"
Superkid and the clone were both lying face-down... not moving. Superkid's balloon-cape bobbed as though trying to pick the hero up.
"Oh no," gasped the gargantuan arachnid. "Can it be? Can my arch-nemesis really be..." Then it threw its head to the sky and wailed, "Now how am I going to do the 'Tarzan'?"
Darrin couldn't believe it. Derrick couldn't believe it. The citizens of Poolington who had gathered to watch the face-off between the hero and the monster couldn't believe it. Even I couldn't believe it... because, of course, I know how the story goes. And it certainly doesn't go without Superkid! How else am I going to fill out the rest of the eight chapters of this edition? Relate the details of his funeral and burial?
Unfortunately, since I'm not directly involved in the story, everyone, including Derrick and Darrin, had to sweat it out and hold their breaths waiting for the hero to jump to his feet, yell, "Surprise!" and get back to whupping the silk stockings out of the giant spider.
And eventually he did... though not exactly the way I had described it. Rather he coughed then groaned and rolled onto his back.
"He's alive!" someone yelled and the crowd erupted into cheers.
"That was a close call," the giant spider chuckled to Superkid as the hero got shakily to his feet. "You were almost killed by my 'Spider Drop.'"
"Sure feels like I almost got killed," groaned Superkid, putting a hand on his back.
"But I've got one last move that I've got to show you." The spider lowered its head close to Superkid as though sharing a secret. "It's called the 'Tarzan.'"
"I'm guessing it has some--mph!" he cringed as he suddenly straightened his back with a pop, "--thing to do with swinging through the air."
"Good guess." The diabolical arachnid grinned. "It starts with you in the air and then I come swinging at you, like Tarzan, and send you crashing through a window."
"Through a window?" said Superkid dubiously.
"There's a pretty, little one right over there," the spider pointed out with its leg. And indeed it was a pretty, little, circular one right above the door. The spider would have to be a good shot to send our hero crashing through it.
"But I would have to be in the air..." said Superkid slowly.
The spider wagged a foreleg at Superkid like a reprimanding mother. "Oh, you think you have it figured out, but I assure you there are ways of getting you in the air."
"Oh I don't plan on cowering on the ground..." Superkid assured the diabolical arachnid as he surreptitiously reached for the hose at his shoulder. "In fact..." He suddenly whipped the hose into his mouth and blew hot air into his cape. His cape expanded and lifted him into the air.
The massive spider's eyes flew wide and it yelled, "Hold on a minute! I need to be up there first! You get back here while I--Hey!"
Superkid had puffed some cool air into his cape and pulled the cord to send him jetting away.
"No! You little... come back here!" The spider crawled after the aerodynamic kid, scattering a few of the citizens in its path. It attempted to climb a few buildings along the way but it only gripped them for a few seconds before dropping and crawling after its nemesis. Eventually it gave up trying to climb on top of the buildings and just charged after the youthful vigilante. And everyone else followed behind, not wanting to miss the action.
