by Katie Fforde
Jago smiled, clearly pleased to have had the original idea.
‘After all,’ Helena went on, ‘although obviously they’d have to be up to standard, I wouldn’t have to love them. As long as I had, say, three … wall hangings perhaps?’
‘With “found objects” woven into them?’
‘If I was desperate,’ said Helena. ‘I have always insisted on things being functional.’
‘Wall hangings are functional if they’re hiding an unsightly wall,’ said Jago. He paused. ‘Are you going to finish your pudding?’
‘Not if I can avoid it. I feel a bit sick. Please …’ She pushed her bowl towards him. ‘Go for it!’
She gave a massive yawn as he put down his spoon. ‘Come on, let’s get you home,’ he said. ‘You’re dead on your feet.’
‘Dead in my chair,’ she corrected him but smiled. Even if they were just friends it was lovely to be with someone who looked out for her. ‘I’ll just go and pay the bill.’
She almost fell out of the pickup when they got home. ‘Do you mind if I leave things here in the back, or do you need it first thing?’
‘Don’t you worry about it. I’ll put it under cover in case it rains, but you get to bed.’
She set aside her concerns about keeping their relationship platonic and went to him with her arms open for a hug. He hugged her back, very hard, and it was lovely. ‘You’ve done so well today, Helly,’ he said. ‘I’m so proud of you!’
She didn’t quite know how to respond to this. ‘And I’m so grateful to you, you’ve been brilliant, feeding me, looking after me, making it possible to work ridiculous hours.’ A thought of how resentful her father had been of anything her mother did that didn’t involve him floated through her mind. ‘And now I’ve got to do it all again!’
‘But you will. You’ll do something amazing. Because you’re amazing. Now go in. I’ll bring you in a mug of hot chocolate and a hot-water bottle shortly.’
‘I can’t believe you’ve got a hot-water bottle,’ she said, utterly amazed at the thought.
‘I borrowed one from your mum when I dropped her off earlier. She was quite surprised when I asked but totally understood when I explained why. She gave me a hug.’
‘That is so sweet! Now I’ll have a quick shower and then bed.’
The hot-water bottle was in her bed and the mug of chocolate on the tea chest that was her bedside table by the time she was out of the shower. She realised that if she hadn’t fancied Jago at all she’d still want to marry him and bear his children. And she did fancy him. A lot.
Chapter Twenty-one
Helena was somewhat surprised to find a text from Cressida asking her over when she finally opened her eyes the following morning. She really needed to get on with her work but as she was still bonetired and wanted to ask Cressida for the blankets and throws given to her over the years, she decided to go.
She did take the time to attack her hair with straighteners before she went, though, having gone to bed with it wet. She didn’t want to arrive looking like one of those dogs who have dreadlocks.
She finished her breakfast and had a banana – there was no guarantee of biscuits, or indeed anything, at Cressida’s house. She planned to visit her mother on the way home. Knowing how many blankets she could come up with before she started would give her courage to jump into another killing work schedule.
Cressida was unusually friendly when she opened the door to Helena. ‘Helena! Come in! I’m so glad you had time to come round, but I just wanted to tell you how amazing the show was! I’ve never seen so many truly beautiful things in one place before. Come in! I’ve got the coffee on. Martin has taken Ismene to a museum – it’s their Sunday treat if we’re not doing anything else.’
Not only was there coffee, but there were gluten-, dairy-, sugar- and taste-free biscuits on offer. Helena was suspicious. Surely all this wasn’t because Cressida had liked the show? Although she knew she would like it – high-end, expensive and impeccable quality, it was perfect for Cressida’s aesthetic taste.
‘Well, this is very nice,’ she said, hearing her mother’s voice in hers.
Cressida gave a self-conscious little cough. ‘You’ve probably guessed, Helena, that I haven’t just asked you here to congratulate you on your show – which was fantastic.’
‘Yes?’
