by West, Jade
Yes… Bath Street… right here… pale, but breathing fine…
I opened my eyes on hers when she leaned in close.
“He’s coming. Don’t you worry, sweetheart. He’ll be here soon.”
She winked as she put my phone back in my handbag. I tried again to gain control of my speech but the exhaustion was too much.
So I breathed.
I leant back in the seat and let the world turn around me… until I heard a voice in the chaos that cut through it all.
“It’s epilepsy, yes,” I heard him say, and then I smelt him. I smelt the scent I loved so much, earthy and warm. I felt him beside me, kneeling close, my skin tingling and crying out for his. His eyes were fierce on mine. His breaths were hot on my face. “Anna, it’s Lucas. Are you okay? Do you need a doctor?”
I managed to shake my head, my hand reaching out to grab for him and landing on his shoulder. He was wearing a suit. His tie was purple.
My brain was still coming back to itself, but I knew I liked his purple tie.
It was a relief when my voice came out solid.
“No,” I said. “No doctor, thanks. I’ll be okay.”
I knew Lucas would likely do a Sebastian on me and insist I headed to the local hospital for them to poke and prod me and tell me I needed my meds reviewed. I was fully prepared for him to bundle me up in ill, so ill considerations and look on me as an invalid who’d fucked up with bright lights, or eating bad, or not sleeping enough, or just about anything else he thought could bring a seizure to my door.
But he didn’t do any of it.
“I’ll get your shopping,” he said, and got to his feet.
I watched him follow the blonde angel to an aisle with my beetroot and chocolate in tow, and watched her flash me a smile over her shoulder. It was weird as all fuck. She’d seen my knickers around his cock, for fuck’s sake.
It was just a minute or two before he returned, coming back to me with a bag of shopping and an extended hand.
“Can you walk? My truck is right outside.”
I nodded, grabbed hold of his fingers, and he pulled me to my feet. It felt the most natural thing in the world to lean into his side and let him hold me tight on our way out of the supermarket.
“I’ll be alright,” I told him once he’d helped me into the passenger seat and dropped into the driver’s side. “I can go home now.”
It was at that suggestion he pulled a face and buckled himself in. “And who is going to be at home?”
I shrugged. “Vicky, I think.”
“Vicky? Vicky Mason do you mean?”
I gave him another nod, shocked to remember just how associated our social circles used to be. “Vicky Mason is my housemate.”
“And she’s definitely home?”
My stomach lurched at the thought of her horror at me coming through the door fresh from a seizure with Lucas on my arm. She’d be onto Mum and Nicola in a heartbeat, and then I’d have a whole mountain more exhaustion to contend with.
“No,” I told Lucas. “I’m not sure she’s home.”
He turned the key in the ignition. “Fine. In that case you’re coming back to mine.”
I didn’t have the energy to protest.
At least that’s what I told myself as he drove us away.
Chapter Fourteen
Lucas
She was barely with me on the way home, drifting in and out as I headed away from the city. I kept looking at her, a wash of relief flooding over me that she was safe in my care.
I’d been petrified when I’d first seen her there, slumped in that booth by the customer service aisle. Her eyes had struggled to focus as I knelt in front of her, anything but herself as she battled with conversation. She seemed to be so tired now that it was hard to know just how back to herself she really was.
I took the journey as steadily as I could, but my foot was firmly on the accelerator as I headed out onto the Lydney back roads. She was quiet all the way, head leaning towards the passenger window and her hands clasped in her lap. She was moonlight pale and her hair was ragged, but it was well and truly my beautiful minx Anna resting beside me.
My whole body was twisting with need. The need to hold her tight and make it ok. The need to understand. The need to run my fingers down her fear and promise her I was there.
But I could only drive.
She barely came to her senses when I pulled up on the drive and climbed out of the truck. She stirred, and her eyes opened with a flutter when I arrived at her side, but she was so exhausted she barely murmured a word as I lifted her from her seat and helped her inside the house.
“Almost there,” I said, and headed straight through to the living room with her held tight at my side.
I eased her down into the big comfy armchair and kept the dogs away, then went back out to grab her shopping bags from the backseat. I dropped them on the kitchen counter, casting her a glance en route, and then I went back to her, stocked up with juice and chocolate.
She looked even more captivating than usual in that chair in the lamplight.
She’d gathered her legs up in the seat, and she was sleeping soundly, breaths steady. Hell, she looked so tiny against the leather like that. My little magpie with her thorny barbs all hidden deep.
I did my best to make her more comfortable. I slipped off her heels and pulled one of the fluffy woollen throws Maya had left behind down from the back of the sofa. I wrapped her up and she snuggled down on instinct, murmuring so softly as she settled.
I guess it was at that moment I realised all over again just how much I loved that woman.
I sat down on the floor in front of that chair, resting back against the base with my hand squeezing her knee, and I waited.
Waited and thought.
Waited and wished.
Waited and remembered everything we used to be.
She woke with a jolt when she finally came back to me. Her eyes were wide, flitting around the room before they landed on mine.
