by Linda Verji
“I doubt it.” Carter shook his head. “And even if she was willing to listen, I don’t know if I want to talk to her right now. I can’t even look her in the face.”
“Give it some time,” Eve suggested. “Maybe she’ll listen to you then.”
He sighed but didn’t respond. After a long silence, he said, “We’ll need to get a new place. We can’t keep staying at this hotel, and there is no way I’m taking you and Jackson back to my mom’s place.”
The abrupt change in topic startled Eve because she wasn’t planning to bring this up tonight. But now that it was out there, she couldn’t ignore it. She moved away from Carter until they were facing each other on the bed but not touching. Then she said, “If you’re getting a new place, then it will have to be just for you and Jackson.”
Carter frowned. “Why?”
“I’m not going…. no, I can’t go with you.”
He looked even more confused. “Why not?”
Worrying her bottom lip with her teeth, Eve considered how to say what she wanted to say. Finally, she revealed, “My father is coming after your mother.”
Carter’s eyes immediately widened and shock chased confusion from his gaze. “He is?”
“He is,” Eve confirmed. “I gave him all the evidence I have on your mother and he says that it’s too much for him to ignore. He’ll spearhead an investigation into her. It could lead to her going to jail.”
Eve could’ve sworn that Carter stopped breathing right then. He was as still as a sculpture as he stared at her with consternation. Clearly, the thought of his mother actually going to jail hadn’t even crossed his mind.
Eve reached over to squeeze his upper arm. “I’m sorry, Carter. I would stop my dad but I think this is the right thing to do in this situation.”
“You don’t need to be sorry,” he murmured, but it was clear that he was still struggling with the idea of his mother being imprisoned. And Eve couldn’t blame him. Anyone in his shoes would be having the same reaction. Which was why she couldn’t go with him and Jackson.
“I’m the one who started it all. Because of me, your mother could be going to prison. To add on to that, it’s my dad who’ll be pushing for it,” Eve reminded him. “Can you honestly say that you want to live with the woman who sent your mother to prison?”
Carter opened his mouth to answer but no words emerged.
So Eve answered for him, “If you’d sent my mom or my dad to prison, I don’t think I would want to be with you. It would hurt too much. No matter what Sharon’s done, she’s still your mother, and I know how much you love her. If we live together, every morning you’ll be reminded of what I’ve done, and even if it was justified, you’ll still get hurt. Every single day.” As she spoke, she felt the tears crowd in her eyes and one slipped down her cheek. “I don’t want that for you, Carter. I’ve already hurt you enough. I don’t want to do it anymore.”
“You’re not…” He swallowed. “You’re not the one hurting me.”
“But I will be.” More tears fell as she said, “Carter, I know you. You’re the most loyal person I know and it’s one of the things that I love most about you. Even if you’re angry at your mother, I know you’ll want to support her. But how can you do that when I’m still hovering around you? You’ll feel too guilty. The best thing for you… no for both of us… is not to be around each other. We have to let go.”
He reached forward to wipe her cheek with his palm. “I don’t want to let you go.”
“I don’t want to let you go either.” She pulled in a shaky breath. “But we have to.”
“No, we don’t.” He dragged her closer to him. “We don’t have to let go.”
Eve melted into his body, but as she did, her sadness intensified because she knew that he was just in denial. The truth was that once he thought about it… once he really thought about it, he’d realize that she was right. He couldn’t be Sharon’s son and her husband at the same time. Eventually, he would have to choose one of them and it would hurt him too much. So she was making the choice for him.
Divorce was the only answer for them.
CHAPTER 23
Carter’s night was awful. Thoughts of his mother’s sins and thoughts of what Eve had said jostled for control over his mind and made falling asleep practically impossible. All night, he tossed and turned fitfully, grabbing five-minute naps here and there before his troubles screamed out for him to wake up. When the first rays of daylight peeked in through the gaps in the drapes, even those five-minute respites disappeared and he came fully awake.
Opening his sore, scratchy eyes, he stared broodingly up at the ceiling even as he held Eve close to him. She was lying half over him with her head on his chest and her leg wedged in between his. His arm tightened around her waist. In his heart, he wanted to hold on to her forever. He wanted to wake up each morning with her by his side just like this no matter how much he got hurt while being with her. However, logic reminded him that he wasn’t the only one who’d get hurt.
What about her?
How was she supposed to live with the son of the woman who’d hurt her so much? A stranger looking at this situation objectively would probably say that there was an easy solution to all this; Carter could just abandon his mother. But that wasn’t going to happen.
No matter what Sharon had done, he’d still stand by her. Whatever consequence she had to face, he’d face them with her because he’d also benefited from them. With her ill-gotten gains, Sharon had fed and raised him into the man he was now. No matter how much of a monster she was to other people, she’d done her best for him and loved him without reservation. Because of her, he was who he was. How could he abandon her?
In the same breath, he realized that it would be incredibly cruel to force Eve to sit by and watch silently while he stood by his mother? Sighing, he pressed his scratchy jaw into the braids at the top of Eve’s head. She was a victim, and his mother the perpetrator. It would hurt her too much to stay beside him. If letting go was what she wanted, then he would give it to her no matter how much it crushed him. Losing Eve was the price of being Sharon’s son.
