by Eric Vall
Then I shifted the image to see there were three more tunnels that led deep into the jungles of Nalnora, and one of them ended dangerously close to where House Orrel kept their army of Wendigos.
“Fuck,” I breathed, and my eyes shot open.
Chapter 2
The snatcher automaton was already bringing in another batch of mages by the time Shoshanne finished her work, and I helped her transfer the others to the upper levels of the infirmary since everyone in town was still passed out from the celebration. Her Terra Mage assistants would probably be out for several more hours, and I really wished I could give Shoshanne a day off, but she didn’t seem to mind the work.
I got the sense her pride as a healer was a little ruffled after this morning, so I just did as I was told and reorganized the patients for her while she sterilized her tools and muttered under her breath about making broth and brewing a new batch of tranquilizer. I didn’t fill her in on the developments with the Master’s fortress, either, since she seemed to have enough things to worry about, and I knew she’d just end up with her brows crinkled with worry all afternoon. Besides, news this bad was usually something I preferred to tell my women all at once, and hopefully the knot in my stomach would have eased by then.
Once Raynor arrived to give the healer a hand, I was finally certain everything in the infirmary was handled, so I decided to head back to the house. Shoshanne asked me to send the other women over once they woke up so she could help them recover from the Rosh, and I left her with a dozen more runes to remove as Raynor began preparing the next batch of tranquilizer.
I could hear a few tired sighs coming from my women already as I crossed the clearing, and when I entered the atrium, I couldn’t help grinning at the sight that greeted me.
Deya, Aurora, and Cayla were all lounging in the enchanted waters of the fountain, and they looked like they had no intention of leaving anytime soon. Their slender legs were draped across each other’s laps while they lazily scooped water across their arms and breasts, and all three turned sleepy smiles my way that made my heart flutter a bit.
Even with bags under their eyes, they looked like a group of Grecian goddesses bathing amidst my hoard of weaponry, and I admired every dripping curve as I strolled over to crouch beside them.
Then Aurora slid over to steal a kiss, and her emerald eyes practically sparkled when they met mine.
“Ladies,” I murmured with a smirk. “I assumed you’d be sleeping all day after the treatment I gave you last night.”
“I want to,” Deya pouted. “My head is trying to explode.”
“My legs won’t move,” Cayla mumbled as she dropped her head back against the fountain edge.
“I’m not surprised,” I chuckled. “You were pretty demanding. I don’t think we’ve ever tried half those positions before.”
“That sounds about right,” the princess giggled. “How did we get back to the house?”
I stared for a second. “I walked you. Don’t you remember?”
All three women shook their heads without concern, and I slowly stood as I glanced around the atrium. There was a half-eaten platter of bread and fruits on the ground, but nothing else, and as I considered how much Rosh they’d drank, a notion hit me in the gut like a freight train.
“Out of curiosity,” I muttered, “what do you guys remember?”
The three women furrowed their brows in unison.
“Hmm,” Aurora mused and squinted her eyes as she tried to recall the night before. “I feel like the Baroness’ nipples were mentioned, and Kurna taught me to do something amazing that I already forgot how to do.”
“Something about dragon fleets?” Deya guessed.
“What do the words ‘baby palace’ have to do with anything?” Cayla asked as she stared at the ceiling. “That’s all I’ve got.”
My brows shot up. “Oh, shit.”
“What?” Aurora asked, and she sat up uneasily. “What did we do? It was embarrassing, wasn’t it? Did I kill someone? I’m so sorry if I did, that Rosh went straight to my head.”
“Mason wouldn’t let you kill someone,” Cayla sighed. “You probably just made him tie you down as usual.”
I’d forgotten how to blink by now, so I just nodded along and tried to come up with something to say. Apparently, none of my women remembered any of their plotting about our murdery children, and the hours they spent begging for me to cum in them again and again to get them pregnant flashed through my mind as my legs went numb.
“Uh … ” I looked around again to see if there were any empty cups lying around, but I didn’t see any. “So, did you guys drink or not drink the tea today?”
