by Barb Han
“How?” She was genuinely curious. She’d talked enough about herself and wanted to know more about Cash.
“Poachers, for one. Cattle rustlers are another serious threat. Wild animals have taken down a few men over the years. Wild hogs are nasty and dangerous. Human error while running equipment can be deadly, and is one of the biggest killers. And then there’s Mother Nature herself.”
“Wow. I had no idea. The biggest threat in the suburb where I used to live was traffic.” Dallas traffic was a force to be reckoned with for sure.
“I still have a whole helluva lot of respect for what you’ve been able to accomplish despite tough beginnings.” He managed to cycle the conversation back around to her.
“You managed to make something of yourself despite growing up in a place like this.” She was still in awe of the O’Connor family home. It was something to behold.
“Are you saying that I could’ve ended up a trust fund baby? Because I doubt that would float on a hard-working cattle ranch like KBR.” He laughed and it broke some of the intensity of the conversation. She figured it was part defense mechanism to laugh when the conversation turned serious. She’d been guilty of that herself, which made it easier to recognize in someone else.
The break in tension was a welcome reprieve. It also made her think of normal things, like taking a shower.
“Any chance I can grab a shower while she’s sleeping?”
His smile was devastating. He shook his head. “Probably not a good idea to put the image of you naked in my...never mind.” He nodded toward the en suite bathroom. “I already had your clothes brought to the main house and the others have been washed. You should find them in there.”
Being with Cash, with someone who thought about her needs, stirred more of those falling-into-the-deep-end feelings in her chest. She took in a breath, smiled to herself and walked into the bathroom.
* * *
“YOU’LL BE OKAY with her if she wakes?” Renee stopped at the door. He didn’t want to notice the soft curve of her hip, so he adjusted his focus.
“Did okay with twin nephews at this age. I think I can handle one.” Technically, he’d been alone with them only once. This wasn’t the time to discuss his qualifications, or lack thereof. As close as he was to Colton and all of his brothers save for Garrett, Cash had always been married to his work. If Abby stirred, he could figure out a way to handle the situation while Renee showered. She seemed to trust him and quietly closed the bathroom door behind her.
Cash opened the laptop he’d brought with him from the kitchen, which pulled up one of his favorite family pictures. It was the summer before senior year. Cash and his brothers had been working the ranch and, for reasons he couldn’t pinpoint now, he and Garrett had gotten into an argument. The day had been a scorcher. The temps had topped off at one hundred and seven for the third day in a row. All six boys had been working the ranch since four o’clock, his father’s usual wake-up time. It was the time of year in Texas when the weather never cooled off.
So, it was probably teenage hormones baking in a hot sun all day that had him and Garrett on edge with each other. Garrett had popped his mouth off about something or other and Cash had stomped over and gotten in his brother’s face. Wrong move. As an adult, he’d learned to reason his way out of most situations. Foolish pride had him challenging Garrett, poking the angry bear.
Garrett had always been a hothead, so it hadn’t been difficult to get him riled up. Cash had probably just needed to blow off some steam. Garrett had thrown the first punch. The two of them had ended up on the ground in a wrestling match. Until their mother had caught wind of what was happening.
She hadn’t raise her voice. They’d had no idea she was even there until the bucket of ice-cold water doused them.
Two people had never jumped up so fast in their lives. Both ready to fight because they’d had no idea they’d be staring Margaret O’Connor in the face. Even then, she’d been a tiny storm best left untouched. The rest of his brothers had stood in a semicircle, snickering, which had gotten Cash and Garrett in even more trouble because they’d both started cracking up. Their mother hadn’t seen the humor in her sons getting into a fistfight.
Pops had heard the commotion from the barn. Next thing Cash knew he’d been staring down both of his parents. Pops had asked what had happened.
Garrett had started by saying, “Well, sir. My brother here is a donkey’s backside.”
At those words, Cash had lost it. Just when he’d expected to be reamed out, Pops had laughed, too. That’d made their mother crack up. She’d walked to him and Garrett and pulled them both into a hug. Her dress had been soaked. Pops had picked her up and pretended he was about to toss her into the pond. She’d been as calm as she could be when she’d dared him to do it.
Even Pops had known not to cross his wife. She was five feet, five inches of pure dynamite. Slim Jenkins had watched the scene unfold. He’d told everyone to squeeze in for a picture. All of the boys had groaned. But they’d done it. The picture was of Pops carrying his wife and their boys flanking them, two of whom were soaked to the bone in pond water.
Everyone had a silly smile plastered on their face. All of which were the real deal unlike those Christmas card pictures their mother had liked to force on them. At least she hadn’t insisted they all wear the same sweater. It could’ve been a lot worse.
But this was Cash’s all-time favorite family pic. It was messy. The boys were precocious. Their parents loved the family no matter what, dirty pond water and all.
This was the real O’Connor family. Despite Garrett’s current shortcomings, he needed to know what was going on. Pops had never wanted a real funeral. He’d be angry that everyone was so sad when there was work to get done.
