by Logan Jacobs
Cotinus may have been the world’s stupidest name, but he would make a fine reward for ridding the world of an annoying pest.
The unmistakable sound of clinking armor cut across the cheering of the crowd, and when I turned around, I saw the army surging forward. Three of the men were already in striking range, and I managed to parry and dodge a few blows before they surrounded me.
“What are you doing?” I snapped at them. My sword was knocked out of my hands, and my shield was ripped off my left arm. “The terms of the fight were clear!”
The soldier on my right dropped his sword and held my arms to my sides. The one on my left ripped my helmet off my head before he knocked my knees out from underneath me. The third soldier kept his sword at the ready, and as the rest of the army came up behind him, he sneered down at me.
“Lucian may have agreed to the terms, but we did not,” the soldier said. “The moment he fell, I became the commander of this army.
“You dirty bastards,” I growled at the men. “I killed your bitch ass lord fair and square!”
“You did,” the new commander agreed. “And now you will pay for what you have done.”
Before I could get another comment in, the sword pierced my stomach.
Ahhhh, fuck.
Chime.
I glared at Lucian as he dismounted from his horse. He had to know that his men would avenge him once he was dead just as he knew Mahini would avenge my death. Agreeing to my terms was just a formality, and since I knew his men wouldn’t honor the agreement, was there really any point in this one on one duel?
Well, I had only managed to kill him the one time. I had to make sure I could kill him every time before I tried a different strategy.
The duel followed almost the exact same thread as the last, and once Lucian was on his back, I didn’t bother asking if he had any last words. I already knew what they would be, and I was so over listening to his annoying voice. I plunged the blade through his throat and didn’t wait for the gurgling to stop this time.
His men were already surging forward. The two who had grabbed me last time were halfway through the motion of sheathing their swords, but once they realized I was ready for them, they drew their blades again. They swung their swords at the same time as two spearmen thrust their spears at me.
I managed to dodge one of the spears, but the second spear sliced the inner part of my thigh. I hissed in pain as I brought my shield up to block the two swords, but there were soldiers everywhere. I couldn’t protect every side of myself when they circled me like that, and within seconds, I knew I was defeated.
Chime.
After killing Lucian this time, I spun around and rushed at the army that was only just beginning to bear down on me. Their expressions were hidden behind their helmets, but from their faltering movements, I knew I had surprised them. The frontrunners had their swords at the ready, but I managed to knock them to the ground with a sideswipe from my shield. I kicked one in his helmeted head and plunged my sword through the other’s exposed throat.
Three spearmen were thrusting at me by that point, and I was able to dodge all but one. The third skittered across my armor with a sharp sound, and I managed to break the shaft of the spear with a downward blow of my shield. The soldier didn’t flinch as the end exploded into splinters, and he swung the shaft at me like a baseball bat.
Two swordsmen came up from behind, and I whirled around to meet their attacks. One man used an overhead swing while the other used the shield bashing technique Lucian was so fond of. I blocked the sword with my shield and danced away from the bashing attempt, only to be met with searing pain as one of the spearmen sliced my inner thigh from behind. Another came in with a jab to my underarm, and my sword fell from limp fingers.
Chime.
It didn’t matter how I tried to fight off the soldiers once Lucian was dead. Even if I managed to kill a few, there were so many more to take their place. It was like trying to defeat a hydra but instead of heads that appeared, it was trained soldiers. I wasn’t even able to get to any of the crossbowmen because their comrades kept them properly defended. Ducking behind my shield to block the bolts that came whizzing toward me almost always led to my immediate death by a spear.
For over a dozen respawns I attempted every possible angle I could find. I went at the army head-on, and they surrounded me and killed me in a matter of moments. I darted and dodged around them and tried to lead them away from the town, but they wouldn’t play along with that tactic, and they tore down the makeshift gate and started slaughtering everyone. I even tried to get the townspeople to fight on my side once, but it took so long to move the gate that by the time anyone had reached me I was already wounded to the point of losing anyway.
There had to be a way to end this without having to involve the townspeople or Mahini. Killing Lucian in single combat clearly wasn’t it, so I had to try another tactic.
Chime.
“Then you and your town have chosen death,” Lucian growled when I told him he wasn’t getting Elissa.
“You would think that, but no,” I replied. “Your death is the only thing we want.”
“And how will you get it, I wonder?” the Loser Lord asked.
“Killing you isn’t the problem,” I assured him. “But your men have no honor and will fight to avenge you even if you die.”
“And what makes you say that?” Lucian’s gray eyes narrowed.
“I’ve run this scenario through my head a thousand times in the last few seconds,” I told him, and I smirked as the blood drained away from his face. “I can defeat you in single combat without a problem, but your men will rush forward and kill me, even if you agree that your death means my town is to be left in peace.”
Lucian’s horse pounded his front foot against the ground several times while the man thought about how to respond. He could try to deny my claims all he wanted, but I had literally just lived it several hundred times.
“If what you say is true,” he began, “then how do you propose we end this stalemate.”
