As we neared the commons hand-in-hand, I was relieved to see that the message in the grass had been cleaned up, I guess by someone with an earth affinity. There was no evidence it even existed except for the lingering stares and the stabbing feeling in my head. All day, I’d expected a note from Gwyneira asking me to come and see her about the message but I hadn’t received anything. Did that mean I was right to suspect her? Or was she just giving me space to process? My head throbbed even harder. What to do about Gwyneira would have to be tomorrow’s problem.
Marlen snuck us into the commons using one of the back entrances and sat me at a table by the wall where Briallen and Leigh were already waiting for us with plates of food. Clearly, they’d coordinated all of this and I loved them for it.
I felt the second pull that usually indicated Bryn's presence, and my heart sank. Usually by the time I felt his presence, he was already halfway gone, which I doubted was coincidental. I felt terrible about our confrontation this morning, but my guilt had lessened a bit over the day. It was mostly replaced with anger.
What right did Bryn have to demand answers of me anyway? What right did he have to be mad at me for not trusting him when he had never given me a reason to? Yes, he brought me here, but that was an assignment he undertook on Gwyneira’s orders, not an act of kindness. Yes, we felt a mating pull, but neither of us had ever acted on it or given any indication we ever would. I didn’t owe him anything. I regretted making him feel bad but I didn’t regret keeping him out of a loop he had no right to be in.
I chanced a glance across the room where Bryn was leaning a little too casually against the wall, arms crossed, and leg propped up. He wasn’t looking at me, but that felt intentional too. He obviously knew I was here. His gaze followed Saffir’s sashaying figure, slinking up to him in an indecently tight, short linen dress that I’m pretty sure was meant as sleepwear. My eyes narrowed. What was he playing at?
As Saffir got close to him, he reached out one hand to grab the back of her head, tangling into her hair and pulling her face forward to kiss her deeply. His other hand rested possessively on the curve of her ass, and she gripped his shirt tight, pulling them closer together. Even in a crowded room, I felt the thrill of her conquest and swell of her lust. It made my stomach turn.
Saffir and Bryn weren’t a new thing, but somehow I knew that little show had been for my benefit. I just didn’t understand why. I had never tried to pursue the mating bond with Bryn, so I shouldn’t care what or who he did.
Why did he choose this way to hurt me?
Why did Bryn’s cuts leave such deep scars?
Why, when Saffir’s lust was so potent, didn’t I sense any from Bryn?
As Bryn passed our table on his way to the buffet, Briallen’s hand shot out to grip his arm, her knuckles turning white from the effort.
“What was that about?” she hissed, more venom in her tone than I’d ever heard. I could barely feel my heart splintering into a million pieces, Briallen’s anger was so distracting. Why am I so heartbroken anyway?
Bryn and I are not a thing.
“What was what about?” Bryn drawled lazily. His bored tone raised everyone else’s ire but I could sense his tension and bitterness. I wish I knew what they meant.
“That little display with Saffir!” Briallen whisper shouted, her cheeks flushed with anger.
“Is there something wrong with me kissing the girl I’m courting? As I recall, Leigh couldn’t keep his hands off you when he was your suitor and I was courteous enough not to complain about it,” he replied flatly, his jaw ticking.
“You’re courting her now?” Briallen confirmed hoarsely as ice wrapped around my heart. I didn’t know who the emotions belonged to, it was too numbing to pinpoint. Surely it wasn’t mine?
Unwilling to participate in this awful charade any longer, I stood up silently and made my way back through the exit, Marlen following behind me, unquestioning. I was starving but it wasn’t worth staying to eat. Bryn had brought a lot of attention to our table and my head was starting to ache. I’d probably be sick if I tried to force food down anyway.
Marlen and I walked back to the cabin in silence while I berated myself for my stupid feelings. Bryn wasn’t mine to lose, he never had been. Just because we had kindred souls and our magic was trying to push us together didn’t mean we were meant to be. It didn’t even mean we liked each other because we absolutely didn’t.
Ugh, had I not basically accused him of threatening me just a few hours ago? Obviously that was going to be the death knell in the relationship that never was.
