Grant lifted her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “I’m going to head out. Get some rest, okay?”
She pulled their clasped hands to her. “Wait. You can’t say all that then just leave.”
His gaze was focused on her face. She was fairly certain there wasn’t an eyelash he didn’t have memorized at this point.
“Half hour’s almost up,” he said.
She set her glass on top of the nightstand and glared at him. “I never agreed to that arbitrary time limit.”
“Button.” He barked a laugh that had no humor in it. “I’m trying here...”
“And I hear that.” She cradled his hand in both of hers now. How did she begin to put all her feelings into words? How did they edge past this? What could she say that wasn’t I’m sorry, I love you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you?
She had nothing.
Both she and Grant, they were people of action. They did things. Which was how they’d wound up falling into bed in the first place, which eventually brought them to this moment.
Screw it.
Or more accurately, him.
She took his glass from him, set it next to hers then crawled onto his lap. His arms wrapped around her, settling her more comfortably on his thighs without complaint. Not that she truly expected to get one from him.
This was where she wanted to be. Where she was meant to be.
Deep down she knew she was a goner. Even the tiniest bit of effort on his part would win her over. Face wash and pajamas? This was just nails in her proverbial coffin.
Grant owned her heart. Whatever chance she’d had to get out of this relationship was gone. She loved him, and if he was serious, if he meant what he said about being better for them, she’d love him the rest of her life.
He leaned forward and kissed her forehead while his hands stroked her back and shoulders.
“You’ve wound up on my lap a few times lately,” he said against her skin.
She tipped her chin up and smiled. “I know I have your attention this way.”
His fingers trailed down her arm to her elbow. “You always have my attention. It’s everything else I struggle with.”
Melody swallowed, lost in his eyes. She couldn’t remember a time before when there was so much emotion in them. It wasn’t like Grant to be this open, this vulnerable.
Had she ever given him the chance?
Neither of them were innocent when it came to the last year of mistakes. The proof was staring at her now. If she’d have asked for more, he’d have given it to her.
Melody leaned in, pressing her lips to his, drinking in his kiss. His grip on her tightened and she felt his body stir.
“This was not my plan,” he muttered and lifted his face from hers. “I want to show you we have more than sex.”
“I know, and it’s a nice plan, but I think this is better.” She pulled him back down for a deep kiss. “This is one thing we do well, and...I need you, Grant.”
His lips quirked up. “How can I say no to that?”
“I’m hoping you don’t say no.”
She hooked her finger in the V of his button-down shirt and slid the first one free. Normally he’d wear an undershirt. Grant was that kind of guy, put together, orderly. But he’d had to take what he could get in terms of their disguises.
She kind of liked being the only one who knew what was under his shirt.
The first bit of his tattoo became visible. She smiled, even though her heart hurt for his loss. It meant more that he’d shared that story with her.
Melody leaned forward and kissed the point where his collarbone and sternum met, just above the first ink.
“I really like you in a dress shirt. It’s hot. Have I ever told you that?”
“Now you want me for my body?” he said completely serious.
Melody couldn’t help but laugh. Grant wasn’t one to make jokes. He also wasn’t the kind of man who yielded control. But he was—could—change. He was right, deep down he was still the same guy. She didn’t expect him to become someone else, she wouldn’t want that.
This gave her hope for their future, for what came next.
One by one she unbuttoned his shirt until he had to pull it from his very tented slacks.
He shrugged out of the shirt while she traced the words again.
Laugh Now, Cry Later.
Melody wanted to enjoy what they had, to savor it. There would be time to sort out the messier details in their own time, when they weren’t picking up the pieces from nearly dying. But for now, she wanted this man, to love him, to be with him.
Grant’s hands dug into her hair, curling around the strands and holding tight. Just the way she liked. She sighed and her lids drooped.
He didn’t go for her mouth, no, he kissed up her neck to her jaw then across her face. But not her lips. He trailed kisses down the other side of her neck. Goose flesh broke out on her arms and her nipples puckered.
Melody closed her eyes and gave in, focusing on the feel of his hand in her hair, the one at her back, his lips and breath on her skin.
Intense was the word she’d used to best describe Grant. Everything about him was intense, from the way he worked to how he made love. That was why it had to be all or nothing with him. There were no half measures, no in-betweens. Which was why, deep down, she hoped this worked, that he was truly serious.
He let go of her, but only to tug her shirt up and over her head, leaving her in the much abused bra she’d been wearing for the last few days.
“This has got to go,” Grant muttered.
She couldn’t agree more.
He released the catch and she shrugged out of it, letting it fall to the floor.
“You’re perfect, you know that?” he whispered.
“Now that’s a lie.” She wound her arms around his neck and smiled. “If I were perfect, don’t you think we’d be in a better place?”
“Sh.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “You’re perfect. No arguing with me.”
She smirked. “Yes, sir.”
“Hey.” He tweaked a nipple.
