“Okay.” He grips my hand more firmly as we change direction, heading for the other side of the garden. “It’s overgrown now. I can’t afford to pay for a groundskeeper.”
“Didn’t your grandmother leave an inheritance?”
“My parents shot that in their veins.”
“I still think about the day of the party. The last time I was here with my parents,” I say, wanting to change the subject.
“Me too,” he admits, stopping at the entrance to the maze. “I wanted to kiss you so bad that day.”
I tug on his hand, moving forward, taking a step into our past. Tall, unkempt shrubs tower over us, on all sides, as we walk, blocking out much of the light. The temp is cooler in here and I shiver.
“Over here,” he says, walking to the worn wooden bench off to the side. He sweeps some leaves and debris off it before sitting down, pulling me in close to his side. His arm goes around me. “Steal some of my body warmth.” He shoots me a lopsided grin. “Is this okay?”
I turn my head to face him, smiling softly. “Yes.” I examine his eyes. “I want to know everything, Galen. No matter how painful it might be to hear, I want to leave here with all the facts.”
He tucks a few stray strands of hair behind my ears. “I promise I will hold nothing back.”
I nod, seeing the truth in his eyes. “I wanted to kiss you too,” I admit, deciding to showcase my vulnerability first so he knows I’m in this with him. “But I was so broken, Galen. It was only a few months after the kidnapping, and I couldn’t bear even the slightest touch. Mom couldn’t kiss me good night and Dad couldn’t hold my hand without me freaking out.” Pressure settles on my chest as I remember how scared I was in the aftermath of my ordeal.
“I didn’t know.”
“How would you? You were a kid too, and I didn’t say shit to anyone.”
“Your rejection hurt,” he admits. “Because you’d been the only bright spot that entire day.” He smiles as he looks around. “I can still hear your giggles as I chased you through here.”
I smile back at him, snuggling in closer to his side, siphoning some of his warmth as I look up at him. “That was the first time in ages I’d laughed like that, and I remember feeling happy.”
“Until I had to go and ruin it.” He shoots me another lopsided grin.
I roll my eyes. “Like a typical boy.”
“Is it egotistical if I say I’m glad I was the one to make you laugh?”
“No.” I nudge him playfully in the ribs. “Typical guy sentiment.” I waggle my brows, and his smile returns, lighting up his whole face.
I know I’ve teased Galen about being pretty, but it’s no word of a lie.
Galen is a stunning man.
He could be a model with that mass of dark hair, piercing green eyes, thick, lush lips and high angular cheekbones I’d kill for.
“Keep looking at me like that, angel, and we won’t be doing much talking.” His husky voice penetrates skin, lodging bone deep, and a flurry of shivers skips through my veins.
I cup his face. “You’re beautiful, Galen. Hot as fuck, and I won’t deny I want you, but I’m not ready to take it there yet.”
He gulps, nodding. “It’s okay. I understand, and I can be patient.” His lips lift. “At least, I’ll try to be.” He brushes his thumbs across my cheeks as my hands drop to my lap. “And so there’s no confusion, I’m fucking hot for you, Lo, and I’m done pretending otherwise.”
“I’m glad we got that cleared up,” I joke, pressing a soft kiss to the underside of his jaw. “But now, you need to explain why you hated me so much.”
He tightens his hold on my arm. “It wasn’t so much you I hated as—”
“My father.” I finish for him.
He nods.
“Why? What did he do? Is this something to do with those pictures of your mom we found in his office?”
He grinds his teeth, and anger flashes in his eyes. “Yes.”
“Where did those boxes come from?”
“Your mom had them.”
“What? Why?”
“All I know is, she gave them to Sinner when he asked about your father’s paperwork. And we’re getting off point.”
I nod, urging him to continue with my eyes, parking that little nugget of information in the back of my mind to think about later.
I patiently wait for him to continue, and the longer he remains silent, battling an invisible enemy, the more anxious I become. “Galen, please. Just spit it out. I need to know.”
