by Jarica James
The guy working behind the counter appears to be in his twenties and seems super laid-back. I put my CDs next to the cash register, and he gives me a customer service smile before adding up my purchases. The number rises slowly and I’m actually pleasantly surprised to see how cheap it all is.
“Oh, I love this band. They were way better before the lead singer quit, but their new stuff isn’t that bad, right?” he asks, trying to chat with me.
I do my usual smile and nod technique, but the facts he keeps rattling off are fairly interesting. I’m impressed with his knowledge of the random bands I’d chosen. Even working in a music store you don’t expect the workers to know every band, and I have my doubts that punk is his usual genre of choice, if his One Direction shirt is anything to go off of.
After handing him my card and signing the receipt, he gives me another smile but seems confused why I’m not talking back.
“Are you new to the area?” His eyebrows raise as he tries again. Knowing if I don’t sign he’ll just be either annoyed or hurt, I quickly sign a response.
‘Yes, just moved yesterday.’
“Uh, I’m sorry,” he says, frowning and his cheeks tinting pink. He doesn’t understand sign language enough for me to explain that I can hear just fine and to not worry, so I just give a quick wave before walking out.
The interaction took a bit of the wind out of my sails, reminding me that despite new clothes and people not knowing me, that I didn’t have a high chance of making friends. This is the exact reason I generally run at the first sign of real conversation. It’s who I am now. A survival technique if you will, and it’s a hell of a lot better than just staring at them blankly.
Maybe the new school will learn quickly I’m mute and not be dicks about it. I could use a bit less bullying than I got before. After everything, I didn’t care what they thought about me. Really I just didn’t care about anything in general. But that didn’t stop them from being assholes and their words would get to me regardless.
Not far from the music store, I find a cute little bookshop and decide to stop in and see what they have. I love reading paranormal books and the occasional horror. It’s my escape from reality and if they creep me out, then I love them even more.
You would think with my past I would avoid it, but I never could resist a creepy ghost story. Walking straight for the paranormal section, I scan the familiar titles. Nothing new jumps out at me until I find a small book on the haunted history of Arcadia Hills.
Of course, I have to suffer through an awkward transaction with the nice old lady who works behind the counter. She gets flustered when I don’t speak and then gives me the sad eyes when I sign my ‘thank you’ to her. Her pity makes my skin crawl and I hurry away before it can get worse.
As I make my way out of the store, my stomach growls so loudly that someone walking past chuckles. Blushing, I check my phone and realize all of my nerdy browsing kept me occupied for a good couple of hours, and it’s already past noon.
Glancing up and down the street, I look around at my food options. There’s a choice of either bar and grills, pizza, or a diner. Of course, I choose pizza since I can’t resist the cheesy perfection. I’ve survived on subpar family meals and cafeteria food for way too long.
The restaurant isn't the usual pizza place, it’s a purchase by the slice restaurant. The heated displays show every style of pizza I can think of and my nose crinkles at the fresh ham and pineapple one she slides into place. Despite that monstrosity, the rest looks so good I know it will take me forever to pick. Thankfully nobody is behind me and a girl is still choosing her food in front of me, so I have a moment to think.
“Can I help you?” the bored teenager behind the counter asks when it’s my turn. I point out the pepperoni pizza and hold up two fingers with a smile. He gives me a look that clearly says he thinks I’m being rude. I fight back my natural urge to roll my eyes. The audacity of people my age is ridiculous. “Pepperoni? Two pieces?” he asks to make sure. I nod and walk up to the cash register to avoid staring at him awkwardly.
I noticed the girl in front had paid before they gave her the tray, which helps ease my nerves a bit. My heart stops as I take in the pretty smile she throws my way, her blue eyes shining as she gives me a curious look before walking away. She’s breathtaking and I can’t even help the slow scan my eyes do as I check her out. My brain stutters for a moment and I don’t snap out of it until the guy behind the counter clears his throat. Smooth, Charlie.
Not meeting the cashier’s eyes, I quickly pay for my pizza and search for a seat. It isn’t overly crowded, so I find a small table by the window and quickly claim it as my own. The lighting in here isn’t the best and I’m ready to crack into my new book.
The girl that was in front of me in line sits a few tables over with a small group. At least the few people my age that I have seen seem fairly friendly, with the exception of the pizza boy. I’ll go ahead and take that as a positive sign. Fake it till I make it and all that.
I pull out my new book and quickly immerse myself in a local legend about the haunted library and I make a mental note to check out the library next. My last home had a few younger kids, so I usually opted for the city library for homework time. Sophia’s house might be the opposite and it’s too quiet to keep me focused. There’s something about studying among all the books that makes it more effective, so the library would be the smarter choice even if I have to study with ghosts.
“Are you new in town? Will you be starting at the high school, or are you private or home schooled?” I look up at the girl from earlier, my eyes going wide. She seems genuinely curious and for the first time in three years I wish I could speak. She has long blonde hair that’s a few shades lighter than mine. It cascades over her shoulders in beach waves. She’s slender but curvy and dresses simply in jeans, a plain pink T-shirt, and flats.
