by S. E. Smith
“I’m… afraid,” she finally choked out in a husky voice. “I’m afraid if I let them out, I’ll never be able to capture them and put them back in the box. I’m not sure if I’m strong enough to survive it if I can’t.”
“I am strong enough,” Jaguin assured her, leaning closer.
A single tear escaped to slide down Sara’s cheek. The moment it struck his finger, he felt her let go of her nightmares. He drew in a deep breath as the suffocating fear returned a hundredfold. This time, the images weren’t cast in the shadows, but in vivid, striking detail. The sight, sounds, and smells of the prison that Sara and Emma were held in struck him with a savage blow. The painful memories would have sent him reeling if not for his determination to pull them away from Sara.
Agonizing pain ripped through him when he saw the brutality of Cuello and his men. It was not just the physical blows, but the mental ones that left scars no healer could see. He lived through Sara’s abduction and the brutal murder of her friend and co-worker. The dark cloth over her head not only blinded her, but made it difficult to breathe. She fought to draw in each breath, afraid it would be her last. Her arms were savagely twisted behind her and bound while the laughter of the men echoed in the vehicle they placed her in.
“Oh, my elila, my precious mate,” Jaguin groaned when he felt the first slash of the whip against her flesh.
Rage and sorrow fought with each other, threatening to drown him. Inside, he felt the strength of his mate – and her will to live. It was what made her who she was and his respect for her grew. Images from her childhood blended into her time in captivity. She thought of her aching loneliness after Delilah died, as well as, running through the forest near her home to escape the taunts of her cousins. She also remembered, the peace she found in the plants she discovered and the small garden that she grew deep within the woods.
He sorted through them, capturing the good memories and focusing on those so that they blossomed inside her and grew. He could never erase what she went through, but he could be there when they came and soothe her battered soul.
He moved his hand that was pressed against her cheek to thread his fingers through her hair. Her eyes were wide, haunted. Deep in their depths, he saw the frightened little girl and the brave, beautiful woman begging for help to protect her from the ravaging pain.
Hopelessness threatened to drown them, but he pushed through choking memories. Instead, he surrounded her with warmth, love, and hope. His dragon rose up inside him, connecting with him and his symbiot, making them one as they battled the dark shadows of Sara’s memories. His dragon roared, snapping and breathing fire at the inky shadows greedily reaching for her. His symbiot surged forward, wrapping Sara in golden armor that lit her mind with the memories of the beauty of her world. Through it all, Jaguin held her close to his body, his heart beating as one with hers, his mind and soul joined in a way that usually only happened after the Dragon Fire.
He scooped her into his arms when her knees gave out, cradling her and murmuring a soothing lullaby from his childhood. The deep chords encased her in the rhythm.
In the valley the warrior stood
As the battle drew close to home
The warrior’s shout, mixed with blood
The Great War had begun
Warriors fought and won the fight
But not all would live to go home
In the valley the warrior lay
A blade thrust through his heart
His dragon roared and his symbiot shimmered
As his life blood soaked into the soil
The goddess heard his true mate’s cry
And healed the thread that was severed
In the valley the warrior stood
His true mate by his side
Forever more they would be together
A warrior and his mate watch frozen
As they stand guard and protect
Lest we forget the cost of war
Jaguin sank down on the long sofa, holding Sara tightly to him as he sang. Slowly, the battle with the dark memories that held her captive grew fainter. He continued to sing the chords that were written by a grieving mate from his village shortly after the Great War began. He knew the warrior that died that day. It was his cousin and close friend. His grieving mate knelt beside him, holding him and begging for the Goddess to heal the wound through her mate’s heart.
Like the song, the Goddess joined them together forever. Both his cousin and his cousin’s true mate died that day. The people erected a statue in the meadow where the battle took place, not far from the mountain village, to help remind those of the cost of war.