All three women sobered immediately.
“What tea?” Cayla asked as her icy blue eyes zeroed in on me.
“You know,” I chuckled, “the tea. Dallium, right?”
“Mason!” Aurora gasped, and she splashed water at me as her cheeks turned red. “Why are you talking about our tea? Mind your own business!”
“It’s personal!” Cayla informed me as she shifted uncomfortably, and my jaw dropped.
“What? You’re the ones who brought it up last night!”
“So?” Aurora scoffed. “We were drunk, stop talking about it!”
“Yeah, but,” I tried as I rifled my hair, “I thought you said … I mean, you made it pretty clear last night that you all wanted … ”
I bit my lip as I considered the three women, and Deya was deliberately averting her gaze while the other two looked thoroughly affronted.
“Alright, never mind,” I sighed.
“No, wait,” Cayla suddenly said, and she narrowed her eyes. “What did we say about the tea?”
I swallowed hard and fidgeted a bit. “You seriously don’t remember?”
The women shook their heads.
“Uh …” I cleared my throat. “Just stuff. You know. That you drink it twice a day and that’s why none of you have gotten pregnant yet.”
Aurora and Cayla exchanged a pointed look.
“Okay,” the half-elf eventually muttered. “So, why do you care?”
“What?”
“Why do you care if we drank our tea?” Cayla asked. “Do you not want us to?”
I couldn’t really feel my face anymore, but it probably looked like I was three seconds from getting mowed down by a car as my mind refused to offer up any coherent statements. It was just a hollow skull now, but I finally blinked after a full minute.
“I didn’t say that,” I managed. “I didn’t not say that. I just … well … ”
“You said we haven’t gotten pregnant yet,” Aurora pointed out as she furrowed her brows skeptically.
My legs started shuffling me away, and I rubbed nervously at the back of my neck as Deya’s violet eyes widened.
“Did I? I uh … you know, I’ve got a lot to …” I tried, and my back hit the wooden planks of the door. “The Oculus! I’ve gotta check on that and handle a couple things, so you guys just do your thing. Shoshanne said she can do the healing stuff, and uh … I’ll just be right back. Cool? Cool.”
My ankles knotted around themselves from how fast I turned tail, but I tripped my way out of the house and firmly shut the door behind me before any of them could get beyond their confused stares.
Then I heard Deya let out a silvery giggle. “He definitely said ‘yet.’”
“Where the fuck is Haragh?” I growled as I clutched my hair right to the roots, and I nearly bolted down the lane.
Getting through Falmount was like playing lava as a kid, though, and I hopped precariously over bodies as I scanned everywhere for the half-ogre. It looked like a massacre had taken place, but the mugs strewn all over the lanes and still clutched in the mages’ fists eased my concerns. Clearly, they were alive, and most of them were at least half dressed while they drooled on their companions and laid propped against trees, houses, and each other. A few were belly up in the street and hugging their empty mugs like teddy bears, and I caught sight of one y
oung man draped over his windowsill and snoring into the bushes.
The mess from the celebration last night only got worse as I neared the marketplace, and I finally came to a stop as I stared. Almost every mage strewn around the clearing between the oak trees were completely naked, and the six barrels of Rosh were completely gone. Some of the empty barrels had mages inside of them now, while others were tipped sideways and used as backrests. Then I saw the guy who’d been swimming through his own sinkhole, and it looked like he’d fallen asleep halfway in the ground with two others.
There were only a handful of mages awake now, and they’d clearly chosen ale over Rosh last night because they picked their way through the naked limbs without concern as they headed for the library.
“Okay,” I mumbled to myself. “I feel like this isn’t my mess to clean up.”
So, I hopped over legs and arms to make my way across the market, and when I got to the other side, I found Kurna.
His mage’s robe was only a tattered loincloth now, and he had a black eye and a bloody nose as he laid starfish style outside the training fields. There was a woman’s silky purple garter tied around his forehead like a bandana, and little amber flames flickered from his fingertips despite his gravelly snores.
