Gwyneira hesitated before she continued. “The lure of blood magic can become difficult to resist when fae start down that path. Some forego the crystals and begin to drink the blood directly from the vein.” My stomach churned at the imagery.
“It is a more concentrated dose, though it burns through the system just as quickly. Once they start drinking from the vein, there is no turning back. They will always feel called by the lure of blood, they cannot survive without it. We call them the dark fae. It is where the human myth of the vampire originates from,” she added helpfully as if to lighten the mood.
Unsure how to respond to what was probably going to be my future if anyone found out about my gift, I mechanically drank my tea without tasting it. If magic really was gifted by the gods, I had a bone to pick with them for landing me with this.
“You understand now why it is so important that we keep your gift a secret?” Gwyneira asked and I nodded mutely, lips pursed. “You must be able to block out emotions in a crowd. You cannot risk drawing attention to yourself by becoming overwhelmed.”
Gwyneira reached over and took the cup and saucer from my hands, placing them down on the table and looking at me intently. “I know I have painted a horrible picture, but I will never keep the truth from you, Ffion. For the remainder of our session and all of our future sessions, we will work on your mental walls.”
More determined than ever to master this, I spent the next thirty minutes in a meditation-like state, imagining constructing a 40-foot high wall of bricks piece-by-piece in my brain. Gwyneira projected her own emotions at me as powerfully as she could, the idea being they would bounce off the wall before I could feel them.
I didn’t want to give up hope, but the exercise had failed miserably. I experienced each emotion as acutely as I always did. If anything, they were exacerbated by my own despair. I left Gwyneira to go to the commons for dinner, hopeful I would at least see Marlen and have some small distraction from this terrible day.
◆◆◆
I was an emotional wreck at dinner. I sat with Leigh, Briallen and Marlen but my mind was a million miles away, spiralling through a terrifying vortex of bloody crystals and vampire fae.
My bad mood hadn’t gone unnoticed by Marlen. Every time I fidgeted uncomfortably in my seat or sighed under my breath, he’d give me a questioning look and press further into my side as if to physically offer me support. His concern swirled in my gut and it was both comforting and unsettling to know he cared about me.
“Foxglove, do you want to go for an evening walk? Just the two of us?” Marlen asked and I really wished at this moment that we had more subtle friends. Briallen and Leigh were waggling their eyebrows and winking all over the place.
“That sounds lovely, actually,” I said, giving him a small smile. I loved having Leigh and Briallen around. They unintentionally acted as chaperones when I was struggling to remember that I was supposed to be just friends with Marlen, but tonight I just really needed him. It’s like he read my mind.
We said our goodbyes and Marlen took my hand, linking his fingers through mine — another strike in the more than friends column. Leading me out of the commons, we started down a narrow path to the stream that ran across one edge of the campus. Marlen walked purposefully to a secluded spot next to the stream, hidden by a beautiful, enormous willow tree.
Marlen settled back against the base of a large willow tree and pulled me down between his legs, with my back against his chest. I cringed a little — this position was definitely more than just friendly. Screw it, it’s been a terrible day. I’m going to indulge just this once. I settled back and leaned my head against Marlen’s shoulder. As soon as I relaxed into his embrace, Marlen’s happiness burst through me and buzzed over my skin.
“What’s bothering you, foxglove?” Marlen said softly in my ear. I tensed up a little in his arms thinking about what to tell him and felt Marlen’s insecurity crawl over my skin. Most of the time I hated my abilities, but I loved that I had this insight into Marlen that no one else did.
There were several things bothering me that I could have told him about. Hiding my magic. Hating my magic. Fearing that someone already knew about my magic. Fearing whoever left those notes would resort to more drastic measures. Worrying about keeping him, Leigh and Briallen in the dark about my abilities… But I wasn’t ready to talk about any of those things yet.
But there was one thing bothering me that he could definitely help with...
