He was reminded of how Cassius had tensed on the drive to the orphanage when he’d mentioned the playground. Merrick hoped he did not offend him. He couldn’t help wondering what Cassius’s childhood had been like. Based on how he talked about his family, he was going to guess it had been happy, though they definitely struggled to make ends meet. Merrick was glad the valet position could help provide for them better. Guilt lanced through him. Merrick should be grateful he’d never had to worry about money or employment. From a young age, he was always told what his role would be. So what if he had to sacrifice things in his life, like never experiencing the love of another man? Others had it so much worse.
Just as he wondered if Cassius had ever been in love or had a lady back home, there was a knock at the bathroom door. A moment later, Cassius said, “Your Highness, I have returned if you need my assistance.”
“You may enter,” Merrick replied, because it was customary for his valet to prepare for the evening while he bathed, but he had never been more aware of his nakedness than in that moment. Not even the water could completely shield all his wet skin on display.
Cassius averted his eyes as he entered but not before his gaze quickly took in the scene. Merrick noticed how his hair now appeared dry, but some tendrils were falling from his tie. He had also changed into a different pair of black trousers and white shirt.
“Feeling warmer, Your Highness?” Cassius asked, his gaze landing somewhere along the back wall.
“Definitely,” Merrick responded, keeping his hands in his lap beneath the waterline. “And you?”
“I am better, thank you,” Cassius answered. “As you requested, I inquired after Geoffrey, but he was not in his room. Harris informed me that he was to be put on bed rest in his family’s home so as to not infect the staff.” When Merrick raised an alarmed eyebrow, Cassius explained further. “Apparently, he’d been suffering an upper respiratory infection, his condition worsening the past few days, and was placed on antibiotics.”
“Goodness. I am glad his illness is finally being treated.” It was just like Geoffrey to ignore his symptoms in favor of duty. Merrick would instruct Cassius to send flowers and the family’s good wishes tomorrow, if his mother hadn’t already done so.
“Do you need anything else, Your Highness?” Cassius asked as he laid clean undergarments for him on the vanity. “I’ll set out your suit along with the green tartan sash.”
Merrick nodded in approval; Cassius had remembered that when dignitaries from other countries visited they were to show their Evergreen pride. The queen and princess would also wear sashes with the embroidered family crest this evening.
Just as Cassius headed to the door, Merrick realized he did not include a towel for when he finished his bath. “I am ready to dry off, lest I turn into a prune.”
“Ah, very well,” Cassius replied, turning toward the linen closet and retrieving a large bath towel. When he held it open and stepped toward the tub, Merrick hesitated. This was a perfectly normal part of the routine for him and Geoffrey.
Forcing from his brain the ridiculous notion that he had not been naked in front of a man he found attractive in ages, Merrick grasped hold of the side of the tub and stood up, the water sluicing down his torso. Though Cassius had averted his eyes, a line of crimson had formed on his cheeks, and it was as if Merrick’s body had other ideas.
He silently cursed as his prick began steadily filling with blood. Mortified, Merrick hastily grasped for the towel, taking Cassius by surprise, his fingers fumbling awkwardly as the material dropped on the floor between them.
“My apologies,” Cassius stammered, reaching down to retrieve the towel and attempting to hold it open for Merrick once more, but not before his gaze snagged on Merrick’s plump cock as it stood proudly against his abdomen.
A nearly inaudible gasp escaped Cassius’s lips, and Merrick quickly turned his back, now exposing his buttocks to the new valet. Merrick wanted a fiery pit to open in the floor so he could fall to his imminent death.
The towel was clumsily draped over his shoulders, and then he heard Cassius fleeing the room, mumbling something about prepping his suit for dinner.
Merrick absently dried himself off but felt like he was burning up from the inside.
He could not go out there and face Cassius; he just couldn’t.
Merrick changed into the undergarments Cassius had laid out for him, and then he paced around the room until he finally knocked some sense into himself. For Christ’s sake, he was an adult, let alone a prince in respectable standing, and his erection could be explained away, should it be brought up again. It’d be best to ignore the awkward exchange and move on, if they were ever to have a suitable prince-servant relationship.
