by Lucia Ashta
“She’s right,” Wren said, smiling broadly at our gentle fairy friend.
“Thanks for the pep talk, guys,” he said. “I’ve just gotten tired of constantly worrying the school will kick me out, of being the odd one out all the time, you know what I mean?”
“Do I ever...” I said.
“Are you going to eat that?” Sadie asked, and I thought she was talking to Dave, but she was talking to both of us. As had become our habit, we slid our plates of uneaten food toward the average-sized witch.
“I swear, I’ll never figure out where you stuff it all,” Jas said. For once, I agreed with her sentiment.
“What can I say?” Sadie mumbled over a mouthful. “I have a fast metabolism.”
“It’s gotta be more than that.” Jas eyed her up and down. “You eat like a grizzly bear shifter—like three grizzlies.”
Sadie shrugged and bit into my bagel. “At least I don’t waste. The trolls hate waste.”
“Do they ever,” Wren said. “I think they might hate everything.”
“They don’t,” Adalia said. “They just have really strong beliefs … and equally strong personalities.”
“Well, strong personality isn’t an excuse for their non-stop grumpiness,” Jas said. “I’ve never seen one of them even smile.”
All of us, even Sadie, blinked at Jas a few times, who was obviously oblivious to the finer details of her sparkling personality. Then Jas’ attention shot to the door behind us. “There they are.”
I didn’t need to turn around to figure out who she was talking about. I wished I could leave and head to class early, but if I did, Sadie would have to go with me, and she still had most of an omelet and half a bagel to go.
“Hi, Ky,” Jas called across the dining hall, forcing my brother and his crew—with Damon trailing them—over to our table. I debated the effect of giving Jas a sharp kick to the shin before deciding not to bother. What would be the point? Jas was … Jas.
“Hi, Jas,” Ky said, but his eyes were on me. “How you feeling today?”
“I’m fine.” I pinned my gaze on him and only him. As soon as Stacy saw me, she did her best to imitate an octopus with a thing for silver-haired princes. Her fingertips, capped in fire-engine red nail polish, swept across Leander’s shoulder to rest on his chest. I refused to look at either of them head-on.
“Good,” Ky was saying. “I was a little worried. You took quite a beating last night, squirt.”
“You would know. You were the one beating me.”
“I can’t take it easy on you. Rage won’t.”
“I know, I know.”
Boone stepped out from under the brunette groupie. “Maybe I could help. You’ve been sparring with her for a while. Maybe it’d be good to have someone different.”
Swan pouted over his shoulder, and I wondered, not for the first time, why the guys let these girls hang all over them. None of the boys seemed particularly into any of them. Maybe it was simply easier than dealing with their scorn.
While my brother and Boone debated the torturous routines they’d put me through later that evening, Sadie finally finished her breakfast. Feeling Leander’s eyes on me the whole time, I stood. “I’m heading to class early.”
Wren looked up at me. “Want me to come with you?” Dave prepared to stand too.
“No, thanks. I could use some quiet time alone. I haven’t had enough of it lately.” And by that I meant hardly any at all. Of course, time to myself was relative. I wouldn’t be going anywhere without Sadie behind me, and Wendi somewhere behind her.
But at least Sadie would give me space, and I’d be free from Leander’s stare, the one I could hardly bear anymore. No matter how much I tried, I couldn’t forget the way his lips had felt on mine or the way his hands held my hips possessively. I couldn’t avoid the memory of how his eyes had seared into mine. So much intensity … for a whole lot of nothing.
I picked up my teacup and silverware and headed for the dish depository. I sensed someone a few paces behind me; I figured it was Sadie with her pile of plates. Even the hardened Enforcer followed the trolls’ directions.
But when a hand wrapped around my upper arm, I knew exactly who it was. I went rigid and flung my fork and butter knife into the appointed tub with a loud clang. When I turned, I tried not to meet Leander’s eyes, but my traitorous heart had me looking right up into them.
“Can we talk, Rina? Please?”
