by Debby Giusti
“What can I help you find?” the clerk asked.
“The boys wanted to look at straw hats.”
“A shipment came in last week. You will find them on the last aisle in the rear of the store.”
The bell over the door rang as another customer stepped inside. Ruthie recognized Sarah Deitweiler, a middle-aged woman with a pinched nose and unsmiling eyes. Sarah had spread rumors around town about Ben’s vice. Ruthie sighed at the memory of Sarah’s less-than-loving comments. Ruthie’s Aunt Mattie, her mother’s sister, had tried to ease Ruthie’s upset, yet even her aunt found Sarah to be a troublesome gossip.
Not wanting to give Mrs. Deitweiler more fuel for her wagging tongue, Ruthie steered the boys to the back of the shop.
Fannie greeted the newly arrived customer with much fanfare, as if to ensure Sarah Deitweiler’s shopping experience would be positive. Word of mouth was the best way to market, the Amish knew, but one disgruntled customer could sour a business’s reputation.
“Is that Ruthie Eicher?” the older woman said loud enough to be heard throughout the store.
“You know her?” the cheerful clerk asked.
“I don’t associate with her type. In fact, I find it strange that she would show her face in town after everything that happened with her husband.”
“Mrs. Deitweiler, a wife is not responsible for her husband’s actions,” the clerk said in Ruthie’s defense.
“You may think that, child, but as you age, you will learn the truth.” The older woman harrumphed. “I will leave now to do my grocery shopping and come back to purchase my dry goods another day.”
Ruthie glanced down at her sons. Simon’s face fell and Andrew’s brow furrowed. The boys had overheard the woman’s comment just as Ruthie had. She hated seeing their embarrassment.
Did they realize what it meant to be shunned? She had never mentioned their father’s tirade, when he had walked out of the Sunday service after calling the bishop and elders hypocrites. Simon had been old enough to remember the stares of those gathered to worship that day. Now he placed his hand in hers and squeezed as if offering support.
“What people say about us is not important, boys. What is important is what is in our hearts and that we live our lives as Gott would want. You do not need to hang your heads or be ashamed. You are fine boys, and I am proud of both of you.”
“But the woman did not want to shop when you were in the store,” Simon said, pointing out what they both knew to be true.
“We will not try to guess her reason for leaving. Instead, we will look at hats, which is the purpose for our visit.”
Although Ruthie tried to make light of what had happened, the boys had been deflated and their exuberance faltered.
Simon picked out a hat, then peered at the price tag. “My old hat is gut, Mamm. It keeps the sun from my eyes. I do not need a newer hat that will do the same thing.”
“But—” Andrew started to object as he reached for a hat in his size.
Simon took his hand. “Andrew, this is not what we need now. Come, we will go outside and wait for Noah while Mamm shops for herself.”
Touched by Simon’s maturity, and also saddened that he realized how far she had to stretch each dollar, she ushered them both toward the door. “I need nothing today,” she told the boys. “We will all wait for Noah outside.”
The clerk was busy unloading new merchandise and did not see them leave.
Once outside, they sat on a bench near the sidewalk and watched the cars and buggies pass. The sun had gone behind the clouds and the breeze was crisp. Their adventure was off to a less-than-encouraging start.
Seeing Noah exit the real-estate office and hurry toward them, she feared he would have news of the imminent sale of his property. If he announced he was leaving in the next day or two, she would return to the buggy and ask him to take them home.
Instead, Noah smiled as he neared. “Did you find hats?”
“We will wait for another day,” Simon answered for both boys.
Noah glanced at her, as if questioning what happened.
“We were not in the mood to shop.” She returned his money when the boys were not looking and hoped he would not press for more details.
She had thought the shame of the past would end with Ben’s death, but shame lived on even now. She could bear being rejected, but she did not want that for her children.
SEVEN
Noah could sense Ruthie’s tension, and he read pain in her eyes. Something had happened in the store that was more upsetting than the price of hats. He wondered if it had to do with small-town gossip.
The boys hung their heads as if finding great interest in the pavement. Simon’s shoulders slumped and his mouth drooped. Andrew rested his elbow on the arm of the bench and held his head in his hand. The sadness that covered both boys’ faces tugged at Noah’s heart. He wanted to wrap them in his embrace and right whatever wrong had happened.
This morning, they had all been so excited about the trip to town. Noah thought the day would be fun and an opportunity to be together. Evidently he had been wrong.
Last night, Ruthie had shared about Ben’s past. From his own youth, Noah knew how scathing gossip could be. Some people thrived on spreading hateful tales that harmed not only the people involved, but also innocent bystanders, such as the boys. Neither Andrew nor Simon were responsible for their father’s actions, yet they, too, suffered. Life could be unfair. Noah knew that all too well.
“What about your land?” Ruthie asked as if trying to focus on something other than their distasteful experience in the shop.