“I guess I’m struggling a little with the mating pull,” I said slowly. Marlen’s insecurity felt like hundreds of snakes slithering over my skin, and I quickly grabbed his arms, pulling them tight around my waist to reassure him.
“Probably not in the way you’re thinking,” I added.
“Okay…what exactly are you struggling with? I want to help you Fi, make this easier however I can, you know that.” He tipped my chin towards his face, and I was glad there was only a small amount of moonlight to see by because my cheeks were flaming.
“Well, you know I have a strong pull towards both you and Bryn, and between the two of you, you’re both around a lot, so I feel it all the time and…” I trailed off awkwardly. I knew the exact moment Marlen cottoned on to what I was saying. His lust exploded and his grin stretched broadly across his face. Marlen leaned forward until his lips were right at my ear and I shuddered in anticipation.
“Are you feeling sexually frustrated, little foxglove?”
“Yes,” I said hotly. “Every time I feel the mating pull, it makes me all hot and bothered, and I’ve spent more time than I care to admit either taking a cold shower or getting myself off lately.”
I was briefly mortified that I’d admitted to Marlen that I’d been masturbating to thoughts of him and Bryn. I didn’t even like Bryn! But I couldn’t tell him that I also felt everyone else’s lust and being an academy of young adults, there was lust every-freaking-where. It also felt more potent when it was directed at me, and Marlen’s lust destroyed me on a daily basis.
Marlen made a low, growling sound in his chest that did fantastic things to my sex drive. “If you need to get off, foxglove, you come to me. And you’ll come for me; I will make sure of it.”
He ran his hands over my hips and down my thighs, rubbing circles over them with his thumbs, seemingly testing my response. I arched back into him, releasing a breathy sigh when I felt his hard-as-rocks erection rubbing against my ass.
“Say yes,” he murmured in my ear.
“Yes, oh yes,” I moaned breathily. Marlen made a purely masculine sound of satisfaction and gently pulled my dress above my hips.
I tipped my head back to capture his lips in a kiss that was far more x-rated than the sweet one we had shared a couple of nights ago. No one had ever kissed me like this before — it felt like he was trying to taste my very soul.
It was intoxicating and I knew that my feelings toward Marlen were going to be a whole lot more complicated by the end of the night. I wasn’t ready to officially pursue him as a mate and all that it entailed, but I couldn’t stomach the idea of sharing him either. It was selfish to expect so much from him and I hated myself for not being able to give him what he deserved.
As he devoured me with his kiss, Marlen’s stroking fingers worked his way up my thighs towards my panties, stroking me softly over the top of the thin, linen fabric. I knew he’d be able to tell how damp they were from that touch alone. Between him and Bryn, I basically walked around permanently wet these days.
“Foxglove,” he murmured against my lips. “Let me taste you.”
I felt my face heat up along with every other part of my body. My previous sexual encounters had been pretty clinical, oral had always felt way too intimate for what they were.
“I’ve never done that before,” I replied shyly, feeling Marlen’s lust and excitement spark up like a fireworks display.
“Then let me show you how good it feels. I’d be honored to be the first to taste you. I bet you taste like the heavens.”<
br />
I could hardly say no to that. Marlen shifted out from behind me and gently laid me back, moving between my legs and bending them at the knee. He leaned forward to give me another toe-curling kiss, our tongues intertwining and hands pulling roughly at each other.
Marlen pulled back and pressed traveling kisses and nips down my neck, lavishing attention on my breasts, then down my belly to my core. It felt like more than just him getting me off to relieve some frustration. Marlen was worshipping my body like I was his own personal goddess.
I felt awkward just lying back, staring up at the willow tree, so I propped myself up on my elbows to watch him. He undid the lace-up sides of my panties and grinned at me as he lowered his head towards my aching center. Holy mother of fairies, this was the sexiest thing I had ever seen.
