by Brynn Paulin
Though I’d expected her to shoot me down, I was sure glad she’d agreed. Her walls were still up—way up. But maybe I could get her to lower then for me. Get some answers. Maybe.
She held herself carefully away from me, her arms crossed, hands cupping her elbows as she studied the land around us. Defensive. Withdrawn. I had hard work ahead of me if I wanted to fix our relationship. I just wished I knew what I was fighting, why she’d left in the first place. From the words we’d exchanged so far, I doubted she’d just tell me if I asked.
And fix us? Yeah, I guess I did want that. I really did. The longer I stood here with her, the more I needed it.
First, the tour then I’d get her to relax a little.
My hand swept around our surroundings. “First up, you should be pretty familiar with this area. It hasn’t changed much other than coats of paint since the last time you were here. Main house. Horse barns. Clinic. Equipment barn. Feed stores. The office is new, though.”
“Mostly the same,” she agreed. “But spiffed up. The new gate was pretty shiny.”
“Yeah…” I took off my hat and ran my hand through my hair. I needed a haircut. Jorie’s fingers curled as she watched, and her thumb ran along the backside of those digits. Did she want to touch me? When we’d started dating, she’d run her fingers through my hair while we’d lain under the stars of while we’d watched a movie or kissed. She’d told me she loved the feel under her fingers.
I jammed my hat back on my head, cutting off my thoughts. “Missy thought it would be more appealing to guests. I’m not sure—”
“Why do you need your spread to be more appealing?”
She didn’t know the whole operation had changed? I stared at her. She didn’t know…
“We’re a vacation ranch now. Tourists come in, and I give them the Texas ranch experience—a watered-down version anyway. I mean, who really wants to shovel manure? Sometimes, we host weddings, do fishing expeditions, riding lessons, give the basic cattle ranching adventure—we make it sound all fancy to be a cowboy. Of course, if someone wants to just have a laid-back week away from city life, we can do that, too.”
“A dude ranch?”
“A guest ranch,” I corrected, fighting the need to grit my teeth. “A vacation destination.”
Her lips quirked, and I knew I’d hear about this again. “Okaaaaay.” She looked at the house. “And they stay here?”
“Oh hell no. I don’t want no strangers in my space. That’s why I built the office extension.”
She nodded, her dark-brown eyes dancing. A breeze lifted loose strands of her hair, and I longed to reach out and brush them from her face. She swiped them back and tucked them behind her ears. “And where do they stay? In the office? Tents?”
“Cabins. Quarter mile that way.” I pointed to the long structure, just barely visible in the distance. “Eight rooms, all with quad occupancy. The dining hall and kitchen run along the back. We’re booked solid most weeks. We’ve got a bunch of bachelors here this week, before the rest of wedding party gets here for the weekend.”
“You’re hosting a wedding this weekend?”
I shrugged. “We’ve done quite a few the past couple years. The fucking wedding planner for this one is driving me crazy. Eventually, I’d like to do it in-house; tell people if they have their event here, they have to use our planner. Pipe dreams.”
“Ambitious, but not such a pipe dream,” she replied, almost under her breath. Her eyes lit with new wonder and little longing as she studied everything. I could almost see the thoughts running through her head. Could I lure her back? Promise her…what? A job? I wanted to slash away the years that separated us and promise her everything, including the relationship I’d always wanted us to have. I knew she’d run from that. It would be too soon, too.
We’d both grown and changed. Maybe, we wouldn’t be compatible anymore.
Bullshit.
One look and everything in me remembered—no, knew!—this was the girl I’d always been meant for, and her for me.
“And you run it all from here?” she asked. “You don’t think the office should be closer to the guests?”
“I still have the ranch to run,” I explained. “I need to be close to the crew. With my office here, I can run over to do paperwork and shit whenever I can fit in a moment. Which isn’t often enough—that’s what Missy was talking about.”
Her eyes narrowed. “You’re running the ranch, guest lodging and activities and doing all the admin? Who’s helping you?”
