by Kristy Tate
Kirk trotted around the car and climbed behind the wheel. “Good thing you weren’t at my house today,” he said. “My mom baked a cheesecake.” He shook his head as he started the car. “I don’t know why she does that. Neither she nor my dad needs the calories.”
Charlie bit her lip. “But…don’t you like cheesecake?”
He shook his head as he pulled the car out of the parking lot and eased onto the crowded Jamboree Road. “I gave up dairy two years ago.”
“Oh. How come?”
“Dairy provides that lethal combination of fat and sweetness. And, as I’m sure you know, there's no evidence that dairy is good for your bones or prevents osteoporosis. It's full of saturated fat and is linked to heart disease.”
“Do you have heart disease in your family?”
“No, but recent scientific studies have advised dairy products may be linked to increased risk for prostate cancer, testicular cancer, and possibly ovarian and breast cancers. Especially prostate cancer.” He gave an exaggerated shiver. “I don’t want anything messing with my prostate.”
Charlie ran her hand over her neck, wondering if she should tell him she’d been responsible for the cheesecake. If she didn’t say something, there was always the possibility his dad would. “I have a confession,” she said. “I made the cheesecake as a thank-you for your help with Ian.”
He blanched. “Geez, I’m sorry. I really stuck my foot in it.”
“No worries. Just next time I want to thank you, I won’t use dairy products.”
A small frown wrinkled his forehead. “Do you eat dairy?”
“Sure. I mean, there are just as many reported health benefits…” She let her voice trail away as his small frown grew. He didn’t like being contradicted. “Well, hopefully, your parents, or someone else, will enjoy it.”
“I was going to suggest to Mom that she give it to Leticia.”
So, it’s okay to give the cleaning lady cancer…
She really had to learn to quiet that snarky inner voice. Why did it only show up when Kirk was around? Feeling unsettled, she directed the conversation to the hospital. Work. That was something they could both talk about and agree on.
Only they couldn’t.
When Kirk started bashing Zoe, a nurse Charlie respected and loved, she lost it. “Physicians come with a full picture of the patient that they’ve known over months to years. We nurses come in and get a snapshot of the patient. All we have is what we can see and monitor at that moment and what the nurse on the previous shift discloses.”
“That’s no excuse,” Kirk retorted. “When I give an order, I expect it to be followed. When a nurse says, ‘let me look into that,’ all she’s really saying is that she doesn’t trust my judgment.”
This reminded her of the you’re a nurse and I’m a doctor conversation they’d had earlier. Charlie bit at the edge of her fingernail, wondering what she could safely talk about. Then she remembered how much she’d paid to have her nails done and she folded her hands in her lap.
Kirk started talking about the changes in the healthcare system. She watched him as his words became increasingly heated and remembered that Mr. Palmer liked to watch Fox News. Would Kirk someday be like his dad? Probably. Not that that was a bad thing. She liked Mr. Palmer. He was a nice man. Zealously patriotic. Ultra conservative. Appreciative of cheesecakes. And kind.
Her phone buzzed with an incoming text. She dug it out of her purse and sucked in a deep breath when she got the message.
“What is it?” Kirk asked.
“It’s Lincoln, one of the kids on my floor. He’s had a seizure.”
“Who texted you? Zoe?” Kirk’s voice held disdain. “Speak of the devil.”
“Well, yes, but she’s just the bearer of bad news…”
“Our lives as medical professionals will always be full of bad news. You know that, right? We can’t get too attached to our patients.”
“Kirk, I want to go to the hospital and see Lincoln.”
“Charlie,” he mimicked her tone, “that’s not a good idea. You can’t run to the hospital every time a patient has an episode.”
“Maybe not every time, but I can this time.”
He shook his head, but a small smile played on his lips. “I love that you’re so compassionate, but I’m telling you, it’s not healthy. You can’t let yourself become embroiled in your patient’s drama—because there will always be drama. You have to be above the fray. You must distance yourself from them.”
“I can’t do that. I don’t want to do that.”
“You have to. To be a good nurse, you have to learn to be objective.”
“I don’t want to be objective.”
Kirk glanced at his watch. “I’ll take you to the hospital, but not now. This evening is important and I really need to speak with Kent Ruble. You know how important the funding for the new unit is. We can go to the hospital after the dinner.”
“But I don’t think Zoe would have texted me if—”
“Lincoln will still be there.”
But she knew he couldn’t promise her that. None of the children on her floor had any sort of guaranteed tomorrow. But then, no one did.
#
Zach watched the door of the Harbor Yacht Club, waiting for Charlie and Kirk to arrive. Ricardo swirled the drink in his glass and lounged in a chair beside him.
Laguna Beach, despite its proximity to Los Angeles, was still a small city. Those who frequented charitable events inevitably rubbed shoulders. The middle-aged men with their hair plugs, the women with their injected lips and cheeks. Charlie didn’t fit in and it made Zach ache to think of her trying. She belonged in a park chasing children or on a beach building sandcastles. Sure, she was a good nurse, but she’d make a better mother, or a teacher, or maybe a journalist.