She seems safe enough, but I hesitate for a moment before I give her a smile and pull out my phone, quickly opening the notepad and typing in that I would be going to the high school. When I turn the screen around, I catch a hurt look on her face. She probably thought I was being rude or openly shutting her down. That’d be a cold day in hell.
I sign ‘sorry’ to her with a small sigh. Her eyes go wide as the realization sinks in, and she recovers by leaning forward to read the message I’m holding out for her.
“You mind if I sit down for a second?” she asks politely, and I know I look shocked. Most people run away fast when they realize we can’t talk back and forth. But I have a feeling she’s going to keep on surprising me.
“My name is Abby. You are?” she asks and waits patiently while I type my answer out and show it to her. “I love the name Charlie!” She clasps her hands in front of her and smiles. “Short for Charlotte?” I nod and she beams, her smile dazing me each time it’s aimed my way. She’s even more attractive because she’s so freaking nice.
“What grade are you in?” She actually squeals when I show her my answer. “Me too! Hopefully we have a few classes together. I’m not really a genius or anything, but I can help you do any catch up that you need! Hell, if I can’t then my friends can.” This time it’s my turn to smile and she returns it easily, the silence not even awkward.
Abby takes out her cell phone and indicates she wants mine. I hand it over, and she quickly does something before giving it back. Glancing down, I notice she added her phone number. She pushes her phone toward me and indicates she wants mine. I add my new number into her phone and try to not freak out. She actually seems genuine and friendly and it’s been too fucking long being on my own. I know my social skills are stunted and I really don’t want to mess this up.
I have an internal battle of not wanting to be close to anyone, and being so lonely I can’t function. We just met, so I push all of that aside and decide to just see where this goes. She’ll get tired of the no talking soon enough, and I’ll be alone again, no point in freaking out prematurely.
“I’ll let you ge
t back to your lunch and book. I’ll text you later if that’s ok?” She fidgets with a strand of pale hair and The nervous action surprises me, she seems so damn confident, but I quickly nod. “Awesome. It was nice to meet you, Charlie! The whole senior class shares a lunch period, so if we don’t end up with any classes then find me at lunch. I’ll wait by the fountain in front of the cafeteria for you!” She gives me a quick wave and walks off.
Opening my book, I start to read again but I can’t wipe the small smile from my face. The words all blur together and before I realize it, my food is gone and I’m just zoning out. Whoops.
Throwing away my trash and putting my tray up, I start my walk to the library. Thankfully it’s only a few more blocks away.
Just as it comes into view, my phone goes off. I pull it out and quickly realize I haven’t texted Sophia once. Shit. I wince as I check the text, expecting her to be livid and feeling awful about making her worry. Some first impression, Charlie.
Sophia: Everything ok, honey?
Me: Yes, sorry! I got caught up in the book and music stores.
Sophia: that’s ok, glad you’re having fun!
I let out a huge sigh of relief and walk the last few feet up to the library. It’s twice the size of the one back home, and quite a bit older. Two stone lion statues guard the doors and the architecture on the building itself doesn’t match the simple, modern bricks of the shopping district.
Not wanting to be a nerd and ogle the building, I walk in the revolving door and take a quick look around. It has that typical comforting library smell of books and coffee. It’s more open and airy than the old dusty one I’m used to, which is funny given the age of the place.
There are a few lines of computers and a printer on one wall, and in the middle of the room a staircase leads to a second floor loft. The second floor looks like it’s full of tables and chairs and a small coffee table. It would work perfectly for homework and no one was up there, so hopefully that means it’s usually empty.
An older man is working behind the desk. He gives me a nice greeting and I smile in return. A stack of library card forms are sitting in front of him, so I grab one and fill it out before turning it in to him. He checks it over and fills out a library card for me without questions, which I appreciate. It’s a simple card that just has my name and address printed on it. After he hands it to me, I smile again and sign ‘thank you’ to him. Instead of the usual pitying looks I get, his eyes crinkle at the corners and he smiles back.
Since I don’t actually have any homework, I decide to make my way back home, my hands starting to ache from lugging the shopping bags around. I’m still early enough that I can put my bags down and relax a bit before we leave again. In fact, I may have to change clothes and clean up a bit if the restaurant is nicer. Sophia doesn’t really seem like the burger and fries type of person.
It only takes me fifteen minutes to make my way back to Sophia’s house and I realize how lucky I am. That’ll make my life ten times easier, for sure.
When I walk inside, I don’t see her anywhere, so I head for my room. After walking for hours my feet ache, so I kick off my shoes and flop on the soft bed, nearly groaning at how good it feels.
Me: Should I dress up for dinner? I’m back btw.
Sophia: not necessary. It’s just a mall restaurant.
Sophia: Oh! Your clothes were delivered, check your closet!
At the last text, I hurry over to my closet and pull it open. Stacks of boxes are resting against the wall. Before I can start going through them, my phone dings again.
Abby: Hey! It was nice meeting you today. I’m sorry if I was a bit too enthusiastic, my friends always tell me to calm down. It’s just how I am.