Jaguin’s voice faded when he felt Sara’s body relax. He raised his hand to tenderly brush a stray strand of her hair from her face before lightly tracing the curve of her jaw. A tender smile curved his lips at the peaceful expression on her face. Leaning down, he brushed a kiss across her forehead.
"Sleep, my mate. I will protect you,” Jaguin whispered. “Even in your dreams, we will protect you.”
Jaguin carefully switched the slightly crushed box in his left hand to his right. Leaning over, he placed itt on the table beside them and leaned back. He would give her the treats tomorrow when she woke.
Settling back against the cushion, he gazed out the window into the darkness of space. He was a shadow in her mind now. Whenever the dark memories rose, he replaced them with the happy ones he captured. He pushed away his own desire to strike out. There was no changing the past, they could only move forward. His eyes grew heavy, but his heart was light as he realized that Sara had given him a gift beyond measure. She had given him her trust.
“My precious, elila,” he murmured, sleepily. “So brave, so beautiful, so fierce.”
*.*.*
Far away, a golden figure stared into the swirling river of gold. The Valdier, Curizans, and Sarafin species considered her a goddess. She did not think of herself or her species as such. They were simply much older and had traveled vast distances through space and time, exploring, learning, and studying others.
On some worlds, they left a trace of their presence, while on others they were merely silent observers. They tried not to interfere if possible. It was not their way to command or change the course of a world. Yet, the more she studied this species and the new one her sisters discovered, she could not help but be curious about them.
Aikaterina watched the two figures in silence. Once again, this species drew something from deep inside her that she was unfamiliar with. Her fingers caressed the image of the two sleeping forms. Tiny strands of gold formed on each, adding a touch of her own blood mixed with the symbiot given to the warrior at birth. It was added protection to guard against the dark forces in the universe.
“I feel something, Aikaterina? You are well?” Arosa asked, settling down next to Aikaterina.
Aikaterina glanced up at the young figure of a woman. Arosa and her sister, Arilla, were very young for their kind. Aikaterina discovered them among the stars and invited them to return to Valdier with her. Their species were few and far between. Many were lost among the stars.
“Yes, I am well,” Aikaterina responded, looking down at the image of Jaguin and Sara.
Arosa tilted her head and stared at the two forms reflected in the river. “I like these species. There is something about them that makes them – different,” Arosa said with a smile. “They make me feel warm inside.”
“Yes, they do,” Aikaterina murmured, not adding that they made her feel something else – a longing to understand what it meant when they talked of love. “There is something I must do,” she said, floating upward.
“What? Do you need help?” Arosa asked, rising as well.
Aikaterina smiled serenely at Arosa and shook her head. “No,” she stated, lightly floating over the uneven stones. “This I must do alone. I will not be gone long. Please make sure that you and your sister do not cause trouble while I am away.”
“Who? Us?” Arosa teased, laying her h
and against her shimmering chest.
Aikaterina raised an eyebrow, but didn’t respond. Arosa and Arilla enjoyed spending time watching the human women that came to this world. They also enjoyed getting into mischief. With a sigh, Aikaterina waved her hand. A doorway appeared before her. Through it, millions of star systems could be seen beyond. Aikaterina flowed through the doorway.
“Where is she going this time?” Arilla asked her sister.
Arosa watched with a small smile. “I believe she is going back to the world of the human women,” she replied.
“Does this mean we can go visit with Abby, Cara, Trisha, and Ariel?” Arilla asked with a hopeful expression.
“Yes,” Arosa laughed. “Aikaterina just said we cannot cause trouble.”
Arilla rolled her eyes. “Now, where is the fun in that?” She laughed as she began to fade.
Chapter 10
Sara sleepily then froze when she felt a heavy weight holding her down. For a brief instant, fear held her paralyzed. Her eyes opened wide when she felt a shaft of warmth flood her. Almost immediately, her body relaxed – Jaguin, it was Jaguin’s arm around her.
