by Hanna Peach
She felt like she had been punched in the stomach at the familiar sight of his boyish face and thick lashes. It wasn’t just someone that looked like him, it was Xavier. Another old flock mate. No, it couldn’t be. Alyx staggered back, semi-aware that her heavy feet were making too much noise against the dirt. What was he doing here? She knew there had been something wrong when she saw the first ’Shadow guards. Prickles of fear spread through her body. What the hell was going on?
“You can do better than that, Alyx.” The familiar voice from behind her made her throat tighten.
Symon. She felt the air move before she heard the sound of his blade. Alyx spun to the side, unsheathing her sword. Her blade struck against his thick broadsword. “Dirty Rogue.” Symon’s face twisted in disgust and hate. It stabbed Alyx in the chest as if he had actually pierced her.
Double-handed, Symon twisted his blade around hers in what she recognized as one of his disarming moves. She countered it and managed to untangle her blade from his. Flicking her legs out to her side, she kicked off the wall of the building to twist in the air above him. She lashed out with her sword tip. But it wasn’t an accurate aim and it was without her usual power. This was Symon, her mentor…her family.
He knocked it aside as if it were nothing and launched off the ground. Alyx’s eyes widened when she realized he was coming for her. She tried to move out of the way, holding her sword across the front of her body as a shield, but he was too fast. His sword clashed with hers as he knocked her back against the other wall with a jarring shudder. Now she was trapped against his powerful body and the rough bricks behind her.
His blade inched closer to her throat. This close she could see the sweat beading across his furrowed brow.
“Did you learn nothing from me, Alyx?” he snarled at her. “You are such a disappointment.”
Alyx felt a final stab of pain from his words before the anger rushed up inside her, overtaking everything else. She shoved her knee up into his crotch. His face contorted as her knee connected with the delicate flesh. His body tensed and his sword stopped pushing against hers. She kicked again and managed to push him off her. Symon moved backwards in the air clutching at himself.
He cursed at her.
Alyx tossed her sword straight up in the air. She drew out both boot daggers and spun them out at Symon. They embedded in his shoulder and in his stomach before he could knock them away. His eyes widened and he froze mid-air. Then he looked down at his two wounds.
Alyx caught her sword handle and leapt forward, driving the point deep into his heart. “I’d say you were the disappointment, Symon.”
Symon’s blue eyes glistened as they met hers. His sword fell from his limp fingers. He tried to speak but only succeeded in sputtering up blood onto his lips.
Alyx felt her body grow cold. The coldness swept across her like an arctic wind, carrying away all of that blinding hot rage. Symon fell from the air. His body thudded to the dirt below.
What had she done?
Alyx dropped to the ground, her boots clomping heavily. She wanted to move to his side, but her legs wouldn’t go.
Symon’s pale lifeless face and bright blue eyes stared accusingly at her. Oh God. She killed him. What if this wasn’t a ’Shadow? What if it was really Symon? What if he had found a way into this DreamScape?
Guilt, thick and black like tar, began to poison her blood. Alyx felt the scream welling up inside her, starting to choke her. She stumbled back. Into a hard body. She whirled around, sword at the ready. Her mind was racing so much that she didn’t register his pale green eyes.
“Alyx, it’s me.” Jordan’s worried voice cut through her fog.
“Jordan…” Alyx felt her sword drop from her fingers. “I…killed him.”
“It’s okay. He’s not real.”
“It doesn’t matter. I killed him.”
Jordan waved his hand over Symon’s body and it faded into nothing. “See? He’s not real. Just a ’Shadow.”
“But…how did he...?” Alyx choked out. “And Xavier…and… I thought…I thought…”
“We’re in the subconscious world, remember? Whatever you have hidden away can filter out here. You fear seeing them again…”
Alyx remembered the haunted look that Vix had gotten as she saw the female figure that had appeared in the distance when they had been in the Elder’s DreamScape together. Vix’s subconscious had caused her to appear, just as Alyx’s had caused Xavier and Lutando and Symon to appear.
Alyx felt the blood drain from her limbs as Symon’s face, dead and lifeless by her hand, appeared in her mind. “Oh my God, Jordan. What if…what if I see him again? For real?” Her skin felt cold and it was as if a thief had whipped through her body, stealing away all her warmth with it. “What if I…” Her voice trailed off.
What if… What if she had to kill him? Could she? If it meant her life against Symon’s? Or Jordan’s life against Symon’s?
She shuddered at the contrast of Jordan’s warm hands on her face. He tilted her face so that she would look at him.
“Hey,” he said, his eyebrows drawing together in concern. “I’m not going to lie to you, Alyx. That is a very real possibility. But you won’t have to face him alone. You won’t. I’ll be there with you.”
She let Jordan pull her to his chest. His arms seemed to be the only thing warming her at the moment as she relived the feeling of her blade entering Symon’s body. It didn’t matter that he had been a ’Shadow. She did it. She took his life from him, the man who raised her. The fact that she was even capable…
She buried her face in Jordan’s chest. She didn’t want him to see how upset she was. He would think her stupid, wouldn’t he?