“I’ve got a good crew for the ranch op. Max leads a bunch of the expeditions and activities. Missy cleans, does all the cooking, helps out with some ordering and stuff. She gets stuck dealing with some of the event stuff, too, but she hates it. Now that she’s pregnant, I can’t have her doing so much. It’s not good for her or the baby. I’ll probably have to hire a couple temps to fill in for her—maybe to replace her, depending on what she decides to do when she’s further along. It’s up to her. Of course, I help with the guests a lot, too.”
“And who’s helping you?” she asked again. “With overseeing everything? With all the hands on? Your mom? Your dad?”
I shook my head. “Just me. Garrett Mathews gave me a lot of advice and help when I started out.” I wasn’t ready to talk about why or how I’d gotten here. I led her toward the ATV I used to run about the ranch. Guests got the all-horses-all-the-time experience, but for real life, this was more expedient.
“Climb on,” I said as I straddled it. I jerked my head to indicate she should climb on behind me. Biting her lip, she hesitated. I just waited. It wasn’t as if we hadn’t ridden together like this hundreds of times before. Fuck, I’d been eight the first time my dad had let me drive a four-wheeler alone. When Jorie had started coming out practically every day, she’d taken to riding with me.
I knew those memories had to be playing through her head, along with thoughts of our secret dates. Maybe the last time she’d had her legs around me. I started to get hard and shifted slightly. I turned my stare to the distance as I tried to get it under control. My groan was barely suppressed when she climbed behind me. Her long legs bracketed mine as she pressed to my back, her arms around my middle.
Immediately, her sweet citrus scent filled my senses. I was dying, and I didn’t know if this was heaven or hell. Her legs were finally around me again, her small, perfect breasts pressed against me, her hands on my abs.
Yeah, this was hell. I was overloaded by arousing sensations, and I couldn’t do a damn thing about it. I certainly couldn’t drag her fingers just inches lower and show her just how stimulated I was at having her close.
Trying to focus, I grabbed her hands and gave them a squeeze, using our silent communication for “hang on tight,” then took off toward the guest quarters.
Jorie laughed as the wind whipped around us, and I purposely took a rutted path to bounce us around, just as I would have when we were younger. The side-benefit was the way it jerked her body against mine. Okay, when I was a teenager, I might have taken the bumpy route for the same reason. I groaned aloud at the pleasurable friction, grateful she couldn’t actually hear me over the engine and the air rushing past us.
All too soon, I skidded to a stop behind the long building. A wide, covered porch spanned the length, with groupings of rockers, tables and chairs along the expanse. The dining hall’s large windows were flung open to allow fresh air and a bit of breeze to flow through the space. Inside, ceiling fans whirred overhead and kept the room remarkably cool. On particularly oppressive days, though, we cooled with forced air and kept everything closed up. This week it was mild, however.
Missy kept the space spotless, the wood surfaces gleaming and the floors polished, despite the boot traffic coming through on a near-constant basis. Rather than a lingering food smell, the pleasant scent of clean country air and lemon oil permeated the area. It was a space I could be proud of and added to the guests’ comfort and enjoyment during their stays.
Holding open one of the
screens to the wide, double-doored entryway, I ushered Jorie inside. It hit me how gratified I was to be able to show this to her, to show her what I’d built and how successful I’d made this vacation-ranch venture. Sure, my office and paperwork were a dumpster fire, but financially, I was doing well. We’d been so profitable I’d even paid off my loans earlier this year. The ranch’s worth just kept growing. In the next couple years, I might even look at expanding the guest operation with a second set of guest lodgings. It’d be a lot of work, but with the right partner by my side…
I glanced over at Jorie then immediately nixed my thoughts. It was too early to think things like that, even with our history. Too much lay between us over these past five years. We had a lot to hammer out.
With her anger, I wasn’t sure we could ever be more than old acquaintances. Hell, I wasn’t sure we could ever be friends again. I had to find out what had happened to make her run away. I had to know how to win my cowgirl back.
