by Ken Fite
Keller nodded and took on a more somber tone as he folded the paper, held onto one end, and tapped the other end into an open palm. His gaze dropped to the floor as he asked, “Any update on Agent Reynolds?”
Emma smiled. “He’s getting there.”
Keller shook his head and looked away. “When can I go visit him?”
“Give him another couple of days.”
Keller nodded and started to continue to the dining room when Ross called to him.
“Mr. President,” she said, and Keller turned around, “I left something for you at the table.”
Keller furrowed his brow again. “Thank you, Emma,” he said as she shot her boss a warm, gentle smile.
The president entered, pulled out a chair, and sat down. On the table, he found a thin package, crumpled and creased. He picked it up and started to inspect it when he heard two knocks at the door behind him.
“Your breakfast, sir,” said Chef Gregory, balancing a tray with one hand as he entered the room. The man slid the plate in front of the president and set down a steaming mug of black coffee. “Anything else, sir?”
Keller shook his head. “Not right now, Chef.”
“Then I will be back in a few minutes,” he said and showed himself to the door.
The president pushed the plate aside and placed the package in front of him. Fumbling for his glasses, he looked it over, ran his fingers across it, and found the postmark. “London,” he whispered to himself as he stared at the postmark for several seconds before he reached inside the already opened package that had been cut on one side. Keller grabbed hold of something thin inside and pulled it out of the package gently.
He pushed the package aside and carefully turned right-side up a copy of To Kill a Mockingbird. Looking up over his glasses at the empty chair across from him, he remembered a conversation from a week earlier. He stared at it and thought about the story he had told about Margaret, feeling himself start to get choked up.
Looking back down to the book, Keller opened the cover page and found an inscription written inside. “Making it count. —Blake and Jami,” it read. Keller smiled to himself and closed the book. He held onto it tight and stared at it for a long time as he thought about his late wife and Blake and the decision he had made.
There were two knocks at the door and Keller became present again. “Sir? Everything good?” asked Chef.
Keller remained still and, after a brief pause, finally spoke. “As good as it can be, Chef,” he answered softly.
HALF A WORLD away, I stood on the dark side of a window, two fingers lifting the blinds so I could look out onto a busy London street as Jami slept soundly on the bed next to me. I couldn’t stop thinking about that night in New York when I walked away from her. She had pleaded with me not to. Yelled it out to me, her voice cutting through the cold night air. But I had kept walking, never turned back, never told her the truth—that I loved her more than anything and that I was walking away from her to try to keep her safe.
I had told her that I felt empty. I had lost my wife and my father, the people in my life that I cared about the most, all because of my actions and my job. I loved Jami and thought the best way to keep her safe was to walk out of her life and leave her behind. I rejected her love because of a broken past that haunted me.
But I never could have kept her safe by keeping my distance. Instead, I made her pay for a mistake she had never made. I was the one that made the mistake all those months ago, choosing my job over the girl.
Jami stirred and I turned from the window to look at her. I walked to the edge of the bed and sat down next to her. She opened her eyes, smiled, and closed them as she nestled her head against the soft pillow.
I looked away and thought about past mistakes. How they’re meant to guide you, not define you. How every morning is a chance to start over, a chance to change and be somebody different if you choose to be.
What I finally had to learn was that I had to leave my past in the past so that it wouldn’t destroy my future. I could only live for what today had to offer and not for what yesterday had taken away from me. That the only way I could heal a broken past wasn’t by dwelling there, but by living fully in the present.
Jami stirred again. I looked down and saw the ring on her finger. I stared at it and thought again about second chances and how sometimes life gives you one because maybe the first time, you weren’t ready.
I closed my eyes and lowered my head as I thought long and hard about the old life that I had left behind.
I was finally ready.
Ready to let go of my past so that it would let go of me.
Ready to embrace life, understanding that today, I could decide who I was and what I believed in.
And I was ready to live life with an open heart, no matter where it would take us, so I could make it count.
Because you only live once. And the truth is, if you do it right, once is enough.
Find out what happens to Blake.
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-Ken
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The Blake Jordan Series
The Senator: Blake Jordan Book 1
Credible Threat: Blake Jordan Book 2
In Plain Sight: Blake Jordan Book 3
Rules of Engagement: Blake Jordan Book 4