He looks at me, the hardness softening a smidgeon. “This is going to hurt you, Lo, and I promised I wouldn’t do that again.”
“Don’t hide behind that! This only works if we get it all out. I’m a big girl. I’ll handle it.”
“Your father had an affair with my mother, and it set off a whole fucked-up chain of events,” he blurts.
Okay, wait. What?
I shake my head. “No. No way. My father wouldn’t do that! He worshiped the ground my mother walked on!”
“I saw them myself!”
“What?” I whisper as pain slices across my chest.
“That same day. You’d run off on me after I tried to kiss you. I sulked out here for a while, and then, I went looking for you. I stumbled across your dad kissing my mom.”
Tears sting my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. “Are you sure it was him?”
“One hundred percent.”
“Maybe they were drunk, and it was only a onetime thing and—”
“He knocked her up,” Galen says, pursing his lips.
“What?” Tears pool in my eyes this time. I can’t believe what I’m hearing. “No!”
He presses his forehead to mine. “I’m sorry, Lo, but it’s true.”
I pull back from him. “How do you know?”
“I heard my parents arguing about it.”
Shock splays across my face. “Your father knew?” What kind of new sick, twisted shit is this?
“It seems so. He was fucking furious until Mom told him your dad gave her fifty grand for an abortion and her silence.”
I shuck out of Galen’s arm, standing and clutching my stomach as I double over. “This isn’t happening.”
“He didn’t want your mom to know. I watched my parents sign NDAs after they stopped bickering.”
Tears spill down my cheeks. Did I know my father at all? Has absolutely everything been a lie?
Galen stands, reaching for me, but I swat his arms away. “You blamed me for this?” I wave my arms in the air as my voice elevates a few notches. “How the fuck was any of this my fault?”
“It wasn’t,” he says, tucking his hands in the pocket of his jeans. “But after my sister died, the anger inside me mushroomed and mushroomed until I hated your dad and you.”
“Not my mom?”
“She was the innocent party in all of it. Her and Mya.”
“I was a fucking innocent party too!” I yell before frowning. “What did your sister have to do with it?”
He starts pacing, grabbing fistfuls of his hair. “Mya was born with a congenital heart defect. She’d had multiple surgeries over the years. Around this time, she started having problems. Was in and out of the hospital. She had a mini-stroke a few months before she died.” He drops down onto the bench, leaning his elbows on his knees and burying his face in his hands. His shoulders heave.
I calm myself down, rejoining him on the bench, although I’m careful to keep a distance between us, because I’m fucking mad at him. And furious at my father.
“I’m sorry for how you lost your sister. Genuinely, I am, Galen, but how is it connected?”
“They neglected her!” he yells, lifting his face to mine. His nostrils flare, and a splash of red creeps up his neck. “Your dad gave my mom fifty grand and it was like Mardi fucking Gras for my parents. They took that money and partied hard, leaving me and Mya to fend for ourselves. I was fourteen. She was ten. Grandma was sick, dying, and I didn’t want to burden he
r, so I tried my best. Took Mya to her appointments, made sure she ate and took her meds, but she was growing weaker, and my parents just weren’t there.” His voice cracks, and he buries his head in his hands.
His body shakes, and I let go of my anger, scooting over beside him, wrapping my arm around his back. “It’s not your fault. You were a kid, and your parents should’ve cared for their daughter better.”
“She died in my arms,” he mumbles, lifting his head and slumping against my body. “She had a massive heart attack. I called nine-one-one, but they got to us too late. I couldn’t save her,” he adds in a whisper, as a tear sneaks out of one eye.
Now, I get why saving his pathetic excuse of a mother means so much to him.
“Oh, Galen.” I hold him tighter. “No kid should have to go through that.”
He turns red-rimmed eyes on me. “Like no little girl should have to go through what you went through.”
