by C. J. Anaya
The path of least resistance seemed mighty tempting at the moment.
Unfortunately, even though I didn’t remember anything about my life before two days ago, the idea of giving in to the darkness and taking the easier path didn’t seem like my typical move.
I was a fighter. I was a survivor. I handled the tough stuff head on.
Ideally.
“Tell me,” I repeated, ready to face the ugly truth.
Kheelan swallowed hard, looked to my father for help, but my father’s eyes, though they held sympathy, also seemed to be saying the choice was up to Kheelan. And none of it made sense to me.
“Not yet,” Kheelan said. “I can’t tell her yet. I need more time to make her mine, to give her the chance to fall for me. If she loves me on her own then the truth won’t be so difficult to accept.”
“You’re sure you won’t tell her now?”
“No. After we’re married. I’ll tell her everything.”
“I don’t understand what’s going on,” I said, “but neither one of you have the right to dictate my life or my choices. Whatever it is you’re hiding from me you need to tell me. You need to trust that I can make the hard decisions on my own. I won’t accept this, Kheelan.” I grabbed his hand to get him to look at me. “You’ll tell me now or you’ll have the fight of your life on your hands, and I won’t consider, for even one moment, falling for you again.”
Kheelan’s eyes filled with admiration even though his smile was tainted with defeat. He reached out and caressed my cheek, his touch igniting a small fire within my heart.
“You’re fierce and you’re brave, Crysta. It’s what drew me to you from the start, and I promise once we’re married you will know everything you need to know.” He turned to look at my father. “I won’t tell her until the vows are said. She may never forgive me for this duplicity, Rodri, but it’s the only way we can save her life.”
My father nodded. “You know what to do.”
Kheelan turned back to me. He lifted his hand and placed it gently against my temple.
“Kheelan?”
The sadness in his eyes was also mixed with a resigned determination. I didn’t like it one bit.
“Obliviscatur,” he whispered.
A subtle burn began at the base of my neck, slowly traveling up my scalp until it settled within my brain. I felt a soft tug and then a swift jerk, followed by extreme dizziness. I rapidly blinked my eyes until the dizziness passed. Kheelan came into focus, his gentle touch feeling cool against my heated cheek.
“I’m sorry,” I said, realizing I must have lost the thread of the conversation for a moment. “Did you ask me something?”
Kheelan rested his head against my forehead and let out a shaky breath.
“I just wanted to know if the pain has lessened at all?”
“No,” I said, feeling as if I’d lost more than a few seconds of time, but unsure as to how that was possible. “Your healing spells help temporarily, but then the pain starts to creep in after a few minutes. Maybe Chuck can stab me in the chest again.”
My father chuckled. “I’m not really sure how I feel about that alternative.”
“Rest now,” Kheelan said. He gently lowered me back to the bed and arranged the covers as I moved to get comfortable. Comfortable being relative in this case. There was no way I’d sleep with how ill I felt.
Chuck fluttered from my feet to my chest and rested his head against me, creating a warmth that stole away some of the pain.
Kheelan then stood and walked over to my father.
“I hated doing that to her,” he said in a whisper.
Doing what? Tucking me in? With how hot I felt the blankets didn’t seem like a necessity.
My father nodded.
They remained somber for a moment as my blurry gaze tried to puzzle out their troubled mood. I knew our situation was a bit precarious, but was there a chance I wouldn’t get better?
Kheelan exhaled and swiftly changed topic.
“You need to see King Vargis as soon as possible. If you can convince him to give us his vote many more will fall in line.”
“I know. I can’t put this off any longer. I’ve already petitioned an audience with him. It will take some time before I hear back. I also have several lesser royals to persuade. I most likely won’t be back for a few weeks. Until then, keep my daughter safe.”
“I will.”
My father turned and walked toward the door leading out to…well, I wasn’t exactly sure where it led.
“Be careful,” Kheelan said.
“You have two months, Kheelan, but it must happen with or without her affection.”
Curious.
He quickly left, shutting the door firmly behind him. A light blue light shimmered around the door, creating a cloak of invisibility to anyone on the outside, a tricky illusion spell Kheelan had explained to me during one of my more lucid moments.
He returned to me, running his cool fingers over my fevered brow, but it wasn’t enough to distract me from my father’s last words.
What had to happen two months from now?
Sweat trickled down my spine and my body shook as icy tendrils of agony wrapped their way around my nerves. Kheelan led me from the safety and security of our hidden home with a surprising goal in mind.
Assistance.
He’d slumped over with relief once my father left. Then he said some of the Fae races who were willing to fight on our side had talented healers who might be able to heal me. It was time to enlist their help now.
Huh. Why had he taken so long to bring up that particular option?
Once I realized he wanted me to actually get up and leave the safety of our dwelling I hesitated to comply. I was absolutely terrified of being discovered by Jareth, but his insistence that these healers might be able to end the pain once and for all gave me enough motivation to combat my fear.
Chuck couldn’t come with us. Kheelan was afraid my familiar would misinterpret the healers’ motives and attack them since he seemed to be highly overprotective when it came to me. I hadn’t really liked the idea of leaving Chuck behind. He hadn’t liked it either, giving Kheelan an angry snort as the door closed before he could follow.