“Well, you could just turn around and go home,” I joked. “But since your precious pride has been hurt, I know that’s not an option.”
“Look here, God of Time,” Lucian growled as he urged his horse closer to me. I hated how he looked down on me from the red animal’s back. “There are only two options that you have to look forward to. Both will lead to the demise of this pitiful town.”
“Oh, yeah?” I challenged him. “Then, please, do enlighten me.”
“The first is obvious,” the Loser Lord replied as he rolled his eyes. “You’ll stand your ground and fight all fifty-four men in my army. You probably have enough skill to kill about three of them, maybe more if you’re lucky, but they will overcome you in the end, and you will die. The survivors will go into Addington, retrieve my bride, and slaughter everyone else.”
“Yeah, that’s not what will happen,” I snickered. “So what’s behind door number two?”
There was a long pause where Lucian just glared at me for a while. He was probably trying to work out how I could be so confident in my ability to wipe out fifty-five men all by myself.
“The second option,” he began in a wary tone, “is that there is no battle here today. You are free to go back to your little town and continue your pitiful existence behind those easily-destroyed walls of yours. But that is where you and the rest of the townspeople will stay. You will not be allowed to leave for anything: food, water, resources. Anyone who tries to leave will be cut down where they stand. Until my woman is given back to me.”
“Yeah…” I rolled my yes. “No.”
“The choice is yours, Great One. I will even give you a few moments to consider the options.”
With that, he urged the horse back to the frontline of his army.
The horse.
That was the answer to everything. I didn’t know a lot about history, but I did know that mounted knights were able to plow through footmen easily.
I had to take it from Lucian, and then I had to use it to kill all these men.
There was no way I would allow the people of Addington to starve. This had to end today, even if it took me a million attempts. I already knew how to defeat Lucian in single combat, and I could probably get him to agree to another challenge and just save after I killed him. It wouldn’t be much of a window to ready myself, though, and I kind of wanted to see the look on his stupid face when I killed every last one of his men before I ran my sword through him.
“I’ve made my decision!” I called to Lucian. “If you want a battle, then you’ll get a battle!”
I made a quick save point, and then I rushed toward the line of men waiting to rip me to pieces.
Time to show them what a god could really do.
Chapter 14
Any sane person would have run the other direction and hid behind the gates of the town or at least called for some reinforcements, but I couldn’t let a single person in my town get caught up in this mess any more than they already were. This was my fight, and no matter how many times I had to race toward the angry army, I would eventually come out on top and kill every last man in my sight.
I couldn’t see every man in the army as I raced forward. Lucian and his massive horse took up most of my vision, and since the plains here were pretty flat, I didn’t have the advantage of height to get a proper count. All I had to go off of were Mahini’s observations, and knowing that there were fifty-five angry and very skilled men standing before me was enough to make my balls shrivel.
This was gonna take me a while.
I covered about four yards before Lucian made any kind of move, and he did what I would have expected a man on a horse to do. He kicked his mount and charged right for me with his sword at the ready. The spearmen behind him closed ranks, but they didn’t rush forward, as I’m sure they figured one man on foot wouldn’t last long against a man on horseback.
The red beast bored down on me, and before I made it another yard, he was there. I strafed to one side to avoid being run down, but Lucian seemed to have expected that tactic. His horse slid to a halt faster than I would have guessed it could, and it pulled some kind of ballet move by rearing up and pivoting in place.
The last thing I saw were two very large hooves coming down at my head.
Chime.
This was just another one of those times where I wished I had magic, since a giant fireball would have eliminated the problem before I could have snapped my fingers. No need for the time-consuming duel or getting charged by a massive horse. Just light them all on fire and watch them burn.
But Addington didn’t have a magic user, and the ones I had met I had already killed. I was on my own, with my sword, shield, and wits.
And unlimited attempts.
Lucian charged his horse at me, and when I strafed to the side, the beast pulled that fancy footwork again. I was expecting it this time, so I strafed back the way I came. The sound of those hooves coming down was like a bomb being dropped, and when the horse landed, the ground trembled around me.
That was the force that had just killed me, and I wanted it for myself.
Unseating Lucian was not going to be an easy feat. He was clearly a trained horseman, since he didn’t get thrown when his horse reared, and even leaning to one side to swing his sword at me didn’t seem to unbalance him in the slightest. My hands were full, too, so it wasn’t like I could just grab him and yank him down. I would have to give up my sword or my shield, and both were kind of keeping me alive at that point.
But I wouldn’t know if I could do it if I didn’t try. I parried a blow from his sword and dropped my shield. Before he could yank his sword arm back for another swing, I reached up and grabbed his wrist.
“What are you-- Let go of me!” Lucian snarled as he tried to tug his arm free.
“Get off your high horse and fight like a man!” I growled right back.
I had never been so close to a horse before, but I would have expected shouting and swordplay to be terrifying for a prey animal. This one was very well trained, and although it pranced around a bit with me yanking on his rider, the horse didn’t drag me or bolt in the opposite direction. That actually wouldn’t have been a bad thing, if it got Lucian out of the way for a bit.
