by Liz Lovelock
Parker’s pinched face softens. “I’m sorry, Pais. I’ve never been so angry as I was coming face-to-face with William, and when I walked in and saw you lying on Dane, that was the final straw.”
I hold my hand up. “Stop right there. Dane is a great guy, and if I was seeing him, then you wouldn’t get a say.” Parker’s mouth opens, and I quickly continue. “And as for you being angry, I get it. I’m a mixed bag of emotions as well. Can I come in?”
He moves aside, and I make my way to his bed and sit.
“How are you feeling?” He sits beside me.
“I’m okay. I guess a little overwhelmed because I don’t know this man. Do you remember him?”
Parker has never brought our father up to me. When I think about it, he was nearly two when he left. Mom fell pregnant with me pretty quickly after she had Parker.
Parker shakes his head, then it drops, and he watches his fidgeting fingers. “No, I don’t. That’s probably a good thing.”
“How is Mom?” This must be so much for her to take on.
“Oh, she’s not doing too well. Dad, William—whatever you want to call him—he contacted her out of the blue. He told her that he was setting up a new firm in town and that he’d like to be a part of our lives.” I’m sure if Parker could blow smoke out his ears, he would. Even talking about William brings back that pinched, angry look to his face.
“Why did he think we’d be okay with it? I mean, we’re adults now, and if we don’t want to see him, we don’t have to. Do we?”
“You’re right.”
“What are you going to do?” I ask hesitantly.
Parker shrugs, shaking his head. “I’m too angry to think about wanting to have anything to do with him. He left us. He left Mom. I can’t let that go so easily. Mom always told me that if I wanted to know him, she would be open. I never had the desire to meet the man and still don’t.”
I chew my bottom lip. “I completely understand where you’re coming from. There is a small part of me that wants to see what he is like. Yes, I don’t like what he did to Mom and us, but my emotions are so up in the air at the moment. I think I’ll sleep on it and talk to Mom.”
He nods and then stands. “I get it.”
Silence fills the room. We’re both so overwhelmed by the situation. It would be so easy to say something that left one or both of us upset.
“Are you staying here tonight?”
I give him a small smile. “Thanks, but I think I should go home. I’m sure Mom needs me—well, us—right now. We both have what we’re feeling to deal with, but Mom’s past has suddenly rushed in and pretty much slapped her in the face. She not only has to sort herself out in this situation, but she’s got us to worry about too.”
Parker runs his hand over his face, releasing a puff of air. “You’re so right. I will be the first to admit that I was only thinking of myself tonight. Perhaps we should get together for dinner with her tomorrow and discuss it all.”
“Sounds like a great idea. And this time, we won’t have the big elephant, William, in the room—just our family.” My lips pull up on one side as I stand. I reach for Parker and tug him into a hug. “We need to support each other, not growl and be angry.”
He chuckles. “Agreed.”
“Where are you off to?”
I stop when I hit the bottom of the stairs and turn to Mom. She stands in the doorway. Her hair is tied in a messy bun, and she’s wearing sweatpants and a baggy, plain white shirt. This is Mom’s casual look.
“Oh, I have a date,” I say. I have to stick with the date I’ve promised Jase. Can’t say I’m too keen to be going. I have to tell him I’m not interested in any more dates.
She raises her eyebrows. “Is it with Dane?”
My eyes drop to the floor. “No, that’s still not happening. Parker saw us a little too close the other night, and he nearly hit him. And since then, Dane has kept his distance.”
When I got home that night, I’d spoken to Mom. She was so confused by our dad turning up.
“I’m sorry, honey. I’m sure there will come a time when Parker will let this issue go. Perhaps I should talk to him.”
“No, it’s okay. He’ll get suspicious about why you’re doing it, and that will lead him to me. I’m not ready for that argument, especially if he plans to take it out on Dane. I’ll leave it all be right now.” I shrug. I wish we could put aside everything and just give it a go for real.
