Full Throttle

by LaShawn Vasser

  “They are at the garage and would like to have a word with the team.”

  “I’ll be there.”

  It didn’t take long to drive over to the garage and pull the car inside. She was the last to arrive. She got out of the car and glanced around the room. All she saw were familiar faces. She leaned over and whispered into Gonzo’s ear, “Where’s the new sponsor?”

  He shrugged. “Dunno. I just got a call from Brian, telling me to call everyone over to meet the new sponsor.”

  “Where the hell is he?”

  “Dunno that either.”

  They all stood around waiting. Finally, Brian and Liam emerged from their offices and walked down the stairs toward the group.

  They were smiling from ear to ear. Brain clapped his hands together. “I know it’s been a stressful few days, but I think we can finally share some good news. I’ve been working my ass off trying to find a sponsor for Lockwood Racing, and today, I can say we got one. A sponsor that will carry us through the entire NASCAR season.”

  Ben was impatient. “Who is it?”

  “Lockwood Enterprises,” Brian said.

  “Liam?” Colby asked.

  Liam turned his gaze toward her, and like clockwork, her knees turned to jelly. To prevent herself from melting into a puddle on the floor, Colby shifted her eyes to the floor.

  Liam continued to explain. “It’s not me personally, but several of my businesses will sponsor Lockwood Racing. Brian and I had a few logistics to work out before we made the announcement.” Colby had no idea that Liam was sponsoring Lockwood just as much to help Brian as it was to help her. “That’s not our only surprise.”

  “There’s more?” Gonzo asked.

  “Yes. There is more,” Brian said proudly. One of the doors to the dock opened to reveal two large trucks. “Thanks to our new sponsor, I’ve been informed that there are some top of the line parts on those trucks. I believe everything that was on Cyrus’ wish list is in there.”

  The garage erupted into more whoops and hollers. “And the absolute cherry on top is that I have several auto body artists arriving tomorrow. I think it’s time to give our cars some makeovers, so when we arrive in Atlanta, they’ll know Lockwood Racing is in the building!”

  Chapter 22

  Atlanta. They’d finally made it.

  “It’s crazy, huh?” Brian asked excitedly to Colby as they rode in the back of the car together.

  “What in the world?” Colby couldn’t believe it either. There were hordes of reporters in front of the hotel. The flash of their cameras was so bright that Colby couldn’t see a damn thing. She had to put on a pair of dark glasses to shield her eyes.

  It had only been a matter of hours after the video of Colby beating Asher that her name was splashed all over the blogs, sports tv, and radio networks. Everyone wanted the exclusive. They wanted to know who she was and what she thought about being the first African American woman to drive in a major NASCAR race. If they only knew.

  “Asher is going to shit bricks when he sees all the attention you’re getting. Who would have ever thought?”

  “Exactly. Who would have ever thought?” Colby said dryly as she mimicked him.

  It was time to have a much needed and uncomfortable conversation. Brian had avoided it long enough. “I asked if you would ride with me to the hotel because I wanted to talk to you privately.” They pulled up into the parking structure of the hotel—no more flashing lights.

  Colby knew this moment with Brian was coming. She was glad to be wearing the dark glasses because her eyes would give too much away.

  Brian’s voice softened. “I hope you know that Liam did all of this for you.”

  Colby sat very still. Her heart rate accelerated. “W-what? What are you talking about?”

  “He sponsored Lockwood Racing for you. I know all about you and him.”

  If Brian knew, Colby wondered who else knew. Was she about to be exposed? Was Brian going to fire her? Colby wanted to walk away on her own terms. She didn’t want to be run out and shamed for sleeping with Liam. As the seconds of silence ticked by, Colby could not breathe, waiting for the shoe to drop.

  Brian surprised her.

  “Contrary to what you might believe, Liam wasn’t toying around with you. As a matter-of-fact, I’ve been watching him do something I’ve never seen before.”

  Brian wasn’t firing her? She didn’t know what was going on. Colby managed to find her voice. It came out in a broken whisper. “What?”

