by Leslie North
He was used to talking to suspects, informants, other military personnel. He wasn’t used to giving horrible news to people he loved.
Shit. Just shit.
On the one hand, he was glad to finally know the mastermind behind it all. But on the other hand, he couldn’t imagine how Serena was going to feel when she discovered someone she’d trusted had betrayed her.
This. This was exactly why he’d worked so hard all these years to keep his heart out of the equation. Because once you cared too much, things got hard. Way, way harder than anything he’d ever dealt with as a SEAL. Back then, he could rely on his strength and his skills as a trained warrior to get him through. Now, he was walking in there blind without a clue about what he was doing or how she’d react.
After a few more moments of gathering his thoughts, Noah got out of the car and walked up to the front door. Levon and Clint were still with the police on their way to arrest Serena’s brother, Nate Carson, so it would just be him and Serena and Olive. He steeled his courage and walked inside to find the two women’s attention glued to the TV screen in the living room.
“Hey,” he said, for lack of a better greeting, as he shut the door behind him.
“Noah!” Serena jumped up and rushed over to him to throw her arms around his waist and hug him, a big grin on her face. “You got the guy!”
“Yeah,” he said, patting her back awkwardly while looking over at Olive. Whatever showed on his face must have been enough to convince the other woman to clear out, because she unfolded her legs from beneath her and stood.
“I’m going to go check on Allie and Gracie,” Olive said, hurrying upstairs. “Be back in a little while.”
Noah just stood there for a moment, holding Serena, enjoying how good she felt in his arms. He knew this might be the last time it would happen. Finally he kissed the top of her head, inhaling her fragrance, then stepped back to let her go. “Sit down for a minute. There’s something I need to tell you.”
“Is it about the mercenary? Did he put up a fight? I bet you kicked his ass good,” she chattered on as she took his hand and led him over to the sofa to sit beside her. “I wish I’d been there. I’d have liked to punch him again too.”
“Listen, Serena,” Noah said, swiping his hand through his hair. “The mercenary—Spencer—had his cell phone with him. That was how he’d been contacted about the job. We got it off him and Clint was able to trace the text messages on his SIM card back to the person who’d hired him. The police are already making plans to bring that man into custody.”
Serena’s eyes widened and she gasped. “Oh. My. God! That’s fantastic! That means you’ve taken them all down.” She clapped her hands with glee. “Who was it? Was it the drug cartels, like you thought? Or no. Maybe it was someone related to the charities. After you said that, I got to thinking about some of the mega-corporations we’ve pissed off over the years by backing legislation to stop their polluting and raping the land all over the world. Or maybe—”
“No.” He took her hands and held them in his, sighing and staring down at their entwined fingers. “It wasn’t anyone we thought it was.”
“Really?” She frowned. “Then who?”
Noah took a deep breath and just came out with it, thinking quicker was better. Like ripping off a bandage. “It was your brother. Nate. He’s the one who put a target on your back.”
For a moment, Serena just looked at him, not saying a word, and he wondered if maybe she hadn’t heard him. But then the light in her eyes slowly faded and her face fell. “No. That can’t be right. Nate wouldn’t do something like that.”
“It was him, Serena. We have proof.”
“What? Phone calls? Some texts?” She pulled away from him and stood to pace the room. “Anyone could’ve sent those. Maybe someone stole his phone and used it to throw suspicion off of them.”
He exhaled slowly and shook his head. “There were funds sent to Spencer that tracked back to Nate’s bank accounts. It was him, Serena. I’m sorry.”
And he was. Sorrier than he’d ever been in his life. Even though it wasn’t his fault, somehow it felt like it was because he was the one who’d had to tell her, the one to break her heart.
Still, she didn’t seem to want to believe him. Serena crossed her arms and stopped across the room from him, scowling. “It makes no sense. None. Why would Nate want to have me killed?”
“My guess is the money.”
“Money?”
“Yeah.” He slumped back into the cushions and toyed with the hem of his shirt, not looking at her because it hurt too bad to see the pain in her eyes. “When your parents died in that crash, you told me they put you in charge of the company. You became CEO—with all the money and perks that come along with it. People have done worse things for less.”
“But Nate and I talked about it.” She threw up her hands. “I told him that it was probably just a formality. We were still going to run the company together. Nothing was going to change.”
“Except you’re a billionaire now and he’s not.”
“That’s a shitty thing to say,” she growled at him.
“Not as shitty as trying to have your own sibling killed,” Noah countered before he could stop himself. He’d never met Nate Carson, but right now, Noah could have killed him with his bare hands. “The police are with Levon and Clint organizing a sting to capture him.”
“I…” She snorted then turned away, rubbing the heels of her hands into her eyes. “I can’t believe this. I just can’t…”
Noah got up and walked over to her, pulling her into his arms despite her resistance. “Like I said, I’m sorry this is how it turned out. I really am. But at least now we know, and things can get back to normal again.”
“Normal?” She shook her head against his chest, her words muffled by the cotton of his T-shirt. “How the hell can things ever be normal again?”
Good question.
