Seamus crosses his arms, “Who is gonna leave tonight with you?”
“Dmitri, You and Chaos will come with me tonight. The rest of you will come tomorrow, after all the girls are settled. I’ve spoken to Darius, seeing as he’s got a couple guys in Louisville right now. They’re keeping an eye on him ‘til we get there.”
“Do we have a plan yet?” Pain asks. I’m glad he asked it because I was just about to. All of us are itching for some answers.
“I have a plan, but we all know too well that it’ll go to shit the second we get there. It always does. Happened the last time when y’all went to New York. Max wasn’t even fuckin’ there.” Reed shakes his head, still in disbelief about it. We were all pissed when it came to that. We thought we had Max, but it turned out we didn’t have him at all. The only thing we had at that point in time was a headache.
“Just remember the important shit. Capture this fucker alive, ‘cause he’s got hell to pay.” Kyle speaks up, getting a round of applause to follow. The lot of us are pissed, angrier than we’ve ever been. This isn’t a random dude who fucked with us. Max is someone who claimed to be a Skull for years . . . when he was a snake in the grass.
“As my brother has said, we want him alive. Just remember to be smart when we get there, guys. We’ve been through a lot of rough times, but this battle is unlike anything we’ve ever been through before. We’ve underestimated him for long enough, and we’re done making the same mistake. We need to think like the scum he is, and that is how we’ll finally get him.”
There’s no doubt about it that tensions are high. As I look around the room, I can see the outrage on everyone’s faces. Every single brother here knows how much getting Max means to us. We’ve all suffered enough. Murder. Beatings. Rapes. Framing for murder. Accomplice of murder. The list of what Max is done just keeps extending to something worse than the last crime. It’s not just the fact it’s a physical crime, though. He’s committing horrid things against people he called brothers. The men he fought, cried and suffered through the worst of times with. Everything about this is personal.
“Don’t worry, Prez. We won’t kill him. That’s for you.” Trick says.
“I’ll try not to let my anger get the best of me.” Kyle tells his brother.
Between Kyle and Reed, they have the most to hate Max for. He pulled a lot of shit between the two of them. Caused a lot of pain. The type of pain that no one will ever be able to recover from. Even after the man is dead and six feet under, I don’t know if anyone will ever be the same. I hope we can all put this behind us, but the damage is far too great to just wake up one day and feel the weight fall off our shoulders.
“Those of you who are leaving tonight. You’d better kiss your kid’s and ol’lady’s goodnight. Help them get some shit packed. We’re leaving in 30 minutes.”
Reed walks away from the head of the table and leaves the room, signaling us all that it’s okay for us to leave too. I head out to find Ksenia and take her home. I’m going to be holding her tight tonight before I leave tomorrow.
26
“Love is never wasted, for it’s value does not rest upon reciprocity.”
-C.S. Lewis
Ksenia
Overall the funeral services were beautiful, and so was the feast that we all ate alongside one another. In Russia, we do not grieve like Americans. It is quite different. I think that is because death is viewed so differently there. We’re used to people dying, because of the way our lives are. In Russia, you are one of three things. In the lowest class, ultimately being put in the worst situations. You’re in the highest class, getting the best of everything or you’re somewhere in the middle.
The lowest rank on the totem pole generally dies more than the rest. Living in a life where drugs are prevalent and you’re most likely part of the sex trade. In the middle class, you’re lucky if you do somewhat okay with whatever you bring home and aren’t married to an abusive man . . . but I’ve seen so much of it. I don’t think that will ever change, and I pray it does. “What’s the matter?” Enzo asks me, pulling me from my daze.
I move my head in his direction, “Sorry. I was just thinking about how in Russia we view death differently.”
“What do you mean by that?” He asks, and I realize that I’ve never quite elaborated this.
“While we grieve, we aren’t vocal about it. Now that they are laid to rest, we will grieve in private and move on with our lives. It is a dishonor to them to live in the past, and we would only be doing that if we continue to think of the way they died. We can only think of the life they lived. I have seen here . . . that the grieving time is much longer. We don’t do that, or maybe we just don’t do it because we’ve all come from similar circumstances.”
Enzo stands up from the chair he’s sitting in and approaches me, pulling me into a hug. “You are unlike any other woman. You have the biggest heart I’ve ever seen, Ksenia, and I pray that no one ever makes you cold.”
I glance up to him as I speak. “No, they would have to try very hard. I am not as weak as most think.” Enzo smiles as I finish my sentence.
“No, you are not. So, I have been thinking. What shall we name our son? We haven’t talked about it.”
Memories rush over me as I think about one of the night’s we were together. He and I were talking about what we would do if things were different, if we had different lives and were married to people with normal jobs. He made a joke about how he would name his son Kane, and I have loved the name since the first time he said it. “Kane seems like a good fit.” I say, smirking a bit as I gauge his reaction.
“Kane, huh?” He’s unable to hold back his smile. I can tell he’s already on board with my suggestion.
“Yes, I think it would be a good, strong name for our son.”
“I think you’re just sucking up to me.” Enzo chuckles, yanking me closer to his chest. I bury my face in the crook of his neck and smile.
