by Idella Breen
The five-year-old paused in her eating to glance back. “Fix what?”
“Nothing! Nothing, at all!”
She frowned at Gwen before shrugging. “Okay.”
Gwen stared at the evidence that could lead to her demise for a moment before a solution presented itself. “Elena?”
“Yeah?”
“How do you feel about having short hair?”
Elena shrugged. “I don’t care. Never had it before but it might be nice.”
Gwen smirked evilly. “Let aunty help you out then.”
Holding her breath, Gwen knocked. The door flew open and she was met with the panicked gaze of Snow Bennett. Gwen fidgeted nervously but held up her hands. “I can explain. Just promise not to freak out.”
“Gwen, where is my daughter?” Snow spoke in such soft tones that Gwen paused before giving her explanation as a cold shiver of fear ran down her spine.
A toned arm wrapped around Snow’s waist as Cait pulled her wife into her chest and rested her head on her shoulder. “Give her a chance to explain, babe,” she said as she nuzzled softly into Snow’s neck. Electric blue eyes twinkled in laughter as they locked on Gwen’s and she realized that Cait was laughing at her expense. Gwen held back her annoyance and gave Cait her best puppy dog look.
Snow shuddered as Cait’s heat warmed the chill that permeated from her body and nodded. “You have five seconds before I turn you into a werewolf popsicle.”
Gwen nodded. “Elena is fine! I just wanted to explain things so that you didn’t freak out so much.”
“Explain what exactly?”
She sighed and turned around. “Sam, bring her over here.”
A hulking man appeared from around the corner and Snow had the faint realization that Cait must have known he was there along with their daughter. Sam was holding Elena’s hand but what gave Snow pause was the fact that Elena’s once long, flowing, waist-length hair, was now a short spiky mess of dark locks.
Gwen shuddered as the temperature dropped a few more degrees and she realized that she really didn’t want to turn around and face the ice princess. But, alas, this was mostly her fault. So, like the good responsible adult that she was, she turned around. “It’s all Sam’s fault! I had nothing to do with any of this!”
“Hey!” The hulking man whined. “This was your idea!”
“Lies! I was against the whole thing! You won’t take me alive!”
“Gwen,” Snow’s voice was steady making the werewolf cringe.
“Yes?”
“Give me a reason why I shouldn’t retaliate?”
Cait’s sudden burst of laughter broke the tension, warming the room slightly. “Elena! You’re adorable. Come here, sweetheart.” The redhead kneeled down and opened her arms to receive her daughter as the girl burst into giggles.
“What on earth happened to you, baby?” Cait asked as she lifted the girl up and rested her on her hip. Elena loosely wrapped her arms around her mother’s neck and nuzzled her cheek before pulling back and grinning. “Aunty Gwen wanted to know what I would look like with short hair, but when she tried to make me look pretty, Sammy bumped into her, and she made an uh oh.”
Cait laughed and ran her fingers through her daughter’s short locks. “How does it feel?”
Elena rested her finger on her chin, in an adorable rendition of Cait, then shrugged. “I feel lighter and not as hot.”
The redhead nodded. “Is that a good thing?”
The little girl tilted her head slightly. “It’s not a bad thing.”
Cait kissed her on the cheek making her giggle. “That settles it then! Everything should be fine Snow. It will grow back. Just try and think of this as a free haircut. Besides, Gwen did a good job styling this. I think the wild look suits out little werewolf, don’t you?”
Snow couldn’t hold in the small smile after witnessing her two favorite people interacting in such a loving manner and conceded at her wife's explanation. She leaned in and kissed Elena on the cheek and lightly touched the soft midnight locks. Cait was right, the wild look did suit their little monster.
She turned back to Gwen. “Just be careful next time, please.”
Gwen gulped and nodded vigorously. “It will never happen again!”
“See that it doesn’t.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Cait smirked. “Were you planning on staying for a little bit?”
She shook her head. “I’m meeting someone after this. Why?”
“I just thought I should mention that Snow and I will be leaving on a trip for a while. Elena will be staying with her grandparents but she will continue to have her weekly classes with you.”
Gwen felt her gut flip. This was her usual reaction whenever someone talked about leaving. It was a problem that Remus had told her to get ahold of as it tended to result in her doing something stupid. She knew this about herself and yet the only thing resounding in her mind was one question and flashback to accompany it. Leaving? Gwen gulped as she tried to fight off the sudden onslaught of irrational panic. “Where are you going?”
“Snow has to do some political training for her mother.”
“Oh, that sounds boring,” Gwen said and tried to play off the gloomy feeling and the itch of trepidation that began to take over her mood.
Cait chuckled. “Believe me when I say it won’t be.”
“How long will you be gone?” Sam asked.
Snow frowned. “Two years.”
“What!” Gwen yelled, only for Sam to cover her mouth.
“Would you quiet down? We are in the hallway. All the neighbors can hear you!”
Gwen pulled his hand away. “Did you say two years?”
Snow nodded.
“What the hell?”
Cait laughed. “It’s not that bad Gwen. We will be back before you know it. Two years in our long lifespans will be nothing but a blip in our memory.”
