Eleanor tried moving her lips, and the moment she did, she could feel who ever it was holding her hand, squeezing her hand tighter.
“Do you need something?” the far off voice asked, but she could feel breath on her face, so she knew who ever said the words was leaning over her.
She tried harder, and managed to cause a low rattle to come from her throat.
“Don’t try and talk if it hurts,” the soothing voice whispered.
“Who…who…” She was having a hard time getting the words out, and she tried harder to open her eyes.
Sebastian watched her eyelids flutter and then slowly open, but no sooner had she opened her eyes, than she closed them again.
“Do you want me to call your aunt?” Sebastian asked anxiously.
She slowly shook her head. She wanted to see who it was sitting by her bed. His voice sounded so soothing and caring, but she had never heard the voice before, even though for some reason it seemed vaguely familiar to her somehow.
“Who…who…are…” she tried again, but it hurt so much to talk, she couldn’t seem to get the words out.
“You want to know who I am?” Sebastian asked, not wanting her to strain herself speaking.
She nodded, and tried to open her eyes again.
“I’m Sebastian Brentwood. I saw you jump from my ship, and try to swim to shore. I came in after you. You almost drowned, you know.”
“You...you…” the sound was a squeak.
“Don’t talk, if it hurts too much. There is plenty of time to learn everything. I am staying here in your uncle and aunt’s house. I have been helping out by sitting up with you. You just rest. When you get better, we can talk.”
“No…no…I…” she started to toss her head back and forth slowly, as she tried harder to open her eyes.
“Shhh. It is all right. Don’t upset yourself. Just rest for now. I will be right here, and when you finally feel good enough to talk, I will tell you what ever you want to know.”
Sebastian could feel Eleanor squeezing his hand, as she continued to make an effort to open her eyes, and then slowly, he saw them open. Her dark eyes trying to focus, and then lighting upon his face. The deep green of his questioning eyes, burned into her dark orbs, as a lock of his dark hair fell over his forehead.
“It…it…is…you,” she barely breathed.
“Don’t talk. I can tell it hurts you to speak,” he said, placing his finger over her mouth. “For now, just know that you are safe. No one is going to force you to marry me. I am only here because I am concerned about you. After all you somehow got caught on my ship, and almost drowned because of it. When you feel better, you can tell me about it, but for now there is no need for you to worry about anything. You have Brambles, and everyone is concerned about you. Even Sir Percy has come by to look in on you. If you want me to send for him….”
Eleanor’s eyes widened, and she grasped the arm that was holding her hand with her other hand, and began shaking her head back and forth.
Sebastian was caught by surprise. If she had agreed to marry the man, why did his suggestion of sending for Percy, cause her such alarm?
“If you don’t want to see him, then I won’t allow him to come here any longer. I will tell your uncle not to allow him in the house,” he promised anxiously, and noted that she started to relax, but she did not remove her hand from his arm, as she lay her head back against the pillows again and closed her eyes. “Is there anything you want me to do for you?” he asked, after a moment, once he saw her relaxing again.
“Yes,” she whispered, after such a long silence, he thought she had fallen asleep. “Please …please go away and leave me alone,” she strained slowly.
The very request pierced Sebastian’s heart. She did not trust him. She was afraid of him, in spite of the fact she was still clinging to his hand and arm. “I am not going to hurt you,” he said quietly. “I only want the best for you. I am here to help you,” he insisted.
“I….don’t want your help,” she breathed, and yet she did not let go of his hand. In fact she was clinging to it all the tighter.
“Try and sleep,” he said. She must not know what she was saying, he decided, because now she whispered. “Don’t leave me. Don’t leave me alone.”
“I won’t,” he promised, though he did not know if she was actually talking to him, or whether she was drifting off into a dream.
Eleanor clung to the hand of the man sitting next to her bed. He said he was Sebastian Brentwood, the man her uncle wanted her to marry. He was the man who saved her from drowning, and the feel of him holding her hand gave her strength, yet at the same time, she was afraid of that strength. She was afraid of allowing him to help her.
As soon as she got better, she would leave. She would find a position in some house, and put everything behind her. She could never marry Sebastian, not after allowing Percy to…Percy had come. Why had Percy come, he was supposed to be marrying Glenda? This confused her all the more. She felt comforted by the man holding her hand, but she knew he would never want to marry her, once he discovered she had given herself to another man. And then Ned had used her as well. He must have, since she woke up with no clothes on. She was a doubly ruined woman. No man would want her now, not even Percy, who never wanted her in the first place. She felt tears running down the side of her face.
“Are you in pain?” Sebastian asked, as he leaned towards her. “Do you want me to call someone?”
“No…” the sound was barely audible.
“Why are you crying?” he whispered.
“I can’t tell you,” she groaned and more tears joined the others, and her body started to shake.
“Don’t cry, darling,” he coaxed, as he shifted his position and sat on the side of the bed, pulling her into his arms. “You will be fine. If you are crying because you are afraid of me, forget about it. I would never do anything you did not wish me to do. I am here to protect you, not hurt you.”
“Don’t call me darning,” she sobbed into his shoulder. “I am nobody’s darling, and never will be.”
