“Merrick,” he replied.
Christ, he was beautiful. Cas yearned to touch his hair, to cup his cheek, to have Merrick’s taste on his lips once more.
They moved toward one another, closer and closer, until they met in the center of the clearing.
“Are you truly here?” Merrick asked.
“I think so,” Cassius replied. It felt like a dream to him as well.
Merrick looked down, his spine curling. “I did not think you would come back.”
Cas’s heart bled for the pain he’d caused his prince. “I did not think I would either,” he answered honestly. Merrick whipped his head up at that. “Not because I didn’t want to. You have much to lose, my prince. More than I could ever give you in return.”
“Should I not be the one who decides how much what I lose or gain means to me?” He shook his head. “You do not get to make that decision for me, Cas, just as I cannot make it for you…and that is what I did by approaching you at the ball. I apologize for that. I should not have done it so publicly, but that doesn’t change what I want. You think you don’t give me much, but your love gives more than any title ever could. It is with you that I am the truest form of myself.”
Cassius’s knees went weak. His heart thudded in his ears, and his vision blurred. “It is with you that I am the truest form of myself as well. I could not separate my love for you from my fear of what you would sacrifice for me. I could not see how the trade was fair to you…to the people of Evergreen.”
Cassius shook his head, trying to release the thoughts so they made sense. “I believe I was afraid…of not being worthy of you. I have spent weeks writing, scribbling my thoughts, reliving every moment we shared, and I saw…the happiness we shared when we were together. The gleam in your dark eyes when you saw me. And I realized…that is what it’s about, is it not? Those pieces of happiness are what matters. Not title or name. I write stories and poems of love and dreams coming true, but I did not allow myself to see it as something that could be real…not for me…but it was true…what we shared, and not only am I better for it, the world could be too.”
“I am a better man because of you, Cas. Imagine what we could do together?”
Cassius gasped…hoped. “Do you still want me, my prince?”
“I have never wanted another the way I want you. There will never be another I love the way I love you.”
Merrick raised his hand, cupped Cassius’s cheek. Cas nuzzled into him, closed his eyes, trembled when he felt Merrick’s lips touch his. They kissed slowly, deeply, reexploring each other.
Cassius swallowed down Merrick’s moans and then fed him his own.
And it was…perfect.
When they pulled apart, Cassius led Merrick back to the rock. The sun kept the chill off as they climbed on together.
Cassius opened his bag. “This is for you…from Emily.” He pulled out a knitted hat, which Merrick immediately tugged onto his head.
“I cannot wait to thank her properly,” he replied.
They spoke about the work Merrick had been doing behind the scenes, and Cassius told Merrick about his new position at a horse farm in Pinewood. He worked long days, but it would help him care for his family, and he would still be close to the castle grounds, so they could see one another often.
“I do not want to be away from you,” Merrick told him. “I want to share a bed with you every night. Winterfrost is plenty big for all of us.”
Cassius frowned. “All of us?”
“Annabelle, Emily, and Elizabeth. I do not want you to be away from your family, but I don’t want to be away from you either.”
Cassius’s chest swelled. “So I would get to come home to my very own prince every night?” he teased.
“Your very own,” Merrick replied.
“I will miss dressing you…my prince. I am afraid you might be in disarray without me.”
Merrick laughed, and Cassius joined him.
“I am a mess without you. I still cannot get my cuff links correct. I think we should spend our days dressing and undressing one another, though.”
Cassius loved the sound of that.
They continued to talk, to kiss. Merrick returned Cassius’s journal, which he said he carried with him always but had not read. Nothing except the final entry by mistake.
“Keep it,” Cassius told him.
“And you this,” Merrick gave Cassius his artwork.
When nightfall was too close to stall any longer, they mounted their horses and rode back, free and in love.
There was much to figure out. They knew it would not be easy, but as long as they were together, it would be worth it.
35
Merrick
Nine Months Later
The dessert plates had recently been removed from the tables, and the guests tittered about excitedly, waiting for the royal couple’s first dance. Merrick thought Marjorie and Charles looked positively regal in their wedding attire. Their nuptials had been the talk of the country the past several months, as well as the princess keeping the Davendall name, and Marjorie was as elegant and graceful a royal princess as the king and queen could’ve hoped for. Many of course balked at the royal children becoming too modern and forward-thinking, the very opposite of what his mother had feared. And though the chief consul had words with the king and queen about the future of the monarchy, the family had stuck together, just as promised.
