“You both have that same glow about you. It is the thread that connects you. Now, rest.”
**
When she opened her eyes, Ren was surprised to see nothing in the dark of the room. Her whole body ached so much that she expected it to emit a glow that might light up the room. It was a disappointment that it didn't, she could use a distraction from the pain itself.
Against her better judgment - and Mariel's insistence - Ren slowly worked her way out of bed and onto her feet. Her legs shook beneath her, as if they were no longer accustomed to the weight they needed to support. She grit her teeth and tried not to growl as she forced herself to adapt and press on.
You did it once before, you can do this again.
Small steps led her from the side of the bed to the door. Her steps grew bolder as she found walls to help support her. Ren moved from her room to the hall and before she even considered where she was going, she was already standing outside Joe's door.
The moment she realized, her legs stopped shaking. She swayed back and forth gently, threatening to tip forward and push into the room at any moment. Ren closed her eyes and put a palm on the door. Behind her eyelids she could almost see the pale glow: it was like a ribbon of mist moving through the door into the room. She could bet that where it stopped was the same place Joe was sleeping right now.
And then the trembling started. Not in her legs, but in her fingers. Suddenly, doubt was at the forefront of her mind. A thousand creeping questions whispered all at once made her shut her eyes tight and take a step back from the door.
What if Mariel's wrong? What if Joe blames you for all of this? What if she doesn't love you back?
The fear was a sucker punch she couldn't have anticipated. She took another step away, her fingers slipping from the wood of the door to fall listlessly at her side. Was it worth trying only to fail? Could she actually say those words, only to have them fall on deaf ears?
The pain crept back into her body and she felt frail, weak, and alone all at once. Gravity threatened to drag her to the floor, but a sudden noise put everything on hold. The mechanism in the door caught as the knob began to turn. Ren could only stare - part of her wanted to run; the rest of her was paralyzed with fear for any action she might take now.
The door swung slowly of its own volition. In the deeper darkness, Joe stood, leaning against the doorjamb. Her eyes were obscured by unruly bedhead, but Ren found it almost comforting. She couldn't see the emotion in Joe's eyes.
"I didn't mean to wake you." Ren heard her own voice and was surprised how weak it sounded.
"I wasn't sleeping - not much. The pain keeps me up." Ren felt herself nodding as Joe continued. "I heard you out here. I thought you were coming in."
"I -" She started, but the rest caught in her throat. Ren wasn't sure she could go through with it. The doubts were still lingering in the hall with her. "I think I'm beyond exhausted. I'm -"
"No."
It was one word, but it was self-assured. It cut her off mid-thought, and silenced the doubts around her.
"What?"
Joe stepped into the hall, still clinging to the doorframe. "I said no. You don’t get to stand outside my door and hesitate. Not after all the hell we've come through. Not when I am standing right here in front of you."
The blood rushed to Ren's face. She shut her eyes. She wanted to speak, but even with the doubt cast aside, she was overwhelmed. She took a deep breath, her hand coming to her mouth.
"I wasn't all there the night you saved me - the first time - but I heard you." Ren's eyes opened as Joe took her hand, placing it over her heart. "You already have my heart, Ren. You don't need to ask."
The tears pushed forth: happy tears crowding out fearful tears as they all fell together. Ren's fingers fumbled, finally grasping enough of Joe to pull her in tight. They folded into an embrace of limbs. Ren pressed her lips to Joe's cheek; sobbing as she let go of all the pain and fear she'd felt for Joe and let the relief and delight crowd in.
"I love you, I love you, I love you," Ren forced the words through the heavy emotions. "I was so scared. Scared that you'd die before I could tell you, and scared that you wouldn't say it back, and-"
Joe put a finger to Ren's lips. Her cheeks shimmered with tears, but her smile shone brighter.
"Shh. I love you, Ren. Of course I do."
Ren was flush with a tide of emotions; feeling like Joe might be the only thing keeping her from collapsing now. "I'm sorry I didn't say it sooner. I'm sorry th-"
Joe hushed her again.
"Shut your stupid face and kiss me."