‘I’m a bit worried about Gilly.’
Guilt came over Helena like a fog. She had been so immersed in her work that she hadn’t been paying any real attention to her mother, beyond accepting meals and biscuits. ‘Why?’
Cressida pursed her lips and searched for words – unlike her, who usually knew exactly what she wanted to say and said it. ‘I don’t know if you’re aware, but Gilly’s been romantically involved with Leo.’
Helena nodded. She did know this – or rather – she had known it, but now she thought it was over.
‘I think Gilly senses you’re not entirely happy about it which is probably why she hasn’t confided in you.’ Cressida managed to imply that Gilly had confided in her, which Helena very much doubted.
‘Go on,’ said Helena, trying to appear dispassionate.
‘The thing is, I know it’s difficult when it’s your mother, but this could be her last chance of happiness. Leo is really lovely and has an amazing house. She’s not getting any younger and having seen that having a new life with a gorgeous man is possible, you mustn’t snatch the dream away from her.’
‘I would never do that.’ At least this was something that Helena could say with total sincerity.
‘Please tell her she has your blessing! She’s been behaving strangely lately. You’ve been so busy you may not have noticed.’
Guilt swamped her again. ‘I have been working all hours getting ready for this show.’
‘I know! And please don’t think I’m judging you, but we’re family and if you can’t look out for your mum then I will. And I have!’
‘I’m very grateful,’ muttered Helena, feeling anything but gratitude.
‘And I don’t know if you know this, but she said something about going gliding.’
‘Gliding!’
‘I know!’ said Cressida. ‘I was horrified too. Imagine Gilly doing anything like that! Even hearing her talking about it was worrying. To be honest, she’d be better off with a man to take care of her.’
Helena may have wanted to keep things between her and Cressida civilised but she could not swallow this. ‘That’s not very feminist of you! Besides, she’s looked after herself perfectly well up to now.’
‘You have to remember’, said Cressida, as if confiding a great secret, ‘that women’s bodies change. Hormones kick in and we can go crazy.’
Cressida said this in a way that made Helena absolutely confident that this would never happen to her sister-in-law. The way Cressida had said ‘crazy’ indicated a lack of control that was physiologically impossible for her. Her hormones were far too well disciplined.
Remembering she had a favour to ask meant Helena bit back any protest.
‘I’ll go and see her, but, Cressida, although I am so grateful you’ve been looking out for Mum for me, I do have another favour to ask you. It’s a bit of a funny one.’
‘Oh?’
To give herself confidence Helena imagined her sister-in-law doing a Tough Mudder – something that physically she’d be more than capable of, but would she be able to get covered in sludge to prove her fitness? Possibly not.
Helena cleared her throat. ‘This is a really odd request. You know I sold absolutely everything I had in the show yesterday?’
‘I didn’t know but that’s really good, isn’t it?’
‘Well, yes, but I’ve got another show coming up really soon and absolutely nothing to put in it. Mum suggested she gives me back all the blankets and throws and things I’ve ever given her, just so I’ve got something to display. I was wondering if you’d give me back the ones I’ve given you, too? I can put “sold” stickers on them if you’re reall
y fond of them, but otherwise I’ll replace them when I can.’
A strange look tweaked at Cressida’s features, an expression strangely like embarrassment, which was not an emotion that often touched her life. ‘I’m afraid I had a big Marie Kondo session, Helena, and I found they didn’t spark joy. They went to the charity shop.’
Helena caught her breath. ‘Was this recently? Is there any chance I could buy them back?’
Cressida shook her head. ‘It was when Marie’s book first came out, so no.’
Somehow Helena got herself to the door and out of it, muttering conventional thanks as she went. But inside she felt kicked in the stomach. And when she’d stopped feeling quite so offended she felt angry about the waste. From now on she resolved to only give Cressida and Martin boxes of chocolates (Milk Tray for preference) as presents. Nothing she’d put any effort into.