Chapter Four
~ Jorie ~
Still buzzing with awareness from the ride over here, I looked around the dining hall. Nash watched me as I took in the polished wood floors and walls. There was nothing utilitarian about the space. Part of the room was set up with a sunken conversation area, outfitted with couches, club chairs and low tables. It was large enough to accommodate all the guests should they want to gather together. The upper area had dining tables, all made of heavy natural wood. The whole thing had the feeling of a spacious lodge, not a lunchroom.
“And you host gatherings here?”
“Some,” he said as he led me past the tables. “Our normal end-of-the-week parties are here. We won’t have one this Saturday, because of the wedding they’ll all attend. We have those huge party tents for those.”
“Makes sense. Temporary floors?”
“Of course. There’s also a pavilion by the lake for smaller, more intimate ceremonies and parties.”
“Quite the setup, Mr. Davidson.” Honestly, I was impressed, he’d morphed his ranch into something I’d never imagined. So far, everything I’d seen was well-done and seemed well thought out. Nothing appeared haphazard, slapped together or an afterthought.
He led me into a silver-chrome/stainless-steel dream. “This is Missy’s domain. In here, she plans and oversees all the meals for guests and ranch staff and food for events. We contract some staff for events, but she manages them. She’s overseeing everything for the wedding this weekend, too.” He leaned close. “I think she wants to punch the planner in the face. That woman is pissing off Missy, too.”
“Fun,” I said with heavy sarcasm.
“You have no idea.”
I glanced around the kitchen as we continued through it. I wasn’t much for cooking, since Gran and Aunt Macy lorded over their kitchens, but I could see where someone would love this space. I might even like cooking here, given the chance. Usually, I ate on the run or had meals prepared by the aforementioned. Whenever I had cooked, I was good at it and kind of enjoyed it. It just wasn’t often.
Nash pointed out another door that led to staff dining. He explained not all the cowboys interacted with the guests and preferred the separation. Looking around, I could see Missy kept everything spotless and gleaming. I had to admire her for excelling at the immense task. It was obvious she took pride in this place, which was good for Nash. I wondered how she kept their house. All the work here must be exhausting.
His hand settled lightly at the small of my back as he led me back out of the kitchen into the main hall. I tried to ignore it. He’d hurt me. He belonged to someone else. Unfortunately, my stupid emotions and aroused nerve-endings wanted to forget those things.
While I rallied, Nash indicated the doors along the back wall. “Those are the guest rooms. They have front and back doors. Front goes outside; back comes here.” Going to the wall beside the kitchen, he opened a hidden panel with a push latch then punched a code into the keypad. Inside were eight sets of keys. He took one then relocked everything. “We thought of upgrading to keycard entry, but people seem to prefer keys…like it’s more homey or rustic or something.”
“Don’t you worry about them getting lost?”
He shook his head. “We have spares, and people are pretty careful when they know they’ll get charged a fee for losing them. You know…like they would with car rentals. Anyway, a couple of the rooms aren’t occupied this week. I thought maybe you’d like to take a look.”
“Sure.” I shrugged, desperately trying not to remember the last time I’d been in a room with a bed with him…the last time I’d been in a bed with him.
I’d gotten the impression the rooms were big, but when he opened the cabin door, I was surprised to enter not a large room, but a suite. We walked into a small but airy sitting area with arched doorways to either side. I wandered to one and saw a bedroom with a double bed.
“The other bedroom is similar,” Nash said from the entryway where we’d come in. He didn’t move as I looked around, just watched me. I wondered if he remembered the same thing I did. Or was he trying not to remember.
“This is really nice,” I said. Like with the dining hall, everything was so neat, clean and homey. No wonder the place had done so well. Who wouldn’t love it here and want to come back or tell their friends all about it? Or both? “Why did you put sitting rooms in the cabins when you have the big area in the dining hall?”