“He’ll be fine,” Kheelan assured me, taking my hand and leading me out of my room…and into a dark, dank, cavern.
The difference between my cozy, hospitable dwelling, and the creepy, jagged walls of the cave made me cringe. I threw myself against the mahogany door behind me, terrified of my new surroundings.
Kheelan immediately gathered me in his arms as my breathing turned into labored gasps.
“Crysta, slow your breathing and relax for a moment. Remember, I told you we were hiding within the sprite mines.”
I gripped him around the waist like he was the only lifeline I had pulling me to safety. He was familiar, comfortable, and secure. I tried to block out the notion that the heavy rock walls pressed in on me and focused on the rise and fall of Kheelan’s chest as he helped me match my breaths to his.
Man did this suck. I wasn’t so sure I wanted help from these healers anymore
Once the panic finally subsided, he pulled back to study me, brushing away a few tears. Had I always been this wimpy and weepy? Granted, it had only been two days, but I just felt so lost and insecure. My emotions couldn’t get a handle on the blank void that made up my lack of memories.
There’s nothing more terrifying than forgetting who you are.
“I had no idea you got claustrophobic, Crysta,” he said, studying me with kind eyes.
“I never did before?”
His shifted uneasily before pulling me against his chest and resting his chin on my head.
“Of course, when you were little. It hasn’t bothered you for a very long time.”
“Oh.”
I didn’t know what else to say.
“I know this is the first time you’re seeing the tunnels of the mines, but I assure you the place is quite safe. And we really need
to talk to a healer within our ranks. It will help ease your pain and suffering.”
“Who are our ranks exactly?”
Kheelan released me and held out his hand. I quickly took it, trusting him completely, and reveling in the comfort his touch provided. I couldn’t say I remembered Kheelan or what he meant to me before my memory loss, but in the last two days, he had been so kind and loving as he took care of me. I could easily see now why I’d fallen in love with him. I just wasn’t sure how I felt about loving him now.
“We have several races on our side, ready to fight against my father. Most of them don’t need to go into hiding at the moment since their true loyalties have not yet been discovered, but the Stargis race are hidden here within the mines.”
“Why? Wouldn’t it be better for them to go along as if they aren’t loyal to us?”
“Unfortunately, the Stargis king was labeled a sympathizer to our cause. Their race has taken refuge here ever since.”
I carefully stepped over a deep groove in the floor as Kheelan grabbed a torch on the wall, muttered a spell, and lit it on fire. My breath caught in the back of my throat to see him work such wonderful magic.
According to Kheelan, I was also a powerful faerie capable of wielding Winter magic, but my illness had prevented me from learning how to use my powers again. I was a little discouraged to think that I’d been trained all my life to wield magic as one of the most powerful royals in the realm, and now I remembered nothing of my training. I couldn’t remember a single spell.
“And you think there are healers among them who could help me until the side effects go away?”
He squeezed my hand and I felt my jitters subside once again. Contact with Kheelan tended to do that for me. Made me feel safe. I tried not to analyze that too much, but I figured it must have made me feel safe before my life became one big question mark.
“I do. We’ll go deeper into the mine and ask for their assistance. Do you still have the stone I gave you?”
I nodded, reaching into my pants’ pocket and running my thumb over the smooth amber stone. He’d given it to me just before we left, telling me it would aid the healing process. I had no idea how a simple stone would be capable of that, but whatever. No sense in questioning the expert. Each time I touched it, the body aches died down a bit so there was definitely something to this stone. I trusted Kheelan, too. Trusted him with my life. I couldn’t help it. No matter how blank my memory, his features seemed so familiar to me. I felt a hollow echo of something like love every time I looked at him. Did that mean my heart recognized him even if my mind still came up empty?
The long tunnel we followed took a sharp left and opened up into a round cavern with three separate entrances to three more tunnels. I breathed a sigh of relief for a moment, allowing my neck muscles to relax in an area that felt less oppressive. Kheelan noticed and placed a comforting arm around my shoulder.
“I know this isn’t easy for you. I promise this next tunnel won’t be as long as the first. If you feel short of breath, just tell me, and I’ll hold you until you can breathe easy again.”
I searched his face for any signs of annoyance because I was definitely slowing our progress, but all I saw there was concern. I hesitantly reached my hand up to caress his cheek. It was the first time I had initiated contact since losing my memory. His eyes widened in surprise. He lifted his hand to mine and turned his cheek into my touch, closing his eyes and reveling in this first offering of affection. A tiny tingle skipped along my hand as he kissed my palm and reached for my waist, sliding his arm around me and gently pulling me flush with his chest. He rested his forehead against mine and breathed me in.
Okay, maybe spending time with Kheelan wasn’t going to be as awkward as I’d foreseen.
“Do you have any idea how good it feels when you touch me like that?” he asked.
“I take it, I haven’t done that in some time?”
“You have no idea,” he said.
His lips were inches from mine, but he didn’t move to kiss me. He hadn’t kissed me since the first night I woke up and told him the intimacy was just too much for me. I needed time. I had to remember.