  “He’s falling in love. I’m almost positive he doesn’t know what to do with those feelings. He’s not good at this kind of thing. Give him a spreadsheet or a project and the man’s a genius. Talk to him about people and feelings, and he’s like a brand-new baby.”

  Colby remained silent. She didn’t know what to do with what Brian just revealed. Why hadn’t Liam told her that himself?

  “There is a lot on the line for all of us. Lockwood Racing didn’t make it to Atlanta just because of me, but because of Liam. He knows how much all of this means to you and your friends.”

  “I’m just trying to be a team player. If window dressing for Lockwood is what’s needed then, I’ll do it. This time.”

  “I promise you’ll be behind the wheel in a few weeks and most likely for the rest of the season. We are going to use all of the hoopla from this race to prepare the press for your coming out, so to speak.”

  Ha! Colby thought. I’ll be in Washington living my best life. “Look, I know you’ve invested a lot of money, but—”

  “It’s not just money.” Brian exhaled. “What I am about to tell you can’t be repeated ever, and if somehow it is, I will deny it. This stays between us?”

  Colby was hesitant, then slowly lowered her glasses to see Brian’s face more clearly. “Okay.”

  “I’m guessing you did your internet research just like we did.”

  “No. Liam hired someone to investigate me. That’s different,” Colby said.

  Brian gave Colby a little shrug. “He’s Liam,” he said as if that explained everything. “The bottom line is your assumptions about me were probably right on the money. I’m a fuck up. Liam has been saving my ass since I was old enough to walk. Buying into this team was his version of helping to save my ass again.”

  Colby was even more confused. “I-I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”

  “It’ll become all too clear in a minute.” Nervously, Brian slid his hands up and down his jeans. “I have some bad blood with this guy. One night after way too many drinks, I entered into a stupid bet with him. I bet my car could beat his in a NASCAR race. At the time, I didn’t even own a car or a team. However, if I lost, I would have to give up all of my shares to my family’s company.”

  “Are you serious?” Colby was in disbelief.

  “Dead serious.”

  “Why in God’s name would you do something like that?”

  “This may seem like rich people problems to you, but here’s the rub. The man I entered into the bet with is a member of a notorious crime family. He’s the motivation behind most of my stupid decisions. I would never have bet the shares to my family’s company if I were sober. The problem is if I back out of our bet, the people I love the most could be harmed or worse. If I lose, this crime family would finally get their tentacles into Lockwood. Apparently, there has been an ongoing battle between our families for years.”

  “Why do they want it so bad?” Colby asked.

  “I suspect to launder money, but more than likely, it all boils down to a hatred for all things Lockwood. The last part, I don’t quite understand because I used to be the best of friends with the guy until he slept with my girlfriend.”

  Colby froze. “Wait? Who are we talking about?”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  “No.” She shook her head. “It matters. Please tell me.”

  “You wouldn’t know him.” Brian thought about it. “I don’t know. Maybe you would. His name is Anthony Luccesse.” />
  Colby placed her hand over her chest. “Dear God. Brian . . .”

  “Apparently, you do know him. I forgot you and Lila are family, and they dated.”

  She knew his name sounded familiar. He was the other potential buyer her father had told her about. But more importantly, he was the man who used her cousin as collateral damage. “Lila never dated him! He ruined her life!”

  “Colby, I don’t know what Lila told you, but I saw her with Anthony with my own eyes.”

  “No, what you saw was a disgusting piece of shit who drugged Lila and set it up to look like they’d slept together to one-up you.”

  “What?” Brian couldn’t believe it. “That can’t be true.”

  “Yes! He drugged Lila.” Colby was filled with rage. She wanted to kill the bastard with her own two hands. “Lila’s been messed up ever since.”

  Brian paled. He looked like a ghost. “If that were true, why wouldn’t she tell me?!”

  “Did you give her a chance?”

  It was painful, but Brian thought back to that day. The answer was no. He hadn’t given Lila a chance. He was so blinded by rage and jealousy that he’d packed her stuff up and left it out in the hallway. “No,” he said softly.