“Paislee, you should go for what you want and not settle for second best.”
My chest swells. I have the best mother. She’s always so supportive and offers the advice I need to hear. “Thanks, Mom. So, what are you doing tonight?”
She releases a puff of air. “I’ve got William coming over. He wants to talk.”
I don’t miss her cold tone. I have no doubt she’s bitter toward him, but throughout my entire life, she’s never said a mean word about him. I’ve heard other parents fill their kids’ heads with so much hate for the person who left. I can totally understand their reasoning—I’d probably be the same. But Mom’s never done that, and she had every right to.
“Why are you even bothering?” I purse my lips.
“Because he wants to know about you and Parker. I think he wants to be given a chance to build a relationship with you both.”
“What if he leaves again because he realizes we’re not what he wants?”
Mom takes a step toward me. “Paislee, I get it. I really do. I’m trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. A second chance probably wouldn’t hurt.”
“With you?” I almost yell.
Mom laughs. “Nope. There’s no way I would get into a relationship with William again. I want him to know his kids, and I’d like them to not make it difficult.” Her lips form a thin line.
Knock, knock, knock…
I turn to the door. I know it’s not Jase. I am meeting him at the college. Mom moves past me and twists the doorknob. He’s here again. William or Dad, whatever. I’m not even sure what I want to call him yet.
“Hey.” Mom’s soft voice greets him. I stand there, chewing my lip.
“Hey, sorry I’m late. I got held up at the office.” His deep voice vibrates through me. This man is one half of the reason I’m alive. At least I have him to thank for that.
“That’s okay. Come in.”
William steps into my safe zone, my home. His dark eyes zero in on me. He’s wearing a deep-blue suit.
“Hello again.” He attempts a smile. It looks strained. I guess I must have a good resting bitch face.
“Hi,” I say. My heart is jumping around in my chest.
“Will you be staying?” He holds up a bag of takeaway. I catch the symbol and it’s from my favorite Chinese takeaway place. Damn, he’s good. Mom must have given him a heads up that I was here.
I turn to her. “You stalled me on purpose, didn’t you?”
She holds her arms out. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about.” There it is—that tone she uses when she has done something and is trying to act like she hasn’t.
“Oh, you’re good.”
She smirks. “I’ve learned a lot from my kids.” She leans over and gives me a kiss on the cheek.
William smiles at the exchange. Wow, he totally is an older version of Parker. I’d always thought my brother looked like Mom, but having William in front of me, I can’t unsee it now. Parker is him all over, even his height.
“Ah… did I miss something?” William, Dad—hell, what do I call him?—turns and shuts the door behind him.
“No, William. Mom is being sneaky as usual,” I say.
“You can call me Dad, if you like.” He tilts his head.
I think on his response for a split second before saying, “I’ll use that when you earn the title.” As the words leave my mouth, I inwardly cringe. I’ve never been so blunt to an adult before. I’m surprised Mom hasn’t pulled me up on it just now.
I keep eye contact with him. A small smile touches his lips.
“I understand. And you’re correct. I do need to earn that title before you use it. Does this mean you’ll give me a chance?”
“Maybe.” I grin. Mom silently watches the exchange.
“Perhaps we could catch up sometime? I’d like to get to know you.”
I suck in a deep breath and nod. “Sure. Sorry, but I have to go now. I’m going to be late for the date I don’t want to go on.” This response gifts me two puzzled looks, one from Mom and one from William. “Don’t worry. He’s a nice guy,” I assure them. I rush out the door like my butt is on fire. I’m super late now.
Mom silently watches the exchange. There’s no doubt she’ll be giving herself props for softening me up and bringing us together right about now. But she did make some good points.
“I’m so sorry I’m late.” I rush up and grab Jase by the arm. He stands at the entrance to the skating rink.
“Oh, hey. That’s okay.”
I turn to see who he’s standing with. It’s some chick I don’t know. A pain throbs in my heart. It shouldn’t, because I did come here to tell him I couldn’t see him anymore, but him standing here chatting with another girl while waiting for me makes me uneasy.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.” I release his arm and take a step back.