Inhaling a lungful of air, Merrick cracked opened the door. Cassius, head bowed in deference, stood like a stone statue near the bed, where Merrick’s clothing was neatly organized.
No, this would not do. It would not do at all. “Cassius, I…”
“Your Highness, please…” Cassius spluttered. “No apology or explanation is necessary. This situation must be very strange for you.”
Merrick quirked an eyebrow. “Strange how?”
“Forgive me, sir,” Cassius replied, glancing in his general direction for the first time. “Due to circumstances beyond your control, you’ve been forced to replace your valet, and I cannot imagine how this feels…or maybe it is I who needs a longer adjustment period…”
“Please don’t,” Merrick commanded, finally finding his confidence. “You’ve been nothing but professional and conciliatory. The onus is on me—”
A sharp rap on the door startled them both as a footman announced, “Your Highness, the king has arrived.”
Cassius’s face paled. “We’ll be late,” he rasped.
Further conversation ceased as the valet dressed his prince at a speed neither was accustomed to. Thankfully, they made it to the front hall just in time for all members of the royal family to greet their guest.
8
Cassius
I win again. I am beginning to think my game has much improved, but I’m afraid your head just isn’t in it tonight. What is wrong?” Valor asked as they sat on Cas’s bed, playing cards.
He was right, of course. Cassius’s head wasn’t in the game, and Valor hadn’t bested him three times in a row because his skills had improved. No, no. Instead, his thoughts were in an entirely inappropriate place that could likely get him fired.
He was always aware that having such desires, though not illegal, was definitely frowned upon. But lusting after the prince of Evergreen…that was a completely different story. There was little doubt in Cassius’s mind that it was much more than frowned upon, given the prince’s status and obligation to his country.
Still, he could not keep his thoughts from straying to the prince’s bath…the way his cock had plumped. Had Cassius interrupted him masturbating? That was all he could think of to excuse the erection. Surely, the prince couldn’t have the same desires Cas did. Could he? No, he could not believe that.
“Earth to Cassius. You absolutely hate to lose. What is wrong with you?” Valor waved a hand in front of Cas’s face.
Cas rolled his eyes. “Nothing.” He picked up his cup of whiskey. Valor was quite fond of his drink, and he often brought it to Cas’s room to share with him.
“You’re that miserable, I take it? I must admit, I was nervous when you accepted the position. I know the pay is better, but I worry about you. You are… No offense, my friend, but you’re not the type I envisioned working so closely with the prince. He must drive you insane.”
White-hot anger flashed through Cas. “You don’t think I can handle it?”
Cassius finished the rest of his drink in two long, frustrated swallows. He knew he was likely being sensitive, but this was a sore spot for him. There had been quite a bit of talk around the castle about Cassius not being prepared for the job and wondering how he received it.
“Someone is gr
umpy today. You know that is not what I meant.” He reached out and ruffled Cassius’s hair as though he were a child. “You’re proving my point extremely well, though. You hate royalty, and yet you’re the prince’s valet?”
Crossing his arms, Cassius pouted. “I do not hate royalty.” He thought of the way Prince Merrick had wrinkled his nose playfully at Cassius the night Geoffrey was taken with the fainting spell. Recalled the kindness in his voice when he said the tattered playground Cassius had played in with his sisters was lovely. Remembered the pure joy that had rolled off him when he played with the children at the orphanage. He was not going to think of his swollen prick, the soft curve of his buttocks, or the pink that had tinted his cheeks. The ones on his face, not his behind. Those things weren’t the point.
“What are you smiling at, Cas?”
Fucking hell. He’d been smiling? This was…foreign, this friendly affection he suddenly felt for the prince. Foreign, inappropriate, and quite frankly would piss Cas off if the memory of Merrick’s nakedness was not still so prime in his head. “Nothing. It is the drink,” he lied. “And the prince isn’t so bad, but you have become a gossip, my friend.” He paused, didn’t dare look at Valor before he added, “Is it so bad?”