The band members Zach had spotted drinking behind their van moments ago arrived on stage and picked up their instruments. The men burst into a rousing rendition of “Lucid Dreams.”
He scanned the room for Charlie. A few dancers swayed to the music beneath a glittering disco ball. The caterers clad in black weaved through the crowd with trays loaded with drinks or appetizers. Jewelry sparkled on the female guests while the men in their suits looked like penguins.
“Are you going to tell her you have your memory back?” Ricardo asked.
“Probably,” Zach said. “I mean, why wouldn’t I?”
“When are you going to talk to Eva?”
“It’s already done.”
“Yeah? How’d it go?” Ricardo sipped his drink.
“She seemed happy and relieved, but she asked me to keep our split quiet for a while.”
“What for?”
“Her dying mom loves me and Eva doesn’t want to upset her.”
“Are you going to visit her mom?”
Zach shook his head. “She’s in Brazil. But I’m going to visit my mom, remember?”
“That’s right.” Ricardo put down his drink. “What did Clive say?”
“Thank you.”
“You’re a big man,” Ricardo said. “And I’m not just talking about your size.”
“Eva’s great, but she’s right to leave. Our relationship fizzled a long time ago. I was just holding on because I didn’t want to be like my dad.” He looked around and lowered his voice. “I’m worried, though.”
“What about?”
“What if I am like my dad?” Zach drummed his fingers on his knee. “My dad was married five times. I don’t want to do that. I don’t want to work that hard. I just want to find one woman to love and cherish and grow old with her.”
Ricardo slapped him on the arm. “Then that’s what you’ll do.”
“How can you be sure? Maybe monogamy isn’t realistic.”
“It can be, if you want it to be,” Ricardo promised him.
“Maybe for some—” he began.
Ricardo looked him in the eye. “When have you not gotten what you want?”
“Lots and lots of ti
mes.”
Ricardo shook his head. “When something is in your power and within your grasp—you make it happen. If you want to be with one woman for a lifetime, you can make it happen.” He smirked. “But no one’s promising how long a lifetime is…”
“She’s here.” Zach stood up. Charlie looked gorgeous, even if she did have that odious doctor attached to her hip. He recognized the dress and shoes from her cousin’s shop. Did she mind that her clothes, as stunning as they were, were at least fifty years old? If she were his wife, she could wear whatever she wanted.
Wait, where had that come from? He barely knew her. And yet, visions of her were the last thing he saw when he went to bed for the night and the first thing he thought about when he woke in the morning. He pushed his fingers through his hair, wondering how he could tell her how he felt…wondering what she saw in Kirk Palmer.
Zach caught her eye. She started when she saw him, before relaxing into a smile and waving. Longing curled through him and his breath grew increasingly shallow. Weaving through the crowd, he was soon at her side. Her perfume wafted around him, drawing him closer.
Kirk tightened his hold on Charlie’s arm. “Walden,” Kirk said with a nod.
“Palmer,” Zach returned. “How are you?”
“We’re good,” Kirk said, glancing around. “But what are you doing here?”
“It’s a fundraiser. I made a donation,” Zach told him.
“Oh.” Palmer seemed caught off guard by this news. “That’s nice of you.”
Zach held out his hand to Charlie. “Would you like to dance?”
“Do you mind?” Charlie asked Kirk.
His expression said yes, but his voice said, “No, of course not.”
Zach led Charlie onto the dance floor and took her into his arms, loving the way she fit against him as if she were the missing puzzle piece in his life. She was warm and sexy, and their physical contact shot tingles through his blood.
“Are you having fun?” he asked.
A shadow passed over her face, but she answered, “Of course.” And she tried to lighten her tone. “I mean, who wouldn’t be? This is all so fabulous.”
Did the glitz really interest her that much? Something was off. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
She cocked her head so she could meet his gaze. “How could you tell something was wrong?”
“Normally, you’re bubbly. Tonight, you seem sad.”
She told him about Lincoln.
“Do you want to go?”
“You mean now?”
“Of course.”
“You’d just leave?”
“With you? For Lincoln? Absolutely.”
“Okay, let me tell Kirk.” She paused and went still, no longer moving to the music. “No,” she said, her voice hard. “Let’s just go.” She glanced over at Kirk. He stood in a cluster of men. Zach recognized a few of them as Orange County’s most prominent businessmen. “If I’m back before the dinner, he won’t miss me.”
#
“How are you?” Charlie asked as they waited for the valet to return with Zach’s car. She shivered in the cold and Zach took off his jacket and draped it over her shoulders. Immediately, she felt warmed and comforted.
“I’m good,” he said.
“And your memories?”
He smiled as his Tesla arrived. “They come and go.”
The valet jumped out of the car and handed Zach the keys before running around to the passenger side to open the door for Charlie.
“So, they’re back?” she asked as she settled into the Tesla and clipped on the seatbelt.
He seemed to be considering how much to share. “Let’s not talk about me,” he said. “Tell me about Lincoln. What’s going on with him?”
“You remember him?”
“Of course. Cute little kid.”
“He has encephalitis, which is swelling or inflammation in the brain.”
“Ah, I’m familiar with brain disorders,” he said as he pulled the car onto the crowded Pacific Coast Highway.