Marjorie was followed practically anywhere she went in town by children who dreamed of getting a smile or wave from the princess. Whenever she shared any tidbits about the wedding preparations with the public, they devoured every detail. Anything from her stunning chiffon dress lined in crystals, to her spectacular emerald ring, to the delicious cake with buttercream frosting that the guests had just indulged in, would be gossiped about for years to come.
When the bride and groom rode together in the horse-drawn carriage from the courthouse to the castle for the evening celebration, the streets were lined with Pinewood residents whistling and cheering, some having even come from as far away as Hadleigh and Stonespass to catch a glimpse of the happy couple.
“Stunning,” Annabelle had whispered upon first seeing them that morning. Emily just stared with wonder in her eyes while Elizabeth clapped excitedly.
Evergreen’s focus on the newest royal couple had kept most of the spotlight off Prince Merrick’s apparently torrid love affair with his former valet. Though he had always wanted to be as relatable as he could be with the public, this was one detail of his private life he kept close to the vest. Cassius had moved into Winterfrost Manor shortly after their reunion, but they’d waited until the end of the school year to set Annabelle, Emily, and Elizabeth up in the west wing bedrooms. Merrick had hoped it would feel like a separate dwelling of their own.
Even still, the romance between him and Cassius had taken on a life of its own, many in Evergreen apparently referring to Cassius as Merrick’s Prince Charming, and the idea of that positively charmed Merrick. He’d sometimes whisper it to Cassius during a passionate kiss or after he’d beg Cassius to fuck him. Or even when they’d lie about in their bedroom so Merrick could make scandalous sketches of Cassius in various stages of undress. Merrick loved the flush that would begin like a rosy bloom in the center of his lover’s chest, only to move upward to dust his chin and cheeks.
The manor had come to life with Cas and his family there, and it was just the sort of arrangement Merrick had always dreamed of. Though Cassius no longer helped dress or chauffeur him around, he somehow still kept them organized and on schedule. And since Emily had taken such a great interest in the horses, they had moved Ursula, Tabby, and a handful more to the stalls closest to the manor. Merrick hoped Cassius would finally agree to breed and train horses of their own someday. But if he’d learned anything, it was that the man he loved was proud and stubborn. He would only agree to quit his job on the farm if they had a solid, defined plan.
As the guests lined up along the dance floor, m
uch like on that one fateful night last winter, Merrick’s nerves weren’t jangling from worry, only excitement. Marjorie and Charles looked glorious dancing for the first time as a married couple. And as the stately king and queen joined them in the center of the floor, he felt proud to be part of this family.
When his mother met his eye and nodded in approval, Merrick finally stood and held out his hand to the man he loved. He could see Elizabeth’s beaming smile in his side view. Merrick could not help but grin himself, which he did every time he saw the honey quartz ring, that matched Cassius’s eyes, on his finger. They had not made an official announcement. At this time, it was only for them. Citizens speculated of course, but it was important to them to keep some things to themselves. Plus, they still had much work to do in regards to equality.
“I would love the honor of dancing with the man who owns my heart.”
“It is I who would be honored,” Cassius replied, bowing to him gracefully.
Cassius took his hand, and Merrick could hear the guests’ murmurs as they finally stepped onto the dance floor as an official royal couple. Marjorie beamed at them, and Merrick sighed in blissful relief.
At the back of the room, Merrick could just make out the Duke of Lexington, who had been invited along with his male guest. He hoped they might be brave enough to join them later. And nearer the main entrance, Merrick spotted Lady Penelope as well, who was now engaged to a handsome man from the high courts. He could also just make out Valor’s bright smile as he sneaked near the open doorway from the grand foyer to catch a glimpse of his friend. He would make a dedicated head chef someday, maybe even at the manor.
“What do you think they’ll say about us?” Cassius whispered in Merrick’s ear as they danced heart to heart and cheek to cheek.
“That we are two handsome princes madly in love.”
“We are certainly handsome this evening,” Cassius replied with a twinkle in his eye. They had chosen to wear matching black tailcoats with golden cuff links. “And I shall definitely love you until I take my final breath.”
“And I you,” Merrick replied with a thick throat as he pressed a discreet kiss to his temple.
Merrick had recently delivered an impassioned plea before the government’s general assembly, imploring them to consider equal rights for all citizens who might choose to live openly, according to their nature, with those they loved. It quite possibly might take rearranging the stars, but by God, he would never give up. It had become his calling. And even if they did not change their minds, he and Cassius would always belong to one another.