“You will soon become my darling,” he told her, stubbornly. “Your uncle has accepted my offer for you, but I will give you time to think about it first.”
“No…I can’t be. I won’t be. I will never marry you.” Yet as she spoke, she clung to his neck, as though she would never release him.
“Then don’t worry about it,” he soothed, wondering at the contradiction of her words and actions. “I am not going to make you marry me. I would not want a reluctant wife. What ever wife I end up with, must come willingly. The decision will be completely up to you.”
Hearing him say that brought on a whole new bout of tears, and Sebastian was miffed by her sudden outburst, but only held her tighter, as he stroked her silky black waves. When she was feeling better, they could talk more reasonably, he decided. Until then he would treat her like a loving brother, and try not to alarm her.
Eleanor felt safe in Sebastian’s arms, but she knew it was only a temporary situation. He wanted to help her because she had almost drowned. He was trying to comfort her. He thought that she would eventually consent to marry him. But soon all of that would change. For now though, she would allow him to comfort her. She was too tired and in too much pain, to do otherwise.
In the comfort of Sebastian’s arms, she finally fell asleep, and he reluctantly released her and lay her back against the pillows. She belonged in his arms, he decided. Somehow he had to make her realize that they belonged together. Once she discovered that he was not going to force her hand, she would understand how much he respected her, and truly wanted to make her his wife. The thought of Annie was fast fading into oblivion, as his heart began to swell at the thought of making Eleanor his wife. It was just a matter of time, he thought. And he had plenty of time, he decided.
***********************
“She told me she doesn’t want to see you,” Sebastian stated, as Sir Percy thrust his head forward and glared at Sebastian.
“She will have to tell me to my face,” Percy insisted. Teddy tells me she is much better, and can actually talk without too much pain. I have waited patiently, because I knew how bad she was, but I don’t have much time. I am due in London in a few weeks, and Eleanor and I have things to discuss before I leave.”
“I will not allow you to upset her,” Sebastian growled.
“She is not your property,” Percy insisted. “If she refuses to see me, after I have had a chance to talk to her, then I will have to accept that, but until then… Ah, there you are Teddy. Will you please tell this bully to allow me to speak to Eleanor?”
Teddy studied the two, as Sebastian stood before Eleanor’s door with his arms folded across his chest, in a solid stance, that did not look like it would be easy to alter.
“I tell you what,” Teddy, said evenly. “I will talk to Eleanor and see what she really wants. I am not going to have the two of you at loggerheads and cause Eleanor to get upset all the more. She can probably hear you out here.” He smiled politely at both men, and then entered Eleanor’s room.
Nelly was sitting and reading to Eleanor, when Teddy strolled in, closing the door behind him. “How are you feeling this morning,” he asked Eleanor, as he sat down on the edge of her bed. “Do you feel like having company?” he quarried.
“Depends on who it is,” Eleanor smiled, and then gave a cough.
“It is Sir Percy, and he has been here every day to see you, yet Sebastian refuses to allow him to enter. What have you told Sebastian about Percy, to make him hold the man off like that?”
“I don’t want to see Percy,” Eleanor insisted.
“Well there are some things you should know before you make that decision,” Teddy insisted. “Let me talk to Eleanor alone,” Teddy turned to his sister, and Nelly rose up from the chair and went to the door.
“If you insist,” she said quietly, even though she wished she could remain to discover what Teddy had to say.
Eleanor was so much closer to Teddy then she was with her, and it caused a twinge of envy to pass through Nelly as she went out in the hall where Sebastian and Percy were staring each other down.
Teddy took Eleanor’s hand in his. “Listen, I think you should know, that you most likely jumped to conclusions about Percy,” Teddy began. “The reason he left, was in order to break it off with Glenda, so he could fulfill his offer to you. But he was so deeply in debt, he had to convince his uncle to pay off his creditors, first, before he could officially offer for you.”
“He knew that he was promised to Glenda when he asked me. What kind of loyalty is that?” Eleanor fumed.
“But he did not love Glenda. It was a marriage in order to resolve his debts.”
“Yes, and the fact that he would contemplate marrying anyone for such selfish reasons, is one other reason why I would never accept him now,” she stated.
“At least talk to him, and tell him that, if that is the way you feel,” Teddy prodded.
Eleanor, let out a slow sigh. She really didn’t want to see Percy, because it would bring back too many memories, that were paining her now. He had compromised her, while intending to marry someone else, and that was a double blow to her outrage. Not only had he ruined her for any other man, but he had done it through deception, making her believe that he loved her, and he was free to marry her.
“Very well, if it will keep him from camping outside my door, you can let him in,” Eleanor gave in.
Teddy patted her hand. “He really does love you, Eleanor. He has given up a lot in order to put himself in a position to offer for you.”
“He should have thought of that, before he said he would offer for me,” Eleanor said stubbornly.
“Just hear him out,” Teddy admonished.
“Send him in, then,” Eleanor, muttered, steeling herself for the audience.
Teddy left the room, and Sir Percy put his head in the door, gazing at Eleanor, before finally coming all the way into the room.