“Then you understand how little we really know about the brain.” She filled him in on Lincoln’s unusual case, and his family’s stay in Haiti, a country where mosquitoes might have transmitted the virus that may have caused the disease.
“There’re a lot of mights and may haves in this discussion,” Zach said.
“That’s healthcare for you. So much of it is a guessing game.” Charlie bit her lip and looked out the window.
Zach reached over and squeezed her hand. “I’ll drop you off at the curb and then park.”
She nodded and blinked back tears.
#
As soon as Zach spotted Charlie huddled in the corner of a sofa with her face in her hands, he knew that no matter how cheery the décor on the fourth floor, she would be inconsolable.
He shot Zoe a quick glance and she responded by frowning at him and shaking her head. A small crowd had gathered at the end of the hall. A devastated woman wailed.
Charlie’s shoulders shook with silent sobs. He dropped down beside her and gathered her into his arms. “Aw, my sweet girl, I’m so sorry.”
Charlie sagged against his chest and glanced up at him through teary eyelashes. “Can you take me home?” she whispered.
“If that’s what you want,” he said, dropping a kiss on the top of her head.
She nodded.
He took her elbow and steadied her on her high heels. She looked overdressed and out of place in the hospital—it struck him that she didn’t belong there any more than he did. He guided her to the elevator. He held her close, rubbing her back, trying to comfort her.
Outside, the cool night air hit them like a splash of cold water, and Charlie started shivering. He took off his suit jacket and wrapped it around her before opening the door of the Tesla and settling her inside.
Zach turned on the heater as soon as he started the engine. He wanted to ask what had happened, but he didn’t want to further upset her, so he kept his questions to himself while Charlie softly cried.
“I’m sorry,” she mumbled. “If you want to go back…oh! Oh no!”
He stomped on the brake and the car screeched to a stop. “What is it?” he asked.
“Your shirt! It has mascara stains on it!”
He chuckled with relief. “I so do not care.” And he pointed the car toward her apartment in Irvine.
“But how will you go back to the fundraiser with makeup smeared on your shirt?”
“I won’t go back.”
“Oh dear. This is all my fault.”
He leveled a glance at her. “Charlie, how can any of this be your fault?”
“I don’t want to be the reason you miss the fundraiser!”
Zach eased the car onto the busy highway. “I only went because I wanted to see you.”
“Oh.”
He pulled up to a stoplight. “If you’re not there, I don’t want to be there either.” This probably wasn’t the best time to have this conversation, but it had been building up inside him for days.
“You’re sweet,” she said.
“Sweet on you,” he replied.
“Really?”
He nodded. “I know you think you’re in love with Kirk Palmer.”
“I’m not so sure, you know, about Kirk.” She bit her lip and looked out the window. “It’s possible that I didn’t love him as much as I loved the idea of him.”
“I’m not sure what that means,” he said.
“Then that makes two of us,” she said.
Hope tingled through him. “When we get to your house, can I kiss you? Or are you too sad?”
“I think I would like a kiss, or two,” she said with a small smile. “Maybe three would be the right number.”
“Why limit them?”
“Hmm, good question. Do you think they’ll be as amazing as the ones in my dreams?”
“Probably better because this time we’ll both be awake.”
“We’ll have to experiment,” she
said.
“It might take a long time.” His thoughts skittered to Palmer and he wondered if she was also thinking about him. He was, after all, her supposed date for the evening. What had happened to cool her infatuation with him? “Are you sure?” he asked as he pulled into the parking lot of her complex.
She nodded.
“It’s been a hard day for you,” he said.
She picked up his hand and laced her fingers through his. “Are you backing out?”
He parked the Tesla beside her Corolla, his thoughts, needs, and desires conflicted. She bounced from the car and hurried up the stairs. He followed. On her doorstep, she threw her arms around him and kissed him.
Hunger ripped through him. He kissed her lightly at first, but the intensity grew. He cradled her face in his hands, ran his thumb across her cheek and felt a tear. It jerked him back to reality. He pulled away, suddenly cold.
“Are you coming in?” she asked.
He shook his head.
“Why not?” She leaned against him. “Wasn’t this as good as my dreams?”
“Better,” he said in a strangled voice. “So much better.”
“Then why not come in?” she asked, looking as if she might start crying again.
He hesitated, then came to a decision. “I’ll come in. I’ll make you some popcorn and heat up some cocoa. We can watch any movie you choose and snuggle on the sofa. But the next time we kiss, it won’t be because you’re sad and because we both happen to be at the same place at the same time—it’ll be because being together is the only thing we want to do and kissing will make it just that much better.”
“When is that going to happen?” she asked.
“Whenever you say so.”
She started to say something and he stopped her by putting his finger on her lips. “But not tonight. It has to be prefaced with a dinner at a restaurant of your choice and a walk at sunset on the beach.”
“That sounds nice.”
“It will be so nice.”
“You said I get to choose the movie tonight. Did you really mean that?”
“Yes, but don’t make me regret it.”
She smiled and tugged him through the door. “Come on, I know just the movie that will cheer us up.”
“What is it?” Trepidation made him hesitate.
