I Need You (Learning to Let Go)

by Hazel St James

  Sara remembered that Darrin had admitted that she starred in most of his dreams, but she had neglected to tell him that he was the lead in a few of her nighttime fantasies, as well. It had been a long time since she had something satisfying between her legs, and her patience had come to an end.

  “No. Please. I need you, Darrin. Now,” she growled.

  Darrin leaned over to where his jeans lay, pulling out his wallet and a foil condom packet. It didn’t take him long to unwrap the latex, and roll it over his impressive length. He crawled back over her body, pausing to let his breath tickle her mound. He parted her labia enough to nuzzle her clit quickly as she mewled with need.

  “All right, Sara. Hold on,” he chuckled, as he continued to make his way up her body. Darrin used his hand to guide his cock into her aching channel, slowly inching his way inside. He would inch forward, pulling back a bit, before going further. Sara sighed when she could feel his groin pressing against her pelvis, but her relief quickly fell away as he pulled all the way out and thrust back in. Gasping as he hit the top of his stroke inside her, she held her breath, willing the pain to subside. He was so deep and hadn’t given her any time to adjust.

  Pushing back against his shoulders, Sara whimpered as Darrin tried pulling all the way out. She grabbed blindly for his forearms, yelling, “No, wait. Darrin, just wait.” He didn’t try to move again, instead he held perfectly still as she tried to catch her breath. “Give me a second to adjust.”

  Sara moved her hips while still impaled on his cock, trying to find a better position for him to continue. Opening her eyes, she could see the pained look on Darrin’s face, which she was almost certain mirrored her own right now. Sara wanted him to continue, but she knew that things were going to be tricky if Darrin had thought he had hurt her. She relaxed her body, trying to get back into the right frame of mind. She still had a hold of his arms, and tried pulling him back down to her. They were still intimately connected, and Darrin slowly made his way down to her, anguish filling his eyes.

  “Please stop looking at me like you kicked a puppy, Darrin,” she laughed. Continuing to tease him, she said, “I haven’t had many lovers, and I’m sure you’re aware that you are bigger than most men.” On a breathy whisper, she told him, “Try again, just go slower and give me some time to get used to it.”

  Darrin didn’t answer. He just propped himself up inches away from her face, his hands in her hair as he looked deep into her eyes. Sara knew that he was paying closer attention to her expressions so he could tell if he was hurting her again. Ever so slowly, Darrin started to roll his hips in a slow circle, careful not to bottom out again. This time, Sara could feel her insides quiver as he carefully moved in and out. The look of adoration on his face was helping her to feel connected to him in a way that she wasn’t used to. He was normally so closed off, hardly ever expressing his feelings to anyone. Sara watched his emotions pass over his face, the hurt moving to pleasure, and then accelerating to desire. His movements ever so slowly brought her to a delicious orgasm that spread like wildfire across her nerve endings, leaving her panting underneath him.

  Darrin was still slowly working in and out of her, a pained look on his face again as he tried to hold himself back. Knowing that he hadn’t orgasmed yet, she decided that she needed to add some fuel to his fire. Sara gently ran her fingers down his back as far as she could, relishing in the soft moan that he made. His sexy noises egged her on, but this time she dug her fingernails into his skin, pulling back up towards his neck. A guttural groan came out of his chest as he started to rock in and out faster. Within seconds, his head flew back, and he started to curse, “Oh fuck, Sara. I’m coming. Fuucckk!” Pumping harder, Sara could feel his cock pulsing as he filled the thin shield, and she encouraged him by squeezing her internal muscles, milking him as hard as she could.

  Darrin slumped his shoulders, and his eyes closed as he rolled off to lie next to her on his side. Sara rolled onto her side to face him, watching his expression, waiting for him to speak. After a few minutes, she finally reached out to place her palm on his still heaving chest. The rise and fall stilled under her fingers for a moment, before he grabbed her hand, pulling it up to his lips, placing a tender kiss on her palm.

  “Please tell me I didn’t hurt you, Sara.”