Silent tears roll down his face. “It haunts me, Lo. I see Mya every night when I close my eyes, and I miss her so fucking much. Most little sisters annoy their older brothers, but Mya was never that for me. I loved everything about her. She had so much spirit, and she never complained even though her life was curtailed in so many ways because of her illness. She always saw the positive in every situation. My parents never deserved her.”
“They didn’t deserve either of you.” I rub my hand up and down his back, and he leans into me, pressing his forehead to my shoulder. I hold on to him as he clings to me, my mind churning with all I’ve learned. I still don’t understand why he hated me for this, but I’m not going to press him while he’s so upset.
Galen and I have already suffered enough for the sins of our parents, so I’m letting go of my anger, for both our sakes.
“The night I heard my parents fighting,” he continues, lifting his head but still keeping his arms around me, “Mom mentioned how much Trey loved you. She said everything revolved around you.” He has the decency to look ashamed. “I latched on to that. I made it all about you. In my head, you were the reason your dad started an affair with my mom and got her knocked up. And you were the reason he bought her silence, and in doing so, he set everything in motion. When Mya died, I have never felt so lost or alone. Saint and the guys were all I had. Then Dad overdosed, and Mom stopped trying. That anger burning in my veins fueled my vengeance. That was the reason I got up every day. I swore I would get revenge on your father.”
“And then Sinner killed him,” I say, fitting the pieces together.
“And I transferred my anger to you. It wasn’t that hard because you had my brothers in a tailspin.”
“This is so fucked up.” I sigh, letting my hands drop away from his body.
“You want to know what’s really fucked up?” He raises his hands to my neck, rubbing his thumbs up and down my skin, eliciting a rake of fiery tremors. “They say there’s a fine line between love and hate.”
I stop breathing for a second, eyes locked on his. “Don’t you dare say it,” I hiss after a few seconds. “I can’t hear that right now.”
His expression is contrite. “Doesn’t make it not true.” He removes his hands from my face, propping his elbows on his knees, and resting his chin in his hands. “I told you I’m fucked up.”
“Don’t turn this into a pity party, because you’re stronger than that.”
“Am I?” he turns toward me. “It feels like I’m running on empty these past few weeks.”
My anger dissipates again. “There is only one truth I know that matters anymore.”
He stares at me with an intense lens, waiting for me to elaborate.
“We’ve got to stick together. We’ve got to trust in each other and believe that together we can make this all right, because otherwise we’re doomed to lead lives we don’t want.” Fierce determination surges through me. “And I fucking refuse to accept that’s my destiny.”
CHAPTER 27
Harlow
“NO! PLEASE NO!” Galen thrashes about in the bed, crying out in his sleep, rousing me from my own troubled slumber. “You’re not dead! You’re not dead!” he whimpers, and that ache is back in my chest.
“Shush, babe.” I sit up, resting my back against the headboard as I reach out for him. The second my hands land on his back, he scoots forward, snuggling into me with his head in my lap. “It’s okay. I’m here. Go back to sleep,” I murmur.
His arm wraps around my thighs, and he whimpers again. My fingers thread through his hair and I lean down, dotting kisses on his cheek. I continue stroking his hair as I lean my head back and close my eyes.
It’s been an exhausting day, which seems to be the pattern of my life now.
When Galen asked me to stay here tonight, so he could keep a close eye on his mother, I wanted to tell him no. To explain I wanted to run a million miles from him and his horrid mother and this house full of terrible memories.
And that’s precisely why I stayed.
There is no point coming here, moving into this in-between space with Galen and then running off half-assed before it’s resolved. Best to confront it all head on.
I open my eyes as a slight breeze enters the room. I shiver and Galen’s arm clutches my thigh harder as he cuddles into me. I smile as I run my fingers over his hair, watching, as his murmurs fade and his breathing evens out, until he’s in a deep sleep. I’m happy one of us is. His long lashes fan out over his cheekbones, and air whooshes out of his gorgeous mouth in gentle puffs, and I could stare at him all night.
What a complex, broken soul he is. And so tortured. I’m happy I stayed now because this is what we both need. We didn’t have sex, and I doubt it was on his mind either. He seemed content to go to sleep wrapped around me, and it didn’t feel weird.