She gasped and her vision hazed, her toes curled and dampness soaked her panties. He kept the tortured flesh in his grasp and added the gentle swipe of his thumb back and forth.
“Oh—Grant,” she whispered.
“Hm.”
The next thing she knew his tongue was swirling around her other breast, all while his thumb kept up that back-and-forth action. The two different sensations vied for her attention.
“God,” she muttered.
Grant turned, taking her with him and laid her on the mattress, her legs draped across his lap. She sucked down air, watching him through her lashes as his hand slid down her chest and stomach.
He sat there, studying her in a way he knew well.
He was making his battle plan.
She’d surrender now, except it was more fun this way. The only area in their relationship where she’d felt as if she had his full attention, as though he were really dialed in, was sex.
What would happen when and if he approached the rest of their relationship like this?
Melody hoped he meant it, because she could see herself happy with him.
Grant shifted out from under her legs to his knees, hands braced by her hips. Again he bent and kissed her stomach, down to the waistband of her yoga pants. He glanced up, their gazes locking for a moment and she stopped breathing.
She loved this man. Under all the gruffness, he had a heart of gold.
His fingers hooked in the waistband of her pants, tugging them down a bit. He pressed a kiss to the newly exposed skin and then another. He pealed her panties and pants off her, his lips worshiping her skin as it was revealed, as if he’d never seen her naked before.
The way Grant looked at her, how he kissed and touched her, always made her feel beautiful.
He sat back on his heels at the foot of the bed looking up her body.
Her heart strained against her ri
bs, swelling too big for her body. Because of him.
Grant leaned forward, sliding a knee between her calves. The other forced her legs apart.
“Missed a spot,” he said.
Heat swept through her a moment before he ducked his head and planted a kiss against her folds. Her body was already pulsing with need. That touch, it was just too much.
She lifted her hips, shifting away from him, but he braced his forearm across her abdomen while his tongue delved into her.
“Fuck,” she groaned.
Her hands clutched at the blanket and her legs shifted restlessly.
His fingers joined his tongue as he thrust into her.
Melody reached down, but his hair was too short to get a good grip on and he’d taken off his shirt. Her hands moved restlessly over him, unable to get a hold.
His deft fingers circled her clit. He knew her body too well.
She panted his name, coherent thought fading away. All she was aware of was the rushing sensation, as though she were standing in the surf and a great, big wave was bearing down on her.
The pleasure hit her, tightening her body. Her spine bowed up off the bed and her thighs clenched around his shoulders. Her hand tightened on the back of his head, holding him to her pussy as the orgasm shuddered through her.
She hissed and moaned at the attentions of his tongue and fingers, drawing the climax out, wringing every bit of pleasure from her.
And it wasn’t enough. It didn’t satisfy her need for him.
Melody’s limbs were jelly, but she reached down deep inside herself and found the strength to push Grant away then sit up. She might have wobbled a bit, but she was focused on her task.
Grant sat back on his heels, his erection straining at the front of his slacks now.
She crawled toward him and ran her fingers down the hard line. He sucked in a breath at her touch, proving that it wasn’t just her. He was affected, too.
Melody undid his belt and the button, causing the slacks to sag on his hips. She didn’t bother with the zipper, just slid her hand inside and touched his hot flesh.
“Christ,” he groaned.
“Exactly.” She chuckled. “Grant, I want you naked. Now.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
He climbed off the bed. Gravity did most of the work, robbing him of the pants while he pushed his underwear down, toed off his shoes and lost the socks.
She sighed, taking in the sight of him. He was all lean, hard muscle, scars—and those shoulders. Some days she thought he literally carried the weight of the world on them. She knew most people never got past his resting sour face, most never realized that what caused that was a heart that didn’t stop. He cared.
Grant crawled back up on the bed toward her. She grabbed his hand and laid back, pulling him on top of her. Right now she wanted his weight, to feel him all around her.
He settled against her, their bodies fitting together perfectly. He braced himself on his elbows, staring down at her.
She loved him with her whole heart, her body, everything.
“You’re special, you know that?” he muttered.
Melody sighed and wrapped her arms around him.
“There isn’t anyone else like you.” He dipped his head and kissed one corner of her mouth, then the other, and finally her lips. “I’m sorry I didn’t say that enough.”
She shook her head. “Don’t. Don’t say that. If we’re going to move forward, if we’re going to do better, I don’t want to waste time apologizing about the past. I just want to live in the present.” With him.
He kissed the tip of her nose. “Okay.”
“Now, sir?” She arched her hips. “I want something else.”
“Do you now?”
“Yes.” She grinned up at him.
He paused, lips parted.
“What?” she asked.
“Last time... Condoms...”
She shook her head. “I just want you.”
The fire in his gaze burned brighter.
This was their new chapter, a real beginning.
Grant reached between them and the next thing she felt was the head of his cock sliding between her folds.
“Is this what you want?” he asked with a rare, sexy smile.
“Yes.”
She tightened her leg around him as he flexed his hips and slid into her.