  Sara scooted over to him, snuggling down into his chest as she answered, “You didn’t, Darrin. Like I said, I just needed to adjust. That was a good orgasm, baby. Thank you.”

  Darrin wrapped his arms around her small frame, resting his head on top of hers, “Yeah, that was fucking hot. I think you drew blood when you scratched me. I might have to come up with a new nickname for you, though. Doll baby doesn’t really fit you after that.”

  Sara blushed as he held her, surprised at her own actions. Not knowing how to explain her blatant sexual aggression, she decided not to overthink things, and just enjoy the moment. Sara lay still in his warm embrace, enjoying the peace that came with being held by such powerful arms. As if on cue, Darrin pulled her in even closer, hugging her tight as he reached over to grab the side of the blanket they were not laying on, pulling it over them.

  Sara could feel the vibration coming from Darrin’s chest as he chuckled to himself. Sara was still in a post-coital haze as he whispered into her hair, “My little hellcat.”

  Chapter Five

  June 29th, Friday

  The last two weeks had passed by in a blur for Sara. Between working twelve hours a day, and spending her nights with Darrin, she was exhausted. It didn’t help that she was trying to survive on less and less sleep every day, as the nights with Darrin were becoming more and more adventurous. Yesterday before supper, he had rocked her world when he pushed her up against the wall, taking her from behind. It was sheer, unadulterated lust that fueled that love-making session, even if Sara had unintentionally turned Darrin into a sex-crazed beast.

  It had been extremely hot in the afternoon; the sign at the bank said it was ninety-one degrees at five pm. Sara had stopped at home to grab a change of clothes, before heading over to Darrin’s to make dinner. The two of them were both self-proclaimed “homebodies,” preferring to stay in after their disastrous attempt at a date.

  When Sara tried selecting some cooler clothes for the evening, her modest clothing selection and the fact that she still hadn’t done laundry yet this week, made her options small. Shrugging into a string bikini for a bra, and covering it with a basic ribbed tank top, then pulling on a pair of tight white cotton hipster shorts seemed liked the perfect summer outfit. Obviously she had made the wrong choice when Darrin eyed her getting out of her car. He stood in the doorway of his shop, bare chested, wiping his sweaty brow with his T-shirt, shooting her a menacing look that about stopped her dead in her tracks.

  “I hope for fuck’s sake that you didn’t let anyone else see you in that, hellcat,” Darrin quipped as she walked over to the shop.

  Sara stopped to look down at her outfit, before waving her arms back over his frame, “You mean like what you’re wearing? I don’t exactly see the difference, Darrin. You can’t see anything intimate anyway.”

  Darrin pushed away from the entry to the garage, the door swinging shut behind him. In one step, he was standing in front of her, gripping her arms as he turned her around. Sara could see that he was studying something on her rear, but she had no idea what he was looking at so intently.

  “I can clearly see that you are not wearing any underwear, Sara,” he said as he slapped her ass hard. “I don’t share well at all. Remember that, my little neko.”

  Sara narrowed her eyes at him, but quickly turned her glower into a tight smile. It really pissed her off when he went caveman on her, but his eyes gave away his true feelings; almost immediately she could see the faintest bits of laughter in his eyes. He must not be too angry with her, since he had softened his words with one of her many nicknames. Ever since their first time together, he had insisted on calling her different variations of cat, hellcat, or tiger. Neko was the
Japanese name for cat, but he most often reserved it for nighttime activities. Sara could feel the blush creeping up her cheeks when she thought about her overly aggressive actions that fueled his need to label her as a wild, wanton feline. The scratch marks on his back only lasted for a few days, and now you could barely see the marks where she had pierced his skin with her fingernails.

  Taking a deep breath, Sara turned to walk back towards the front door to the modest farm house. She tried to keep from shimmying her hips too much as she made her way across the gravel driveway and over to the steps, knowing that Darrin was watching her ass the whole way. Taking a peek over her shoulder, Sara could see that he was clenching his fists tightly at his sides, looking pained as he turned to enter the shop. She knew that he was muttering something, but couldn’t hear him from halfway across the yard.