“You were sleeping,” I told her. “I got you from the supermarket and brought you home.”
“Seizure,” she said. “Yeah, I remember.”
There was something about the self-consciousness in her eyes as she threw the throw to the side and slid a hand between her thighs. A vulnerability that punched me in the stomach with the need to make everything alright.
“Sorry,” she said, and breathed a sigh. “It’s just sometimes I…”
Her voice trailed off.
“Sometimes you what?” I asked, but she shook her head.
“Let’s not talk about it.”
“Tell me about the seizures,” I said. “Tell me what they’re like and how they work. How do you make them better? Can you make them better?”
She kept on shaking her head. “Seriously, Lucas. It doesn’t matter. No point talking about it.”
“How often do they happen? Are some worse than others? Tell me.”
But she wouldn’t. She shook her head all over again. “You can take me home now, honestly. I’m really sorry they called you. I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again. Big mistake on my part.”
But it wasn’t a big mistake. It was nothing like a mistake. I was still thinking of the words to express that when she let out a groan.
“My God, Lucas. She saw a photo of your dick.”
“My dick and your panties. Your very dirty panties. I’m sure it’ll burn itself into her memory. She’ll be blushing every time you head in there to get your beetroot.”
“Damn,” she said. “I’ll have to get my vegetables further afield.”
I didn’t move and neither did she. I sat cross-legged on the floor in front of the armchair and she stayed huddled up in it, both of us staring at each other in the lamplight.
“How long have I been asleep?” she asked, and I shrugged.
“I don’t know. Wasn’t keeping track.”
“Sorry,” she said again. “For taking up your Friday evening. I would’ve calle
d someone else, but I couldn’t speak.”
“I’m glad you didn’t,” I told her, and her eyes dropped from mine.
“Don’t say that, Lucas. I shouldn’t be here and you know it.”
My cold rational head might have known it, but the pang in my gut certainly didn’t. I cleared my throat and shunted closer, reaching out for her bare feet and pulling them into my lap.
She’d always liked that.
She let out a moan like she always had, eyes closing tight, and I got to work, kneading those toes on a mission.
Her toenails were red. I loved them that colour. Still, I’d love them any fucking colour, just so long as they were attached to her.
“I’d forgotten how good you are with foot massage,” she whispered.
I circled my thumbs on the arches and upped the pressure.
Her eyes flashed open, twinkling as she smirked. “Still, I’d forgotten just how good you are at a lot of damn things.”
“Ditto,” I said. “Pleasant surprises all round.”
“Pleasant surprises we can’t take advantage of.”
I didn’t let up from her feet. “Why not?”
“Why not what? Take advantage of how well we fuck?”
I nodded. “I’d say that’s quite a good thing to take advantage of.”
She pulled her feet away from me and scowled. “Not when everyone in the world is screaming at you for how much of a moron you’re being. And especially not when you agree with them.” She paused. “Really. You should take me home. Thanks for coming to rescue me, but I shouldn’t be here and we both know it.”
I’d always been direct, so I came right out with my proposition.
“Stay,” I said. “Stay here for the weekend with me.”
She scoffed at me. “For the weekend? Are you crazy?”
“Maybe,” I replied. “But fuck it and stay anyway.”
Her mouth was open as she digested my words, legs bunching back up in the chair.
I gave her time to think, easing back to quiet until she spoke again.
“Even if I wanted to stay for the weekend, what about your daughter? Don’t you see her at the weekends?”
I shook my head. “Usually. But not this weekend.”
“No?”
I rose to my knees and handed her a juice. “No.”
She must have heard the frustration in my tone, and didn’t let it rest at that. “How come not this weekend?”
I leaned in closer, my hands on the arms of the chair. “Don’t ask questions if you’re not prepared to answer them.”
Her eyelashes were so dark as her eyes blinked on mine. She paused and I paused, both of us scorching bright in the silence until she broke it.
“Fine.”
“Fine,” I replied, and got to my feet. “Alternatively, you can start talking. I’ll be making dinner if you want to fill me in on life, the universe and epileptic seizures.”
She ignored me as I made my way through to the kitchen, and I wondered if she was really going to opt for insisting that I take her back into the city. I’d fed the dogs and let them out into the back yard by the time she appeared in the doorway, looking considerably more steady than earlier, with the throw still wrapped around her shoulders. The fluffy purple suited her, just like everything else.
I didn’t say a word as she stood there staring, just kept chopping mushrooms, and she stepped closer, coming to rest against the counter I was working at.
“I have temporal lobe epilepsy,” she said. “It’s weird and it’s horrible and it means my brain screws up and goes blank and I can’t understand what anyone is saying.”
I didn’t stop chopping, but raised my eyes to hers. “How often do you have the seizures?”
She shrugged and tipped her head. “How long is a piece of string? They are trying to control them with lamotrigine, but they’ve been on and off for years. Sometimes hardly any for months, other times they are every few days.”
“And what starts them?”
She let out a sad little laugh. “If only I knew I’d avoid it. Could be anything. Foods, lights, stress, lack of sleep. A whole barrel of them mashed together. The brain can be a fickle bitch.”
