“Yes, sweetheart. We’re gonna have a home, a real home.”
She sighs through the phone. “I just don’t like that you want to do this without me. I want to be there.”
“Ksenia, I won’t be able to focus on finding Larisa if I’m too worried about whatever it is that you’re doing. It’s better that you stay back.”
“I don’t like it. I want to be there . . . but I understand.” She knows what I’m saying to her only comes from a good place in my heart. If anything were to happen to her, everything else would go out the window. “When will you be home?”
I glance at the clock on the dashboard and respond. “About an hour. We’re heading to the clubhouse to handle some business. I’ll drive back home after with Slash and Dmitri. Okay?”
“Alright. Be safe, and know my heart is with you.”
“I will, sweetie. See you soon.” I hang up the phone and place it on the seat beside me. This nightmare will all be over soon, and I can’t wait until we can put it behind us. It’s been long awaited, and finally we’ll be able to breathe a little easier.
36
If I could tell you one thing, my message would be this, the world would be a lonely place, if you did not exist.
-E.H.
Enzo
We get back to the clubhouse and Reed has us get Max out of the back of the freezer truck and take him into the basement. It’s located under the clubhouse and isn’t anything special. It’s where Reed keeps all of the extra shit, but when we went down to take him down there . . . we saw that it’s no longer a storage room.
Instead, it’s been transformed into some sort of cell. There’s a small cage in the corner where it looks like we’d somehow shove a body in, with a locking device on the outside. There’s a sink, and giant metal hooks come down from the ceiling. On every part of the wall, there is a long piece of wood with various torture devices and tools. They vary from electric cattle prods, whips, chains, paddles, even some devices that look like they’ve come straight out of the medieval times.
Reed told us to shove him in the cage and lock it, so Trick and I did that, then went back upstairs. He told us that his plan is to keep Max here for however long he deems fit, torturing him over and over every single day until he dies. It shows me that he meant what he said before. He made a promise to Max, a promise stating that he’d own his life, making him pay for everything he’s done. Reed wasn’t fucking around.
Trick looked at the dungeon, prison, or whatever you want to call it and I noticed how he viewed Reed in a different light, but it’s not in a bad way. In fact, I think we all respect Reed a bit more now. None of us have ever shown him disrespect, but it’s nice to know that he will go to the ends of the Earth to make sure that everyone who has crossed us suffers in the ways they should.
It would be too kind to give Max the mercy of dying, and all of us agree. I’ve said the term deserves far too much. It makes me think about what a man does and doesn’t deserve. We base that decision on the actions that were made. The things that warrant such a decision – to deserve mercy or eternal hell.
Hell is the only option that Max will ever get, and it won’t be something that happens once. His hell will happen endlessly, on a rotating cycle, and when he gets to the point where he wants to die – he’ll still breathe. He will beg for death, and never will any of us grant him mercy.
Reed has discussed the plans he has with Max, not only the torture, but to use him as a lesson for any prospect who ever decides to set foot in our club. Cross us, and this is what we will do to you. After everything, we won’t ever allow another to betray us again. And if we’re lucky, no one will ever attempt to. Hopefully, we’ll scare the ever-loving shit out of them after we show them Max. Think of it as: Skulls Renegade Scared Straight.
Ksenia met us at the club with the Russian Dolls who have opted to stay a couple of hours ago. Reed made it a point to tell us that none of the women would be allowed back until we dealt with Max. That meant securing him and shocking him with a cattle prod, for a good while. Oh, but we dowsed him with a bucket of water prior. That made the sounds that slipped from his mouth a bit more pleasant.
The Russian Dolls who have chosen to stay are only a few. Most of them want to leave and Reed respects their decision. He’s even asked them where they plan on going and is trying to find houses for them so they can continue to stay together. Ksenia is upset, but understands that they need to go out and explore. The dolls who have chosen to stay are Nadia, Alena, Zoya, Samara, Alla, Sascha, Yevka and Matrina. Everyone else has chosen to leave the home they have called the Skulls for these past few years.
