Mangled Hearts

by Felicia Tatum

  The sound of my heartbeat pounded in my ears, and my stomach felt queasy. Cade sat in front of me, his rich blue eyes wide and in shock. Stupidly, I’d held my hand out to shake it, like I did with all my clients. But this wasn’t any client…it was Cade-freaking-Kelling. He didn’t move, making my awkwardness even worse. Then he spoke.

  “Francesca.”

  One word from his full, amazing lips and my heart shattered. A flood of emotions overtook me, and I had to sit down before I fell. Wobbly legs made their way to the seat furthest from him, and I sat down heavily. My hands shook so badly I hid them under the table. I tried to regain my control before I spoke.

  “Mr. Kelling, I’m working your case for the associates of J & B Law Firm. This is my first official case, but I assure you I will do everything in my power to ensure you only get community service,” I rattled off, keeping my tone professional and stern.

  He gaped at me, then shook his head. “Why are you talking to me like that? Francesca,” he said, extending his hand out to grip mine.

  The instant his skin touched mine, electricity flowed through me like a river. My breath caught and eyes filled with tears. I tore my gaze from his, determined to not let him see me cry over him yet again. I slid my hand from underneath his, and with renewed strength looked at him. “Cade…I know we have a history, but I’m not letting that get in the way of this, ok? I’ve been with the firm for three years and this is my chance to prove I can be a good partner, just like the rest of them…”

  He interrupted, holding his hand up to stop my words. “Three years and you’re just now getting a case? What the hell? You deserve better than that, Francesca. You are the most brilliant person I’ve ever met. You should already be running your own firm.” His nostrils flared in anger, his face reddened.

  I saw his fists clench and knew I had to stop his tirade before it got worse. “It’s ok, Cade. It’s difficult to get started. Just let me get what I need from you so I can get to the office and get started,” I explained, my eyes pleading with his to cooperate.

  He appeared conflicted, his eyes flickering from mine to my lips. Groaning inwardly, I stopped my mind from drifting to memories of his soft lips enclosing on mine. The way he made butterflies dance with a single peck, or the way his hands felt as he caressed my face. I snapped my head back down to my papers, shuffling them to look like I was actually concentrating on his case and not the way he made me feel.

  “I’ll do whatever you need, Francesca. Anything for you.”

  My heart hammered faster, and I worked through the long list of questions I’d prepared for today. He ordered breakfast, eating as I wrote down his answers. Being this close to him, in a natural environment, brought back too many memories. Particularly of our first breakfast date together.

  9 years prior-November

  School assemblies were known for being boring. The day before our Thanksgiving break, we had a two hour assembly that was required for an attendance grade. I dreaded it. They always dimmed the lights, so I couldn’t even read. As I slammed my locker shut, I was greeted with Cade’s grinning face. My heart fluttered and I returned his smile.

  “Heya, wanna sit together?” he asked, sliding into step with me.

  I nodded, saying, “Sure.” We walked the hall together. I tried my best to not notice the stares, and the whispers from the girls that wanted him. I didn’t know why he was so dead-set on being my friend, but I knew people didn’t like it. I was constantly interrogated on whether we were dating or not. I always said not…though I secretly longed for it to be yes.

  We sat near the back. My palms sweated knowing in mere seconds I would be sitting in the back of a dark auditorium with the one and only Cade Kelling. I fidgeted with my purse, moving it from my lap to my feet and then to my lap again. I saw his sidelong glances and I knew he knew I was nervous.

  So much for playing it cool.

  The lights dimmed, and he leaned down, whispering, “Hey, wanna cut? We already sat through roll call. If we run for it, we can get out the side door. All the teachers are in here…they’ll never know.”

  My heart rate sped up, “Skip school, Cade?” I was shocked. I’d never even considered skipping school. And I never would…not on my own. But the thought of being alone with Cade in his car…going somewhere with him without all the watchful eyes…it was tempting.

  “It’ll be ok, I’ll make sure you don’t get caught,” he assured me, nodding his head and sneaking down the aisle.

  I hesitated, then I saw his eager face, and his bright blue eyes that seemed to be glowing and peering into my soul. I quietly stood, careful to not make any noise, and met him right outside the room. We made a mad dash for the nearest side door, and he held it open so I could escape first. I ran to the nearest tree, hiding behind it as I waited for him. He strutted up, walking casually like nothing was out of the ordinary, and snickered at my hiding.

  “Really, Francesca?” he chuckled. “You’ve never ditched before?”