“But, what about Elena?”
“Integra is more than enough to handle her for the time being. On top of that, she has you and the rest of the Lander clan to help her werewolf develop safely. I trust you guys. You’re family.”
Gwen paused as her eyes suddenly began to tear up. She sniffed and wiped at them before growling softly. “Damn you Cait Fallon and your sweet talking. Don’t think that I’ll miss either of you!” she yelled, before stomping off towards the elevator. She could hear Sam saying something to them even as she furiously pushed the call button. Once the doors finally opened, she threw herself inside and pressed the button to close them, not waiting for Sam. She didn’t want to wait for him, she didn’t want to wait for anyone, she just wanted to be alone and feel sad without having to explain why to twenty different people.
The doors closed, and she leaned back against the rail, letting the tears flow freely. What was wrong with her? Normally, something like this wouldn’t hit her so hard. She had been working on her issues with Remus, and yet, it was a surprise. There had been no warnings about this sudden development. Usually, if something big like this was going to happen within her inner circle of friends, Remus would bring it up, but Cait and Snow weren’t officially part of her clan. They were honorary members. They weren’t Lander’s as Cait retained the name Fallon, and the title of alpha for her clan, no matter how small it was at the moment. Why should they have warned her? It wasn’t even really her business. Yet, they were family. She felt like they were family. Cait had called her family, and Elena referred to her as an aunt. Gwen sighed, as she wiped furiously at her eyes, while simultaneously wondering if her cycle was coming up, and cursing whatever higher power there was for making women so emotional.
Her moment of grief was interrupted when she heard the jingle of her cell phone. After a moment of debate, she decided to at least see who was interrupting her self pity party and was surprised to see that it was Silvia. She also happened to see the date at the top of her screen and inwardly groaned. It was her red week. That would explain everything. Her eyes then caught the time
and her groan nearly turned into a whine. She was late. Her heart hammered in her chest as she slid her finger across the screen.
“Hello, Gwen Lander speaking.”
“Gwen? This is Silvia. We spoke earlier today,” came the husky voice.
A smile unconsciously took over her face. “Silvia! Hi, how are you?”
She suddenly felt stupid for how happy she was at hearing the other woman’s voice and cursed her hormones. Gwen tried to control the overflow of feelings. She was not used to having this sort of reaction to people.
“Hi,” she chuckled. “I just wanted to make sure you were still coming today?”
Gwen frowned. “Of course I am. Why?”
“Well, it’s three o’clock now.”
She winced. “I’m so sorry! I know I’m late but I can still come. I just got caught up in some things.”
Gwen heard a muffled sound followed by rushing wind. “I would love to wait but I have somewhere that I have to be now. Would you mind if we reschedule?”
The gloomy feeling was back with a vengeance and she couldn’t keep it from her voice when she answered, “I would like that. I’m really sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it. I have to go now, but I’ll call you later tonight, and we can make plans. I’d really like to see you.”
“Of course! That works for me.”
“Great! I’ll talk to you later then, Gwen.”
“Okay.”
“Bye.”
“Bye.” Gwen hung up and stared at her phone. She was happy that they could still meet and a bit anxious which was to be expected but it still didn’t feel like a date for some reason. It felt more like she was meeting with a stranger that could potentially be more. What that more turned out to be had yet to be seen? It was true that she felt drawn to Silvia and for now, that was enough. The elevator door dinged and opened. The happy feeling left in a gasp of breath as Sam stood on the other side with a frown on his face. He must have taken the stairs to beat her.
“I think we need to talk,” his gruff voice held an air of authority and she knew she had been found out.
6
Sam stood in front of Gwen’s only exit like a guardian of the dead. Her only way past was to walk through him and that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.
“Gwen — ”
“I don’t want to talk about it, Sam.”
“Gwen — ”
“What part of me not wanting to talk about this did you not understand — ” she cut herself off when his hand landed on her shoulder and held her back when she tried to move by him to make her escape. Gwen looked at the offending appendage with disdain and trailed her eyes up to the connecting arm before meeting the deep frown that adorned her friends face.
“What?” she asked.
“I said that we need to talk so that’s what we’re going to do.”
Gwen scowled. “What if I don’t want to talk?”
“I’m concerned about you — ”
“Don’t give me that concern bullshit again!”
Sam’s frown mixed with surprise and Gwen felt a little proud at being able to catch him off guard. It gave her a small burst of satisfaction. She sighed. “I’m tired of talking about everything before I can do it. I’m twenty-six Sam! I can make my own decisions about my life now.”
“Are you sure about that?”
Gwen scowled. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?” She shook his hand off and he folded his arms over his chest making the muscles bulge. As a potential beta, Sam was one of the larger wolves in the clan.
“It means that you might not be thinking straight.”
“And why wouldn’t I be thinking straight?”
He shrugged. “Why don’t you tell me that?”
“Sam, this is ridiculous! I don’t have time for this. I’m leaving.”
Gwen moved around him but he reached out and grabbed her wrist. She turned back to him, a deadly look in her eye. “Let go of me, Sam,” she said slowly.