“You are as ravishing as ever,” Percy said, coming to the side of the bed and then sitting in the chair Nelly had vacated.
“Why are you here, Percy? Sebastian told you I did not want to see you,” Eleanor said flatly.
“You must hear me out, first,” Percy insisted, as he took Eleanor’s hand in his. “I loved you from the moment you kissed me in the garden, but my life had already spun out of control. I was in debt so deeply, and no way out, except to marry an heirs, which you weren’t. I had lowered myself to choosing to marry for money, but when I came to call on you, I realized what a huge mistake that had been. I could not leave you dangling, seeing as how your uncle was setting you up with Sebastian, so I committed myself to you, and made haste to undo what I had so unthinkingly done. Then I had to convince my uncle to advance me a portion of my inheritance to pay off my debts, but in return he requested me to head his factory in London. I was willing to become part of the working class to marry you, Eleanor. But once I inherit, you will live like a queen.”
Eleanor looked at Percy sadly. “The fact that you were so deep in debt, makes me believe that you do not know how to handle money. Once you inherit, you could squander away your money in the same manner,” Eleanor, stated. “But that is not what has turned me from you. You took advantage of me, while you were betrothed to someone else. Had you not been able to rearrange everything in order to offer for me, I would be ruined for any other man to marry me. I am ruined for any other man to marry me. That alone has changed my opinion of you. I cannot marry you now.”
“But you have been compromised. Therefore you must marry me, seeing as how you are ruined for anyone else,” Percy insisted. “What if you have conceived?”
“It doesn’t matter. I can’t trust you now. What would stop you from turning to someone else, if things presented themselves in order to cause you to make other choices over me? For all I know you would gladly take a mistress on the side. You pledged yourself to a childhood friend, and then threw her over for a nameless penniless nobody. We would end up hating each other in the end, Percy,” Eleanor sighed, bowing her head. “I can’t marry you, Percy, and on top of that, I won’t marry you.” She gave him a stony look. “And if I have conceived, I shall send Teddy out to challenge you to a duel, and I assure you, he is an excellent shot!”
“But what will you do? Does Sebastian know about us?”
“No, and he will never know. I don’t intend to marry him either. I will not hold you accountable for what you did, but I will not marry you because of it. Put your life back in order, so you will be fit for the next woman you think you have fallen in love with,” Eleanor said sadly.
“I will never love anyone but you,” Percy insisted.
“At least you are able to marry someone else. A choice that has been taken from me,” Eleanor pointed out. “Be grateful for small blessings,” she murmured. “Now please leave.”
Percy looked longingly at her. “I won’t give up, in case you change your mind,” he insisted. “If later you come to your senses, I will be in London. My cousin, Brenda, can tell you where to find me if you ever need me.”
“I won’t need you, but thank you for the offer,” Eleanor said evenly.
“This isn’t the end,” Percy insisted, as he rose from the chair, and slowly walked towards the door. “I will always love you, Eleanor. If you conceive you will have to marry me. I will admit to being the father, if that happens!”
Eleanor, turned her head away. “Never,” she hissed, becoming alarmed at the very thought, that she could have conceived. Her life was slowly falling to pieces, and when she finally recovered, she would have to strike out on her own. She would go as far away as… She heard the door close, but she knew she was not alone in the room. She turned her head and saw Sebastian standing there. He was someone else she would have to deal with, but that could wait, she thought. She liked having him there to comfort her, but when the time came… She did not want to think about it.
“Percy did not look ve
ry happy,” Sebastian said in a low voice. “I take it you will not be marrying him, as he believed you would be.” He sat down in the chair and studied her face.
“He never officially offered for me. He only indicated he would. His underhandedness has put me off.”
“So you believe in honesty?”
Eleanor hesitated, then stuck her chin out. “Yes,” she stated.
“Good. In that case I would like you to tell me about what you were doing on my ship the day you jumped overboard with no clothes on.”
Eleanor drew in her breath. “I cannot tell you that,” she stated emphatically.
“And why can’t you tell me that? You were in my cabin on my ship, and you refuse to tell me how you got there?”
“Certainly, I can tell you how I got there. I walked into your cabin. That is how I got there.”
“Willingly? Someone must have gotten the key. Don’t tell me that my captain allowed you to…”
“No he did not. But that is all I will tell you.” She folded her arms over her chest as she returned his glare.
“Why did you go on the ship in the first place? Did you know it belonged to me?”
“Yes. I knew it was your ship. I was curious. I had never been on a ship before and…” she closed her mouth.
“So you were just wanting to look around. Someone took you into my cabin, willingly, you say, and then you end up crawling out of my window without any clothes on and jumping. That makes perfect sense,” he growled at her.
“I did not realize the ship had sailed, and I had very little time to find any clothes and…” She stopped, realizing that she would be telling him all, if she went any farther. His eyes were narrowing. He must believe that she willingly took her clothes off for whoever brought her into his cabin.
“And where were your clothes? And why had you taken them off?”
“That is none of your concern,” she hissed.
“I believe it is of my concern, seeing as how you were in my cabin at the time on my ship, and you knew I was the man who offered for you hand.”
Defiant Heart Page 11