He’d been asking himself the same thing since last night. He’d woken up well before dawn to get ready for the takedown, but instead of getting up right away, he’d lain there in the dark trying to think of a reason for him to stay in her life after the mission wrapped up.
He couldn’t think of a one, except Gracie.
And damn if that didn’t suck. Because he’d been through that before with his own parents. The two of them only stayed together because of him, even though they were all wrong for each other, and look how that had turned out. Not good. Not good at all. And yes, he loved Serena—more than he loved anything on earth—but given how different their lives and goals were, sometimes love wasn’t enough.
After a few minutes of just standing there, holding her, Serena finally pulled away from him. She brushed her hands over her damp cheeks, and it was only then that he realized she’d been crying. The sight gutted him more than he’d ever imagined. He tried to reach for her again, but she stepped back.
“So, what now?” she said, her voice quiet and flat, the bright smile gone.
“With the mission, you mean?” Noah said, deliberately avoiding the elephant in the room. “Well, one they’ve executed their plan for the arrest, they’ll bring your brother in to police headquarters for questioning and then bring formal charges based on the evidence.”
She nodded, staring down at her toes. “And what about us?”
“They’ll want to talk to you too,” he said. “Interview you about the abduction and your time in St. Dourdane. Any interactions with your brother you’ve had since your parents died. They’ll probably want to talk to other people at your company, too. If you’ve got a legal department on staff, you might want to let them know what’s going on so they’ll be prepared if some detectives come by, wanting to talk to your workers.” He hazarded a look at her and found her watching him, her gaze solemn and serious. “And as far as everything else, it should be safe for you to return home in a few days, once the arrest takes place. After that, you’ll want to continue to take precautions for the time being, of co
urse, in case anyone out of the loop thinks the price on your head is still active, but maybe—”
“Noah,” she said, giving him a stern look. “I’m talking about us. You and me and Gracie.”
His chest seemed to cave in on itself, a black hole emerging where his heart used to be and sucking all the joy out of his universe. But this was how it had to be. There couldn’t be a “them,” a family unit with the three of them. Not with his dangerous lifestyle in SSoF and her work taking her all over the globe. His life was here in Atlanta. Hers was wherever her corporation or charities needed her. Gracie would stay with her. He’d see the kid when he could, if he could. She’d probably be better off without him being around too much, anyway.
Knowing it was the right thing didn’t make doing it any easier, though.
Summoning the stoic reserve that had been trained into him in the SEALs, he gave curt nod. “As of now, there is no ‘us.’ The mission is over and we both return to our normal realities. The fantasy we lived in for the last few weeks is gone.”
She flinched slightly and he fisted his hands to keep from reaching out and pulling her back into him. This hurt worse than when he’d taken shrapnel after an IED explosion. There were still a few tiny metal pieces stuck in his calf from that, but they were nothing compared to the iron blade stabbing through his raging emotions. He didn’t show any of that inner turmoil, though, because he couldn’t. It would break him. So instead he just stood there, waiting for his words to sink in.
“But what about last night?” she asked, reaching for him. This time he stepped back, and her hand fell to her side. “What about our future?”
“There is no future for us.” His voice sliced through the air between them like a scalpel, cutting out the happiness they could have had together, ripping it to shreds. “This isn’t one of those things you can wish into reality. I warned you about that in the jungle. There is no us.”
Finally, Serena swallowed hard and headed for the stairs. “Thanks for letting me know. I’m going to go up and check on Gracie now.”
Noah watched her go, knowing he’d just taken the most precious thing in the world and thrown it all away. But he wouldn’t take it back, even if he could. There was no other way. With no reason to stay there any longer, he turned and walked back out to his car, then drove away, staring at the outline of the house until it disappeared around the corner. He’d call Serena later and check in on Gracie, but for now, he needed to get out of there before he lost it, big time, and begged her to forget what he’d said and stay with him forever.
Forever wasn’t in the cards for them, no matter how he dealt them.
20
Two days later, Spencer had agreed to a plea deal in which he’d help law enforcement and SSoF capture Nate Carson. Until then, Noah and Serena were both packing up what little they had to move out of Levon and Olive’s house and go their separate ways.
This had been exactly what Noah had wanted, but as he shoved items into his duffle bag without paying much attention, he thought he really should have felt better about the whole situation than he did.
Truth be told, he missed Serena. Missed her smile and her laugh and the way she used to snuggle up to him at night while she slept. Since the evening when he’d told her about Nate being behind her kidnapping, he’d slept on the sofa downstairs in the living room. And considering some of the dicey places he’d slept over the years, it was the Ritz Carlton—but it just wasn’t the same as lying beside Serena.
With a sigh, he shoved another handful of clothes into his bag. They’d be wrinkled as hell once he got them to his house and unpacked, but what did he care? No one was there to impress anyway.
Serena sidled past him with an armload of toiletries from the bathroom, accidentally bumping into him when he turned fast, then pulling away quickly, like she’d been burned. “Sorry,” she said without looking at him. “Excuse me.”