I shook my head to clear my thoughts and gave Marlen a brief, reassuring smile to let him know I was okay.
Bryn didn’t have the right to be upset about my choices, and I had no right to be upset about his.
◆◆◆
I’d slept like the dead in Marlen’s arms, emotionally exhausted from the fucking nightmare that had been my day yesterday. Unwilling to risk another passive-aggressive showdown in the commons with Bryn, I’d chickened out and asked Marlen to grab food for me which I ate on the way to class.
My classmates were still giving off a strange mixture of emotions directed at me. Not enough to overwhelm my senses but still definitely uncomfortable. Fortunately, notices had been put up around the campus yesterday afternoon announcing that students were invited to a masque ball that would take place in a few weeks to officially open the Avalon Fair and that had taken the heat off me. I was much less interesting than a ball.
As I entered the first-year air elemental class, Master Aures pulled me aside before I had a chance to sit down.
“Ffion, I think you would be better suited to Master Drysi's second-year air class. Your control is coming along well, and the teaching assistant for Master Drysi’s class has agreed to tutor you separately if they feel you need it.”
“Oh, well, that’s good news. Right?” I had been enjoying first-year air mastery. It was nice to have one class where I felt like I was doing well instead of tossing weak, ineffective magic at everything.
“It’s excellent news,” she smiled, and I felt a hint of pride coming from her. “You are taking to air faster than we had anticipated, and now you are ready for a greater challenge. You should head to your new class now. It’s right across the clearing.”
At least I was one step closer to catching up with my age group. I rushed across the clearing to a similar, open-air wooden building, already late for class. Master Drysi didn’t seem surprised to see me, which was a relief. She was a statuesque, intimidating woman, with a severe black bob and crystalline blue eyes. Her outfit was similar to what the boys wore, loose, brown linen trousers with a white tunic over top. Master Drysi was the first fae woman I’d seen who didn’t have long hair and wasn’t wearing a dress. Maybe she was a warrior? She had a warrior-kind of vibe and no-nonsense disposition. I liked her straight away.
Two steps into the classroom and the now-familiar magnetic pull hit me right in my chest. I looked around, assuming Bryn or Marlen were here but confused as to why, when I realized the scent surrounding me wasn’t Bryn’s bonfire embers or Marlen’s woodsy pine. It was a seductive icy smell, like the breeze off the mountain after a fresh snowfall and it had me practically salivating. The drool situation wasn’t helped when I saw who the scent belonged to.
His skin was a shade darker than mine; a rich coffee color, contrasting with his brilliant silver eyes. His hair was thick and black, cropped short on the sides with longer, messy pieces on top. My eyes drifted enviously to his cheekbones, they were sharp enough to cut glass. His dark stubble looked more like an afterthought than Marlen’s tidy scruff. Like he'd gotten so absorbed in his studies that he’d just forgotten to shave. While he seemed studious and academic, I felt like there was a dangerous edge to him that perhaps not everyone saw. I hoped they didn’t. I had an overwhelming urge to want his that side of him for myself.
His eyes cataloged every inch of me, filled with heat but also assessing. I had been so
absorbed in this feeling that I hadn’t realized how close we were standing. We must have gravitated toward each other unconsciously.
“Ffion, this is my teaching assistant, Arthus Calder.” Master Drysi’s eyes twinkled with amusement. I guess Arthus and I’s response to each wasn’t particularly subtle.
“Fi,” I corrected absentmindedly.
Arthus’ eyes never left mine. “Pleasure to meet you,” he murmured softly, and the deep, silky timbre of his voice had my already overstimulated nerves firing up again. Blinking away some of my lust haze, I focused on his emotions to try to get a read on him. The last thing I needed in my life was another Bryn.
Fortunately, Arthus was mostly a mixture of curiosity and lust, but he was also wound so tight, I could feel his self-control. I’d never felt anything like it. Arthus must be incredibly disciplined to maintain that level of control almost unconsciously. I was both relieved and disappointed when I didn’t feel any excitement from him like I had from Marlen when we met. I didn’t want this whole mating thing anyway. Right? Right.