I hesitated, wanting to say no, but discovered myself unable to resist the intense emotion rolling through his mercurial eyes. “About what?”
“You know about what.”
“Okay. Maybe I do. But what would be the point? Nothing’s changed, has it?”
He merely stared at me, and I had my confirmation. “Exactly. You already told me you don’t want me as part of your life.”
“That’s not true at all, and I hope you know it.” He wrapped both hands around my upper arms.
We were drawing unwanted attention. Every student who filed toward the dish depository flicked underhanded glances at us; some openly stared. Leander was slightly famous. I was slightly notorious. I didn’t blame the students; they couldn’t help themselves.
Leander captured my gaze as if we weren’t inside a packed dining hall. “I very much want to be with you.”
My heart thudded, and I just wanted to run away. Running from my problems wasn’t a long-term solution, but it was better than the squirming mess of desire and disappointment roiling through my insides.
“My father is extremely powerful. His influence is far reaching, and not just with the fae. He’d make things very hard for you if I chose to be with you. It wouldn’t be fair to do that to you. I can’t.”
“No, because you won’t even give us a chance.” Heat was building behind my eyes, and I hated that this mess had me wanting to cry. I would not cry in front of Leander, or any man—save my brother, of course; he didn’t count as a man.
“Rina...” His eyes implored me to understand, and while I suppose I did, this still sucked, big-time. “Let’s talk somewhere private. I can’t stand to have you angry at me.”
“I’m not mad at you. I’m just … disappointed, I guess, but I’ll get over it.” Eventually. I hoped.
“We can still be friends, can’t we?”
I chuckled without mirth, my heart chipping at his unintended blow. “No, Leander, I don’t think I can be friends with you. Not right now. Maybe not ever. I need some time to forget about you.”
Orangesicle and Rainbow squinted beady troll eyes at the two of us from the dish-washing area. We were probably breaking several of their rules, including congesting student traffic. But the trolls held back more than usual when the elfin prince was involved. They returned to their duties, flashing round troll butts in our general direction.
Leander stared at me for several long beats, during which the sensation of his hands on my arms heated the entirety of my body. “I don’t want you to forget about me.”
“Well, you can’t have it both ways. That’s not fair to me.”
“I know.”
“You don’t want to be with me—” He opened his mouth to protest again, but I powered on. Despite his father’s rules, he still had a choice. There was always a choice—maybe not an easy choice or even a good one, but a choice nonetheless. “You choose not to be with me, fine. But you can’t both have me and not. I owe myself better than that.”
“I can’t stop thinking about you.” His eyes widened as if he hadn’t meant to blurt that out.
I offered him a faint smile. “I think about you too, but thinking isn’t enough for me. I either want to be with you, or I want to be free of you.” I wasn’t sure that was a fair expression of how I felt, but I didn’t care. I had enough on my plate with Rage and company; I didn’t need my heart spazzing out on me to boot.
“Look, I need to go. Besides, Stacy’s waiting for you.” I worked to deaden my eyes. I was not jealous. “She doesn’t know what to do with her gro
pey paws now that you’re not there.”
“I told you, it’s not like that between us. She’s just a classmate, a friend. We’ve been in classes together since first term.”
“Whatever. You do you, I’m gonna do me.” I plastered a winning smile on my face, one that was sure to fall short of convincing him of my nonchalance, but it was the best I could do. “Have a great day.”
“We have the next class together, Rina.”
As if I could forget... “Well then I guess I’ll see ya there.” I slipped from his hold and stalked past him, blinking rapidly to clear the wet heat behind my eyes, sensing every one of my friends and his trailing me. I didn’t meet a single one of their curious gazes. I strode straight to the double doors, pushed them open, and escaped outside.
I walked with purpose down the path that circumnavigated the grassy quad, though it was far too early to head to Defensive Creature Magic. When I heard the faint sound of the doors opening and closing behind me, I knew Sadie was tailing me. But Sadie, unlike Leander, would give me the space I needed. Damn the prince and his thoughtful heart. Damn those eyes that claimed he wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him. And screw the king of the elves and his racist requirements for his son and kingdom.