I was too busy focusing on dragging Lucian from his horse that I wasn’t paying attention to the other men. We weren’t in the one-on-one duel anymore, so it wasn’t like they had to stand back and watch. The clinking of armor signalled their arrival, and before I could even turn, there was a searing pain in my thigh and enough warmth spreading down my leg for me to assume my femoral artery had just been severed.
Chime.
As the horse came barreling toward me, I braced myself. If I couldn’t get the man off the horse by dragging him down, then I would have to get him down by removing the horse from the equation. The thought of harming such a magnificent beast was like a hot stone in my gut, but until I knew the fighting style of each man in the army, I would have to remove any advantage being used against me.
The red beast’s hoofbeats were like the pounding of my heart. It was abusing my ribs so furiously that I couldn’t tell if my heart was just trying to get as many beats out before my next death or if it was all the adrenaline coursing through my veins. I didn’t have a chance to ponder it for too long because in the next breath, the horse was upon me.
I leaped to the side at the last second and sliced my sword along the horse’s legs as it galloped past. Its scream of pain made me turn away and close my eyes, and I prayed that it wouldn’t suffer for too long. The ground trembled as the animal collapsed, and a crack like a gunshot told me that either Lucian or the horse had just broken something.
From the agonized human scream, I guessed it was Lucian.
I opened my eyes again and turned to see the results of my attack. The horse had collapsed on its side, and blood was splattered on the grass around me. Lucian’s helmet had fallen off when he fell, and his face was paler than snow. His leg was completely crushed beneath the weight of his horse and no amount of struggling was going to free him of that pain.
Well, I guess that was one way to take him out of the equation.
Lucian looked up as I approached, and his eyes went wide as I lifted my sword.
“No--wait--please!” he cried and lifted his shield in defense.
I kicked the shield away and brought my sword down across his face. Blood and saliva splattered everywhere as the man took his last breath, and the metallic smell filled my nose.
The army was roaring and headed my way, but I took a moment to put the horse out of its misery. “I may have to do this to you a few more times, big guy, but I’ll do my best to keep you alive in the end.”
Having a bad ass war horse to join the fight was the advantage I needed, and while Elrin may have promised to get me some horses from the farmer, I couldn’t imagine they would be anywhere as amazing as this guy. I would find a way to free him of his rider and use his strength to my advantage.
But for now, I had an angry army to deal with.
A group of six spearmen were charging forward in a wedge shape with their weapons aimed at me like lances in a joust. In single combat, they would have been at a disadvantage because I was wearing armor that protected all but the smallest spots. A group of them could surround me, as I was already well aware of, and they only needed one good shot to bring me to my knees.
I lifted my shield as they approached, and I crouched slightly so that it covered as much of my body as possible. The lead spearman reached me, and I was able to easily deflect his weapon with my shield. The two at either side tried to jab me in the legs, but I just held my ground and let the points bounce off of my armor. Two more tried to cut behind me so I kicked the lead spearman in the chest and used the momentum to leap backward.
I parried a jab from the left and deflected a thrust from the right with my shield. Another jab came in at my groin so I darted backward to avoid it. More j
abs kept me from getting too close to the six men, and before long, the remaining twelve spearmen and the two dozen swordsmen were there to swell the numbers, and I was overwhelmed.
Chime.
I couldn’t just stand there like an idiot. The only way I was going to survive this massacre was if I kept moving. Higher terrain would have been nice, especially if I could bottleneck the army so I only had to fight them a few at a time, but I had already tried leading them away from the town and it hadn’t worked.
There wasn’t much around me except for the grassy plains. The hills here were so small that they were more like a few handfuls of dirt in a pile than actual good terrain. Even hiding in the tall grass wouldn’t have done me much good because my armor would give me away in a heartbeat.
These were men I was fighting, not stupid kobolds.
I sliced the legs of Lucian’s horse once more, and the man was once again caught beneath the animal’s weight. I wasted no time in killing them both, and I made sure to make my promise to the horse again. I knew it wouldn’t remember me speaking to it, but it just made me feel better about ending its life.
The army was racing forward with the six spearmen in their wedge formation at the front. There were two other identical wedges, and I could see the swordsmen forming up small groups as well. The crossbowmen were firing their bolts whenever they found an opening, and they had better aim than the kobolds did, but I expected each shot and raised my shield to swat each bolt away like an annoying fly.
Only one group needed to catch up and stall me long enough for the others to back them up. I knew I would need to find a way to scatter them in the end, but for now, I wanted to learn everything I could about how each group fought so I could take them down like the badass god I am in the final run through.
The first wedge of spears was composed of some of the more seasoned fighters. The leader was Sir Terrowin, and he was the most difficult to bring down. He was almost always the one that tore into my legs if I gave him an opening, but he also had a tendency to use his spear as a kind of battle staff. Some of his men would try the same thing, but none of them had the skill and technique that Sir Terrowin did.