Marlen licked slowly with the flat of his tongue before latching on to my overly-sensitive bundle of nerves and sucking. My eyes rolled back, and I bit down on my lip to stop myself from crying out since we were out in the open. Anyone could hear us. I’m pretty sure Marlen took that as a challenge. I felt his thrill of excitement as he inserted one long finger inside me, then adding a second and pumping them as he scraped his teeth lightly over my tingling nerves. His other hand had a firm grip on my inner thigh, fingers digging into my flesh, branding my skin.
Marlen found the perfect spot inside me with glorious precision and stroked it over and over until it felt like there was molten lava swirling through my whole body. Plunging his fingers into me once more and biting down gently, my orgasm ripped through me like a hurricane, my back arching and toes curling into the grass. Crying out loudly enough for everyone within ten feet to hear me, I came riding his fingers, his mouth devouring me.
I lay back on the grass, panting and struggling to catch my breath. Marlen, oozing satisfaction, held my eye while licking my juices off his fingers. It was kind of filthy and had me instantly ready for round two.
“You do taste heavenly, like honey and vanilla.”
He pulled himself up over my body and kissed me gently. I could taste myself on his tongue, and it brought out a primal, possessive feeling like I’d never experienced before. I always wanted him to taste like me, to smell like me. I wanted to scratch him and bite him and leave my marks all over his skin, so everyone knew he was mine.
“I already want more. I won’t ever be able to get enough of you,” Marlen said softly against my lips. Unsure how to respond, I buried my face in his neck, too awkward to look him in the eye.
“Sorry, sorry. I didn’t mean to freak you out with my affection,” Marlen chuckled and tipped my chin up to kiss me again.
“Thank you for being patient with me,” I whispered.
“Always, foxglove,” he smiled.
Fi
I woke up to a persistent banging on my cabin door obscenely early, well before the bells were due to chime, feeling both exhausted and still kind of tingly from last night.
“Fi! I know you’re in there!”
“Briallen?” I shuffled my way over to the door and unbolted it, stepping back so she could come in. I’d gotten paranoid about locking the place up as tight as I could since both messages had been delivered to my cabin.
Briallen breezed in with a plate of breakfast food she must have snagged at the commons and immediately started stoking the fire to make us tea. I don’t know how she had so much energy at 6 am. I was still shuffling around like a corpse, contemplating whether or not it would be rude to just go back to bed and ignore her.
“So?” She spun around and pinned me with a look. “Tell me all about it!”
“All about what?”
“You and Marlen! You went for that ‘walk’ last night.” She put ‘walk’ in air quotes and rolled her eyes as if it was the most absurd thing she’d ever heard. “Did you indulge in a little try before you buy?”
“Briallen!” I screeched. This girl. She seemed so sweet and innocent but it was all just a cover for the gossiping nympho she was at heart.
“We didn’t have sex if that’s what you’re asking. Though we did have fun,” I mumbled. I’m not sure I would ever adopt the cool-about-sex attitude of the fae.
She squealed, her excitement buzzing intensely over my skin, and flung her arms around my neck. “Progress! This is so great. You are so well matched. I can’t wait until it’s official.”
“Marlen is wonderful. I’m fortunate to have a connection with someone like him.” I smiled at her enthusiasm, leaving out the part where I didn’t think I would ever be able to take things any further because my gift was a curse, and I didn’t want it to grow any stronger. She finished brewing the tea and set up breakfast for us on the little table while I dug around in my wardrobe for an outfit.
“Perhaps now you’re progressing things with Marlen, Bryn will get his act together too? I’m sure it grates on him seeing the two of you together.” Briallen looked at me conspiratorially and I laughed.
“No thanks. He and his mood swings can stay the heck away from me. I know he’s your cousin and all but honestly, B. Brooding is only sexy to a point.” Also, he may be threatening me but she probably didn’t want to hear that.
She laughed, not in the least bit offended. “I totally get it, and I’m not pushing you to pursue him. Bryn’s story is his to tell but you should know that his parents had a strong mating pull and their story has a tragic ending. I think it’s fear that keeps him away from you. He doesn’t want to let himself feel the kind of connection that destroyed his family.”