As if the intensity of his thoughts had somehow been communicated to Eve, she stirred. Shifting around and rubbing her body against his, she slowly came awake. When her eyes opened, Carter tipped her chin up so their eyes could meet.
He forced a smile. “Good morning.”
“Morning.” She moved off him to stretch languorously. “What time is it?”
“Just a few minutes past six.”
“Ah!” With a sigh, she slowly sat up. “I need to wake Jackson up. He’s going to be late for school.”
Just as she was about to get off the bed, Carter caught her wrist to stop her. “Wait.”
“Hmm?” Her eyebrows went up.
Interlocking his fingers with hers, he asked, “What are you doing today?”
“You mean after I get Jackson ready school?” she asked. When he nodded, she said, “Work.”
“Is there any way you can take the day off?”
“You want me to take the day off?” Her forehead creased into a frown. “Why?”
He sat up then said, “I just want to spend the day together.”
Nervousness immediately filtered into Eve’s gaze and she swallowed fitfully before saying, “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I meant what I said last night, Carter. You and I should-”
“We should let go of each other,” he finished for her. “I heard you, and after thinking about it, I agree with you.” Ignoring how the pain reached up and vised around his heart, he continued calmly, “I won’t try to convince you to stay with me. You were right that staying together will only lead to more hurt.”
A myriad of emotions crossed her face – disappointment, sadness, acceptance. But all she said was, “I see.”
“But I’m not ready to let you go just yet.” Carter’s gaze lowered to their hands that were still connected. “I just want one day more with you, Eve. One day where we
can be a real husband and wife without any secrets between us. Just spend today with me and I promise I won’t ask for anything more. I’ll let you go.”
Eve was quiet for such an uncomfortably long time that he feared she would say no. But she quietly said, “I have an early morning meeting, but it should be over by around ten. We can do whatever you want after that.”
His heart jumped in excitement and he couldn’t keep from smiling as he met her eyes. “That will work for me.”
Carter hadn’t really thought about how he wanted to spend the day with her, but the hours between dropping Jackson at school and ten a.m. were enough to come up with something. At nine, he sent Eve a message telling her to meet him at the mall. He got to the mall at ten and sat in his car waiting for her. Fortunately, she didn’t keep him waiting for longing. Ten minutes after ten, her car zoomed into the lot. As she parked, he got out of his car to meet her.
“A movie?” Eve exclaimed as she got out of her car. “You want to see a movie?”
“Yeah, we haven’t seen a movie together in a long while.” Carter closed the car door for her. Setting his hand on the small of her back as they walked towards the mall, he added, “I miss the days when we used to skip class just so that we could catch the latest movies.”
“I never wanted to skip class.” Her eyes dancing with mirth, she said, “You forced me.”
“I forced you? Really?” Carter teased, “I remember you sending me text messages that only had posters of the movies.”
“That was me just informing you that the movie was out,” she claimed. “I never once asked you to take me.”
“Oh, so it’s now my fault that you skipped class?”
“Yes, it’s your fault.” She gave him a disapproving look and clucked several times. “You were a terrible, terrible influence.”
“But you liked it,” Carter reminded her with a waggle of his eyebrows.
Eve answered with a laugh. Seeing her laugh so easily and happily eased some of the pain that had lodged itself deep in his heart since he’d made the decision to let her go. In that moment, he decided to forget that they were leaving each other and just focus on enjoying his day with her. If this was to be their last day with each other, then he was going to suck every drop of pleasure that he could get from it.
His arm tightening around her waist, he led her into the mall and up to the theater.
When Eve saw what movie they were watching, she exclaimed, “No way! They’re still playing this?”
“It was just a one-off showing to celebrate its release thirteen years ago.”
“The Holiday.” Eve read the name plastered at the top of the poster. “Man, I loved this movie.”
“I remember.” Carter hid a smile. “You made me watch it with you twelve times.”
“It was ten times,” she corrected, “and I only made you watch it again because every time we watched it, you fell asleep.”
“I fell asleep because it is boring as hell.”
“Then why did you bring me to watch it again? Either you’re a masochist or lying.” She studied him for a moment before bursting into laughter. “I’m going to go with lying. You liked it, didn’t you?”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Yes, you did.” She poked the side of his body teasingly. “You were just pretending to sleep, weren’t you? Deep down you loved it. That’s why you came with me all those times. I’m right, aren’t I?”
“No, you’re not right. What you are is delusional.” The reason Carter had gone with her all those times was because he loved being with her then and now, even if it was while doing something he disliked. Perhaps he’d been half in love with her back then and didn’t even realize it. Grinning, he took her hand. “Come on. The movie is about to start.”
The movie was just as boring the thirteenth time watching it as it was the first time. It was overly sentimental, cloyingly sweet and thoroughly predictable. The numerous empty seats in the theater made it clear that Carter wasn’t the only one who found the movie boring. Yet, Carter stayed awake through it all. His eyes weren’t on the screen though. They were on her. His wife… soon to be ex-wife.
