by Matt Zachary
“How about now?” Stuart asked, free of any stuttering.
“Now?” Billy was taken back. He wasn’t expecting to have to jump right into it. But, as he considered he was suddenly free and the sooner he started the better grade he could possibly get on the final, he agreed. “Do you have a car?” Billy asked, but Stuart told him that he took the bus to school. Both boys glanced to the front of the school where the buses were just in time to see the last one pull out. “Well, it looks like you missed your bus because of me...so why don’t you come home with me and we can study and I’ll take you home after dinner?”
“Are you s-sure?” Stuart asked. He wasn’t sure he should trust Billy. Though they were in the same class, they had never spoken to one another and Stuart’s interactions with other jocks had not been very good ones. Normally, they involved him either getting his head shoved in a flushing toilet or getting his underpants wedged into the crack of his ass. Still, Billy had been nice enough to help pick up Stuart’s books.
“Sure...just call your folks and let them know you’ll be home after dinner.”
“It’s alright. I-I d-d-don’t have to call,” Stuart explained, but the expression on his face told Billy there was something he wasn’t saying. He figured maybe Stuart just didn’t want to admit he didn’t have a cell phone. Billy thought about offering his tutor his cell phone to use, but didn’t want to embarrass his further, so he just let it drop.
The trip back to Billy’s house was a quiet one. Neither boy really spoke. Billy had tried to break the silence a few times, but each time he did, he was rewarded with just a one word answer. So, finally, he just tuned the radio to one of his favorite songs and just enjoyed the rest of the drive home in his black jeep. It wasn’t the flashiest car, but Billy enjoyed its versatility and the ability to let the wind envelop him as he drove.
As he rounded the corner to the gates that opened to his palatial home, Stuart’s mouth dropped open. “T-This this, is your h-h-home?” he asked Billy. If he wasn’t intimidated before, he certainly was now.
Billy wasn’t sure why Stuart was so amazed. The house was large and grand, but all of the kids that went to St. Vincent’s Academy had homes similar in style and size. “Yeah, why?”
“I-it’s so-so-so b-b-big!” Stuart was amazed. He felt like he had entered into another world. He knew everyone at his school was rich, but he had never been invited to their homes before. Unknown to Billy, Stuart was not from a wealthy, influential family. He lived in a one bedroom apartment with his step-dad. The only way he was even able to attend St. Vincent’s Academy was through a scholarship program the school offered for children of its employees. He knew he shouldn’t be ashamed, but he had a hard enough time fitting in at the school without everyone knowing he was the step-son of the school’s janitor.
Chapter 4
Stuart knew he shouldn’t gawk at the elaborate surroundings as he and Billy entered Billy’s house because it was likely to lead to questions that he wasn’t prepared to answer. He couldn’t help it though. Just walking through the giant wrought iron door was like entering a make believe land. Everything around Stuart was new and unlike anything he had ever experienced. Sure, he had seen such lavishness on television and in movies, but it was completely different in real life.
Billy led the way to his room, completely unaware of Stuart’s reaction. It wasn’t until the two boys entered Billy’s room that he noticed Stuart’s eyes bulging in astonishment. “What?” Billy asked, a bit shocked. From Stuart’s expression he thought that maybe there was a masked intruder in the room.
“Th-this is your room?” Stuart asked. The room had to have been bigger than his entire apartment...not that that was very big at all, considering it was a one bedroom apartment.
“Sure,” Billy answered non-chalantly. “Pretty typical, I guess. Why? What’s your like?” he asked Stuart.
Realizing that he was blowing it, Stuart reeled in his amazement. “Pretty much like this,” he lied. “Should we get started?” he asked before Billy had a chance to ask him any other questions.
“Whoa! At least give me a chance to change,” Billy answered as he threw his book bag on the desk and quickly pulled his shirt over his head. He balled the shirt up and shot it basketball-style through a hoop that hung over his laundry basket. “Did you see that!” he bragged and looked to Stuart for a compliment, but Stuart’s gaze suggested he was more interested in Billy’s chest than he was with the swish-shot. Normally, Billy would’ve called him out on it, but he needed Stuart’s help. So, instead, he just quickly grabbed a clean shirt from his chest of drawers and put it on.