Arthus stayed close to me throughout the air mastery class. He was quiet but it didn’t feel awkward, I think he was just quiet by nature. He was careful not to make any kind of physical contact, but corrected my technique and explained things so well that by the end of class, I was weaving my feather pretty smoothly around the small obstacle course of hoops and sticks we had set up on my desk. I was a teeny bit proud of myself, even though the obstacle course Master Drysi had set up for me was clearly easier than what my classmates had. She watched me work, and I felt that she was impressed.
“Excellent control, Ffion. Moving you up to the second-year class was the right call. However, I think you could benefit from some additional tutoring sessions with Arthus, at least for a few weeks, to ensure you’re caught up with your fellow students. Perhaps twice a week?”
I looked to Arthus automatically. I didn’t want him to be stuck with me if it made him uncomfortable. His face gave nothing away, but I felt a small wave of satisfaction roll off him that made my little affection-seeking heart light up.
“Of course. I would be happy to tutor Ffion.” I smothered a grin as I agreed to the tutoring sessions because I really didn’t need to be going around smiling like an idiot and scaring him off. I had a feeling I would often by trying to keep my cool around Arthus, and I made it my goal to use our tutoring sessions to crack a little of his composure.
◆◆◆
“How was your air mastery class?” Marlen’s voice startled me as he dropped down into the seat next to me in the commons. I’d been so absorbed in my thoughts about Arthus that I hadn’t felt him approach.
“Oh, it was good. I’m in Master Drysi’s second-year class now. They thought I was making good progress.”
“That’s great news, little foxglove. I thought you would be happy about that? You seem nervous.” He leaned in, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and landed an affectionate kiss on the tip of my nose.
“I’m not nervous…” I trailed off, not knowing the etiquette for telling one of my suitors that I’d felt a mating pull as strong as his to someone else. Would Marlen be jealous? Did he know Arthus? I’d already met most of Marlen’s friends around the Academy. Did they not know each other or worse, not like each other?
“What’s on your mind, foxglove? You know you can always talk to me,” Marlen asked softly, his insecurity crawling unpleasantly up my skin. Right, I guess we were doing this then. Probably best to just rip the band-aid off.
“I felt a strong mating pull in my air class,” I mumbled to my bowl of cold bean salad, “and it wasn’t you or Bryn.” Still unable to make eye contact, I paid close attention to Marlen’s emotions instead. I braced myself for anger or jealousy, but all I found was curiosity and a touch of excitement. Weird. Fae are weird.
“You can’t just leave it there, foxglove! Who was it? I hope I know him.”
“Arthus, the teaching assistant.” Marlen made a choking noise, and I felt his surprise as his excitement levels rose.
“Really? Foxglove, that’s amazing. Arthus only graduated last year. We were both students for the past three years. I don’t really know him, but he never appeared to feel a mating pull towards anyone. Girls followed him around with stars in their eyes for years, but he’s never shown an interest.”
That made me feel all kinds of warm and fuzzy until I remembered that Arthus seemed kind of distant with me too. Maybe he just didn’t want a mate? Or had whatever problem Bryn had?
“Isn’t it, er, weird that he’s....you know…” I trailed off, face flaming.
“That he’s what, Fi?” Marlen asked, his confusion washing through me like a wave of dizziness.
“A teaching assistant,” I whispered, mortified.
“What?” Marlen blurted. “Why would that matter?”
“Um, that’s a huge deal with humans. He’s part of the staff, it would be super frowned upon,” I told Marlen, brows furrowed. Why was he looking at me like I was the weird one here?
Marlen laughed, a proper belly-rubbing, keeling over kind of laugh. I was deeply unimpressed.
“Sorry, foxglove. I thought you might have been joking? No?” he chuckled again and some of my annoyance faded. It was impossible to stay mad at Marlen.
“Teaching assistants aren’t really in authority positions here, only the masters are. Masters aren’t eligible to teach unless they’re fully mated so that isn’t really a problem,” he explained. “The teaching assistants are usually graduates who were the top of their classes and have an interest in pursuing teaching one day. When they’re fully mated too.”