My chest warms at the text, and part of me is shocked she even bothered. But I’m really glad she did. Sitting back on the bed, I text her back quickly.
Me: No worries. I appreciate you talking to me.
Abby: Oh, good! And of course, I couldn’t resist. You looked super peaceful reading, but I was too curious to resist. Plus, who wouldn’t want to talk to the cute new girl?
Now my cheeks are on fire. She really thinks I’m cute?! It’s been so damn long since I’ve even thought about dating or girls or guys, living in my own little world.
Abby: Shit… too soon, too strong? The guys are always telling me I need to use a filter, but I don’t really have one. If I got the wrong vibe, ignore me.
I apparently hesitated too long and I let out a soft chuckle, typing back before I freaked her out more.
Me: You read me right
Panic swelled in my chest. This is the first time I’ve ever admitted any feelings out loud about being bisexual and here I was telling a stranger.
Abby: Good to know
Abby: I have to go, my friend Adam is almost here. But I’ll text you soon, Sweets.
Butterflies practically exploded from their cage and swarmed in my stomach as I read that. My feelings are such a jumble I can’t even try to decipher them. After a few minutes of staring dazed at the ceiling, I force myself to get up before Sophia thinks I’ve lost it.
The boxes in my closet are practically taunting me, so I start to drag them out and rip them open so I can see everything. The mess on the bed makes me wince, paper and cardboard everywhere and clothes strewn around. three years in the foster system taught me that you keep your room tidy and don’t leave anything out, so I start to hang the clothes up and gather the trash into one of the larger boxes.
Once it’s clean I’m able to sort through what I bought. Eyeing my favorite of the new shirts, I set the deep purple shirt aside for my first day of school. Thankfully the school doesn’t have uniforms like my old one.
For tonight I take out a dark teal shirt, skinny jeans, and my new black converse, and change into them. I’ll save my leather jacket for later when the weather cools down.
By the time I’m done, it’s still early so I start to unload all of my new CDs. I pick out one of my favorites and boot up my new computer. Now in my happy place, I spend the next hour listening to music and downloading all of the discs so I can listen without the actual CD.
A quiet knock on my door has me turning around to see Sophia poking her head in before opening it the rest of the way. Instead of the pajamas she had on at breakfast, she’s now dressed more casually, in dark jeans and a pretty silk top. I’m half convinced she’d look good in everything.
“Are you ready to go soon? I’m getting a bit hungry,” she says as she rubs her stomach. I chuckle quietly, appreciating her quiet sense of humor. It lightens the mood without being over the top.
Grabbing my wallet, I follow her downstairs. She leads me through the house to a door off the side of the kitchen that I hadn’t noticed before, which leads to the garage. I take one look at her car and do an internal squeal. It’s a gorgeous, bright blue convertible bug. I’m not exactly a car buff, but it’s perfect. She gives me a wink when she notices me appreciating it.
“She’s adorable, isn’t she?” Sophia stares at her car with pride before glancing around the clean garage. “The backyard is through that door if you ever want to study or read outside. I have a pretty nice patio. There are also sliding doors in my office that lead straight to the patio. Don’t be afraid to use them either,” she explains as we get into the car. “Nothing in the house is off limits except my work.”
There would never be a reason for me to mess with her work so I just nod and climb into the car. Instead of driving in silence, she quickly puts on a pop station and sings along as we drive through town.
The mall is really busy today, which I should have realized since it’s Saturday night. When we try to get into the restaurant, the hostess says our wait will be almost an hour. Sophia seems annoyed, but probably because she’s hungry. I can’t judge. If I don’t eat regularly, I turn into a hangry bitch. She just makes a reservation for an hour and leads me farther into the mall.
“We can do some shopping after I hit up the cookie store. I’m
too hungry to wait an hour and who doesn’t love cookies?” She gives me a wink and makes a beeline for the cookie place. I practically drool as I take in the display. Their cookies are the size of my face. Whoever decided to make a business off of cookies this freaking big deserves an award.
“Can I help you, ladies?” a nice, middle aged woman asks.
“I want a chocolate chunk. Charlie, what about you?”
I point to the peanut butter cookie, and Sophia orders that for me without even missing a beat. I appreciate that she doesn’t fuss or try to make me talk like all of the other foster families. Honestly not drawing attention to it is the biggest relief. My last foster mom would have ordered for herself, and if I didn’t say what I wanted, I wouldn’t have gotten anything. I clearly didn’t cave, so she used that tactic fairly often. I think she thought I was just being a rebellious teen and didn’t care that the doctors told her how painful it is for me to speak. And it’s not even just about the pain, it’s quite a bit deeper than that.
I’m about to take a bite when my phone dings.
Abby: Adam didn’t believe me that we had a hot new girl, but I may have to let him think that so I can keep you for myself.
Abby: Anyway, what are you up to tonight?
Me: Dinner at the mall with my foster mom. You?
Abby: I hope she takes you to Dominic’s! It’s sooooo good!
Abby: It’s family game night at my house and I dragged Adam to suffer through it with me. My dad always makes these awful jokes and mom makes more food than anyone actually needs to eat in a night.