I crouched and snuffed them out as I shook my head, and I wished this realm had cell phones with cameras because there was no way my women would believe me about the state of the brawny Ignis Mage. I was still chuckling to myself when I left the mess of Falmount behind me and rounded the wall of the training fields, and as I headed north into the foothills, I sparked my Terra Magic to scan for any sign of Haragh.
I knew he’d moved to the northern woods with Taru after we returned from Jagruel, but I was tentative to show up at their new place unannounced because hearing ogres fucking wasn’t anything I wanted to experience in my life.
So, I moved at a slow and cringy pace as I worked my way through the woods, but then I heard a cheery tune being whistled up ahead, and as I redirected my Terra powers, I could sense the familiar footfalls of my half-ogre friend.
“Oh, thank the gods,” I sighed, and I leapt over felled logs as I sprinted onward.
Haragh cocked a brow when he saw me coming, and I couldn’t help but notice he was more beat to hell than he’d been the last time I saw him. Even the buttons on his leather vest were torn clean off, but I didn’t bother pointing this out as I came to a gasping stop in front of him.
“You alright?” the half-ogre chuckled. “Look like ye’ve seen a ghost.”
“I’m so glad you’re not passed out.”
“’Course I’m not,” he snorted. “Ogres know how to hold their Rosh, unlike you lot. Did those women of yours ever make it home in one piece? Urn told me they were startin’ quite a bit of trouble.”
I nodded and glanced nervously over my shoulder. “You are exactly the person I need to talk to. What are you doing right now?”
“Nothin’” he said with a shrug. “Thought I’d go see if Kurna was alive is all. He was fixin’ to jump off the pub roof at one point.”
“He’s alive,” I chuckled.
“Oh, good,” Haragh said lightly. “What are you panickin’ about then?”
“Dude … I don’t even know where to begin,” I replied, and I tried to decide if my elven women could hear me this far away. Then I lowered my voice. “Look, come with me to Serin. I’ve gotta check on the repairs to the Oculus. I’ll tell you along the way.”
Haragh eyed me with some concern as I power walked back through the woods, and we took a route around the outskirts of the village to avoid the maze of mages littering the streets. When we got to the Mustang, I motioned for Haragh to get in as quickly as possible, and I glanced around to see if my women were outside.
I could hear them giggling and murmuring quietly to each other in the infirmary, and I abruptly jumped into the car.
Bobbie roared to life as I planted my foot through the accelerator, and Haragh grabbed ahold of the ceiling as we sped toward Serin. Once we skidded onto the dirt road that led to the capital, I finally took a deep breath.
“Haragh, I think I might be having four babies,” I told him.
“What?” he snorted.
“Last night, the women went crazy after all that Rosh, and they begged me to get them pregnant.”
“All four of them?” he asked anxiously.
“Yep,” I said with a harried nod, “aaaand that’s not even the worst of it, because none of them remember a damn thing.”
“They don’t remember wanting you to get them pregnant?”
“Nope. I asked them if they were gonna drink the tea, and they had no fucking idea what I was talking about.”
“What tea?”
“The tea!” I snapped as I kneaded the steering wheel in my grip. “They said they drink this weird tea every day so they don’t get pregnant, and that they weren’t going to drink it anymore because they want all these babies. Now, I have no idea if they drank it or not.”
“Well,” Haragh said, and I noticed he looked a little paler green, “that’s good then. If they don’t remember, they’ll drink it.”
“Maybe,” I allowed, “except I asked them about it, because duh, and they asked me why I cared. They have no idea the kind of stuff they were saying last night, or the kind of stuff I did to them, and now they’re asking me if I don’t want them to drink the tea anymore.”
“What’d you say?” he demanded, and I sent him a nervous glance.
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “I panicked.”
“Shit,” the half-ogre mumbled.
“I know!” I groaned. “I couldn’t even put words together. I said something, and they were looking at me. Then I bolted, and they’re giggling, and I’m so confused. Four babies! Do you know how many that is? That’s … ”
“Four.”