“The real-estate agent is out of town today. His receptionist said the papers aren’t ready. Prescott Construction is the name of the company wishing to buy the property. I thought I’d use the computer in the library to find information on the construction firm.”
“The post office is across the street from the library. I would like to get my mail.”
“We’ll stop there as well as the library.”
Simon’s eyes widened. “Could you show us how to use a computer?”
“If your mother says it’s all right.”
Ruthie pursed her lips. “Technology is not something the Amish embrace.”
“Please, Mamm.” Simon grabbed her hand, his earlier upset seemingly forgotten.
Following his older brother’s lead, Andrew tugged at her other arm. “The library has books, Mamm. You want us to read more.”
She nodded. “Books are good. I am not sure about computers.”
“You could go to the post office while the boys and I go to the library,” Noah suggested. “It won’t take long.”
“Can you use your phone to search for the information?” she asked.
“I’ll have more success using a computer. Plus, Simon and Andrew will enjoy seeing how they work.”
Ruthie tilted her head as if mulling over her decision. “You will be careful?”
She was no doubt worried about the man on the mountain. “I’ll be as cautious with them as you would be. You can trust me, Ruthie.”
She stared at him for a long moment, and he wondered if she was weighing that very point. He had destroyed her trust ten years ago, so he understood her hesitation. The boys sat quietly, seemingly holding their breaths as they awaited her response.
Finally, she nodded. “The boys can stay with you while I get the mail.”
Noah almost sighed with relief, but he didn’t want the boys to realize what a huge concession their mamm had made. Ruthie had guarded her children for so long. He imagined she had placed herself between them and her husband, always the protective mother never wanting anything to hurt her boys.
He had asked Ruthie to trust him. Taking the boys to the library wouldn’t seem like anything major to most people, but Noah was grateful that she had placed her sons in his
care, even if just for a short time.
“Come on, guys, let’s escort your mother to the post office, then we’ll head to the library.”
The boys skipped ahead as Noah and Ruthie followed behind at a more leisurely pace. Ruthie’s shoulders were tense, and she flicked her gaze up and down the street.
She was worried about the man from the mountain. Perhaps she was also worried about whom she would see in town. From what she had told him last night, Ruthie and the boys had remained isolated on the farm and away from townspeople who had witnessed her husband’s tirade at that Sunday service prior to his shunning. Undoubtedly, she still carried the scars from her humiliation.
In a way, Noah could relate. As a youth, he and Seth had been ashamed of their father. They heard the whispers behind their backs and saw fingers point when they came to town. Noah had left home to rid himself of the shame. After all these years, he realized he had allowed it to take hold of him, and no matter how far he traveled, he couldn’t remove himself from the memories and the pain until he embraced his past, accepted his father for who he was and then worked to forgive him for the dysfunction he had caused in Noah and Seth’s lives.
Regrettably, as much as Noah wanted to forgive his dad, he couldn’t. The pain was still too real. Then he realized the truth about Ruthie.
For so long, he had felt stung by her rejection, yet being with her again made him realize he was the one at fault. He had left Ruthie. She couldn’t forgive him because the pain of being abandoned was still so real to her. Plus, Noah had not only abandoned her, but also their child. Some wrongs could never be righted. Ruthie could never forgive him just as he could never forgive his father or himself.
EIGHT
By the time they arrived at the post office, Ruthie was feeling less unsettled. The few people they passed on the street had smiled and nodded in greeting. Mrs. Deitweiler was nowhere to be seen, and there was no sign of any tall man wearing black and sporting tattoos on his arm. The boys had regained their youthful enthusiasm, and even the sun peered through the overcast sky. Her earlier concern eased, and she smiled as Noah and the boys left her at the post office and headed to the library across the street.
She waved a farewell, although Simon and Andrew were focused on Noah, probably talking about computers and questioning how they operated. At least Noah glanced back and waved. Ruthie appreciated the attention he gave to her sons, but she remained all too aware of the man who wanted to do them harm.
Stepping into the post office, she was relieved to find only two people ahead of her in line. She waited patiently and approached the postmaster’s window after the other customers had been helped.
Mr. Hardy was a kindly man who had managed the local post office for as long as she could remember. His smile was warm and welcoming. “Ruth Plank Eicher. It has been a long time. I wondered if you would be coming to town.”
“It has taken me a while to get here.”
“You’ve got a pile of mail that I’ve been saving. Did you bring a satchel?”
She glanced down at her small handbag. “I have only my purse.”
“I’ll get a big plastic bag from the back.” He paused to stare into her eyes. “I’m sorry about the accident, Ruthie. You and the boys doing okay?”
“Yah, danki, Mr. Hardy. The farm is a challenge, but the boys are a big help.”
“Your datt was a friend. I miss him. He was fortunate to have you as a daughter. You are a good woman.”
Her cheeks burned. She nodded her thanks and waited quietly as he found a bag and filled it with her mail.
“Do you still want me to hold your mail here until you come to town again? Or we could set up delivery to your home.”