“We fell asleep again,” she murmured, staring into his eyes.
His soft chuckle warmed her again, this time for a different reason. The guy was totally hot to look at first when waking up. She could honestly say that was not the case with her last two lovers. His amused look vanished and a dark scowl creased his brow.
“Mm, you heard that thought, didn’t you?” She murmured with a sheepish grin.
“Yes,” he grunted with an unhappy look.
Sara raised her eyebrow at him. “Are you a virgin?” She asked with a pointed look.
A dark flush rose in his cheeks and he shifted uncomfortably. She caught brief flashes of a variety of different women. There were definitely more than her two previous relationships.
“No,” he admitted with a slightly crooked grin.
“Enough said then,” Sara muttered, pushing up to a sitting position before she winced. “Ugh, we need a bigger couch.”
“Or a bed,” Jaguin agreed, rolling his head to relieve the stiffness in his neck.
Sara glanced at him and chuckled. His hair was sticking up in several different directions, he had a couple days growth of beard on his face, and he was giving her a boyish look of hope. She shook her head and swung her legs over the side, pausing when she saw the slightly crumpled package on the table.
“What’s this?” She asked, reaching for it.
“Chocolate. Carmen said it would make you happy,” Jaguin replied.
“Chocolate?” Sara breathed out, gripping the package like it was a precious artifact. “I’m a total chocolate whore.”
“I am not familiar with that term,” Jaguin responded with a confused frown.
Sara released a happy sigh as she ripped open the package. She picked out a piece of chocolate and breathed in the delicious aroma before she bit into it. The bittersweet flavor of the dark chocolate combined with rich caramel washed over her taste buds sending a wave of pure bliss through her.
She turned and held out the other half to Jaguin who instinctively opened his mouth to sample the tasty tidbit. His eyes widened at the explosion of flavor. He slowly chewed on it, understanding Carmen and Sara’s enjoyment of the delicate treat. It was almost as good as a tasty Maratts and Grombots. Both were considered a rare, delicious delicacy to Valdier dragons.
“There is no such thing as too much chocolate,” Sara stated, reaching for another one. “Or coffee.”
“Coffee?” Jaguin asked as he picked up another piece of the chocolate, this one in a different shape.
“Coffee has caffeine and is great for waking you up and giving you an energy boost to help keep you going,” Sara explained with a chuckle.
Jaguin released a slight shudder. “I do not think it would be good for Lord Trelon’s mate to have such a thing. She moves very quickly, all the time, and gets into everything without it. You will get to meet her. She is very tiny. She reminds me of a Maratt; very fast and hard to catch. I will ask her if she can program this treat into our replicators. Then, you will have as much of it as you wish.”
Sara laughed. “I’ll end up the size of a house if you do that,” she retorted with a sigh as she picked up her third piece. “Thank you, Jaguin.”
“For what?” He asked, a puzzled frown creasing his brow.
Sara’s gaze softened. “For being you,” she replied, leaning forward to brush a light kiss across his lips.
Jaguin’s expression cleared and he raised his hand to tenderly run it down Sara’s cheek. She turned her face into his warm palm, enjoying the rough texture. She had never been a real touchy-feely girl, but there was something about this strange alien male that she connected with.
“I have to report for duty soon,” he murmured. “I will meet you here later.”
Sara turned her gaze to his face. She nodded. He rose to his feet and held his hand out to her. She placed her hand in his and stood up. For several long seconds, they stared at each other.
“Sara,” he started to say.
“Jaguin,” she whispered at the same time before clearing her throat and smiling. “You go first.”
“I… Last night…,” he paused and ran his hand through his hair. “I wanted you to know that last night meant a great deal to me. You are one of the bravest females I have met.”
Sara shook her head. “No, not brave,” she murmured, lowering her gaze. “I was very, very frightened. I still am.”
She lifted her head when he gently slid his hand up to cup her chin. “You are to me,” he said, leaning down to brush a kiss across her upturned lips. “I am glad the goddess led me to you.”