“The gossip?” Valor somehow knew what he spoke of.
“Yes.”
“Yes,” Valor concurred, and Cassius gave a slight chuckle, even though he didn’t feel it. He appreciated Valor’s honesty. “You know how it is. You moved up the ranks quickly already, and now to become valet? Yes, people are talking. It doesn’t help that you keep yourself cut off from most everyone but me. You haven’t given anyone else the chance to know you.”
“I am not here to make friends.” Cas shook his head and leaned on the wall his bed sat against. Valor picked up the cards, their game apparently finished, and scooted over beside Cas. “I’m here to support my family.” Which was another reason not to entertain thoughts of the prince being kind, or to wonder what his mouth tasted like.
Oh, that last one was a new development. He thought on his day off it might be wise to make a trip to Hadleigh, to the inn that catered to men like him.
“You can do both—make friends and support your family. The two are not mutually exclusive, my friend.”
“I’m not good with people,” he admitted. He never had been, which was why it had always surprised him that he’d become close with Valor and that it lasted this long.
“I know you’re not.”
Cassius playfully pushed the other man. “You’re not helping.” Though he truly was. He’d needed this.
“Sure I am. You’re smiling. And…I’ll talk to the staff, but you can help by speaking with them too. Spend more time with us rather than in your room and scribbling in your book.”
He bit his cheek so he didn’t tell Valor it wasn’t merely scribbles. As much as he’d loved his father, he’d always said the same thing. But to Cassius, it was his heart.
“So what’s this about the prince not being so bad?” Valor queried.
“Nothing.” He wished he hadn’t opened his mouth about Prince Merrick at all.
He could feel Valor’s intense stare burning a hole through him, yet Cas ignored it.
“Cassius…”
“Valor…” he replied. Where was his drink? He thought the night would go much more smoothly if he was drunk. Suddenly, he wished he was still in the parlor with Prince Merrick as he entertained the king of Cairn, which was saying a lot. He had been frightened he’d caused trouble with the prince nearly being late, but it hadn’t been bad. The evening had been awkward for Cas, but that had been the extent of it.
Other than the men Cassius had lain with, Valor was the only other who knew he had a penchant for men. Valor didn’t share the same desires, but he kept Cassius’s secret and did not look down upon him for it. It was because of Valor’s love of whiskey that he even knew—Cassius had drunk too much of it one night. Too much drink gave him loose lips.
“Fucking hell, Cas. You want to bed the prince!” he said, his voice too loud.
“Shh! Christ, be quiet.” Cas shook his head and shoved off the thin, uncomfortable bed.
“Does he—”
“No,” Cassius cut him off. Of course, the prince couldn’t favor men. “And I do not want to bed him.” Only, he did… But could one blame him? The prince was attractive, and Cas’s prick quite missed the feel of being inside someone.
“You’re attracted to him?” Valor questioned.
“I’m not blind…so yes. But do you wish to lie with every beautiful woman you see?”
“Is that a trick question?” Valor replied, and Cas couldn’t help but chuckle again. When Cas sighed, Valor continued. “I am kidding, my friend. I just… It is not wise to entertain such thoughts. It’s unwise under most circumstances, and this is the prince of Evergreen.” Because the last thing Cassius needed was for his family to have another strike against them. For his family to be looked upon as black sheep because of Cassius’s leaning.
He knew that. Of course he knew it. Christ, why had one erection made him so crazy? “There are no thoughts,” Cas replied. “Just interest from my prick, which I shall remedy on my next day off with a trip somewhere discreet.” Cassius never knew when he would have a free day. It all depended on Prince Merrick’s schedule.
Valor nodded, but Cassius wasn’t sure the man believed him. He was troubled himself. Yes, the prince was attractive. He had always thought that, but he was confused by his curiosity about Prince Merrick…about the joy he’d felt as they had played at the orphanage earlier that day. About the way his own cheeks often reddened in the prince’s company when Cas wasn’t the type to blush. About admitting the park was one he went to with his sisters, because he kept those truths close to his chest.