“I’m not. I really mean it. I like the name and I think you like it too, otherwise you would have never mentioned it to me. I promise, I’m not sucking up to you, and I’m not fucking with you.”
He takes my face in his hands and steps back, “I would love it if we named our son Kane.” I pucker out my lips for Enzo to kiss me and he does, in a sweet, romantic way. A knock comes to the door and I pull away, walking over to it as he grumbles.
Upon opening it, I see Zoya. “Would you mind helping us figure out where we can stay?”
I nod, “Of course. We have a few rooms in the basement that are empty. The boys should have set the cots up down there. I’ll show you, okay?” I look back to Enzo and he waves his hand for me to go.
“Thank you.” Zoya says, eyes darting across the décor. I’m sure that she’s never been in a place like this. When all of us were together, we never really talked much about the types of situations that we came from.
I lead her down the stairwell and make a sharp left, opening a door. “This is the basement. I promise it isn’t creepy, though.”
She offers me a small smile and follows me as I place my hand on the railing and head down. “It looks like you have a nice life here.” Her words are soft spoken, but I can still hear her.
“I do, but I am hoping to be back at the club when all of this is said and done.”
“Really?” She sounds shocked at my admission.
I turn my head towards her and nod as we reach the bottom of the stairs. “Yes, even though I am living here with my brother and sister, this does not feel like my home. I have only ever felt that in one place – at the club. I miss being there, and when Max is dealt with, I plan on coming back.”
“But there will always be some sort of danger.” Her words are getting quieter each time she speaks. Part of me wonders if she’s afraid to state her true feelings. We all came from different walks of life. Depending on who our previous Masters were . . . we were never able to speak, or even utter a word regarding our feelings.
I put my hand on her f
orearm and give it a good squeeze. “You are no longer a slave, Zoya. You can tell me how you feel. As for the danger, I think that will always be a factor. But I won’t allow my fear to decide my fate. I am and will always be safer with the Skulls versus on my own. They have done nothing but protect us.”
“The girls wouldn’t have died if we weren’t here.”
“You’re right.” I confess, adding my own spin on it. “They would have died years ago at the hands of vile men. Do not forget where we came from Zoya. If we were never brought here, we would all be dead. I have no doubt about that.”
She seems shocked at what I’ve said, but she can’t really be surprised. She and everyone else knows it’s true, and to assume that they’ll all be safe if they leave the club – well, it’s just wrong. “I am so confused. So many want to leave to explore . . . and get away from danger.”
“It is dangerous wherever we go.” I argue, looking at her with concern. I have accepted that most will probably leave, but I do not want them to. I fear for when they make their choice and go. I am scared for the things in life that might happen to them without our protection. Most of all, I am scared because we have been with one another for so long. The Russian Dolls are an extension of my family.
Zoya looks past me and I’m sure she can see the girls. They chatter lowly in the background. “Well, I have found where I should be. Thank you for leading the way.” No matter what, I just hope that these girls will make the right decision.
27
Revenge is the act of passion; vengeance is the act of justice.
-Unknown
Enzo
As I sit here in this dimly lit room, I can’t help but think about how things are going to change over the next coming days. There are only two options here – good or bad, but regardless, everything will change. I’m hoping that it isn’t the latter. I’m praying with every ounce of leeway I have with the big man upstairs that we’ll be able to get this son of a bitch and finally put him where he deserves – in the ground. But, I need to be prepared for the worst case scenario as well. I’ve already been shot a couple of times, barely making it out of the last one. I glance down at my leg, tapping it on the ground endlessly. Hard to believe I was even shot. I bet a stranger on the street would never be able to tell, but the scar that marks my body tells another story.
I’ve only been thinking about one possibility – success, but there is also another feasible option – failure.
If something goes wrong, one of us could die. Hell, I could die. I’m not prepared for that fate, but I need to have a discussion with Ksenia about it. Because if that were to happen, I need to make sure that she and my son are properly taken care of. That will only happen if she knows everything, and I give her explicit instructions.
I just got off the phone with my trust lawyer. I haven’t ever touched a dime of it because I’ve never needed to. This was always going to be something for my future, that would be used for retirement, or for my family. Now that I have a family, things needed to be adjusted. Ksenia Petrov and Kane Moretti have been added as beneficiaries to my trust to prepare for the worst case scenario.
I can’t die, though. I promised Ksenia that we would get her daughter back – and we will. I do not go back on my word. It is something my mother taught me growing up. Our word means everything.
Gianni and I were able to speak in private a bit earlier and I have one of his most valuable diggers looking into something else. He’s looking into birth records in Italy, and tracking Larisa. It’s a long shot, but I’m hoping there is some sort of breadcrumb that Sergei left behind. No one is that good. There is always something that is overlooked, and with any luck, it’ll lead us straight to the girl. Gianni knows that this digger cannot speak about any of this. All he knows is that we’re looking for a child. He knows nothing of the birth mother or any other pertinent information. My brother told me that he might’ve led the digger on to believe a little white lie, that Sergei may be next on the list of active hits my family has open.