Once they got into studying, he forgot about Stuart’s awkward gaze and focused on the work...not that he understood much of it.
“Come on, it’s easy,” Stuart told Billy but as he waited for an answer to the question he had asked, Billy’s face showed his total and utter confusion.
“Fuck it! I can’t get this shit!” Billy yelled out in frustration. After a few minutes of awkward silence he announced that he needed a break. “Let’s go get a snack.”
“Sure,” Stuart replied, as if he had any choice in the matter.
While Billy searched the pantry for something they could snack on, Stuart racked his brains for a method he could use to get Billy a passing grade on the test.
“You know, you’re a smart guy...maybe you can find a way to take the test for me,” Billy joked. He wasn’t just trying to be funny, though. He was hoping it would be something that Stuart would seriously consider.
“I’m not the only smart one here,” Stuart said, suddenly sounding more in control. His stutter had all but vanished. “You can do this. I have faith in you, Billy!”
“Yeah?” Billy asked, turning towards Stuart for validation. It had been the first time he had truly looked at Stuart. The boy definitely had a nerdy side, but if he removed his glasses and styled his hair and wore clothes that were a little more fashionable, Billy knew Stuart could give even him a run for his money.
“Yeah,” Stuart confirmed confidently with a smile. Billy wasn’t sure why, but having someone as smart as Stuart have faith in him mattered. No one had really told him that he was smart before. Sure, they said he was handsome, and charming, and a great athlete...but never smart. No one ever told him he had what it took to get an ‘A’. Stuart was a virtual stranger to him, but his opinion mattered, and even helped him have confidence in himself.
After they finished their snack, Stuart and Billy returned to Billy’s room where Stuart filled him in on his plan. “You have to memorize plays for Lacrosse, right?” Stuart asked.
“Yeah..so?” Billy wasn’t sure where Stuart was going with his question.
“Well, that’s how we’re going to get you through this. You might never truly figure out how to understand Shakespeare or the other literary items appearing on the exam. BUT, that doesn’t mean we can’t get you to memorize the answers.”
Billy liked the idea, but he was still skeptical. He wasn’t sure he could memorize so much in such a little amount of time. “Alright...tell me what I have to do.”
For the next hour, Stuart gave Billy some tips for memorizing facts using both sight and sound as triggers. It required Billy write everything down ten times and as he did, he had to also speak whatever he was writing. He felt silly doing it, but he did have to admit it was working.
“We’ve got a lot of work to do, but I think you’re getting it,” Stuart told Billy as they made their way down to eat dinner.
“I owe you, dude! You’re a lifesaver!”
As Billy took two plates from the fridge and popped them in the microwave, Stuart wondered if they were the only two that would be eating. “Wh-Where are your parents?” he asked Billy.
“My mom died,” Billy answered with his back turned after a few moments of silence. When he turned to face Stuart he added, “And my father isn’t home much.”
“I’m sorry.” It was all Stuart could say. Though he and Billy were so di
fferent and lived completely opposite lives, Stuart recognized the look he saw in Billy’s eyes. It was the look of sadness and loneliness...a look Stuart knew only too well.
After they ate, Stuart said he needed to get home. “Let me grab my keys and I’ll take you,” Billy suggested.
“N-n-no, I-I can w-w-w-alk,” Stuart replied, his stutter coming back full force.
“You’re not walking, dude. It’s late. I’m driving you...and that’s that!” Billy answered. Once they were in Billy’s jeep, he asked Stuart for his address so he could put it in his GPS, but Stuart didn’t want to say. “What? What is it?” Billy demanded to know.
“I-I d-don’t want you to know wh-wh-where I l-l-live,” Stuart answered, his face turning red with embarrassment.