My feet took off in a run as if they understood what I needed better than I did. I ran until I reached the end of the quad, slipped between the buildings that housed the girls’ dormitory and the library, and stilled long enough to call on my mountain lion.
The connection between her and me had grown stronger over the weeks of McGinty’s class and the practice sessions with my brother. I experienced her urge to run free as if it were my own—hell, maybe it was my own. The more I connected with her, the more difficult it became to distinguish where my lion ended and I started.
Picturing my lion’s thick fur, her golden-copper eyes, and the strength of her muscles, I felt what it was like to be her. I wrapped the sensation of her perfect design around my human body. I pictured my lion apart from me as well as one with me. Then I pulsed the energy—my shifter magic, I now knew—which had collected without thought within my core, outward toward the image of my lion. My magic flooded my senses and my body, tingling along my limbs.
I landed on four massive paws and took off running without checking behind me. I needed to run free more than I needed Sadie shadowing every one of my steps. I ran through the forest that surrounded the campus until my spirit lost some of its restlessness and my breathing came heavy but steady. I ran until the first bell announced I had fifteen minutes to get to my first class, then pivoted and sprinted in the direction of Bundry Hall, where Defensive Creature Magic was meeting this morning.
I had a lot of ground to cover and I had to be on time. Marcy June liked to make examples of those who were late to class, or otherwise acted up, by making them demonstrate her defensive exercises. Like Marcy June, who didn’t waste time on gentle maneuvers, her demonstrations were brutal and to the point.
I tore across the thick forest, trees and bushes and flowers whipping past me so fast they merged into a sea of color. I released a burst of speed and pulled in a true breath of freedom. Now that I knew what it was like to be in the body of my lion, I didn’t think I could do without her. She was powerful and free from the mess of emotions that burdened my mind and heart. Within her, the only thing that mattered was magic and power—two things I apparently had in spades.
Now all I had to do was master them...
13
I managed to shift back to human form after only a few failed attempts, which was definitely significant progress. By the time I eased into the shifter practice room in Bundry Hall, the large high-ceilinged space was packed. Students and staff alike lined the walls to watch whatever was about to go down in the middle of the room on the padded mats.
My stomach churned. What did Marcy June have in mind? The professor wasn’t one to hold back, not even in her classes. I wondered which poor sod she was going to use to demonstrate, hoping it wouldn’t be me or any of my friends. Selfish, I know, but I couldn’t help it.
I slid next to Wren and the rest of my friends just as the bell announcing the start of classes rang out. Phew. I’d made it in time. Today was definitely not the day to give Marcy June reason to pay extra attention to you.
“What’s going on?” I whispered to Wren, while Sadie slipped through the door behind me. Her sharp eyes scanned the crowd in a continuous sweep until they alighted upon me, then they relaxed. Sadie took her job seriously, which was more than I could say for Wendi, whom I saw less often than I probably should—though I definitely wasn’t complaining. The prim enforcer hadn’t done much to endear herself to me, though she was careful to go through the motions of what she thought would win me over—and that was the main reason she hadn’t.
Dave answered for Wren, leaning across her. “Marcy June is going to spar with Sadie.” His eyebrows danced across his brow. “This is going to be so effing cool.”
“Marcy June told those of us who were here early,” Wren said, “and a few of the students ran out, to spread the news I guess. I have no idea how everyone got here so quickly. They must’ve dropped what they were doing and booked it here.”
The news had obviously spread far and wide. Orangesicle and Rainbow were here, along with the newly nicknamed Berry Crush with the fuchsia fro-hawk, and a handful of other pygmy trolls I hadn’t made up names for yet. Professors McGinty and Quickfoot stood off to the side, conferring with their heads together, and even Professor Damante had deigned to come. He stood apart from everyone, leaning against the wall as if he didn’t have a care in the world, drawing the eye of many of the girls there.