I see Ksenia’s figure coming in the doorway. She shuts the door behind her as she enters the room, locking it behind her. “I know they might need help . . . but I need a break.” She sigh’s as she finishes speaking.
“I bet you do. We’ve had a busy last few days.”
She nods, walking over towards me she takes a seat in the chair beside me. The two of us look at the fireplace. It’s not lit, but it is gorgeous. “You have that right. I’m exhausted. All I want to do is eat everything in sight and then sleep.” She pauses for a moment before continuing. “Why do you look so somber? Did something happen?”
“No, not at all. I just think we should discuss something, in case what we’re trying to achieve doesn’t go as planned.” No part of discussing this is going to be easy.
“Doesn’t go as planned?” She repeats, searching my face for answers. She can try to find them there, but she won’t.
I take in a deep breath, trying to find the courage to talk to her about this. I don’t want to talk about it, but it’s something we can’t avoid. Even if it wasn’t today, we’d be having this discussion sometime soon. There is always risk in going on any run, but this is far riskier than most things we do. Then again, we all know the monster that we’re dealing with. “I need you to know what to do in case anything was to ever happen to me. Whether it’s tomorrow, or another run for the club. You know there is always a risk that I might not come home. We always have some element of danger.” Her face shifts as I bring up the word danger.
“It’s funny you say that. I just said the same to Zoya a few minutes ago . . . that there is risk everywhere.”
“Yes, and if I were to die. I need you to know what to do.” I go into detail and tell her everything I’ve just done to ensure she and Kane will get my money. I know her family does well, and that Mariana would help her if she asked for it, but Ksenia never would. She’s not the type to ask for financial help. After I’ve given her every detail, she stands up from her chair and comes over to me, taking a seat on my lap. Her lips press against my jawbone and I feel the wetness of tears spilling from her lips. As much as she hates accepting this, she knows that I’m only preparing her for the worst case scenario.
I run my hand along the side of her face, soothing her. “We’ll probably be fine, but if we aren’t, at least you know what to do.”
“You’d better be fine. Finally, together after fooling around for this long. If anything was going to kill you, it would’ve been Dmitri.”
We both laugh at what she’s said. I pull her closer to me, adjusting my position so I can press my lips down onto hers. I kiss her sweetly, showing her just how much I care. Part of me wants to tell this girl that I love her, that I’ve loved her since I knew her, but I’m sure she’d call bullshit. I’m not lyin’ though. The girl stole part of my heart from the day my eyes landed on her.
I don’t think I’ve ever truly been in love, or whatever this is until now. I’ve been infatuated with women, but never in the way like I am with Ksenia. Although, she makes me view things in an entirely different light. I’d do anything for her, even kill Sergei Kolosov and if it comes down to it – I will kill him.
I will do anything to make sure she is as happy as she can be.
Her lips flutter over mine showing me just how much desire she has been holding back. The two of us may have been together over the last few days, but we haven’t reconnected with one another in the way we should have. I need to nestle myself deep inside her, to feel her small frame withering around me.
Between us both, our kisses grow fiercer. The two of us showing one another how much we’ve missed this. We always had to hide everything before, and now we’re out in the open – our relationship no longer a secret. It feels riveting to be free like this. Ksenia hasn’t been a slave in a long time, but she was enslaved by the secret we were keeping. One that I’m glad is done and over with.
Her hands travel to my cut, sliding it slowly off me. It sits on th
e back of the chair while her hands now move to my torso, raking her long nails over my abs as she yanks the shirt over my head, tossing it next to us. I grab her shirt at the part where it forms into a ‘v’ and pull both of my hands away, ripping it into shreds. I think she’s going to kill me at first, but I’m met with eager, hungry eyes.
I’m quick to snake my hands around her back and remove her bra, revealing her bountiful, perky tits. Pregnancy has only made her hotter. I swear to fuckin’ God. Every time I look at her I have to hold myself back from being a complete savage.
I pull her nipple into my mouth, as I shove a hand down her pants, finding her clit. I rotate my tongue and fingers in unison, slowly teasing her. It’s been quite a while since we’ve last had sex, and I’ve bet she’s been thinking about this moment for a very long time, as have I.
She shimmies her legs, hooking her thumbs under her pants and yanks them down. The two of us look like two overly horned up teenagers, and honestly, there’s no doubt we both feel that way. “It’s been too long, way too long.” She confesses, pulling back from me, yanking her pants over her feet. “I need you inside me, more than I’ve needed anything in my entire fucking life.”
I raise my eyebrow, removing my own pants. “You want this cock that bad, huh?”
“No, I want my cock this bad.” She points to her pussy, “I’m soaking wet for you and I need to come. For the love of God, please fuck me like you never have before. Do not be gentle with me, Lorenzo. I promise you, I won’t break.”
I take in a sharp breath, knowing what she’s asking of me. “I will not be too rough with you. I’m not going to hurt him.” I’m firm in my decision and there’s no changing my mind. I will not be choking her in any way, tightening my hand around her throat as I come inside of her. That will all have to wait until after he’s born.
Retribution: Skulls Renegade MC Book #10 Page 11