Even though we would never be together, the idea of him suffering made my chest ache. It could have been the mating pull dictating my response, but I wasn’t entirely sure that was true. Maybe it was my own empathic nature. Or maybe I just had a hidden soft spot for the fire fae that I didn't like to acknowledge.
“No one knows better than me how hard he can be to put up with. But I’m also not giving up hope.” Briallen winked, and we giggled our way through breakfast as she told me about her and Leigh’s various sexcapades around campus in case I needed to find a discrete spot in future. Thank the magical fae gods for girlfriends.
We packed up our breakfast and finished getting ready together before heading out to class.
I had my first-year air mastery class first thing, it had been the only thing giving me hope that I wasn’t a complete waste of magical space. As the toxins from Albion had cleared from my system, Master Aures had allowed me to participate fully in class and I found myself having increasingly accurate control over my air magic. I could now easily control gusts to push items away from me and pull them back.
Marlen had mentioned that in the third year, we would use air to control our jumps from the tallest trees and by fourth year, I’d have enough control to create an air bubble around my head and breathe underwater. It was a great incentive to keep practicing.
The other elemental classes may as well have been theoretical for the amount of magic I managed to produce in them. Not that anyone without an affinity for the element was able to do much. They could at least grow and shrink candle flames, create whirlpools in their water basins and bring flower buds into bloom. I hadn’t accomplished any of those milestones yet. It didn’t look like I’d be leaving the first-year class any time soon.
Feeling irritable after another pointless session staring at my unmoving basin of water, my mood brightened considerably when I spotted Marlen heading over to me in the commons. Now I wasn’t fighting the mating pull from Marlen; it felt like a comforting weight in my chest, rather than a knotted ache as it still did whenever I saw Bryn. Mainly when I saw him with Saffir, which was more often than not. You’d think spending time with his girlfriend would perk him up, but if anything, he was more furious than ever these days. They did seem less touchy-feely now though, maybe there was trouble in paradise.
Marlen greeted me with a kiss on the temple, immediately wrapping his arm around my shoulders. It was even harder now to be around each other without touching, maybe because we’d
taken things further last night? I wanted to blame it all on the mating pull, but Marlen was sexy as hell, and I wanted to touch him, mating pull be damned.
Now my post-orgasm haze had well and truly faded, my guilt at going further with him without being honest about what he was getting himself into was eating me alive.
“Foxglove, you’re thinking so hard; I’m even getting a headache,” Marlen complained. “Come on, I told you I’d show you the library some time, right? Let’s head over there now. Then we can get some blackcurrant tea and turn that brain of yours off for a few minutes.” I grimaced at the thought of that ghastly tea, but Marlen’s words had cheered me up a little. I would tell him everything. Soon.
The library was a stone, circular building. I must have walked past it 50 times but I’d assumed it was just another classroom since it was so small. The walls were lined with old books from floor to ceiling, and there were wooden shelves down the middle housing more rows of ancient tomes.
I was hoping for a Beauty and the Beast library moment and this… definitely was not it. But I was still excited to explore the books. Marlen must have noticed my disappointment, he gently turned me toward him, resting his hands on my shoulders.
“Not what you had in mind?” he asked slowly, a thread of vulnerability in his voice. I instantly felt guilty. He had been really thoughtful bringing me here and I was being an ungrateful brat about it.
“I’m sorry,” I told him sincerely. “I’m excited, I promise. It’s just human libraries are huge, and I guess I was expecting a bigger building is all. I can’t wait to start reading though,” I added hastily.
Marlen gave me one of his warm, genuine smiles. The kind he only gave his sister and Leigh and Briallen, his two best friends. Everyone else got his cocksure, playboy grin. That one did spectacular things for my sex drive, but his honest-to-god smile turned me to mush.
“Books are rare in Avalon, foxglove. Paper is pretty scarce. This right here is probably the largest collection of books in one place in the whole realm,” he explained.
The Terrible Gift (Empath Found Book 1) Page 9