Even the Gropey Gaggle, consisting of Stacy, Tracy, and Swan, flicked the occasional glance at the vampire professor, whose smug understated smile indicated he knew precisely the effect he was garnering. He wore his arrogance with the same ease as he sported his pale gray suit that accentuated the perfect lines of his body, the defined angles of his face, and the intensity of his eyes. His lips were nearly cherry red, and I had to remind myself that this man was a predator—most likely a highly dangerous one, professor or not.
Standing with my brother and Boone, and their ever-present devotees, Leander caught my eye—of course he did—and I hurried to look away, but not before he brushed Stacy’s hand away from where it encroached on his shoulder. She trained a glare on me as if I’d been the one to reject her instead of him, and I turned away. I’d had enough drama for one morning.
Whispers circled the room, and students gawked as Damon entered with … a centaur. No, the creature wasn’t a centaur—he had wings, and he walked alongside the tall Enforcer.
“Who is that?” I whispered, succumbing to the tangible awe that imbued the room.
“That’s Egan,” Adalia said. “He’s a professor here, though I’m pretty sure he only teaches the really advanced material. He’s a legend.”
“Why? Why’s he a legend?” Dave asked in a reverent whisper.
“All I know is he’s supposed to be amazing. And he’s one of the last of his kind. Creatures like him were hunted nearly to extinction. They’re supposed to contain more power than three supes their size.”
“Wow,” Dave said. “He’s huge.”
He was. The size of a giant stallion; there was no way you’d miss him in a crowd.
“Hey, everybody,” Marcy June called out, drawing everyone’s attention to the center of the room and hushing the excited whispers. “I see word got around about what I have planned for today’s class. So y’all came to enjoy a good fight, huh?” Affirmative murmurs whisked across the space. “Well, you’re creatures after my own heart. There’s nothing better than a good, solid fight.”
Actually, I could think of about a thousand things I’d rather do than spar: watch a good movie with a tub of pralines and cream ice cream, hang out with my friends, sleep … kiss Leander. Shit.
Marcy June was working her audience, arms spread wide like sh
e was the ringleader of a circus, egging everyone on. “You’re about to see one heck of a fight!”
A few people hollered, and I was pretty sure two of them were the shifter Professor McGinty and the gnome Professor Quickfoot. Memories of Quickfoot with his bloody ax after the Attack last term invaded my mind, and I forcefully pushed them away.
“Sadie, come out here.” Marcy June waved my protector out into the middle of the floor. Sadie stalked into the center in a Wonder Woman t-shirt, ripped jeans, shit-kicker boots, and enough confidence imbuing her stride that I couldn’t decide who would win this match. Sadie started unfastening the sheaths that hung from either side of her waist, placing the curved blades off to the side.
“Sadie and I’ve known each other since our time as students at the Menagerie,” Marcy June said. “We were friends and fierce competitors. I owe a few broken bones to this lady right here.” She looked at Sadie wistfully, like broken bones were a cool thing, further cementing the notion that the petite professor and I had markedly different priorities.
“As y’all know, we’ve been under constant threat for a while now, hence the creation of this Defensive Creature Magic class. And while the greatest threat we’re currently under comes from shifters and vamps, in the supernatural world nothing is predictable, nothing at all, and that’s a guarantee. So while mages usually keep to their own in this fight, it’s far better to prepare for the unexpected than to be taken by surprise. Surprise in the wrong circumstances gets you as dead as you get.”
Wren leaned into me. I knew enough of the willowy girl now to realize she was trying to offer me comfort in case Marcy June’s words were freaking me out, and yeah, they kind of were. She wasn’t known for being tactful, that was for damn sure.
Marcy June spun to take in everyone gathered. “Now, some of you might not realize that Sadie is a special case. She comes off as a feisty-as-fuck shifter, but she isn’t a shifter. She’s a witch. Still, even the Academy Spell recognized that she wouldn’t have fit in with tight-assed magicians, so she studied here. Always, magic is fluid. You’ve gotta remember that. Even a hundred-year-old spell gets that, and the sooner you do, the sooner you’ll be prepared to take on whatever’s coming.