He smirked. “Make me.”
Gwen felt the red hot fury building in her chest, the likes of which she hadn’t felt in years. She stilled, trying to hold it in, but it was slowly forcing its way out like as pot boiling over. A shudder ran through her body before she met Sam’s gaze in an obvious challenge. “I’ll say it one more time. Let go.”
His response was only the tightening of his grip. Her anger erupted inside of her, and she felt it like a tidal wave burning through her veins. She released pheromones that sent alarms going off in Sam’s instincts. He released her writs with a gasp as he grabbed at his head and shivered. Gwen took his moment of distraction and ran with everything that she had. She heard him yelling after her for her to come back, but she must have really shocked him, as he could have given chase at any moment and caught up with her strides in a matter of seconds. He far surpassed her in athletic ability, and despite her best efforts to improve that part of herself, she was never able to increase her abilities above the average werewolf.
So, the fact that she escaped, even though she had the element of surprise, was only because he had let her. Why had he let her escape? Maybe, she had surprised him enough or maybe he was more surprised that she was so determined to get away from him that she would use her omega abilities on him. Because that’s what she did. As the omega, Gwen had a large sway within the clan. She could calm down even the most rabid of werewolves and have them see reason but she had learned the hard way when she was younger that her abilities could also work in the opposite way. Just like a moment ago, she was able to force her anger out to Sam. It wasn’t so much that she had burnt him but the pheromones that her anger gave off awoke a deeply rooted instinct within his wolf. That was why he released her.
It was the reason she was always so careful to control her emotions and the reason she attempted to stay positive especially around other clan members. But, she knew better than most that no one, no matter how saintly people thought that they were, could keep away from negative emotions. She was a mortal like everyone else and she got pissed off when she was hungry and irritable when she pulled an all-nighter.
Gwen stopped, about three blocks away from where she had parted with Sam, to catch her breath. She leaned heavily against a stop sign garnering her some strange looks from a few people but she couldn’t have cared less. Looking up into the overcast sky, she finally felt like some of her burdens were released. It was rare that she ever got to go out alone. Rarer still, that she could be in town alone unless she fought tooth and nail for the privilege. Sometimes, Remus would let her roam his land by herself as it was mostly safe save for a few predators but she could handle herself against most of the animals that inhabited his land. She was a werewolf after all. For some reason, it seemed that she just had to keep reminding people of this fact lately.
Leaning her head against the cool metal, she released a sigh and stood up straight. Moving forward, she melded into the crowd moving in the opposite direction from home. She had a few hours to kill and she didn’t plan on spending it at home or wherever she called home for the week. As the omega, Gwen had always been provided for. That included lodging, food and anything she could need. But none of it was her own. Her lodging consisted of being moved from house to house among her clansmen.
Most of the time, she found herself sleeping at Remus’s house as he was the alpha and a bachelor, but on occasion when she needed a break from his domineering way, she would go couch-surfing. Even couch-surfing could only last for so long, though. Eventually, she would overstay her welcome at whoever’s house she was encroaching on and she would eventually find herself back at Remus’s house.
Essentially, she was slowly but surely being smothered to death. If she could just get some of her space back to get some independence from her clan, then she might be able to get a better perspective. Then she might not feel like she can’t even go to the bathroom without three people asking her, where she was going, and how long she was going to be, only to then
basically sit outside the bathroom door to make sure she didn’t need any help. She was an adult! Of course, she didn’t need any help!
Gwen glanced to her left to see a quaint little restaurant across the street. It was the kind that had seating outside on the sidewalk around it and a few families and couples were enjoying the day as it turned to late afternoon and the early dinner crowd began to show up. The summer heat had broke for a few hours and it was a bit cooler now. Gwen smiled as she watched a little girl in a booster seat yammering away to her mother and father about everything under the sun.
Her smile turned wistful. “I wonder what my parents are up to today?” She whispered.
She squashed the sentiment as soon as it had come. It didn’t solve anything thinking such things besides to make her depressed as she couldn’t fix the problem short of turning back time. And everyone knew that no matter how much someone wanted too, no one could turn back the clock. The past was over, only the present and future were worth worrying about and she already had plenty on her plate at the moment.
Gwen turned to continue moving through the town but paused when the scent of jasmine invaded her senses. She glanced back up to the restaurant only to pause in shock. There in the parking lot, hugging another woman, was Silvia. The woman was her complete opposite. Where Silvia was all light and sharp edges, this woman was dark and solid muscle. A pain so acute it was sharp, cut through her heart and twisted deep in her belly. She reached out to grasp a rail along the sidewalk separating the restaurants from the pedestrian walkway. The blade twisted back when she watched Silvia kiss the woman on her cheek and pull back, smiling with such open and honest affection, that Gwen knew she could never compare to the other woman no matter how hard she might try.
She couldn’t handle this, was her first coherent thought quickly followed by, I have to get out of here! Gwen staggered down the sidewalk nearly bumping into a man who might have said something but all she could hear was a loud ringing in her ears that could only have been associated with the sound of her heart-shattering.