  I shook my head, frantically scanning the area for any authoritative figures. I heard him laughing and glared. “Don’t. This was your idea. Now lead the way to your car so I can breathe again,” I hissed.

  He laughed again, holding his hand out to mine. I placed mine in it, staring as he locked our fingers together. The storm it created in my stomach was like a hurricane, and I prayed I wouldn’t barf on him. He hurried me down the parking lot, ushering me in his vehicle. It smelled like Big Red cinnamon gum. I buckled, nervously fidgeting as he took me to a waffle diner in the next town. The car ride was almost too much for my fast beating heart. I wondered if he could hear it. Being so close to him…smelling his gum…his woodsy, male scent that turned me on more than I wanted to admit…it drove me crazy. I kept stealing glances at him as he drove. His face was pure perfection, looking like that of a model that graced a billboard. His dark hair swooped in all the right places, looking like he didn’t really fix it, but it was obvious he did. His chin was hard and chiseled his nose long and defined. His lips…his lips were my favorite. He was forever in a pouty position, his bottom lip puffy and looking oh-so-delectable. When he smiled, they showed off his brilliant set of white teeth.

  “Francesca?” he said, humor evident in his gaze.

  “Yeah?” I said, almost breathlessly.

  He raised his brows, his lips turning in a smirk, “We’re here…” he said, gesturing widely with his hands.

  “Oh,” I chuckled, “right…sorry. I was just thinking…about how much trouble I’ll be in if my parents find out,” I lied.

  One brow raised higher, and he laughed loudly. “Alright, don’t worry about it. Just tell them the bad boy you are friends with made you do it.”

  “You aren’t a bad boy,” I stated.

  “Yes I am,” he said softly, his fingers reaching to caress my cheek, “You really shouldn’t even talk to me. I’m gonna end up corrupting you.”

  Shocked, I stared at him. “Don’t talk about yourself that way, Cade.”

  His fingers lingered a few more seconds, then he rushed out to open my door. We walked inside, sitting at a booth in the corner nearest the windows. My fingers slipped as I picked up the menu, and his arm shot out to catch it. He smiled at me knowingly, his fingers lingering against mine.

  “Do I make you nervous?” he questioned.

  “Of course not. Why would you make me nervous, Cade?”

  “That’s what I’m wondering,” he said, his lips giving me a wicked grin.

  My stomach turned over, and I breathed deeply. I managed to order and get through the meal without making a complete fool of myself, though I was quite sure he knew I had a crush on him. I couldn’t help but watch as he ate, the careful way he cut his food…the odd way he folded his napkin in squares. I wanted to know everything about him, everything that made him tick. And I wanted to know if he felt the same way about me.

  He drove to my house, though I didn’t te
ll him where I lived. I looked at him questioningly. “Cade? How do you know where I live?”

  He blushed. Cade Kelling actually blushed. “I looked it up.”

  “Why?”

  “Oh, dammit, Francesca, no. I’m not a stalker or anything. Please don’t think that…I just…want to know you is all,” he admitted, running his long fingers through his silky hair. I longed to run my own through it.

  “You do?” I asked, not stopping the ridiculous grin from taking over my face.

  He nodded, reaching for my leg like he had the first time we talked. He squeezed my knee, winking at me. My heart may have stopped. He hopped out, once again opening my door, and pulled me in for a tight hug. My body molded into his perfectly, and I leaned in, placing my head on his shoulder. I sighed when he released me, missing his touch the moment it was gone.

  “Thanks, Cade.”

  “Anytime, Francesca. Anything for you.”

  Present Day

  I sipped the water in front of me, desperate for something to make it easier to speak. His eyes bore into mine, making my mind swivel in confusion. I blinked several times, willing my mouth to work. “Thank you, Cade. I’ll be in touch,” I stated, standing and gathering my things.

  He jumped up, his chair falling behind him. He didn’t even look back as he moved toward me. Desperation poured off of him as he stumbled over his words. “Francesca, please…I’ve missed you. You are the best person to ever come in my life and I’m so sorry for everything I ever did to you. Can we talk again…not so…formally?”

  A tear slid down my cheek. Sniffling, I slung my bag the rest of the way over my shoulder. “Cade…I’ll have to think about it. I’ll call you tomorrow when I have a court date.” My eyes looked him over, devouring the sexiness he exuded. They stopped on his face, taking in every inch of him. I could see the sorrow…the regret…and the longing. I wiped the salty wetness from my face and gave him one last look.

  “Tomorrow,” he said, caressing my cheek in the ever familiar way.

  I turned and left before I lost myself in him again. I couldn’t allow it. Not this time.