  Within five minutes, she was well aware of what it was he was saying when he pushed her face first against the wall in the hallway leading to his bedroom. “Crazy,” he mumbled into her neck as he suckled on the sensitive skin below her ear, and kneaded her breasts in both hands through the shirt and make-shift bra.

  “You could drive a celibate monk crazy in these fuckin’ shorts,” Darrin said in her ear. In a flash, he let go of her breasts, quickly reaching down to pull the flimsy shorts off. He picked them up off the floor, turning enough to the side to toss them behind him onto the bed in his room.

  Sara turned her head to the side to see what he was doing, and he responded by holding up his index and middle finger in a V, pointing them at his own eyes as he tersely said, “Those shorts are for my eyes only, Sara.”

  Darrin grabbed her hips, rubbing his jean-clad erection up and down the crack of her ass. A strangled moan escaped her lips as she laid her forehead against the wall. She could feel Darrin pulling her backwards as he said, “Keep your hands on the wall and spread your legs shoulder-width apart.”

  Sara felt a shudder pass through her body as the heat rose between her legs, making it hard to not clench her thighs together for some relief for her overheated center. Making a forced effort, Sara worked on relaxing her legs enough to slowly slide them outwards as Darrin had instructed. Darrin had moved away from her, making short work of removing his boots, jeans and boxers. He closed the space between them, his rock-hard cock bobbing against her ass as he ran his calloused hands down her back, causing her skin to pebble.

  “Any objections to me taking you from behind, Sara?”

  Sara paused to think about what he was asking, almost shocked that he had asked permission. Her arousal level dropped, and her hips stopped undulating on their own when she realized that he wasn’t taking over the lead and forcing her to do this. It was still hot as sin, but the intensity of the entire situation had dropped back to normal.

  Darrin must have sensed the change in her body language, as he leaned forward to rest his head on her back. “We don’t have to do this, doll baby. I can carry you into the bedroom and make love to you there if this makes you uncomfortable.”

  Quickly realizing that she had let him astray with her lack of verbal cues, Sara arched her back into him, making him lift his head up. “No, I like it, Darrin. I just didn’t know what you meant by b-behind is all,” Sara stuttered as she lied.

  Wincing at her own words, she sighed before she dropped her shoulders in defeat. Darrin was the best thing that had happened to her in a long time, and he deserved her to be truthful. He was always truthful with her, to the point of being brutally honest sometimes.

  Willing up her courage from deep inside, Sara let her inhibitions fall away as she blurted out, “That was a lie, Darrin. I’m sorry. I, u-um, get really turned on when you take my options away from me in the bedroom…when you don’t give me any choices.” Sara turned around to face him, trying to avert her eyes from his slowly deflating erection.

  Darrin pulled his eyebrows together in a frown as she continued, “I really, really love having sex with you, Darrin. It’s just that, I seem to have an affinity for being bossed around in bed; it is about the only way I know to explain it right now. It’s called being a submissive, but I really don’t understand all the logistics of it.”

  Darrin stood stone-faced, unflinching from her scrutinizing gaze. After a few terse minutes had passed, Sara sighed as she walked passed Darrin to get her clothes from the bedroom. She had almost made it all the way inside the door when he reached out and grabbed her arm, halting her from getting inside the room. Trying to keep her tears at bay, Sara turned away from him, focusing on keeping the lump in her throat from choking her.

  Clearing his throat, Darrin tugged on her arm until she was close enough that he could grab her other arm to turn her so that they were standing toe to toe in the hallway. Sara didn’t want to acknowledge the disgust that more than likely would be evident in his eyes, so she kept her head turned. “Look at me, Sara.”

  Reacting without even knowing she was doing it, Sara found herself looking directly into the lust filled eyes of someone else, not the Darrin that she had come to know in the last couple of weeks. That guy was careful and cautious with her in bed; this guy looked almost pained, his facial muscles strained, and his breathing heavy as his shoulders animatedly rose and fell in rhythm. Darrin had started to clench and unclench his fists at his sides, making Sara look down to a very erect cock.

  “Back against the wall, Sara. Now.”