  “On the outside, Lila may seem like she has it all together, but she has always been a bit insecure. Being at that ridiculously exclusive private college didn’t help. She was the lone black girl attending on a scholarship, doing a work-study program, and having to pinch pennies while hanging out with all of you rich kids, rubbing your wealth in her face. It was hard for her. I know exactly how she felt because I was in her same shoes when I went away to college.”

  Brian sat back in his seat in a state of shock. His head fell back as he squeezed his eyes shut. He seemed to be speaking mostly to himself because Colby could barely hear him. “Lila’s the only woman I’ve ever loved.”

  It was hard, but she heard him. Colby could see the hurt all over him. As angry as she was with seemingly everyone, Colby wasn’t heartless. She felt sadness for Lila and Brian’s situation. Maybe in revealing the truth, some good could come out of this godforsaken situation.

  Colby sighed as a little more anger left her body. “Brian, if I had to guess, I think she might still have some really strong feelings for you.”

  Brian heard her but didn’t say a word. He couldn’t say anything because he was too overcome with emotions.

  They sat parked in the private entrance of the garage; both lost in their own thoughts.

  “I should go. The last thing I need is for the press to see me sitting in the car with you. They’ll think we’re sleeping together.” Colby moved to open her door, which spurred the driver and the concierge into action.

  Brian raised his head and placed his hand over hers. “Wait.” He held her gaze. “I know this entire situation isn’t fair to you.”

  “No, it’s not.” Colby didn’t hold her tongue.

  “You should probably hate all of us.”

  I think I do, she thought.

  “But, please, don’t count Liam out.”

  Liam and Colby’s nonexistent relationship was a completely different matter, unlike Lila and Brian. Colby smiled sadly. “How about you don’t count Lila out.” There. She’d done her one good deed for the day. Now, she could go back to hating the world. Colby got out of the car and walked into the hotel.

  Brian sat alone for a few more minutes. He honestly didn’t know what to do with Colby’s bombshell revelation. What Brian did know was that Liam was in serious trouble. Brian had worked hard for years to get Lila out of his system and hadn’t succeeded yet. He had a feeling that if Liam didn’t fix things with Colby, he might suffer the same fate.

  Brian murmured as he got out of the car, “Something about those James’ girls is magical.”

  Chapter 23

  Colby was just finishing unpacking her things when there was a knock at the door. Barefoot, she padded over and looked through the peephole. It was good to see a familiar face. She smiled as she opened the door. “Gonzo.”

  He returned her smile with one of his own. “In the flesh.”

  Colby stepped aside so that he could come in.

  “Everybody’s meeting at the restaurant at six o’clock. Figured I’d walk down with you.”

  Colby rolled her eyes. “I was thinking about skipping it.”

  “Colby, what’s up? This time I want the truth.”

  “What are you talking about?” She couldn’t maintain eye contact. She went over to the closet and turned her back to him. She made a big fuss as if trying to figure out what she was going to wear, which was silly if she didn’t plan on going to dinner.

  Unfortunately, Gonzo wouldn’t let up. He continued to push for answers. “All of your dreams are about to come true. Yet, you don’t seem excited at all. I’ve known you my whole life. I know something’s not right.”

  “I already told you the media attention is driving me nuts. How would you like it if people were digging into your private life and your face were plastered all across the blogs?”

  “I would love every second of it if it meant everything that I’ve ever wanted was right there for the taking.” Gonzo shook his head. “No. That’s not it. You’ve prepared for this moment since before you could barely walk. You should be bursting with excitement, and you’re the exact opposite of that, but pretending to be. If I had to pinpoint a date and time you started acting strange, I would say it went all the way back to that first meeting after the video leaked. Now, what’s up? No bullshit.”

  Colby was on the verge of a breakdown. If she didn’t share her situation with someone, she was going to lose it. “I messed up.”

  Gonzo tried to console her. “Whatever you did can’t be that bad.”