“Paislee.” I face the familiar voice. Elsie, Addison, and the guys walk toward us. There’s one person who is missing: Dane.
“Hey, guys,” I greet them.
“We’ve been waiting for you.” Addison comes to stand beside me.
“Yeah, sorry. William showed up just as I was about to leave.” I take note of Parker. His face tightens at the mention of our father. “Calm your farm, big brother,” I say gently. And he does. I don’t need another repeat of the other night.
“Hey, Jase,” Addison greets. I twist and he is standing directly behind me. All hellos are exchanged, and we make our way inside.
After we get our skates and sit to put them on, my nerves take over. My legs have become like jelly. I turn to Jase who is patiently waiting. “I cannot skate.” I chew my bottom lip.
He chuckles. “That’s okay. I can help.” He winks playfully. I need to tell him where I stand.
“Also, one other thing. Jase, you’re a great guy, but I’m…”
“It’s okay, Paislee. I know. I saw how you were with Dane at the party the other night.”
My jaw drops to the ground with a thud. He saw? Well, who else saw then? “I’m really sorry. I didn’t want to lead you on. I’m having fun. How could you tell?” I tug at my laces.
Jase’s hand lands on my shoulder. “I’m okay, really. I shouldn’t have asked you to come tonight. Truth is, I enjoy your company. You’re honest, and I like that. I admire you telling me before things move any further forward.” He pauses. For a big burly football player, he’s a complete softy. Then he says, “I noticed the closeness and also the tension between you both. I think it was just before you went and started getting drunk.”
I bump his shoulder and grin. “You really are a great guy, and I’m sorry about getting drunk. It’s not me.”
He shrugs, raising his eyebrows. “Ah, you know I already know that. I’m just not the right guy for anyone at the moment.”
My stomach twists. If there’s one way to tug on a girl’s heartstrings, it’s that line right there.
“Don’t say that. I’m sure the right girl is just around the corner.” I stand, already wobbling. “Oh, goodness, this is going to end badly. I can see it now—bruised butt, possible broken wrist or leg. Can you secure me in bubble wrap?”
Jase erupts with laughter.
“I’m serious,” I cry.
“Here, let me help.” He takes my hands and leads me toward the rink. I grip his hands tightly.
“Don’t let me fall, because you’ll be coming down with me if I do.” There are a number of fellow students here. I’m sure to embarrass myself. Just what I need. I’ve lost track of Elsie and Addison. At least they can skate. Jase tries to let go of my hand. “Wait, what are you doing?” Panic seizes my limbs, and I drop to the ground, landing squarely on my butt. I suck in a sharp breath. “Dammit.”
Jase loses his crap laughing. “Oh, dear. I was trying to put my hands on your waist to guide you. Come on. Up you get.” He holds his hands out to me and lifts.
I’m sure the wheels on these things are out to cause me pain. They’re the definition of pain in the ass.
Two hours pass and I’m sitting on the side of the rink with an ice pack on my wrist. This was a bad idea. A terrible idea. I had a feeling this was how it would end.
“I think it’s just a sprain.” Jase lifts my hand and assesses it for the second time.
“Well, that’s good.” I laugh. He gently puts it down and settles in beside me.
“You really don’t have to sit with me. You can go find yourself a girl out there.” I point to all the people in the rink and on the chairs around it. “I’m not holding you back. Hell, I even noticed a couple giving me the evil eye.”
He smirks. “The only ones giving the evil eye are those I’ve turned away. I’m not interested in what they want.”
Oh, and he’s a gentleman. Ladies, we have a winner here.
“I’m sure there are a lot of good ones out there as well.”
Jase’s arms come behind me. He pulls me against him. “I’m here with you. If you think I’m going to abandon you, you need to think again. Where are the others?”