She felt his voice rumble into her hair. “Have faith in yourself, Alyx. I do. I know you. Whatever you fear now, whatever it is you worry about, when it comes down to the wire you will find the strength to do what needs to be done.”
“That’s what I’m scared about.”
Jordan gripped her solidly. She felt the air rush around them. It was only when she felt the ground shift under her feet to become more springy that she pulled her head back to look around.
Jordan had shifted the DreamScape. They were no longer at Urielos. They were standing on a cliff, the grassy plain stretching back to the horizon. Here there were no buildings, no trees, no ’Shadows around them. The windless sea rolling out from the base of the cliff reflected a perfectly round moon. The air up here smelled like salt.
Jordan cleared his throat, seeming uncomfortable. “You can see the stars better now.”
Alyx was so confused she almost forgot to be upset. “Stars?”
“I thought that they may make you feel better. To look at them,” he clarified. “They always make me feel better.”
“Oh.” Alyx didn’t move.
Jordan shuffled. “You could focus on the good news.”
“There’s good news?”
“You won.”
Alyx lifted up one of the corners of her lips. “Oh, yeah. I knew I would.”
Jordan let out a soft laugh. “That’s my girl.” Jordan moved his hand across the air. Then, lifting an eyebrow at her, he said, “It’ll be more comfortable if we lie down.”
Alyx looked behind them. Jordan had made a blanket appear across the ground. She nodded and she lay back on the thick, soft material.
Jordan lay down next to her. Close to her. Alyx became aware that the length of their upper arms were almost touching. It caused a warm flush to travel along her limbs. She turned her head to the stars before the flush could rise to her cheeks and betray her. She felt his index finger curl around hers. She let hers link back around his. A little buzzing feeling sat in the base of her stomach.
“Hey, check this out,” Jordan said, nudging his chin to the sky. Suddenly a few shooting stars began to light up the night sky. Then more and a few more. Until the sky showered with streaks of light.
Alyx smiled, then nudged him with her elbow. “Show off.”
He looked over at her and just grinned. They watched the sky in silence as the last of the shooting stars faded.
“They really are beautiful,” she said. “I never used to notice them when I was a warrior.”
“Do you want to know more about them?” There was an eagerness to his voice.
She nodded, curious as to what he would reveal. Keeping his finger curled around hers, the only part of their bodies touching, he leaned his head in close to hers. He raised his other arm and pointed with his outstretched finger. From the tip of his finger flew a small blue spark that whizzed through the air, playful like a dragonfly. It flew into the sky and began tracing around the stars as he spoke.
“See the row of three bright stars there? That’s Orion’s belt. Orion is also known as the Archer. If you follow the stars around it, you can make out Orion’s legs, head, and arms holding a bow and arrow.”
Alyx frowned. She could see the line of three brighter stars, but the rest of it… It just looked like a bunch of shiny dots to her. “You must have a better imagination than me.”
“I’m not making it up. It’s a proper constellation.”
“Wait, so these stars in this DreamScape…they’re not just random points of light?”
Jordan laughed softly and lowered his hand. The blue fairy light disappeared. “No. What you’re looking at is what the night sky actually looks like.”
“Wow. You must really like the stars.”
Jordan made a small humming noise as if in agreement. “I’ve studied them a bit. I like to look at them when I’m a little down on something. It’s just so vast out there. It helps me to put my problems into perspective. It makes me feel like I’m just a part of something bigger.”
Alyx stared in amazement at Jordan’s profile, noting his cheek and chin dusted with golden stubble, and his messy hair falling in a flaxen puddle around his head. This was the second time in a matter of hours that he had admitted to being less than perfect.
He noticed her staring and gave her a sheepish look in return. “What?”
“You’re actually admitting that you have feelings?”
“I get sad about things.”
Alyx shook her head.
When he spoke again his voice was quiet. “I thought you wanted me to be less… What were your exact words? Oh yes…‘untouchable’.”
Alyx blinked back her surprise. “You…you actually listened to me?”
“It’s hard to not listen when someone is pointing out your flaws.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“You didn’t offend me. Actually I lie. At first you did. No one has dared to point out any flaws of mine in a while. It made it easy to believe that I didn’t have any.” He laughed. “Then I realized that you were right. I realized that this would have to change if I wanted…if I wanted...” He paused for a moment, pursing his lips slightly. Finally, he said, “I don’t want to be ‘untouchable’ to you.”
Alyx found herself watching him with a quiet sense of awe. He had taken something she had said to him to heart and was trying to be a better person for it. She frowned. When had she last taken criticism like that? Symon had always said that she had a short temper, was prone to outbursts and that she lived with her emotions running just under the surface, the surface being a thin layer that was prone to crack.
She had believed that what was important to improve was her fighting skills, her skills as a warrior, her ability to kill, to fight, to protect. Her skills with a sword, with her fists, with her knives, but…to improve her character?
“We should go back,” Jordan said suddenly. “We should get some rest before we leave.”
Before Alyx could reply, the DreamScape went white.
* * *
After Alyx woke from the DreamScape, Jordan was already leaving the compartment that Mason had let them use to DreamScape in private. “You rest here,” he said over his shoulder. “I’ll come wake you before we have to leave.”