“Don’t I know it.” I paused. “What happens when you have one? What can I do to help?”
Another shrug. “Just be there.” Another pause. “People panic and try to get me an ambulance, or a doctor, or lecture me on what I may have done to bring one on.”
“An ambulance and a doctor don’t make any difference?”
She shook her head and brushed some hair behind her ear. “No. No difference. And I’m panicked enough without everyone else doing it around me. Makes it worse.”
“Ok. So calm and support is what you need?”
“It’s not your place to have to worry about it,” she said, but her eyes were heavy. So much unspoken.
We both knew that statement was a pile of shit.
We both knew I’d be worrying plenty about it.
I don’t know who moved first, but the knife dropped from my hand with a clank and the mushrooms scattered from the chopping board. I reached for her and she reached for me, lips open and crashing hard.
The throw dropped from her shoulders, and her arms wrapped around mine. My fingers took her hair and held her tight.
“Stay with me for the weekend,” I managed between kisses.
“We both already know I’m going to,” she breathed back.
Yes.
Yes, we fucking did.
I lifted her up onto the counter, her arms still wrapped around my shoulders. She laughed as her butt squished the mushrooms and I laughed right back.
But it was us.
We were there. We were right.
We were everything.
“This is going to be a disaster,” she said. “People will never let me do this. Not in a million years.”
“People can fuck right off, I’m done with trying to please them,” I said, and kissed her hard.
She hooked her feet behind my back and pressed up tight to my chest, both of us straining for contact. I couldn’t get enough of her. I’d been in a drought of closeness for so long I’d forgotten just how desperate I was for a taste. Every scrap of me was screaming for every scrap of her.
“I can’t stop this,” she whispered. “I can’t stop wanting you. I must be fucking crazy for it, but I can’t stop.”
“Then be fucking crazy,” I said.
“Like I’ve got a choice.”
“Like I’ve got one either.”
Her mouth was wet and hungry. Mine was starving.
Her fingers were shaky on my shirt buttons. Mine were a frenzy on her blouse.
I tore her skirt down her thighs, and pulled her closer to the edge of the counter.
She yanked my tie and tugged my face down to her chest. Fuck yes, I wanted that.
I ate those pretty little tits through her bra, teeth nipping hard, and she moaned like the dirty bitch she’d always been.
“Yes,” she hissed. “More. Give me more! Like that!”
But I was wary. That niggle of concern in the back of my mind bleated loud enough to be heard.
I pulled away, forcing some hint of composure.
“Should you be getting more rest? Are you well enough for this?”
“Yes!” she snapped. “Yes, I’m well enough for this. My brain works plenty well enough to know what the hell I’m well enough for, thank you. I’m always saying the same damn thing.”
Oh, there was challenge in it. Defiance. The need to be heard.
Fuck, my heart was beating to the same tune. Fuck, I’d spent years wanting my voice to count for something.
I heard her plenty loud and clear.
And I sure as fuck didn’t need telling twice.
Chapter Fifteen
Anna
It was beautiful madness and I needed every bit of it.
He wasn’t gentle. He wasn’t calm. He wasn’t wrapping me up in cotton wool and
telling me just how careful I should be with every little thing.
He was rough.
Fierce.
Craving for more of me just as I was craving for him.
And he was absolutely fucking incredible.
He bit and sucked at my tits until I squealed and shuddered, his fingers teasing my clit just right through my knickers. I was a mess on that kitchen counter, hands crushing mushrooms as I gripped for balance, and just as I thought I was gaining it, he had me rippling a whole lot harder.
My body was out of my control all over again, but it was a whole other dance and a whole other tune. He didn’t pull my knickers down as he kissed his way down my stomach, his breath met wet lace and had me begging.
He delivered.
Tongue and teeth and rhythm. Grunts and shunts and heaven.
He was heaven.
His hands were brutal as he spread my thighs as far as they would go. My shoulders were back against the wall, fingers seeking out his scalp to hold him tight.
And then the dogs started barking at the back door. I felt his smile against my pussy and I couldn’t stop the giggle.
“Hold that thought,” he said, and I nodded, taking back hold of the counter as he pulled away.
“I don’t think I could lose that thought if I tried.”
The dogs were a flash of fur as they bounded on in, and Lucas was a picture, half naked and grinning like a beacon as he guided them into the room to the side.
“Where were we?” he asked as he presented himself back between my legs, but I didn’t want this. I didn’t want teetering on the edge while he was out of my grip. I wanted all of him. Every inch of him on every inch of me.
My eyes swallowed his up as I dropped from the counter and took his face in my hands. His mouth was so close to mine as he spoke.
“I guess you aren’t holding out for mushrooms,” he said, and that sparkle in his gaze set me on fire.
I dropped to my knees and he cushioned my fall, pulling me close. I tasted myself on his lips and kissed him harder. Deeper. But it wasn’t enough.
Our fingers had lives of their own, seeking out spit and skin and deeper, deeper, deeper. I sucked his thumb, his mouth still open on mine, and he grunted for more.