“Can I let you know the next time I stop in?”
“Of course.”
Ruthie’s heart was heavy as she left the post office. Glancing into the bag, she wondered what all the official-looking envelopes meant. She had buried herself on the farm for the last two months and had allowed the bills to mount. Now she had more with which to deal. With so little ready cash, she had wanted to provide the daily needs for her children instead of paying off bills, many of which Ben had left unpaid.
Focused on her own financial situation, she failed to survey the surrounding area and suddenly heard footsteps sounding behind her. She stopped at the intersection and looked back. Her heart lurched at the sight of a tall man dressed in black. He stared at her through narrow eyes. The man on the mountain had covered his face with a stocking, so his features had been unrecognizable. Could this be the same man who had attacked her?
The light changed and she hurried across the street. She glanced back. The man started jogging toward her.
The library was just ahead, but she did not want the man anywhere near her boys. She spied a flower shop on the far side of the library and hoped she could find safety there. Surely the man would not do her harm when other people were around.
Increasing her pace, she hurried past the library and slipped into the shop.
The clerk looked up from arranging a bouquet of roses. “May I help you?”
“I—I just wanted to look at some of your potted plants.”
Glancing out the window, Ruthie saw the man hurry past the storefront.
“Let me show you what I have,” the clerk insisted. She motioned Ruthie to the rear of the store and pointed out a number of potted plants, each more beautiful than the last. The woman rambled on about how to care for the plants to keep them healthy and blooming.
Grateful though Ruthie was for having a place to hole up, she was eager to join Noah and her boys at the library and was relieved when a phone rang. The clerk excused herself and hurried to the far end of the counter to take the call.
Ruthie slipped outside and glanced along the sidewalk, seeing only a woman pushing a baby stroller. Letting out a sigh of relief that the man was gone, she hurried to the library and walked across the large stone portico. As she opened the door and stepped inside, someone bumped into her.
She glanced up. Her heart raced. The man in black. He must have backtracked to the library when the clerk showed her the potted plants.
The man’s face twisted in recognition. “I thought I had lost you.”
Her boys. Had he done anything to Simon and Andrew?
“What are you doing here?” she demanded.
“You dropped this.”
She looked down at the letter in his outstretched hand.
“You need to be careful.” He pointed to the bag she held close to her chest. “You wouldn’t want to lose any more of your mail.”
She took the letter, and before she could react, he was gone. She watched him run across the street and disappear into a wooded area not far from the post office.
Glancing down at the envelope, her breath hitched. The letter bore a stamp and had been mailed to her rural address. The script was the same as the writing on the notes she had received at home that demanded she leave the area, and all three missives had been written in the same shade of green ink.
Was he merely returning a letter she had dropped? Or was the man today the same person who had attacked her on the mountain?
* * *
Noah glanced at his watch, concerned about what was taking Ruthie so long. He should have waited for her at the post office until she got her mail. If the boys hadn’t been so excited about visiting the library, he might have been more cautious.
He was ready to head outside to check on Ruthie’s whereabouts, when she raced into the computer area, eyes wide and face flushed.
From her expression, he knew something had happened, and it wasn’t good. “Stay here, boys. I want to talk to your mother.”
Noah hurried to her side. “Are you all right?”
“A man dressed in black came after me.”
“The same man from the mountain?”
&
nbsp; “I am not sure. He gave me this envelope. He said I had dropped it.” She was talking fast, the words spilling one after another out of her mouth.
“Calm down, Ruthie, and tell me you are all right.”
She pulled in a breath and nodded. “He did nothing to harm me except make my heart nearly stop beating.” She explained about him following her across the street.
“I dashed into a flower shop until he passed by. Then when I entered the library, he was there. Somehow he had doubled back. Perhaps when I was with the clerk in the rear of the store.”
She held up the envelope. “He said I had dropped this letter.”
“Did you see tattoos on his arm?”
“He wore a long-sleeve shirt.” She shook her head. “Perhaps I am being foolish, but I feared he would grab me.”
“Do you want to read the letter now?”
“Not now. I do not want the boys to know.”
Noah understood. Ruthie always put her boys first. He admired her for that.
“Come, the boys are excited about the computer. We will focus on them now and deal with the man later. I called the sheriff’s office. We can talk to one of the deputies this afternoon.”
“I am not sure, Noah. What will the deputy say?”
“He’ll say you need protection.”
“My father never wanted to deal with the authorities. Neither did Ben.”
“But you are wiser than your father and your husband. Besides—” he glanced at where the boys sat in front of the computer “—you need to think of Simon and Andrew.”
She nodded. “You are right. My safety is not as important as theirs.”
“All of you are important, Ruthie. The man needs to be stopped.”
He needed to be stopped now, before she was hurt again or he injured the boys. If anything happened to any of them, Noah wouldn’t be able to forgive himself. He had made so many mistakes in the past, he couldn’t make any more now that Ruthie and Simon and Andrew had come into his life.