He shrugged and studied me, making me wonder what he was thinking. “Sometimes, people don’t feel like being social. Also…newlyweds. We don’t need to see that out there…if you get my meaning. Mostly, this is another place to relax,” he said, sweeping his hand to indicate the whole ranch. “Providing a space like this offers another place to decompress.”
“Makes sense. Okay, so what’s next?”
“The pavilion at the lake? The office? There’s not really a lot to see, per se. It’s mostly a lot to do.”
“Okay. Show me this so-called mess in your office, then,” I offered. The lake would offer up too many memories from our past. Our first date…our first kiss, too…had been a picnic at that small lake.
He nodded, and after he put back the key, we headed out to the four-wheeler. I considered asking him if I could walk back. I still throbbed with the need that had arisen inside me when we’d ridden over here with my body clasped so tightly to his. Climbing back on the ATV and pressing my thighs around him seemed like a little bit of hell and a sensual torture that would end in frustration. But I had no choice.
Suppressing a groan and holding my breath, I climbed behind him and put my arms around his hard torso. Earlier, I’d felt his defined six-pack abs through his thermal shirt. And when I’d breathed him in, a thousand recollections had exploded across my senses. His clean, invigorating scent…musky male mixed with the freshness of spring, and I’d realized he still wore Cool Water cologne. We’d picked that out together our freshman year of high school. Did he remember that?
It filled my senses again as I breathed in, trying to relax, trying not to cry for what we had lost. I had to remember how he’d betrayed me, that we could be civil, but I couldn’t be attracted to him. I couldn’t fall for him again. We couldn’t go there. I could forgive him—we’d been so young—but I didn’t have to forget.
Maybe, we could manage to be friends again.
That was what my head said. Everything else begged me to jump him.
I had to be stronger than that. My fingers flexed into his rock-hard belly, betraying me. I sighed, but that only drew me deeper under his spell.
I was so fucked.
No no no! Stop!
I had more control that that. I didn’t have to fall prey to my hormones.
Besides… He’s with Missy. Off-limits!
Thankfully, we got back to the office in nothing flat, and I jumped off the vehicle as if I were on fire.
“Um, maybe, you can show me your office another time.”
Nash’s eyes narrowed on me. “What’s wrong?”
�
��Nothing.”
“Nothing?”
“Nope. Nothing.”
He crossed his arms. I crossed my arms and stared back.
“Jorie, if you leave right now, you’re not coming back. I know that. You know that. Don’t.” He shook his head. “We need to talk, and… Fuck, Jorie…” His hand went through his hair again, his hat clasped in his free fist. “I want my best friend back. Forget everything else. You don’t have to tell me what happened right now. Tell me…someday. Just…come back. I need you in my life. You’re my closest friend. You’re everything.”
I blinked at him, fighting the tears welling in my eyes. I wasn’t everything as he claimed, but I understood the rest. I’d missed him so much. Still thinking it was a terrible idea to be here, to be near him, I nodded. “Okay. Show me.”
He opened the office door then led me through a reception area and into his office. “There are actually two offices,” he said. “I’ve just been using this one. Everything’s here. I can use the other one, and you—or whoever takes the job—can have this one.”
I raised my brows and smirked. “What a gift.”
What had he called the office? A dumpster fire? God forbid there be a fire here. There were stacks of paper everywhere. The desk was covered. There were stacks on the floor and atop the credenza. I think there was a laptop in there somewhere. I could see the cord.
“Smartass.”
“No, seriously, Nash. Is there anything in the filing cabinet?”
He shrugged and gave me a half smile. I don’t think it was my imagination that his cheeks pinked a little. He scratched the back of his neck. “Some, but it’s old.”
I held my hands out, looking around in disbelief. “How do you even…pay your bills? Keep track of reservations? Payroll?”
He pointed at a blotter calendar and dry-erase board behind me on the wall facing the desk. “All the reservation and assignments go on there. I have them in the computer calendar, too. And this pile,” he tapped the stack overflowing a decorative wire basket, “is all the current bills.”