Sara watched as he pulled back and straightened. Her fingers trembled as they rose to touch her lips. She could still feel the warmth of his lips against them. She felt another piece of the fragile wall she built around her heart crumble at his sincere words.
Stepping silently through the door, he murmured that he would meet her later. He lifted the hand he was holding to his lips and pressed a hot kiss full of promise against the back of it. Sara watched him turn and stride down the long corridor toward the lift at the far end. Her gaze moved down to the box of chocolate in her left hand after he disappeared from sight.
“I’m falling in love with him,” she whispered in shock. “What am I going to do?”
Her gaze lifted to stare down the empty corridor. She had cared for the men in her other relationships, but the wall around her heart was firmly in place and she never really let them get close to her. She was sad when the relationships ended, but she was also ready. This… This was different. This wasn’t just about companionship. This was about forever.
Sara blinked and turned when the lift opened and two warriors stepped out. She quickly retreated to her quarters. She needed time to think. Time to decide what path she wanted her life to take – a future where she would be able to return to her life back on Earth or an unknown future on an alien world.
*.*.*
Sara slowed as she stepped into the room later that evening. Jaguin was already there, standing next to the window. He appeared to be deep in thought.
Sara pushed down the overwhelming desire to walk over and wrap her arms around him. She could feel a change in the room, as if there was a wall between them. It took a moment for Sara to realize that it was the same type of wall that she always built between her and the world, she just never recognized it before.
“Hi,” she said, pushing her hands into the front pockets of her jeans.
She watched as Jaguin drew in a deep breath. He didn’t turn around to greet her; instead, he continued to look out into space.
“You can fight your feelings for me, Sara, but it will not change them,” Jaguin said in a quiet voice.
“How…? Oh,” she said, fingering the symbiot on her wrist.
Jaguin slowly turned to face her. His face was drawn, but his eyes glittered wi
th determination. Sara looked away from the heated gaze.
“I didn’t realize,” she started to say before her voice faded.
“We connected last night, Sara, in a way that usually happens only between true mates after the Dragon’s Fire is completed. We became one. I know your thoughts as you would know mine if you wished,” Jaguin said in a controlled tone. “You cannot lie to me, Sara. I know your true feelings.”
Sara swallowed and drew in a deep breath. She was not expecting this. The carefully crafted speech she planned to tell him flew from her mind at his softly spoken words. Inside, she flinched. She felt raw, exposed.
“Sara,” Jaguin muttered in a raw voice. “Give us a chance.”
“I can’t,” Sara whispered, finally looking up at him. “You know why. You know… I’m not like other women. I’m not made for a long lasting relationship. I don’t… I can’t fall in love with you.”
“I won’t hurt you or turn away from you, Sara. I am not like your aunt or cousins. I won’t leave you the way Delilah or your mother did, and I will never take you for granted, ” Jaguin said in a soft voice.
Sara’s chin lifted and she locked her jaw to keep it from trembling. Her arms wrapped around her waist and she curled her fingers into a fist to keep them from reaching out to him.
“My home…,” she whispered, staring at him when he shook his head and took a step toward her.
“Is now on Valdier, with me,” he said with a quiet certainty that shook her.
This time it was Sara’s turn to shake her head. She stared at him. She had fought with her own emotions all afternoon. The turning point was when she realized the power she gave Jaguin over her after she opened herself to him. When she was a child, she promised herself she would never do that again after her mom, in one of her rare visits, showed up for the last time. Selma Wilson brushed off the ten-year-old little girl that was still grieving as if she were an irritating insect.
Sara had opened her heart and her mother had torn it out and stomped on it. Her aunt was almost as bad, telling Sara that she should be thankful she wasn’t lying next to Delilah. When Sara cried out that she wished she were, her aunt looked coldly and said that at least it would be one less mouth to feed.