“Dude, just give me your address,” Billy demanded. He didn’t know what the big deal was.
Finally, Stuart filled him in. “I’m not rich! Okay? I live in a one bedroom apartment with my step-dad! Are you happy?!”
Billy was stunned and at first he didn’t know what to say. He just sat there watching Stuart break down in tears. It never occurred to him that Stuart wasn’t from a wealthy family. He wasn’t sure how Stuart was able to even attend St. Vincent’s Academy, but suddenly the no car, no cell phone, all of it made sense. Without thinking about it, he pulled Stuart over to him and embraced him. “It’s okay. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, Stuart. But, if you want, it’ll just be our little secret, okay?”
Chapter 5
As Billy pulled up to Stuart’s apartment building, a sense of shame ran through him. His first thought was about how embarrassed he’d be if he had to live in such a dump, but that just reminded him of how spoiled he truly was. He knew that if he hadn’t spent the last few hours getting to know Stuart and just saw him out on the streets, he would be laughing it up with his friends at how poor Stuart was. He didn’t want to be that guy, though. He wanted to think he was above that.
“Th-thanks f-for the lift,” Stuart said as he lowered his head and hopped out of the jeep.
“Hey!” Billy shouted from the driver’s seat, “Thank you for all of your help.” He said it in a way that caused Stuart to look up and meet Billy’s gaze. In that moment, the two young men shared an unspoken moment.
Billy drove back home, but instead of listening to the radio like he normally would, he found himself lost in thought. He couldn’t get Stuart out of his mind. In the past, he had been so quick to judge anyone like Stuart, or anyone, for that matter, that wasn’t part of his elite jock world. But he could see how wrong he had been, and wanted to do something to make amends for it.
He and Stuart weren’t that different after all. They both only had a father and they both went home everyday to an empty house.
As Billy changed for bed, and took his time flossing and brushing his teeth, he replayed the night in his head. It was something he did a lot but had never anyone about. He wasn’t even sure why he did it, or when it started, but whenever Billy was alone in a car or at home alone at night, he would find his mind replaying every incident and conversation though his day, over and over again.
The thoughts replaying in his mind currently weighed heavier on his heart than normal. He silently promised himself that he was going to do whatever he could to be a friend to Stuart. Though he didn’t know the details of Stuart’s life, he assumed it wasn’t an especially happy one. He never saw Stuart with any friends at school, and his home life didn’t seem great. The least he could do for Stuart’s help passing his Literature final was to befriend the kid and make his high school existence a little better.
That night, Billy tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep. His mind was filled with the facts Stuart had him work on memorizing. When that wasn’t occupying his brain, he was imaging ways he could make Stuart feel included at school. By the time he did finally fall asleep, Billy only had three hours until it would be time to wake up and get ready for school.
In spite of an almost sleepless night, Billy bolted from his bed at the first sound of his alarm. He was excited to start his day and put some of his thoughts and plans into motion. He couldn’t remember the last time he was so excited to go to school. Something about befriending Stuart made Billy feel good about himself, and not just because he was good looking, and popular. For the first time, he was feeling good about himself...proud...because of his actions.
He took a quick shower before heading to his closet to get dressed. As he watched himself getting dressed in the full length mirror inside of his closet, Billy had another idea. He made a mental note to ask Stuart over after school as he tied his school tie and grabbed his jacket and book bag.
Chapter 6
Billy had looked for Stuart all over at school, but didn’t locate him until the beginning of the lunch period. “Hey! Been looking all over for you,” he said, half out of breath, as he caught up with Stuart who was sitting alone in the cafeteria.
Stuart responded with a shocked look on his face. He certainly didn’t seem to be expecting Billy to ever be looking for him. Sure, they had gotten along the day before, but that was outside of school. Normally a guy like Billy wouldn’t give Stuart the time of day if there was a chance on his friends seeing the interaction. “M-m-me?” Stuart asked, unsure if he had even heard Billy correctly. He even looked around to see if there were any jocks nearby that maybe Billy had been talking to instead. There weren’t.