Skin to skin.
There was nothing between them anymore.
Grant pressed his forehead to hers, holding her tight to him. It was her turn to kiss his cheek then the tip of his nose and lips.
Somehow they’d found each other. They were each that one person the other didn’t have to be strong for. They could share the burden, their fears, wants and desires. She’d felt like he as her future months ago, and she’d nearly ruined that.
There was only one more secret she was holding back.
Her throat dried up.
She should tell him the truth, that she was hopelessly in love with him.
Grant’s hips moved, rocking into her and once more her brain went mushy and all she could do was feel. The depth of her love for him only made this, the joining of their bodies, more intense. What they had now was a world away from what they’d had that first time.
“God, Mel. You feel so fucking good.” Grant buried his face in her neck, his powerful body moving over her.
She couldn’t speak, so she just held onto him. Her nerve endings were still afire with sensation, making the pleasure of this skin to skin joining that much better.
Melody turned her head, finding Grant’s gaze on her.
She opened her mouth and before she could say anything, her second orgasm ripped through her. She was vaguely aware of Grant’s shout of pleasure, the way his body tightened and curled around hers. More than anything she knew she wanted to do this again and again with him. Ideally in a much larger bed, but that could be arranged.
Grant recovered first, taking a turn in the bathroom before she got her boneless body to cooperate. She shuffled into the miniscule bathroom after he was done, pausing when she saw the skin care products on the counter.
Her heart was going to break her ribs at this point.
Very soon she wanted to take that next step, to tell him she loved him. But maybe not tonight.
She spent a moment washing her face and using the other products before opening the door.
Grant was once more wearing his boxers. He had the pajamas he’d bought her in hand and his knife, removing all the tags.
She had to brace her hand on the doorframe to steady herself and give her knees a little pep talk.
“Thought you might want to wear these.” He held out the top.
“I do.” She took the spaghetti strap top and slid it over her head. The silky material felt good on her skin, still too sensitive from orgasm.
He sat on the edge of the bed and held the shorts out for her to step into. It wasn’t like him to go this far, to do this much, but a part of her liked it. Maybe even needed that extra bit of care.
When she was dressed, he wrapped his arms around her then rolled them both onto the narrow bed. She chuckled and snuggled closer.
“Will you stay?” she asked before she could think better of the request.
“Are you sure about that?” he asked slowly.
Until the other night, they’d always slept separately while working. It wasn’t uncommon for the guys to rouse Grant in the middle of the night due to an emergency. They’d been focused on keeping work and private separate maybe that needed to change too?
“Yeah, I want you here,” she said.
“Then you’ve got me. At least until I get booted onto the floor.” He glanced over his shoulder.
“You will not.” She tightened her grip on his waist. “I’ve got you.”
13.
Sunday. Aegis Group Headquarters, Chicago, Illinois.
Grant could remember his first time being led through the main building housing the original Aegis Group offic
es. He’d angled for an invitation since the day he’d been forced out of the SEALs. Since he wasn’t ready to be done with the type of work that involved high-risk situations he’d been pleased to get the referral to the company. There were plenty of companies that had set up shop in the last few decades, but they weren’t all equal. Aegis Group was one of the best.
It had been the right call for him, even now all these years later. Only, it was better because he had Melody.
She sank into the wooden chair next to him as they settled in to wait for Admiral Crawford to see them.
“I thought I heard that he was retiring for good,” Melody said under her breath.
Grant didn’t reply immediately. Two people walked out of the office, their heads together, expressions serious.
“I think the news of his retirement is premature,” he said.
She shrugged. Being on the team meant they operated apart from the rest of the organization, in their own little bubble. Half the time Grant had no idea what everyone else was doing. His team was his world.
The amount of traffic in and out of Crawford’s office was intense though. In the few moments they’d been in the office they’d seen one the leader of Omega Team and two different groups cycle in and out. Most of them were completely unknown to Grant, but he caught their energy. The place buzzed with it. Something was going down and Grant had to wonder if it had anything to do with what they’d just gone through.
A tall man with a ruddy complexion and thick black hair that hung to his jaw paused in front of them. “Grant, Melody? Hi, nice to see you.”
The man held out his hand.
“Marco,” Grant said as the name sprang to mind. He’d only met the guy a few times. “It’s been a while.”
Melody stood and offered Marco her hand. “Marco, is it? I’m not sure we’ve met.”
“Maybe not?” Marco let go of Grant’s hand and took hers. Marco’s gaze was sharp, full of meaning. “I’m Marco Benally. My friend helped get your team home from that little incident in Beirut.”
This was the contact? The one who’d made magic happen?
The pieces were starting to click. Everything was beginning to make sense.
This morning wasn’t about a debrief. Grant had expected to meet with the higher up’s, talk about what went wrong, get a little pep talk then be sent on home. Involving Crawford had seemed like an extreme measure, but Grant wasn’t going to second guess the top brass’ call.
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