  Sara smiled as she gracefully stepped back to the wall, resuming her previous position. She wasn’t alone for long; Darrin was directly behind her, keeping his hands on her hips the entire time. Once her hands were firmly on the wall, legs shoulder-width apart, Darrin pulled back on her hips. Slowly, his hands traced her spine as she waited. He spread his fingers out and moved his hands around her ribcage, slowly moving to cup her breasts in his hands, his thumbs flicking her nipples.

  A moan escaped her lips as her hips started to move, slowly grinding her ass against Darrin’s strained cock. He faintly growled in her ear as he let go of her breasts, his hands fanned out under the swells. He pointed his hands downwards and inched them closer and closer to her mound. One hand left her front side and instead guided his cock from behind against her swollen folds. Sara knew that she was drenched with need, and he would be able to effortlessly slide inside.

  Darrin used his fingers to scissor over the top of her clit, pinching her clit as he filled her aching channel with his cock. The fingers of his free hand were now digging into her hip as he started to slowly move back and forth. Closing her eyes tightly, Sara leaned down even further, lifting her hips up so that Darrin didn’t have to bend his knees to lower himself. Once she could feel that he was firmly situated inside, she squeezed her internal muscles. “Pound me, Darrin. Please.”

  “Ah, Jesus, you are killin’ me, Sara.” He positioned his thumb directly over the top of her clit, gently rubbing at first, but then he pressed down enough to keep pressure on the erect nub. He bent over her even further, whispering in her ear, “Rest your forearms on the wall. Use them to cushion your head. I’m gonna drill you, baby.”

  Sara could feel her heart beating wildly in her chest as she quickly complied. No sooner did she get into position, than Darrin started to wildly piston in and out of her body, his balls slapping against her thighs with each plunge. The rhythm was causing a friction inside her body that was making her mind fuzzy; her thoughts were becoming muddled as she started to pant. An orgasm was starting to build, the crest getting closer and closer as he mercilessly pounded into her.

  Darrin was loudly using every profanity in his repertoire and it was lighting her fire even more that she had brought out his guttural, animalistic nature. Feeling brazen, Sara moved one arm from under her forehead, reaching down to pluck her own nipples. The lights in the hallway were on, making every movement they made obvious to the other. Darrin groaned as she writhed under him, pulling her nipples away from her body to the point of piercing pain.

  “So. Fucking. Hot.” His pace increased even more as he pau
sed to say each word. Sara could feel the tingles starting in her arms that signaled her explosion was close.

  “Ah Fuck, Sara. I’m gonna come. Come with me, baby.”

  Darrin roared his release as Sara felt wave after wave of a powerful orgasm course through her body. She could feel his cock spasm inside her, setting off another round of flutters across her skin. Slowly, Darrin pulled out, leaving his seed to run down her leg. Thank God she had been smart enough to get on birth control this spring and they had already discussed going bare, otherwise this would have been a problem for both of them.

  Darrin was panting as he stumbled to the bathroom. Sara’s legs felt like jelly, leaving her body to slowly crumple on the floor. She closed her eyes as she lay her head back, covering her face with her arm. Not having any energy left for modesty, she continued to lay naked in the hallway when Darrin came back out of the bathroom. He chuckled, as he quickly scooped her up in his arms, carrying her into the bedroom.

  Sara started to protest when he tried tucking her into bed, “I have to make supper, yet, Darrin. Plus, I’m a mess. I need to take a shower.”

  Darrin crawled over the top of her onto the other side of the bed, wrapping his arms around her before he pulled her back tightly against his chest. “We have leftovers we need to clean up before I leave tomorrow. A short nap will do us good, and then we can shower together.”

  Sara had almost forgotten that Darrin was leaving in the morning to go with some of his buddies to a remote cabin in northern Wisconsin for almost two weeks. It had been really nice having someone to spend time with, cook for, laugh with, and generally enjoy being with. It felt good. Really good. It was going to be hard to go back to being alone, if only for a couple of weeks.

  As if on cue, Darrin tightened his grip around her waist, tugging her briskly against him. “Hey, you’re gonna catch up on some sleep while I’m gone,” he teased, “I’ll be back before you know it.”