Alyx didn’t think she could sleep. But she must have been more tired than she thought, for as soon as her head hit the pillow she fell into a dreamless slumber.
Alyx jolted up when she heard her name being called. It was Jordan, slipping back into her compartment. She pushed herself to sitting and rubbed her eyes. How long had she slept?
“I spoke to Tobias while you were resting,” he said as he sat on the edge of the bed down near her feet. “I asked him about whether he could infuse our blades with my DreamWalker like he did with the Fire sword. He was able to do it, no problem. If we encounter any guards, we won’t have to kill them.”
He pulled out a sword and several daggers and knives from his belt, which Alyx recognized as her own, and lay them on the bedspread across her lap.
“I hope you don’t mind. I took the liberty of borrowing your weapons while you were asleep so that Tobias could infuse them with DreamWalker. Now you don’t have to worry about hurting any of them.” The meaning in them was apparent: her friends or Symon.
Alyx stared at her weapons. She watched the light now dancing off the blades with a blue shimmer. DreamWalker magic. His magic. He had done this for her. When she looked up, Jordan was looking at her with a kind of hopefulness in his eyes, as if he were asking if he did the right thing.
This was the sweetest, most thoughtful thing anyone had ever done for her. She was suddenly overwhelmed with the desire to close the space between them and press her face into his neck. But this overwhelming urge brought with it a nervousness and a shyness. So she remained where she was and swallowed back the ball in her throat. “It’s perfect. Thank you so much.”
A smile broke across his face.
“Did Tobias say how many hits the magic would last for?”
He shrugged. “We didn’t get a chance to test it out, but I believe it would be like any DreamWalker magic. It depends on how hard the warrior fights back. I have something else for you,” he said, jumping up. “Wait here.”
He stepped outside briefly. While he was outside, Alyx slipped out of bed and moved quickly to look at herself in the full-length mirror on the inside of the skinny cupboard door. She grimaced at her just-woke-up state. She wiped sleep from her eyes and hurriedly tried to tame her bed-hair down.
“I think you look cute all messed up.”
She spun, flushing slightly at the fact that she just got caught mid-vanity. Jordan had managed to re-enter the compartment without making any noise.
He held a pale blue box in one hand, which he held out to her. “It’s for you.”
“For me?” Alyx took the box from him. It was light, wide and long. She raised an eyebrow at Jordan.
“Go on. Open it.” His voice betrayed his impatience.
She placed the box on the bed and lifted off the lid. And her mouth dropped open.
“I know you have a costume already,” he said, “but I saw it and thought of you. There probably aren't very many occasions that I’d ever get to see you in a dress like this, so…”
Lying in among silver tissue was a black silk gown. Lying on top of the gown was a masquerade mask in matching black silk with curling gold lace patterns. Alyx pulled the mask out to study it closer, her finger brushing against the soft material. Placing it aside she reached for the gown and pulled it from its box. The long skirt cascaded to the floor in a shimmer of black liquid.
“Do you like it?” If she didn’t know any better, she would say that he sounded almost unsure.
“I love it. How did you get such a beautiful thing?”
She glanced over to him and caught him grinning sheepishly. “I’d rather not say.”
Alyx turned back to the gown, brushing the silk with her thumbs. “Oh, Jordan, it’s stunning,” she breathed.
She looked up to meet his gaze and a warm flush caressed the skin on her chest and neck. Then a small thread of what felt like guilt weaved through her stomach. She frowned down at the dress she held in her hands. Why would she have any reason to feel gui
lty?
“Put it on for me? Please?” Jordan said. “I promise I won’t peek.”
After he turned around, Alyx slipped out of her clothes. As she picked up the gown from the bed, she caught sight of Jordan’s back in the mirror, wide and solid with muscle under his crisp white shirt. His back muscles seemed to tense, as if he could sense that she was standing there watching him wearing only her simple black boy-leg briefs. She couldn’t help the flush that rose through her when she realized that just two steps – just two steps and she could have her hands and her bare chest pressed up against his back.
Snap out of it, she scolded herself as another odd sensation of guilt pulsed in her stomach. Jordan is a friend. This was not the time to be having these thoughts.
She pulled the gown over her head. The skirt flooded over her like liquid, her skin tingling where the silk brushed her like soft caresses. She fixed the fitted torso-section until it sat the way it was designed to.
“I’m ready,” she said and she turned to the mirror. She couldn’t help the gasp that escaped her.
The dress had fitted sleeves to her elbow to cover her warrior marks. It was cut low and square across the breasts with straps of material crossing her shoulders and neck and slits of material cut out across the torso, giving her the impression that she had been bound into the dress. The black material matched her dark hair and made her eyes seem like two emeralds set into an ivory statue. The effect was stunning and caused a small knot in her throat to form. Was this really her?
She had worn a dress before. A green thing that she had purchased from a Michaelea store. She had bought it at the storekeeper’s word. Truthfully, she had never felt comfortable in that dress. But this…this dress held her like a glove and the splits in the long skirt that she had only just noticed allowed her to move as freely as she did in her warrior blacks while concealing her weapons underneath.