I think the shock of the bombing has pushed them into a new phase of their life. One where they need to go out and explore the world without the safety of the Skulls behind them. Ksenia told me that she hopes they find whatever it is they’re looking for. But I feel the pain behind her words. She’s worried for them, and I wouldn’t expect anything less than that coming from her.
Reed had construction workers at Bubba’s a few days after the attack, but told us as of this morning that the entire bar is being torn down. He said it’s a time for change, and with that, it’ll be completely re-designed. It’s time for our club to go into a new era, and so we shall. Reed is having the restaurant being converted into two areas. One is family friendly, and the other side is not. The kitchen will serve both areas, but there will be a wall going through the middle. It won’t be as tiny as it was anymore, though. The bar is expanding by almost two thousand square feet. He stated that this will be a good opportunity for our kids to work when they’re old enough. Plus, the Dolls who have chosen to stay needed to know what they’d be doing.
Reed also made an executive decision to leave it up to the Dolls if they wanted the porn production to continue. Polina had been starring in most of the videos, and since her death it hasn’t been a priority. Out of respect, he asked if it was something that they’d want to continue and a few of them volunteered to do so. It’s good money, and given Angel’s eye – it’ll only increase in value as we continue. I’ve noticed over the past few years that Reed is really trying to make sure we bring in money by doing legitimate business. He doesn’t want us to transport drugs or guns, or worse, sell them. He’s offered for us to provide security for a few prominent families around here, so that’s something that brings in a hefty load of cash. But, we’ve been offered an even better position by the Romanian Clans.
Mariana and Ion Petran have offered us, The Skulls Renegade, a contracted job for protection. Not only protection, but to be a hired hand whenever they need it. These people are some of the most powerful individuals in the world, so to say no isn’t a decision that we should’ve made – and we didn’t. Reed accepted their offer, but had stipulations in doing so. He made it a point to tell them that we wouldn’t be murdering anyone for them, and would only help in certain situations if things were explained to us.
Fucker brought up my family, and stated how we aren’t mercenaries like the Arcane. When he said that, an eerie feeling washed over my entire body. I still can’t explain it, but I just have the feeling like something has happened. Carla told me what Stefano had planned for her when I last saw her, so this makes me think that Mariana has something big planned up her sleeve. I know about her blood, which means I know about her power. Given the fact she’s just hired our entire MC . . . does that mean she wants the Russian throne?
Every decision that I’ve seen her make over the last few weeks is contradicting everything Ksenia has told me. She says her younger sister doesn’t want it. But is that true? From the way I’m looking at it. The Queen of the Clans is preparing to take over the world as we know it.
Why else would she hire an MC, and be arranging for some sort of deal with Stefano?
37
She fell for the idea for him and the ideas were dangerous things to love.
-Atticus
Enzo
It’s been three days since we’ve been back. I thou
ght that I’d feel happy with what we’ve accomplished. We finally have Max. My thought process was that everything would suddenly start feeling better, but it doesn’t. I still have this unbearable anger that festers inside of me. I believe it’s from the buildup of everything that has happened over the years. I wanted this anger to dissipate, for it to go away so it wouldn’t still be intensifying. I wish I was wrong. You ever had so much shit happen to you and the people you love, that you stay in a constant state of rage? That is how I feel.
It’s worse than anger.
This form of animosity is something that I’ve never experienced before.
“You don’t look happy.” Ksenia states, bringing me out of my head. I bring my head up and look over to her. She’s just walked in our bedroom door. I find that I come to our bedroom to think, which really means to sit in this outrage. It’s the only place where I feel like I can allow myself to be angry. I just have to keep faking it in front of everyone else.
I try my hardest to fake being strong for her, and for the most part, I think she doesn’t have a clue. “I’m fine, sweetie.”