Just as he was about to voice his thoughts, he felt small hands cinch his waist as Elizabeth threw her arms around the both of them. “I would like to dance with a prince.”
Merrick chuckled as Cassius picked up his sister and swung her around as she protested amid giggles. Merrick felt so perfectly content right then that he kissed her cheek and they all joined hands to dance together. It was she who had recently encouraged Merrick to illustrate some of Cassius’s wonderful stories.
That winter, they would begin publishing a series of books with all proceeds going directly to children’s charities. The first would feature a stable boy rescued by a princess—dedicated to Emily, of course—and the one they’d only just completed was a tale of two princes. They’d been struggling with the title until that very moment when he looked into Cassius’s eyes and his heart stuttered in his chest. Ever After.
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Here’s a list of books co-written by Christina Lee and Riley Hart (AKA Nyrae Dawn):
Free Fall series:
TOUCH THE SKY
CHASE THE SUN
PAINT THE STARS
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LIVING OUT LOUD
(read further on for an excerpt)
About Christina Lee
Once upon a time, Christina Lee lived in New York City and was a wardrobe stylist. She spent her days getting in cabs, shopping for photo shoots, eating amazing food, and drinking coffee at her favorite hangouts.
Now she lives in the Midwest with her husband and son—her two favorite guys. She’s been a clinical social worker and a special education teacher. But it wasn't until she wrote a weekly column for the local newspaper that she realized she could turn the fairytales inside her head into the reality of writing fiction.
She's addicted to lip balm, coffee, and kissing. Because everything is better with kissing.
She writes MM Contemporary as well as Adult and New Adult Romance. She believes in happily-ever-afters for all, so reading and writing romance for everybody under the rainbow helps quench her soul.
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OTHER BOOK BY CHRISTINA LEE
There you Stand (MM from another series)
Roadmap to Your Heart series
The Darkest Flame
The Faintest Spark
The Deepest Blue
The Hardest Fall
The Sweetest Goodbye
Under My Skin series
Regret
Reawaken
Reclaim, coming soon
Co-written with Nyrae Dawn (AKA Riley Hart):
Touch the Sky
Chase the Sun
Paint the Stars
Living Out Loud
M/F books that can all standalone:
All of You
Before You Break
Whisper to Me
Promise Me This
Two of Hearts
Three Sacred Words
Twelve Truths and a Lie
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Riley Hart is the girl who wears her heart on her sleeve. She’s a hopeless romantic. A lover of sexy stories, passionate men, and writing about all the trouble they can get into together. If she’s not writing, you’ll probably find her reading.
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Weight of the World & Up for the Challenge with Devon McCormack
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Faking It
Working It
Owning It
Last Chance Series:
Depth of Field
Color Me In
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Dare You To
Gone For You
Tied to You
Crossroads Series:
Crossroads
Shifting Gears
Test Drive
Jumpstart
Rock Solid Construction Series:
Rock Solid
Broken Pieces Series:
Broken Pieces
Full Circle
Losing Control
Blackcreek Series:
Collide
Stay
Pretend
Return to Blackcreek
AS NYRAE DAWN
Standalones:
A Hundred Thousand Words
Turn the World Upside Down
The History of Us
Free Fall Series with Christina Lee
Touch the Sky
Chase the Sun
Paint the Stars
Standalone with Christina Lee
Living Out Loud
An Excerpt from Living Out Loud
By Christina Lee and Nyrae Dawn
Chapter One
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Ben
The cursor blinks as I consider whether to leave well enough alone. My palms sweat as I begin typing the message, my fingers fumbling on the keys:
Hey, Xavier! This is Ben Emerson. It’s been a long time.
A long time since we were fourteen and shared a first kiss. A long time since I freaked, pushed you away, and barely spoke to you after that.
Your family moved the following year, and I never saw you again. Surprised I didn’t search for you online sooner. But life’s been rough, to say the least. And I’ve been scared for too damn long. And now I’m finally on my own.…Trying to find my way in this vibrant city. Guess it feels nice to reach out to an old friend. Don’t have too many of those anymore. Someone familiar in an overwhelming situation.
I hit the back button and delete the short message. Exit out of Facebook and walk to the fridge to pull out a cold soda, glad my roommate isn’t around to see me stress out like this over a damn social media message.
But lots of shit is new to me lately. Moving to San Fran, for example, and finally leaving my conservative family behind. I lift my ball cap and push my sweaty hair away from my eyes before readjusting it onto my head.
Ever After (Forbidden Love #1) Page 22