She’d calmed down a bit by the time she’d got to Fairacres and was determined to find out what was going on with her mother. She was still feeling terribly guilty for ignoring her – or at least only eating her food but not actually paying attention. Was Gilly really in love with Leo? And what was all this about going gliding? Her mother would never do that! But first and foremost, she had to tell her mother about Cressida’s despicable action.
Gilly heard Helena come in through the back door and came downstairs, a bundle of dirty linen in her arms. ‘Hi, darling, how are you? You did so brilliantly yesterday! I was so impressed!’
They went into the kitchen, and Gilly put on the kettle for coffee.
‘So what are you grumpy about?’ asked Gilly when Helena had pulled out a chair and sat down.
‘Cressida!’
Gilly felt slightly anxious. She hated it when her daughter was at odds with her daughter-in-law. She was also a bit worried about what Cressida might have said to Helena about Leo. ‘What?’
‘She Marie Kondoed all the woven things I’ve given her over the years! They didn’t “spark joy”.’
‘Oh, Helly! Don’t say she “regifted” them?’
This made Helena smile. ‘I know how much you hate that expression but what she did was worse!’
‘Is that even possible?’
‘Yes! She gave them all to charity and she did it ages ago so I can’t even buy them back. Don’t you think that’s rude?’
‘It is really horrible to have a present you’ve thought about, and in your case made, but I suppose if they didn’t fit in with her décor …’
‘I knew you’d stick up for her! And to be honest, if I didn’t need them I probably wouldn’t be so upset.’
‘Well, you’ve given me loads of lovely things over the years and I’ve still got them all, and most of them have escaped the moths. Although one or two blankets are …’ She paused, choosing her words. ‘Early work.’
‘Oh, that’s fine!’ said Helena. ‘Jago had a brilliant idea. I should cut up the “early” or moth-eaten work and weave wall hangings from them. They’d be quick to do. I told him I liked things to be functional but he said a wall hanging was functional if it was hiding something unsightly.’
‘I do like Jago,’ said Gilly. ‘He was so sweet to me yesterday – and asking to borrow a hot-water bottle! Adorable!’
‘He is really kind, and a great housemate. Although if my next show goes as well as this one did, I’ll be able to afford my own place.’
‘Aren’t you living together as a couple then? That’s lovely and old-fashioned of you.’
Helena looked discomforted. ‘Well, I want to pay my way. I don’t want to just latch on to Jago …’
There was definitely something odd going on. Gilly resolved to find out more.
‘Here’s your coffee,’ she said. ‘You must be so tired after the show.’
‘I am. Too tired to be creative really, so I’m taking the day off.’ Helena looked at her mother intently and Gilly realised she’d missed her moment. Helena was going to interrogate her and not the other way round. ‘Cressida said she was worried about you.’
‘Why? I promise there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I’ve never felt fitter.’ She paused. ‘I think I may have lost a bit of weight – although of course I never weigh myself.’
‘You look great, Mum. I don’t think it was your physical health she was worried about.’
‘That’s even worse! Has she caught me talking to myself? Surely everyone does that.’
Helena began to giggle. ‘No, nothing like that! And yes, everyone does talk to themselves – or at least I do. No, she said – and honestly I don’t believe this but although she has her faults I don’t think Cressida lies – she said you’d talked about going gliding.’
Gilly joined in the giggling, hoping it would disguise her blush. ‘What is Cressida like?’
‘I knew she was talking rubbish,’ Helena went on before Gilly had worked out what to say. ‘She’s more worried about you and Leo.’ Helena took a breath. ‘She’s worried that because I don’t like him you feel you can’t go out with him. She says he’s your last chance of happiness and I mustn’t blight the relationship.’
‘Cressida is talking out of the back of her neck,’ said Gilly firmly. ‘She’s convinced there’s something going on between me and Leo, but there isn’t.’
‘Oh. Well, that’s a relief! I would have done my absolute best to live with it if you and he really were in love, but I’m very glad I don’t have to.’