No doubt, Margaret O’Connor would respect her husband’s wishes. There would be a small ceremony, a remembrance, a celebration of his life. A few tears slipped out at the thought of Pops never walking through the back door again, sweaty from a hard day’s work and still dressed in a long-sleeve button-down shirt. Although most cattle ranchers used pickup trucks to herd cattle nowadays, Pops considered himself a renaissance man. He rode his horse every day to check fences to see if any part needed repair. Most people would be surprised at just how much of a cattleman’s life was spent doing paperwork and checking fences to ensure the safety of their livestock.
Wiping blurry eyes, Cash zeroed in on his email. With his cell phone almost constantly being available, he hadn’t thought about sending his brother an email. Since no one else had come up with any better ideas, Cash pulled up their last exchange. He checked the date. It had been three years ago. His brother wasn’t the type to have a social media account, so this was his best bet for the time being.
But what should he say over email? He didn’t want to puke the news out without preparing Garrett for what was coming. He also needed the note to sound urgent enough to get his brother’s attention.
Garrett,
I realize we’ve been out of touch. You’re needed at home. There’s serious news. Call or come home.
Your brother,
Cash
It wasn’t Shakespeare, but it got the point across. He added his cell number under his name in case Garrett wanted to reach out.
Cash took a deep breath and hit Send. There was no good time to deliver bad news, and he hated that Garrett didn’t already know.
Rubbing his temples, he tried to stave off one helluva headache. The shower water was on full force in the adjacent bathroom. He could hear it even through the door. And, yes, his thoughts immediately went to Renee standing naked in the shower. But he managed to refocus.
Staring at a computer screen wasn’t helping the throb above his eyes, and besides, his mother had always repeated the phrase about a watched pot never boiling. As he lowered the screen, a message popped up.
It was from Garrett.
<
br /> Lost my cell. On my way home.
Chapter Sixteen
Cash couldn’t sleep if he tried. He’d gone days without shut-eye before while working a case and this one was shaping up to be no exception. Rather than fight it or dread it, he settled in as he heard the water turn off in the adjacent room.
He texted his brothers to let them know Garrett was on his way home. Then he messaged their mother. She needed to know her son was coming.
Unless they were missing something, there were three suspects left in Renee’s case: McGee, Jamison and Yolanda.
The lawyer reopened old wounds with his connection to another town resident. A feeling of dread that Ms. Hubert could be linked to his sister’s case was growing, niggling away at the back of his mind. The reality of losing his father was also starting to sink in. It had been one helluva couple of days since meeting Renee.
Much of Cash’s life was being turned upside down and there was still a sense of rightness in the world with Renee and Abby in the picture.
Just as he thought about Renee, she came walking out of the bathroom. His heart took another dive. Renee was beautiful, inside and out. Watching her love for Abby was nothing short of inspirational and mesmerizing. Learning about her past and how far she’d come rocketed her into a whole new stratosphere of respect.
“What is it?” Grooves deepened on her forehead as those sky blue eyes penetrated his armor.
He started to speak but no words came. She seemed to understand as she walked straight to him and sat down on his lap. Her leggings and T-shirt hugged her curves. Beads of water rolled down her neck.
He looped his arms around her waist as she turned to straddle him. No words seemed necessary as she brought her hands up to his face.
“I know you can’t kiss me because of the investigation.” She leaned forward. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t kiss you.”
Cash started to protest but it would be half-hearted. He brought his mouth to hers and pressed his lips to hers with the feeling of being home.
With a groan, he deepened the kiss. Her soft pink lips tasted like heaven. Peppermint toothpaste filled his senses. Peppermint was his new favorite flavor.
Her tongue delved into his mouth as she scooted her sweet, round bottom closer to his length. The effect she had on him was instantaneous, and a force of its own. He pressed his palms to the soft curve of her lower back and she rocked back and forth as she moaned her pleasure.
Her fingers dug into his shoulders, her nails against his hot skin as she dropped them to his arms was pure sin on Sunday. A need so intense Cash could scarcely fathom it welled up. He dropped his hands to each side of her hips as she rocked a little more.
His pulse raced, matching the tempo of hers. Reason escaped him as blood flew south. He tried to convince himself that lack of oxygen to the brain wasn’t enabling him to break the rules. The annoying voice in the back of his mind returned, though. Repeating the two words that had the power to stop him in his tracks. Game changer.
With enormous effort, he pulled back.
“Believe me when I say that I want this to happen more than you could possibly imagine.” His words came out through labored breaths.
“Why stop then?” She managed to say through her own heaves.
He didn’t immediately respond. He needed a minute to slow his heart rate, and another to convince himself he was doing the right thing. “My job, for one.”
Her shoulders deflated with his cop-out. “You’re not exactly forcing me to do anything. In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve been the forward one.”
“That’s not an issue for me. I like it a little too much when you take the lead.” This time, he looked her straight in the eye because she needed to know where he stood. “Here’s the other thing and it’s the most important one. I’ve come to realize that you wouldn’t be a casual fling for me, Renee. And your life is complicated right now. I’d be in the way. Plus, you’ve already said you’re not ready for anything more than friends. What would we be doing here?”