Maybe it was the emotional upheaval he’d had in his life…losing his father, then his rapidly changing positions within the castle.
All Cas knew was, he was tired…tired and confused. His bones were weary, and his fingers itched to write. He longed to pet and feed the horses, to ride until there was nothing else, the way he had been able to do at the farm. His chest ached to see his mother and his sisters daily and to feel happiness that too often seemed to elude him.
“Well, if you’re that in need, I do have a prick I could offer you. Men have been known to take male lovers to ease their need.”
Valor smiled, and Cas couldn’t help but do the same. He knew his friend was teasing him, and he appreciated the effort.
“No, thank you. You’re not attractive enough for me.”
“You pig! I’m highly offended!” Valor continued their game but then added, “Just be careful, my friend. If you make a mistake and anyone discovers your attraction…” He didn’t have to finish.
“Nothing a trip to the inn won’t cure,” he said again.
Valor nodded. The mood of their evening had dampened, and it wasn’t long until Valor left to go to his own room—or likely to lie with the princess’s lady maid as he sometimes did. Cas rummaged through his drawer and withdrew his book and pen before lying on his bed again.
The blush of red,
Racing across pale curves,
Dips, valleys, a craving of skin…
Cassius sighed and closed his book before he got himself into trouble.
9
Merrick
Shall I prepare another snifter of brandy, Your Majesty?” one of the footmen asked the king.
“I think that will be all for tonight,” the king replied, raising his hand to wave the silver tray off. “Thank you.”
The footman bowed his head before exiting the parlor, where the royal family was relaxing with a quiet evening after dinner.
It felt like so long since Merrick’s family had a free night to spend together that he was quite enjoying his time, lounging with his sketch pad on the sofa. His mother was softly playing chopsticks on the piano, something she normally did when she had idle time, while his father was poring over
some ledgers at the small wooden desk. Marjorie was playing a game of solitaire at the table, more than likely daydreaming about her new handsome suitor named Charles. She had come home dreamy-eyed from her second outing with him, and Merrick couldn’t help poking fun at his sister, who was normally a levelheaded cynic. Apparently, this did not apply to matters of the heart.
As he listened to his mother describe an upcoming charity event for fallen soldiers in war-torn countries, Merrick looked down at the fresh sheet, where he’d begun randomly sketching the outline of a nose and lips. Though it wasn’t totally arbitrary or innocent. Cassius had the day off today because Merrick had no major events on his schedule, yet he still remained on Merrick’s mind.
Since the royal family only employed one valet or lady’s maid per member, time off could prove tricky. But Cassius had absolutely earned the day to travel home and spend time with his family. Merrick had even stupidly suggested that he use one of the royal motorcars to make the journey easier. He’d more than once made the same offer to Geoffrey, whose gaze had briefly lit up at the notion of driving one of the two-seat roadsters before he declined. And just as Merrick had suspected, Cassius insisted on walking to the train station for the hour-long journey to the next stop. Merrick yearned to go with him, not only curious to learn more about his life, but also to escape for a little while. If only he could blend into the background and pretend he was a commoner of Evergreen for the day.
It’d been a couple of weeks since the bath incident with Cassius, and to say that Merrick was more self-conscious than ever would be an understatement.
Cassius had stepped into the role of valet seamlessly, keeping Merrick on schedule for the most part, dressing and driving him to meetings and luncheons, but they never scratched below the surface again, idly discussing the weather as if they were mere acquaintances. And Merrick supposed in a way they were, despite having shared long blocks of time together. But Merrick longed to know more about the proud man who hoped to provide generously for his family—like his affinity for horses and whether he’d recently visited the stables with his friend Valor. Except, if Cassius knew he’d eavesdropped on the two of them that one evening, Cassius might consider leaving his employ or asking for a demotion, so Merrick stayed silent on all subjects.
Ever After (Forbidden Love #1) Page 5