I scan the rink and spot Elsie, Aiden, Parker, and Addison showing off their skills. I have the urge to throw a ball at them. I lift my good hand and point to them. My phone pings. I remove it from my pocket.
I die a little when I open it. It’s from that stupid dating app. I’m going to shut it down—once I figure out how to. Opening it, there’s a message from some random guy named Rick.
Rick: Hey, beautiful. I love your picture.
A shiver runs down my spine.
“Who’s that?” Jase leans over my shoulder.
“Some creep. Elsie signed me up for this dating app, and I’ve been getting a few messages like this. There have also been a few who show their bits before striking up conversation. Do you know how to cancel this stuff?”
Jase pulls back and cocks an eyebrow. “Do I look like the type that would go on there?”
I glance between him and my phone. “I don’t know. Maybe?” I laugh and I can’t stop. Tears fill my eyes.
“Perhaps girls on these things wouldn’t be as bad as the ones I meet in real life?” He rubs his chin and purses his lips.
I’m still laughing. “You’re killing me here. I reckon girls would be worse on these things. I mean, I could be completely wrong.” A sense of lightness falls between us, and I know we’re going to be good friends. He’s someone I can rely on to have my back.
Jase takes my phone from me. I let him scroll through the app and my profile. “Have you seen you have ten messages sitting in the inbox of this thing?”
I lean over and have a look. “No, I didn’t. I honestly don’t want to be a part of it. I’m going to shut it down.”
“What if we go through this list and you choose one for you to go on a date with?”
“Pfft, are you kidding me?”
Shaking his head. “Here, look at this guy. He seems nice. There’s no hey, beautiful or anything.”
I read the message.
Callan: Hey, how are you?
“That’s just a simple greeting. What if he turns into a creeper and starts sending those kinds of pictures?”
Jase chuckles. “Then we delete him and get rid of the app. Fair?”
A slight twist in my stomach makes me second-guess the plan. I glance between the message shining on my phone and Jase. “Fine.” I give in.
“Here, write something back.” He hands my phone to me. I click on Callan’s profile. He looks nice. But what if this is a pretend picture and he is really an older guy who forces girls into trafficking? My head is going places I don’t wa
nt it to.
Callan has short, neat, dark hair—unlike Dane’s. I can’t make out the color of his eyes. He seems like a nice guy. He enjoys sports, running, the beach—all things I like.
“What should I write?” I turn to Jase.
“Say hello, silly.” He shakes his head. “Do you want something to eat?”
I nod. “Sure, I could eat. I’ll have whatever you get.” He walks off.
Jase is going to find himself a girl who will take his breath away, and he’ll treat her so well.
Paislee: Hi, Callan. I’m good, thanks. How are you?
Even as I type, it feels wrong. All kinds of wrong.
“What ya doin’?” Aiden plants himself in the chair beside me.
“Not feeling great about this dating-app business your girlfriend signed me up to.” I can’t help the eye roll.
He smiles, shaking his head. “Yeah, she told me about that. You realize you don’t have to do it. Just deactivate your account and end it all.”
“Well, I can’t now. I’ve agreed to contact this one guy. He looks nice enough, but the whole thing makes me a little uneasy.”
Aiden turns his whole body to face me. “If you start talking to this guy, and he comes across as full on, or you’re not feeling it, then tell him you’re not interested and delete the app.” He shrugs. “Simple.”
“Yeah, so simple for you. It’s not your name and details you’re throwing out there,” I snap.
He stands, raising his hand. “Don’t do it then.” He walks away, chuckling. My phone alerts me to another message.
Callan: I’m good. So, tell me about yourself. I’m nineteen, play sports for college, and that’s pretty much my life.
Well, he seems genuine enough. I hit reply.
Paislee: I’m eighteen, enjoy sports as well, and I’m at college also.
Callan: Wow, that’s awesome. I’d love to meet you in person sometime, if possible. I noticed your hometown isn’t far from mine. I’d be happy to drive and come see you, if you’re okay with it?