“Not sleeping.” She stared at him for a long moment. “I’m sorry I basically attacked you but—”
“Come on. We both know I was a willing participant.”
“Plus, I doubt anything between us could be less than mind blowing,” she said in a tone of voice that implied he’d offended her. Damn. He hadn’t meant to do that. But she was temptation on a stick and he needed to keep a handle on his attraction.
“You’re not making this any easier on me.” He wanted nothing more than to block out the rest of the world and get lost with Renee even if it was for only a few hours. Once would never be enough with her. He’d want more and wouldn’t be able to give it.
“You are right about one thing. My life is complicated.” She climbed off his lap and sat on the bed. Her cheeks turned beet red and she toyed with the edge of the blanket. “I apologize for—”
“Don’t. Believe me, you didn’t hurt my feelings. You couldn’t hurt my feelings if you tried. It’s just not the play right now. You know?” He was doing a bad job explaining himself. “I know what I said before about not being ready to commit to anyone right now. But you’re changing that for me. Being with you is a game changer. I don’t know exactly what that means but I’ve never felt this way about anyone before you. If you decide you’re ready for the possibility of something more...”
“You were right to stop things before they got out of control.” The blush to her cheeks made him feel guilty.
“Being out of control with you would probably be one of my best days.” His attempt at humor fell flat. If he’d met her a couple of years ago and she wasn’t someone linked to his case, this would be a different situation. Kissing a beautiful woman was high on his list of things he enjoyed. But his heart wouldn’t appreciate being stomped on as she walked out the door.
Damn. Was that the real reason he’d stopped her?
Cash forced the question aside and glanced at the clock. “All kidding aside, the little one won’t be asleep much longer. I’m here. I’ll probably just sleep on the chair. You can go to bed.”
Now she really did laugh. “I’m betting that I’ll be safe on the bed with you on it. You haven’t slept in longer than me. You might as well claim the spot right here.” She patted the pillow. “I promise to keep my hands to myself.”
What she said was meant to be a joke, but Cash couldn’t bring himself to laugh. In fact, there was nothing about her promise to leave him alone he thought was funny. How was that for proof that his priorities were upside-down?
“I probably won’t be able to sleep, but I’m going to give it a shot anyway.” She curled on her side on top of the covers, so he cut off the light.
Getting in bed with her was a bad idea. Instead, he waited until he heard her soft, steady breathing before easing his weight off the chair and heading toward the bathroom. A quick, cold shower woke him up. Damn good thing because he needed to be able to think clearly.
Cash walked over to the bassinet to check on the sleeping baby. Once he knew Abby was good, he returned to the chair and sat down. His head wasn’t throbbing anymore, but it wouldn’t hurt to close his eyes for a second or two.
The next thing he knew, the room was filled with light. He snapped his head up and glanced around. He rubbed his blurry eyes, looked down and saw that Renee had covered him with a blanket.
“Good morning.” Her honey voice washed over him. She was sitting on the floor with a blanket spread out, playing with Abby.
“Morning,” he grumbled. “I need coffee. Can I bring you a cup?”
“Already got one.” She nodded toward the mug on the dresser.
A smile formed on his lips. He liked the fact she’d made herself comfortable at the ranch. “Baby’s fed?”
“Fed, bathed and changed.”
“How long was I out?” He checked the clock.
“Not too long. The minute she moved, I picked her up because I didn’t want her to disturb you.”
“I’m usually a light sleeper.” He raked his hand through his hair.
“You needed the rest.” There’d be no argument there.
“How about breakfast? Did you eat?” He needed to grab coffee for himself and, at the very least, a piece of toast.
She shot him a look. “Now that you mention it, I didn’t eat. Any chance you have something light in the kitchen? Yogurt? A banana?”
“Do you like eggs and bacon?”
“Oh, bacon. Who doesn’t love bacon?”
“How about a refresh on the coffee?” He walked over to the dresser to pick up her mug after she smiled and nodded.
“You should also know that once your mother found out about my tech skills, she offered me a job here.”
Cash liked the sound of that a little too much.
“Did you take it?” He tried to sound casual.
“It’s tempting. I told her that I’d think about it.”
* * *
RENEE WAS IN serious trouble when it came to Cash. He had that whole ruggedly handsome bit down pat. He was also thoughtful and kind, and strong. She’d blinked her eyes open to see him checking on Abby last night and then pretended to be asleep. Her heart was pure liquid butter in her chest at the sight of him looking after her daughter.
To say she liked talking to him was a lot like saying beef came from cows. Looking back, it was strange to think how bad things got between her and Jamison before she’d decided to call it quits. The decision had been so hard at the time and now she only wished she’d done it years ago.
How many times had she read a book or disappeared into the bedroom to avoid having a conversation with Jamison in recent years, and especially the last three or four? More than she could count.
In fact, it had become her habit. She’d listen to him talk about his day, smiling and nodding as he went into great detail about his general frustrations or his problems with a client. And when he was done, he would grab a beer and head off to watch football in the other room or spend time in front of the TV or on his laptop.