Her eyes search over me. “I don’t think you are. You seem . . . different.”
“I’m not. Just tired.” I reply quickly, sure that she won’t worry if I tell her I’m alright. It’s worked thus far and will continue to.
“I hate it when you lie to me. You’ve been different since the moment you came home, and I don’t understand why. I’ve let you have your time to yourself, but it’s been long enough. Now I want answers.”
Ksenia has been with us for quite a while, for a few years now. But, she hasn’t experienced what all of us have. Reed’s ex-fiancé was murdered. Fuck, we found her with a rope wrapped around her neck. She was hung by the enemy. We thought all those years ago that Dwayne was behind all of it – but he wasn’t. The real monster behind it all was Max.
Then there was Trick. His sister and kid nephews were slaughtered in cold blood. All because Trick had taken the fall for Reed. He took the blame and ended up getting incarcerated because Trick understood that taking the fall for his Prez was the best thing he could have done. For the future of our club, it was a small sacrifice to pay.
If that wasn’t enough, Kyle was framed for murdering some random girl in Las Vegas. We knew he’d never murder a girl, but we didn’t have proof. Max was the one who planted the body in Kyle’s hotel room – who made it look like Kyle was the bad one. We only found that out when Darius helped us secure a video recording from the gas station owner across the street from the hotel. We saw the video. It almost looked like Max was smiling at the camera. If only we could have seen that video before things got worse, but they did.
After that, Jenna was attacked in the state park while out on a run. She was beaten so badly that it took her weeks to recover. She had cuts covering her arms and legs, some of which have scarred to this day. Now, we find out that Max was the one behind it. Just another act of horror, that was added to the already full list.
At Butch and Bellamy’s wedding, Michelle was beaten to a bloody pulp and raped. All because he became jealous that they were reconnecting after all of those years apart. Max wasn’t dating Michelle anymore, so he had no right to be angry. Then again, after speaking to Michelle one night, years ago, I know a lot more about their relationship than she remembers. She confessed to me that he made her get an abortion. He didn’t give her a choice. He forced it on her. At the time, I thought she was just drunk and got overly emotional. Now . . . I know the truth.
I just wish I had done something. I feel that all of this could have been avoided. In fact, I know that it could have. If only I had done something, if I had put the pieces together. All or at least most of this could have been avoided.
“I’m fine.” I grumble out at Ksenia, standing up. “Will you please just stop badgering me with questions?”
She looks shocked at the way I’m talking to her. Normally, I’d care . . . but I need space. I’m having a hard time processing this shit and being around her will just make it worse. I’ll snap at her, or yell, or take out all of my anger on the one person I care about more than anything in this life. I don’t want to unleash my fury on her, but I need space. “What has gotten into you?”
“I just . . . need some space.” I walk past her and stop in the doorway, almost expecting her to say something – she doesn’t. Instead, it’s me. I turn to face her, looking at her long straight white hair flowing to halfway down her back. “Ksenia, I love you. I just . . .” I shake my head, “I need to figure out this shit in my head right now.”
She starts to open her mouth, but I continue down the hallway and head down the stairs. Opening the front door, I walk out to my bike and mount it. Within a minute, I head down the driveway.
I don’t know where my destination is. I just know I can’t be here. The guilt is suffocating me.
38
We are nothing but space dust, trying to find our way back to the stars.
-Unknown
Ksenia
I don’t know what just happened, or why he just shut down and left. This is a side of Enzo that I’ve never seen before, and it’s something that I don’t ever want to see again. I asked him what was wrong because I know something is bothering him. And the fact he’s not talking to me about it only makes me worry even more.
He left to go deal with Max, and came back an entirely different person. I just don’t understand why. What happened? I ponder standing here in our bedroom overthinking the issue, but I decide there’s only one person who will answer my questions, and he’s downstairs.