EIGHTEEN
A month passed and though Ren and Joe had both recovered from most of their injuries, they still took turns waking up in cold sweats in the middle of the night, screaming and fighting the shadows. Mariel and Colette spoke casually of selling the other houses and bringing everyone back under one roof. Ren wasn’t sure if that would be good or bad. There were eight other sisters she didn’t know and, while she could trust Joe’s judgment on some of them, there was no telling how she would get along with all of them. She also had no idea if that would work for or against them as far as Eunice was concerned. She was still out there, and she would come after them again. Was a dozen bustling supernaturals under one roof a benefit or a liability? She tried to steer the conversations back to house shuffles, where members would move to different houses periodically, but Mariel seemed distracted. Some days she was all-in and ready to move forward with a new strategy, other days, she looked like there was trouble brewing already. Both Joe and Ren mentioned it, but Mariel brushed concerns aside, expressing her own concern about their progress back to full health.
Time and a regular work schedule brought most things back to an even keel. Maintaining the showrooms had become something Ren actually looked forward to. She understood now that the routine was what kept them sane through the passing years. It gave them something to depend on, no matter how crazy things got. She was learning to appreciate that, and she was going to hold onto it. As tightly as necessary.
She had just finished another day in the ordinary world, noting to herself how almost normal her body felt again. It was close to being fully healed. She might even be able to race up a flight of stairs again without shooting pains in her ribs, but she wasn’t going to push it just yet.
She was approaching the front entrance, ready to begin locking up for the day when it burst open. A hooded figure stepped into the room and for a moment, Ren had the keen inspiration to grab the nearest heavy object and bludgeon it, just for old time’s sake. Before she could actually do that though, she had to grab the nearest structural support and hold on as the room closed in around her. She shut her eyes tight and took a deep breath, fighting the anxiety back down.
“Are you okay?” The voice was young and soft. It tugged at her, pulling her away from the darkness.
“I’ll be fine. You startled me, that’s all.”
“I’m sorry. I was hoping to get here before you closed for the evening.”
She took another deep breath, opening her eyes. “I’m just closing up for the night, actually. But if you’d like to come back tomorrow…”
“I’d prefer not, honestly. It’s been hard enough to find my way here.”
Ren’s skin prickled and she felt her muscles tense. It was possible she was being paranoid, but she’d rather be ready than caught off guard. She looked closer at the girl. Her hood was still up, which did nothing to ease frayed nerves. Her hands were tucked deep into the pockets of a grey pea coat. She wore a skirt with leggings under it, and leather boots. If she was a danger, she was an exceptionally fashionable one.
“I’ve been looking for someone, and the trail went cold here.” She pulled her hands from her pockets, reaching up and pushing back the hood. Ren’s muscles were taut, and she was ready to defend herself, but as the hood fell away, she found herself completely disarmed by what her eyes beheld.
The girl appeared to be very nervous, tryin
g to gauge Ren’s reaction as she stood there. The stare down - a silent contest that neither of them had consciously entered - had never officially begun between them, so neither knew how to end it, adding an enormous weight to the room.
“I would appreciate it very much if you said something right now. Anything, in fact.”
Ren couldn’t stop staring. The room skewed slightly as Ren tried to will the blood back into her brain. This girl had all the same features, right down to the furry skin, as Tau. Her ears were mostly obscured, but Ren could see the points sticking out, parting her hair on the sides. Her eyes were softer than his, a lush green-blue. But she was definitely his sister.
She began to look sheepish, as if she might have picked the wrong person to reveal herself to. She threaded her fingers, fidgeting nervously. Ren swallowed, her throat had gone dry, but she managed to choke out a single word.
“Panya?”
Her ears perked and her large eyes widened as she bounced.
“You’ve met Tau! Oh please, tell me where I can find him! I’ve been so worried!”
**
Ren and Joe took turns staring at Panya from across the coffee table. The family resemblance was uncanny, though they agreed that the characteristics lent themselves better to women than they did men. Her bangs were pointed, mimicking the natural angle of her brow. The rest of her hair was in a bob. The whole thing was dyed a deep shade of burgundy, which played well off her pale complexion. She wore the dark eyeliner of rebellious teens the world around, which did her no favors as her mascara spread woefully as she teared up.
Ren sat her down and brought her a cup of tea before telling her most of the story about Tau. Joe joined in unintentionally, hearing the cries and coming to see the commotion. She sat in and joined them for the rest of the conversation.