“So it’s normal for teaching assistants to meet potential mates among the students? Theoretically,” I added hastily and Marlen gave me a knowing smile.
“Normal is probably not the right word, most fae meet their mates during their four years at the Academy. Arthus didn’t for whatever reason, probably because he has strong magic and there wasn’t a female on campus powerful enough to balance it until you,” he said, shrugging like it wasn’t a huge deal. “That’s how it was for me anyway, and probably for Bryn though he’ll never admit it. Your magic is incredibly powerful, foxglove.”
“Then Arthus has a gift too?”
“An exceptionally rare gift, he didn’t mention it?” Marlen asked.
“No? I mean, I know he has an air affinity, but we didn’t talk about anything else. I figured if I asked him about his magic, he might ask about mine, and I definitely don’t know him well enough to talk about that…”
“Good call, foxglove. Arthus’ gift is well-known throughout the Academy. You’ll definitely see it for yourself at some point since they appear when he’s frustrated or angry or experiencing any kind of high emotional state.”
“They…?”
“His wings.” I stared at Marlen.
“He doesn’t have wings,” I said blandly, “I’m sure I would have noticed that.”
Marlen smiled indulgently like I was the cutest thing he’d ever seen. “They’re hidden most of the time. He retracts them when he's not using them to keep them safe. Fae wings are incredibly rare nowadays, and I’m sure he’s been hunted for his before. There are plenty of people who would kill him for them. They’re worth a lot.”
“That’s awful,” I muttered, knowing exactly how it felt to have rare and desirable magic. “Maybe that’s why he’s pursued a mating pull before? If he has been hunted, I’m sure he has some concerns about getting close to someone and making himself vulnerable. I’m not sure I would acknowledge the mating pull at all if everyone knew about my magic, I wouldn’t trust that they were pursuing me for the right reasons.”
I could feel Marlen’s insecurities slithering over my skin again. “I don’t mean you, Marlen. I am pretty attuned to your emotions at this point anyway. If you were duplicitous, I would pick up on it.”
“Thanks. I think?” he said drolly, but his mood did improve. “Anyway, Arthus will probably be hard to get
close to — if you do intend to pursue him — but I think you’ll find you have a lot in common once you get talking. When you’re ready to tell him about your magic, I’m sure he’ll understand the obstacles you’re facing a lot better than I do.”
“Well, fortunately for me, I have private tutoring sessions with him twice a week to get me up to speed on second-year air magic.”
Marlen waggled his eyebrows, “I think you’ll find that ends up being fortunate for both of you, little foxglove.” I laughed, feeling a lot better having talked to Marlen about Arthus and seeing his reaction. I wanted to talk to him more but Leigh and Briallen joined us at the table at that moment.
“How was your day?” Briallen asked cheerily.
“No more messages?” Leigh enquired around a mouthful of a mushroom wrap.
“Great, no messages.” I smiled. “I got moved up to the second-year air mastery class, the masters think I’m making good progress with my air magic.”
“That’s wonderful, Fi!” Briallen’s infectious excitement wrapped around me like a familiar blanket.
“Second-year with Master Drysi?” Leigh asked around another mouthful of mushrooms. I wrinkled my nose at him and he swallowed, grinning at me.
“That’s the one.”
“I heard Arthus came back this year to assist for that class?” Leigh’s question was directed at Marlen. It would make sense for Leigh to know Arthus since they were both air mastery and only one year apart.
Marlen looked at me to respond, raising a brow in question. I appreciated him deferring to me, I wasn’t ready to tell Leigh and Briallen about the mating pull I felt to Arthus yet. My gut told me to let Arthus take the lead.
“Arthus is the teaching assistant for that class,” I responded vaguely, grateful when Briallen changed the topic of conversation to the upcoming masque ball.
“What will you wear, Fi?” Briallen asked excitedly. “I think I might go as a unicorn, the whites and silvers will go well with my hair.”
The Terrible Gift (Empath Found Book 1) Page 14