“Yeah!” I scoffed. “And last night Cayla was going on about me making them mini guns and, dude … I can’t be arming toddlers. There’s so many reasons that’s not happening.”
“Well, you’ve gotta kill that Master before they show up,” Haragh informed me. “You can’t have an arch nemesis with kids running around. That’s not fittin’.”
“Exactly,” I agreed as I slammed my hand on the steering wheel. Then I furrowed my brow. “So, wait a minute. Are you saying this is all fine technically? Because I can just kill the Master off before the babies get here, right? No mini guns needed.”
“S’pose ye’ have to,” he snorted.
“Unless they drink the tea today,” I mused, and Haragh scratched at his chin for a bit in thought.
“Why don’t you just bring it up again?”
“I don’t know, they got all touchy about it,” I sighed. “Like it was rude to bring up the tea.”
“Well, yeah, that’s not too polite,” he agreed. “Women got all kinds of herbs and spices and shit. It’s personal.”
“They brought it up first!”
“Why didn’t you squash it when they brought it up?” the half-ogre challenged as he threw his big green arms up. “Tell ‘em hell no! You’ve got shit to take care of! No babies!”
“Because,” I groaned, “you have no idea how hard it is to resist the four of them like that. They were already naked and going on and on about it. They begged me for it. Repeatedly!”
“Damn.”
“Our babies were practically spilling out of their eyeballs,” I told him through gritted teeth. “In every color combination, too. What was I supposed to do? Have you seen my women? They’re fucking gorgeous! How could I not want to have babies with them? And why shouldn’t I when they want it so damn bad?”
“Aww,” Haragh chuckled. “You’ve got a point with that blue hair in the mix, plus the elf with the pink hair. Ye’ gotta wonder if they’d have your metal powers. Ah, and if you had a wee babe with Miss Cayla, I bet the tyke would be a hell of a shot. And with Shoshanne, the kid would likely be smart as all--”
“Not helping,” I m
uttered.
“Sorry.”
“They’ll be little murderers, I just know it,” I mumbled, and as I shifted anxiously in my seat, I realized I was driving way faster than usual.
“Your elf’s a docile little thing, though,” the half-ogre pointed out.
“No, she’s a troublemaker is what she is,” I snorted, “but what if our baby turns out like her brother? My kid, but related to that guy … ”
“Woah.” Haragh’s eyes widened. “That would be a bit scary. Still, this could be simple. Ye’ just keep an eye out, yeah? See if they’re sippin’ any tea. Wake up early, set yourself up in the kitchen, and follow them around.”
“I can’t stalk my own women,” I sighed. “That’s just not okay.”
“With those runes ye’ don’t really have to,” he said with a shrug. “Give it a listen instead. See if ye’ hear any tea.”
“Right, the silence of tea steeping in a cup.”
Haragh furrowed his brows. “I see your point.”
“You know what? It doesn’t matter,” I decided. “Right? They’ll do their thing, and either they’ll be pregnant, or they won’t be. I’m cool with it.”
Even as the words left my mouth, I knew I couldn’t maintain that chill of an attitude about this, and when I snuck a glance at Haragh, I found him looking at me.
He was clearly just as unconvinced as I was.
“Shit,” I cursed.
“That fuckin’ Rosh, man,” Haragh chuckled.
“Fucking Rosh. How are the ogres not constantly pregnant?”
“Most of ‘em are,” he admitted. “Taru certainly wants a big family, and I couldn’t deny the woman a damn thing she wants, I’ll tell ye’ that much.”
“Wait, you’re planning on being a dad?” I asked, and the news brought out a lopsided grin in me. “How are you so calm about this?”
Haragh snorted. “Well, the Master don’t give a shit about me, does he? I’ll be just fine either way.”
“Godsdamnit,” I growled, and I nodded a greeting to Simun as we pulled up to the gates of Serin.
“Baron Flynt,” the guard said with a deep bow.