“Yes, you...silly,” Billy said as he took a seat at the table. “I wanted to make sure we were still on for a study session after school.”
“S-sure,” Stuart stuttered. “I assumed you had plans with your friends, though.”
“I do have some plans, but not til later in the evening,” Billy explained but before he could continue a group of his friends came up behind him.
“Whatcha doing here?” Jeff asked Billy with an upturned nose. Stuart noticed the look and wasn’t sure if it was directed towards him or the cafeteria. Either way, he was starting to feel really nervous.
“I’m talking with Stuart,” Billy answered, non-chalantly. “You guys know Stuart, right?” he asked his friends who just responded mainly with grunts. “I was thinking maybe Stuart would like to come to tonight’s party.”
“I’m sure our party isn’t really Stanley’s scene,” Jeff replied with a wicked grin that told Stuart he had messed up his name on purpose.
“Y-y-yeah. I’m n-n-not m-much of a p-p-partier,” Stuart answered, looking down at his food.
“Sure, you are. And, you’re going to be my guest,” Billy insisted before turning towards Jeff, “And, his name is Stuart...get it right.”
Jeff’s mouth dropped at being corrected in front of their group of friends and Stuart couldn’t help but smile slightly.
After Billy’s friends left, he apologized for them. “It’s fine, but I really don’t think...,” Stuart began but Billy cut him off.
“You’re going! That’s that. We’re Seniors and it’s part of high school. For one night you can let loose and just enjoy yourself.” Stuart started to protest again, but before he could Billy added, “I’ll meet you after school in the parking lot.” With that, he was off to join his friends.
As soon as Billy caught up with his friends, Jeff let into him. “What the fuck was that, bro?!?!”
“You were being a douche, Jeff. Stuart’s cool. Leave him alone,” Billy politely warned.
Before Jeff could argue, Billy turned his attention towards Jessica Leigh. “Are you ready for our date tonight?” he asked before planting a long, passionate kiss on her soft lips.
“A party isn’t really much of a date...especially now that you invited that geek to tag-along,” Jessica Leigh answered, surprising Billy. He thought if anyone in his group would be cool with Stuart, it’d be her. Deciding it wasn’t worth getting in a bad mood over, Billy just kissed his girlfriend’s forehead and promised that they’d have plenty of romantic, alone time. “We’ll see,” she answered before turning her attention back to the crowd.
Billy knew she was just giving him the cold shoulder to make a point, but he wasn’t going to let anything spoil the day he was having.
The rest of Billy’s school day went by fairly fast. Friday’s usually did. He did find that when he was in Mr. Simon’s class, he was paying a bit more attention and trying hard to really understand some of the material. He had to chuckle to himself. He was changing, maturing. Even he barely recognized himself when he raised his hand to answer a question.
“Mr. Markstock, do you need to go to the restroom?” Mr. Simon asked, not to be funny. He just didn’t seem to think Billy was actually raising his hand to answer the question he had asked. That didn’t stop the rest of the class from erupting in laughter.
At first, Billy was hurt, but he knew he was the one that built his own reputation as being a dumb jock. All he could do was prove them wrong. “No,” he answered. “I’d like to answer the question.”
Mr. Simon gave the class a shocked look but allowed Billy to proceed and answer the question. His feigned look of shock turned genuine when Billy’s answer was correct. “Very good. I’m impressed,” he told Billy before moving on with the next question.
It was only one correct question, but it made Billy feel so great. It meant not only that he was smart, but that he was also getting the hang of a subject that only the day before had completely confused him. He owed it all to Stuart. He hoped the surprise he had in mind for Stuart went over well.
As soon as school was over for the day, Billy met up with Jessica Leigh and headed to the parking lot. “Are you finished being mad at me?” he asked.
“Who says I was mad at you?” Jessica Leigh asked, but her smile revealed that she had been. “I just want some alone time with you,” she whined.