They decided not to tell her what they actually knew about Tau. That he had been a thief, a liar, and that he had met his end at the hand of the same dark forces he tried to control. Instead, they filled in a glorified version of the Tau they had known: that he had been threatened to assist some very bad people, or they would hurt his sister. They did tell her that he met his end in the warehouse, where they believed Panya was being held.
For her part, she had never known where Tau had gone off to, only that he had been gone for more than a year and she feared the worst. It was easy to follow rumors of a strange looking man as he wandered the continent, but when they ended here, she didn’t know what that meant.
Ren and Joe struggled to find other things to tell her. In the short time they had known Tau, he hadn’t offered a lot of personal information. Instead, they let her fill in the gaps, giving her a chance to talk about herself, her family, Tau, and in turn, they told her about their own family. They talked late into the night, introducing Colette when she finally came out to say good night. Mariel had declined to introduce herself, but she would be around in the morning.
They gave her some pillows and a quilted blanket, leaving her to the couch. They agreed as a group that she could figure out her next move after she got a good night’s sleep.
**
Ren woke with a jolt; sweat prickling her forehead and her heart racing in her chest. In her dreams, she saw those awful creatures again, all muscle and horror. She wondered if any of them were still alive out there and how many of them there might be.
She didn’t have much time to think about it. A shrill voice ripped through the silence, a cry from downstairs. Instinct pulled Ren out of bed and into action. She darted out the door and charged down the stairs. There was another cry from the couch as Ren rushed forward in the darkness.
“It’s alright, it’s just me - Ren.” She slowed as she saw Panya scrambling away from her. They were both panting, out of breath for their own reasons. “I heard a scream. You alright?”
“Yes. Well, no.” She took a breath. “It was a nightmare. I’ve been having them since Tau disappeared. It’s childish, I know.” Ren sat down beside her.
“No, there’s nothing childish about it. I’ve had them a lot lately, since Tau…” Panya looked up a Ren, her eyes glittering with tears in the darkness. “Sometimes, bad things happen, and we don’t know how to cope, so we have nightmares.”
She nodded, the tears coming harder, and leaned into Ren, wrapping her arms around Ren’s waist and sobbing into her lap. Ren cradled the young girl. She wanted so much to comfort Panya, but Ren was caught between two Taus - the one she fought and the one Panya mourned.
“I miss him so much. I just don’t know what I am going to do without him.”
“You’re going to live. You’ll find a way, I promise.”
Panya squeezed Ren tighter, sniffling, the tears subsiding and her breathing balancing itself.
“At least I know he didn’t die afraid and alone. Thank you for being there with him.”
Ren sat in the darkness, caressing the broken girl to sleep as the guilt prodded at her, tugging at her conscience. She waited for Panya’s breath to steady and deepen, signifying her steady drift into sleep. There was a moment, when that was exactly how she wished it would have happened. She understood that people make bad decisions sometimes, especially when they have good intentions. She forced herself to believe that’s exactly what it was: the best of intentions. She tried to push the rest of her memories aside and just live with the one that his sister believed.
A WORD FROM THE AUTHOR
If you enjoyed this book (or any book for that matter) please review it on all of your favorite merchant and social networking sites. Reviews are an author's livelihood. They bring us new readers and they encourage us to do what we love: keep writing. Please review.
If you would like to keep up with me, visit:
http://www.happierthoughts.com
Poke around the site, and definitely sign up for the mailing list. Those are the very best ways to keep up with everything going on in my head.
Most importantly though: thank you for being a reader.
- Andy
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Bailey Soper threatened me with death and dismemberment (in no particular order) to ensure the triumphant launch of this adventure. I cherish her dedication as an editor, a fan, and a friend. These things I do could not be accomplished without her.
Brian Ritson went beyond the call with this cover, plucking the idea directly from my head and putting it into visual medium with skills akin to sorcery. He is a wonderful and talented artist and I am lucky to call him my friend.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Andy Lockwood is a filmmaker and writer. When not making art, he spends his time buying books he does not have time to read. He has three cats and considers himself a proud uncle to all of feline kind. He currently lives in mid-Michigan.
This is his second published novel.
This is also his first series.
The Delaneys will return.
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