I go downstairs and walk into the lounge area that has the bar. Gianni is wearing a fitted black suit. He’s facing the bar, pouring some sort of concoction no doubt. “What happened out there?” I ask, my tone filled with outrage. I’m furious, needing to know why Enzo is acting like this.
Ever since he’s been home, he makes small appearances but goes back to our room. It’s almost like he’s depressed, but not quite. I don’t know how to explain all of it, but he’s nothing like himself.
Gianni turns, with a drink in hand. “What’re you talking about?”
“Lorenzo. He doesn’t seem okay. He’s so emotional . . . and he keeps distancing himself from me. It’s only been since he’s been back, and I don’t know what’s happened. So, can you elaborate?”
“Nothing in particular. Why? How’s he acting?”
I go on to tell Gianni how Lorenzo is becoming closed off. He’s being very short when we talk, sometimes getting moody. He’s barely eating and just wants to be in our room by himself.
“Weird.” Is all I get from Gianni.
I narrow my eyes at him, “Weird? That’s all you’re going to say?”
“Sure. It’s weird. I don’t know what you expect me to do about it.” I waddle my pregnant ass over to him and take the drink out of his hand, throwing it in his face.
“I expect you to help me figure out what’s going on. Since you’re the family brat, maybe you don’t have a damn clue. Now get on that fucking phone of yours and call your father or brother. I don’t know what’s wrong with Lorenzo, but I refuse to let him fall down the rabbit hole.”
Gianni smirks, looking me up and down. “Shit, if my brother didn’t already have you. I would claim your ass. You’re a spitfire of a bitch!” He cackles, grabbing his phone off the bar. “Here, call Sal. He and Enzo are somewhat close.”
I rip the phone out of Gianni’s hands and go into his contacts. I think I’m calling the right ‘Sal’, but it’s not listed that way in Gianni’s phone. Instead, ‘Sal the Snail’ is listed. Finger’s crossed it’s the right guy.
“Hello?” A grumble filled tone answers. “What do you want Gianni?” After listening for a moment, I recognize his voice.
“Hi Salvatore. It’s Ksenia.”
“Hi. What can I do for you?”
“Something’s wrong with Enzo. He’s getting all distant and I don’t know what to do. I was hoping that yo
u could shed some light on it or help me. He’s never been like this with me before.”
“I spoke with him yesterday. He did seem a little off. I wrote it off as no more than stress from his trip.”
“That could be, but something doesn’t feel right.” I say, needing him to see how serious this is. I’m not just some paranoid girlfriend. Something is wrong. I just need someone else to see that.
Nothing is said for about a minute. I start to think that Salvatore and I have been disconnected, but he speaks. “You’re right. I don’t know too much about what they all went through, but I know that other things happened. Or at least, that Max fellow admitted to other things. It seemed they didn’t know everything he’d done. I don’t know what else he said, but that could be taking a toll on Enzo.”
“What do you mean?”
Salvatore sighs, “Enzo has always been somewhat emotional. He may act like he isn’t, but he doesn’t fool anybody. He’s the type of man who wants to change the world. Always has been and always will be. I’m just wondering if the fact he can’t change what happened is wearing him down. If there’s even any possibility that he could’ve prevented any of this, he’s probably feeling guilty.”
“I don’t understand. Why would he feel guilty about something like this?”
“Because he’s a better man than most, Ksenia. He doesn’t want this world to be so awful. It’s why he doesn’t work for the family. He doesn’t think that we should have the type of business we do. It’s inevitable, though. The world that Enzo wants isn’t the one we live in, so we must adapt to our surroundings. You just have to give him time, Ksenia. It doesn’t take more than a couple of days. He just has to realize what he already knows deep down – none of this is any of his fault.”
I can’t comprehend what Salvatore is saying to me, but I know that he understands his brother more than I do. Salvatore understands the tiny quirks that make Lorenzo who he is, and this is one of them. “So . . . I will just wait for him?”
Retribution: Skulls Renegade MC Book #10 Page 15