He grunted and stepped aside to get out of her way. Dammit. It shouldn’t be like this but it was, and he supposed he ought to be glad that it was nearly over. She was heading back to her luxury apartment and he was returning to his tiny bungalow, not far from Levon and Olive’s place. Though he’d lived there for nearly a year, it was still depressingly sparse. At least it came with the appliances, so there was that. The place still felt awfully empty, with just him there. Given he’d basically destroyed the fragile bond between him and Serena, it probably always would.
That was fine, though. He had his work. He had his missions. He had the outcome he’d wanted and his normal life back, just like he’d planned. He’d get over this thing with her and see the baby on special occasions and holidays and it was all good.
Isn’t it?
Noah had just finished packing his duffle and was zipping it up when the doorbell rang downstairs.
Muffled voices echoed up the staircase followed by Levon calling out, “Uh, Noah? Dude, there’s someone here to see you.”
Huh. Noah frowned. He wasn’t expecting anyone. He set his duffle near the door and turned back to Serena. “Be right back.”
She didn’t even look up from her bag, just mumbled, “Hmm.”
Yeah. Serena had put him out of her mind already. She’d be fine without him.
He’d be the only one still stuck in the past.
And speaking of the past…
Noah reached the bottom stair and stopped in his tracks. “Mom? What are you doing here?”
“You think you can just drop a bomb on me like that about my first grandchild and not expect me to follow up?” his mother said, stepping into the foyer out of the bright sunlight. “We tracked you down here and we want to see Gracie.”
We? His brain had no sooner registered that word before another figure stepped into the foyer behind his mom. At first, all Noah could see was a silhouette of a man carrying what looked like a large stuffed animal in his arms. But as Levon closed the door behind them and the man moved forward, Noah came face to face with the last person he wanted to see right now—his father.
He looked from his dad’s face to his mom’s, then back again, blinking several times before saying, “What the hell, Mom?”
“Language, Noah,” his mom chided. “Especially with a baby in the house.”
Olive came down the hall and stopped beside Levon, who was watching the proceedings with interest. “Noah, are these your parents?” she asked. “Can you introduce us, please?”
Wooden and wary, he did as she asked, still trying to wrap his brain around the fact that not only had his mom traveled all the way here but that she’d brought his dad along. Last he knew, his father was long gone to parts unknown. But seeing them together today—not only in the same room, but also apparently getting along swimmingly—knocked him back a step or two. “Uh, yeah. Okay. Olive and Levon, this is my mom and dad, Danielle and Patrick. Mom, Dad—this is Levon and Olive’s house. They’ve been hosting us since we got back stateside.”
“Nice to meet you both,” Olive said, shaking their hands. Levon did the same. Then she said, “Why don’t you come in here and sit down while you catch up with Noah. Can I get you something to drink? Tea or water? I can make some coffee too, if you’d like.”
“Tea is fine, thank you,” his mother said, taking a seat on the sofa where Noah had slept the night before.
His dad set the huge stuffed pink elephant down in one of the armchairs and took a seat beside his mom, putting his arm around her shoulders and pulling her into his side, like they were young lovebirds or something. “Tea’s great for me too, thanks. With some honey, if you have it.”
“Sure thing,” Olive said, walking past Noah and giving him a look. “Go in there and be nice.”
Noah tried to wipe the scowl off his face and failed miserably. He had no idea what they were doing here, together, nor was he in the mood for entertaining. Still, they’d come all this way, and his mother had raised him right. He took a deep breath and wandered into the living room to sit across from his parents, next seat over
from the elephant. “So, how’d you figure out where we were staying?”
“That nice young man at your office told us,” his mom said, placing her hand on his father’s knee and drawing a deeper scowl from Noah. “Clint? I think that’s his name. You’ve been so busy, I haven’t met anyone you work with yet. Well, except for Levon here.” She gestured toward his buddy, who was leaning an elbow on the fireplace mantel and grinning like he was watching a new episode of reality TV and not Noah’s life going up in flames.
He shot his friend a dark look, then glanced back at his dad. “And what’s he doing here again?”
“Son, I know this probably comes as a shock to you—” his dad started before Noah cut him off.
“You think?” Jaw tight, he sat back in his chair and crossed his arms. He had no intention of letting this guy in again. He’d made that mistake as a kid and been heartbroken when his dad had walked out on him and his mom when he was thirteen. And sure, maybe his leaving had been for the best. It sure as hell had left things more peaceful around their house without all the constant bickering, but still. What kind of asshole just walks out on their kid without a word for years? Nope. His mom might have forgiven the bastard, but Noah wasn’t there yet. Not by a long shot. “How’d you get to Atlanta?”
“We flew out of O’Hare last night,” his mother said. She still lived in the house he’d grown up in, in Gurney, Illinois, just outside the city. “Your father and I rented a place out on Tybee Island for the week, but thought we’d make a stop off here in Atlanta first, once I found out where you were, and who was with you. I couldn’t pass up the chance to meet my grandbaby in person.”
At the reminder of Gracie, a bit of his fierce bravado weakened. Crap. Given how things stood between him and Serena, now was not the optimal time to be showing off their baby to anyone. Not only were things tense between them, but given how close he’d always been with his mother, she’d see his true feelings for Serena and Gracie written all over his face.