His gaze lingered on her face, taking in the fascinated light in her eyes as she followed the going-ons onscreen, reveling in the curl of her lips when she thought something was amusing. When she turned to him to whisper something about a particularly interesting scene, he couldn’t hold himself back. He cupped her cheek and leaned forward to fix his lips on hers in a fast kiss.
“Carter.” She pushed him away from her. Looking around the theater fretfully, she whispered, “We’re in public.”
“Sorry.” He sat back in his seat. “I just couldn’t help it.”
A few minutes later, he couldn’t help it again. He leaned closer and kissed her again. This time, she slapped his chest but the smile she gave him let him know that she didn’t hate that second kiss at all.
Two hours and fifteen minutes later, the movie ended.
“I knew you liked it,” Eve teased as they walked out of the theater. “That’s why you didn’t bother pretending to sleep today.”
“Trust me, it’s not the movie that kept me awake,” he said but didn’t elaborate.
However, Eve understood what he was saying. She looked away from his shyly. Chuckling, he slung his arm around her waist and brought her closer to him. He’d miss this part of her; the way she could go from being an unflappable warrior to a shy girl in the blink of an eye. Sadness swept in then, but he pushed it back.
Their next stop was the food-court. Carter had wanted to do something more fancy, but he knew Eve. She preferred the simple things in life. He was proved right when she lit up at the thought of ordering both Japanese and Lebanese food in the same meal.
Lunch was a happy affair. They talked about the food, the movie, their past… everything except what was really on their minds. There was no mention of Sharon, no discussion about how their world was falling apart, and certainly no reminders that this was likely the last date they’d ever have. They just reveled in each other’s presence, absorbing what joy they could.
Time flew faster than Carter would’ve liked. By the time they were done with lunch, it was three p.m.. He was about to suggest their next stop when Eve reminded him, “Jackson’s school is about to let out. I should go pick him up.”
Carter wasn’t ready to end their day just like that. He wanted to do more. Desperate to extend their time together, he suggested, “Why don’t we go pick him up then we can do something as a family? Maybe go to the batting cage or the arcade. He’ll love it.”
Eve thought over it for a moment then nodded. “Okay.”
“Let’s take you car,” he offered. “There’s no point in wasting gas.”
Actually, saving gas was the least of his worries. Driving in separate cars would lessen their time together. He wanted to spend as many minutes of his time with her as he could.
She frowned. “What about your car?”
“I can send someone to pick it up later,” he dismissed. Taking her hand, he led the way out of the mall. “Come on. We shouldn’t keep him waiting.”
They headed to her car and once they got there, Carter took the driver’s seat. If it was any other day, perhaps the drive to Jackson’s school would’ve been chattier, but the inevitability of their separation began to set in. Even though they were seated in the same car, Carter could feel them already pulling apart, slowly cutting themselves from each other.
He wanted to say something to ease the sense of loss that was starting to overwhelm him but he couldn’t think of anything to say. Even if he did have something to say, it would’ve been hard for words to slip past the lump that had now wedged itself firmly in his throat. It was obvious that Eve felt the looming loss too because she was just as silent as he was. Sadness poured from her in waves as she stared out the window.
Jackson’s school was situated in an area with large estates rather than high-rise buildings and thus there was no
traffic to slow them down. The world passed in a blur of colors and smooth tarmac as they silently zipped down the street. It was only when they neared an intersection and Carter needed to slow the car down that he realized that there was something wrong with the brakes.
Frowning and confused as hell, he stepped on the brake-pedal again. However, the car didn’t slow down. Trying again, he muttered, “What the hell?”
Eve turned to face him. “What’s the matter?”
“Not sure.” He pressed the brake-pedal down over and over again. The car didn’t stop. Gearing down didn’t work either.
And that’s when panic swooped in.
Before he knew it, the car was out of his control and hurtling towards the red-light. The next moments flew by in what was likely less than a minute yet somehow felt slowed down. He turned his wide-eyed gaze towards Eve and found her watching him with the same terror that was now coursing through his veins.
Eager to calm her, he started, “Eve, I-”
But he never got to finish his words because she suddenly screamed, “CARTER!”
Her eyes were not on him, they were on something beyond him. Carter turned but never got to see what terrified her so much. He just felt it.
Metal crashing into his side of the car as if a car had just slammed into them.
The car being pushed sideways by a great force and the screeching of wheels as it unsuccessfully tried to resist that pressure.
Intense, excruciating pain as the metal met the side of his body.
The crash of glass and metal mixed with the distinct crackles of his bones.
His body flung sideways then forwards as his face hit the airbag.
His nose breaking. Coppery blood pooling in his mouth and soaking his tongue.
The pain overwhelmed his body in a matter of seconds but as it did, all he could hear was Eve’s screams. He turned his head but only saw blurs of her, partly because his vision was now clouding and partly because the car was now spinning. He tried to stretch his hand out so he could touch her but for some reason, it felt like too much work.