‘You don’t have to,’ said Gilly firmly.
‘But Cressida says Leo might be your last chance of happiness.’
Helena obviously needed more convincing. ‘Darling, if I feel lonely, I’ll just go on Kinder and find a new man. Or is Kinder what I read books on?’ Gilly was slightly worried that she may have overdone the dotty-old-lady act.
But as this sent Helena into further fits of giggles she knew it was all right. ‘Don’t worry, Mum, I’d never let you go on Tinder, you’d never know if you had to swipe left or right.’
But after Helena had gone Gilly found herself wondering how she’d feel if Helena didn’t like William. Would it be as easy for her to think she’d have to give him up because of her daughter? No, she decided, it wouldn’t be easy at all. And she might not even try.
Chapter Twenty-two
Gilly had been making beds, baking shortbread, picking posies and organising laundry for what seemed like every hour of every day since Helena’s show. And while she liked to be busy she was tired. Also, although she was physically occupied from dawn to well past dusk her brain was free to worry about William.
When she’d first met Leo she’d been a bit swept off her feet. He was so stylish and charming, had treated her like a queen, and taken her to lovely places. But when she started to get to know William better she’d realised how much nicer, kinder and, now she came to think about it, more attractive than Leo he was. William was the quiet horse that came up on the outside without being noticed until he was at the finish line. But was he still interested in winning this particular race? How would she ever find out?
If only he hadn’t seen her with Leo she could just invite him round for a meal or something. In fact, she was fairly sure, if he hadn’t seen her with Leo he would have been in touch himself. But she didn’t have the courage to email him and tell him she and Leo were not together when he may not have actually been looking at them at the show; he could have been looking at something quite different.
She wished she was braver. Gilly was sure Helena wouldn’t worry about things like that; she’d just email William and explain.
Thinking about Helena didn’t help her either. What was going on between her and Jago? He was such a lovely man, she would be so sad if there was something dreadfully wrong with him that made him ineligible in some way.
A thought occurred to her. Could he be gay? It wouldn’t be a thing that was wrong with him of course but it did make him unsuitable for Helena! It didn’t seem terribly likely, but Gilly didn’t trust her gaydar; was his sensitive caring of Hele
na something you could expect from a man who was heterosexual? Possibly not! Hot-water bottles were just a little bit camp, after all, however much everyone loved them.
But even if he wasn’t going to be the father of her grandchildren, Jago was still a lovely man and a very good friend to Helena. She found the thought of Helena having a gay best friend comforting.
She was still musing about Jago’s sexuality while she made yet another batch of shortbread, wondering at the same time if she had in fact got bored with making the same biscuit time after time, when the phone rang. Slightly hoping it wasn’t another booking – she could do with a few days off – she went to answer it.
‘Darling? Daphne here! How are you?’
‘I’m fine, Daphne. How lovely to hear from you, and how are you?’ Gilly wiped her hands on her apron.
‘In the pink, sweetie, absolutely in the pink. Now, I’ve got a plan.’
‘Sounds a bit worrying.’ Gilly really hoped that if the plan meant her B & B being taken over by a lot of unruly women, she would have time to prepare properly.
Daphne ignored Gilly’s wary response. ‘It’s William’s birthday soon.’
‘Oh?’
‘Yes, and you know something? He’s never had a party! Not ever, in all his life. So I thought I’d organise one.’
‘What took you so long? He must be in his fifties,’ said Gilly.
‘I just assumed his parents were in charge of that sort of thing but no. I have to do it now!’
‘OK, well, anything I can do to help…?’ She briefly wondered if she should offer to have the party in her house but then decided it would look pushy. If William didn’t fancy her it would be awful – for him and for her.
‘Well, you can come, and – if it wouldn’t be too much trouble – make a cake? I’m sure I could get someone else to make one but I thought you’d make a much nicer one.’