It felt right.
I lean down and press a kiss to his head.
I can’t hold on to my anger because Galen doesn’t deserve it. I’m going to offer him my forgiveness because it’s right and it’s what I feel in my heart.
It’s not pity.
It’s compassion.
He has been through so much, and even though he was misguided and so cruel to blame me for something I knew nothing about, and had no control over, he was so broken at the time, grieving his sister and drowning in responsibility.
And I get how afraid he was of me messing up the crew dynamic. The guys are all he has. When I waltzed into their lives, I shook everything up, bringing it all back to the present. Take that, and all this shit he’s going through with his mom, and Dar preying on his vulnerability at the perfect moment, and I see how it happened.
The brain can’t cope when it’s overloaded, and it’s exactly those moments when we make poor decisions.
At least, I understand it all now.
Movement at the door captures my attention, and I look up into Alisha Lennox’s pale-green eyes. I wonder how long she’s been standing there watching us. From the tears clinging to her lashes, I’d say it’s been a while.
“Stay, sweetheart,” she whispers when I move to lift Galen’s head from my lap. “Look after my boy.” She closes the door, careful not to make a sound.
I don’t want to leave Galen, but he’s sound asleep now, and I hope he won’t wake again, because I can’t waste this opportunity. I may not get another one where Alisha seems clearheaded, and I fucking want answers. Answers her son can’t give.
Very slowly and carefully, I slide out from under Galen, shoving a pillow under his head and another one in front of his torso. He curls around the pillow, and he looks so young even with his long muscular body, ink creeping up his arms, and the ring in his nose. I press a kiss to his temple before I pull on the hoodie and leggings I removed before bed and slip my feet into my Vans.
I try Alisha’s bedroom first, but the master suite is empty, so I pad downstairs to the kitchen.
She’s sitting at the long wooden table, nursing a bottle of water when I arrive. She looks up, not surprised to see me. “I imagine you have questions.
”
“I do.” I walk to the coffeepot, filling it with water and switching it on. “I think I’ll need coffee for this conversation.” We don’t talk as I wait for the coffee to fill. We just stare at one another, sizing each other up.
“Want one?” I ask, holding up a mug.
She shakes her head. “I’m good with water.”
“Is it safe to talk?” I inquire while pouring myself a black coffee.
“I disabled the camera in here. It’s safe.”
I take the seat across from her.
“How much do you know?”
“What Galen knows,” I admit.
“Which is?”
“You had an affair with my father. You got pregnant with his baby. Took his money to abort it and kept it a secret from my mom, your former best friend.” I glare at her, wanting her to see how much disdain I hold her in. “Used the money to fuel your party lifestyle, leaving your kids to fend for themselves. Your daughter died in your son’s arms, and he hasn’t stopped beating himself up over not saving her ever since. That about sums it up.”
“How did Galen find out? Did Sinner tell him?” she asks. The glass shakes in her hand, and her body trembles.
“Why would Sinner tell him?” I narrow my eyes, immediately suspicious.
“Because he set the whole thing up, and I feared one day he’d tell my son everything.”
“Which is?” I hiss, setting my mug down and straining forward. “What did that asshole do?”
“What hasn’t he done might be an easier question to answer.”
I drill her with a look, and she cracks a slight smile.
“You have her spirit you know. Giana is a fighter too.”
She clearly doesn’t know my mom as well as she thinks she does. “I didn’t come down here for compliments. I want answers.” I slam my hand down on the table. “I want to know why my father, the man I adored above all men, turned out to be a liar and a cheat. I need to know if any of it was real. And I need to know all the ways that bastard Sinner tried to ruin my family.”
“I will tell you what I know, but my son can’t hear this.”
“Why?”
“Because he doesn’t know the half of it, and if he finds out, I’m afraid of what he might do.” She reaches across the table, and her bony hand lands on top of mine. Her palm is sweaty, her fingers trembling.
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