  “Hear me out first,” she whispered.

  Gonzo took a seat on the edge of Colby’s bed. She sat down next to him.

  “I’m not driving this race, and I probably won’t ever drive for Lockwood.”

  “What are you talking about? You are on the schedule. You’ve been practicing with the team—”

  “I slept with Liam.”

  Her words instantly shut him up.

  “On purpose?” Gonzo asked.

  He was so sincere that Colby almost laughed hysterically. “Um . . . yeah. While I’m pretty sure sleeping with him was a terrible decision, it wasn’t an accident.”

  “So, are you into him? Is he into you?”

  Gonzo was so sweet. He had no idea how his words sounded. Her honest answer would have been we were very into each other, and my body rages every time we’re in the same damn room. But Colby decided to keep that information to herself. “Honestly, it’s confusing. I should hate them both since they played me.”

  “Okay, now I am really confused.”

  “I’m here as window dressing. I’m not driving.”

  “Brian said you were.”

  “People say a lot of things. Doesn’t mean it’s true. Lockwood Racing only loaded up three cars. Asher, Chris, and Jordan are driving.”

  “Asher is not here and hasn’t been to any of our practice runs.”

  “Asher is Lockwood’s lead driver for this race.” Hurt and exhaustion from having to prove her worth wore on Colby’s resolve. “Lockwood needs a win. They believe Asher is the one who will give it to them, not me.” It hurt that Liam didn’t have faith in her. “He slept with me knowing that I thought I’d earned that spot! He knew I was not going to drive in this race. Honestly, I just don’t think I can go down to that restaurant and put on this dog and pony show.”

  “Do you have feelings for Liam?” Gonzo asked quietly.

  Colby lowered her head and clasped her hands together. She stared at the floor. “I don’t want to, and I don’t understand why after his betrayal. It happened so fast,” Colby hesitated, “but yeah, I do.” She stood and balled her fists up at her side. “Ugh! I hate this. How I feel about Liam is neither here nor there. I only came on this trip because of you, the gu
ys, and my dad. I’m here to support y’all. There’s something else.”

  “God, what now?” he asked.

  “I haven’t told anyone yet, but when this is over, I’m moving back to Washington.”

  “Colby!” Gonzo stood up forcefully. “Not driving in the Atlanta race is a disappointment, but you’re still on the verge of making history! Imagine what this will mean for little black girls and women of color all over the world. I know that your pride is hurt because you feel betrayed by Brian and Liam, but you’ve got to shake that shit off.”

  “I’m just over it, Gonzo.” Colby was tired. “I’ve been carrying this weight for so long. It’s so damn heavy.”

  “Then lean on me. We’ve got you.” Gonzo pulled Colby into a bear hug. He held her for a long time. After a while, he asked, “You good?”

  His shirt was soaked. “I just ruined your clothes with my makeup,” Colby said.

  “Yeah, eyebrows and mascara are everywhere.” He laughed. “Go fix your face, put some clothes on, and let’s go eat.” He gave her a compassionate smile and a gentle push. “I’m starving.”

  Colby wasn’t in any mood to eat, but Gonzo made some valid points. He was right. She would do her best to enjoy the moment, if not for herself, for her friends.

  She would deal with the rest later.

  *****

  By the time Colby and Gonzo arrived, most everyone was already seated around the table of the hotel restaurant. It wasn’t surprising when she didn’t see Asher. Colby was both surprised and relieved when she didn’t see Liam either.

  As a matter-of-fact, she hadn’t seen him at all. Was he here? Surely, he wouldn’t miss this race. It was too important.

  After more than an hour of trash talk and banter with her friends, the restaurant brought out dinner.

  Colby finally relaxed because it was obvious that Liam wasn’t coming. She fully joined in the festivities. It was impossible not to feel the joy in the room as they ate and drank. The energy was contagious. She was glad Gonzo forced her to come. Ben shouted at her from the opposite end of the long dinner table. “So, Colby, how does it feel to have all these reporters eating out of the palm of your hands?”