It hurt him. The pain in his eyes let me know I didn’t usually withhold anything from him, but we were going to have to start all over again, and if he truly wanted to make this work he had to be patient.
I thought he would get angry with me, but he took everything I said easily enough. He maintained a healthy distance from me unless I needed him to hold me through the worst of the pain.
I’d grown comfortable in his arms, but I didn’t think I was ready to be kissed by him again. When I didn’t make a move to close the distance between us he leaned back and let out a heavy sigh.
“I’m sorry,” I said. Guilt landed me a sucker punch.
He tilted my chin up, his eyes filled with nothing but love.
“You never need to apologize to me, Crysta. I can be patient. I can wait.”
For some reason, this conversation felt familiar. I had to wonder if I’d made him wait the first time we started…dating. Is that what we were doing now?
In a sprite mine?
“We’re going to take the middle tunnel, Crysta.”
“Where do the other tunnels lead to?”
He took my hand and led me through the tunnel in the middle before answering.
“We’ll need to stay away from the left and right tunnels. Your father and I have placed magical traps within them to deter any unwanted visitors from venturing deeper into this area of the mines.
Right. No venturing forth into dangerous territory. Not that I’d be doing much venturing on my own anyway.
Our pace was slow and stilted, which was entirely my fault. My aching body and my bouts of claustrophobia did not make for a speedy stroll down the tunnel. At one point, my body was so overcome with chills I had to hold still as Kheelan used his Summer magic to heat my skin. My latest physical reaction to the magical severing worried him. He muttered something about Winter faeries incapable of having chills and scooped me into his arms, rushing down the tunnel.
After a few more minutes of this, the tunnel opened up and brought us to a long ledge overlooking what appeared to be an encampment nearly twenty feet below.
The cavern was absolutely enormous, housing a city built within the craggy walls of the Sprite Mines. Rows upon rows of crude structures carved from black stone filled the outer walls of the cavern. Toward the far back, high above the city, a sparkling spring of water descended into a large pool where faeries of varying ages with green, leather-like skin and flat features gathered water, washed, and played.
The only sunlight came from a clear roof of crystal above the cavern. I couldn’t tell if the material had been constructed by nature or magic, but the effect was stunning. The middle of the city held no houses at all. Instead, there was a rectangular stone altar that stood about three feet high. It was just as crudely constructed as the other dwellings, but it seemed to be the very focal point of the city.
Despite the children playing in the spring, the atmosphere felt somber and oppressive. These people had lost all hope at some point, and I ached for them. I wanted to help them.
I continued to study the beings moving around their makeshift dwellings, trying to pinpoint the source of their despair, but my vision suddenly blurred and something cold seized my chest. Several of the Stargis race fell to their knees, grabbing at their own chests, almost as if they were experiencing the symptoms of my illness.
My equilibrium decided to take a vacation. Kheelan held me tight as my knees buckled.
“Dammit,” he said. “We’re running out of time.”
After that, things got crazy. Somehow we got off that ledge and into the city. I wasn’t really paying attention since it felt like my core was on fire. Kheelan shouted, requesting someone by the name of Zauhn who unceremoniously pulled me from Kheelan and carried me toward that strange altar. He set me down as gently as he could, but nothing could ke
ep me from crying out in pain.
“Crysta, this is Zauhn. He’s the leader of the Stargis race and a healer. I promise he is going to help you.”
“Why did you not bring her sooner?” Zauhn asked.
More shouting, then a desperate discussion about core magic and how to give it back to the Stargis race.
“You said you wouldn’t hurt our king. We have cooperated thus far because of your promise,” said a raspy voice.
More muffled voices and then Kheelan shouted, “If you don’t take it back she will die. Release her from this burden. You must know how to do this.”
“Graul is the only one who can, Kheelan. He is the heir.” Zauhn made a gurgled coughing sound, which was the same sound I happened to be making.
“That’s not an option,” Kheelan said, anger filling his words. “I don’t understand why you can’t take it and assimilate it into your own core.”
“That’s not how…the transfer of power w-works…among our people.”
He talked more about absorbing magic as the only option available, but I couldn’t follow the conversation. I wasn’t even sure the conversation was really happening. That’s how out of it I felt. Also, I didn’t know who Graul was, and I had no idea what absorbing magic had to do with healing my illness.
“No,” Kheelan shouted. “If she absorbs it she’ll die.”
“She will die either way, and so will we,” Zauhn said his voice becoming more hardened and desperate. “The only thing…you can do at this point is try.” He took in a rasping breath and fell to his knees next to me. “There is nothing…else. Nothing we can do…for her.”
Kheelan ground out a curse. I blinked my blurry eyes into focus for a moment as he reached into my pocket and pulled out the amber stone.
“Crysta,” he said, worry tinging his voice, “I need you to open up your core to me. Can you do that?”
“I…” I swallowed hard and tried again. “I don’t understand what you mean.”
He ran a hand over his eyes, looking ready to tear someone in two. It occurred to me for the first time that my illness might have been worse than he let on. Had he and my father been trying to protect me?
