by Fiona Miers
James’s strong presence made her knees weak, and the scent of him was rather intoxicating. She was not certain what the scent was, but it appealed to her unlike anything had ever before.
His bright green eyes sent shivers of delight through her body. Her heart pounded in her chest, most certainly perfectly synchronized with James’s heartbeat.
Kitty wished for nothing more than for James to take her in his arms and kiss her, but to her dismay, he released her and stepped away.
“My apologies, my lady,” James whispered and shook his head in disapproval.
To whom was his disapproving expression aimed? At her or himself? She was much too breathless to inquire.
“There is no need to apologize, Your Grace. I mean… James,” Kitty assured him. “It is perhaps I who must apologize. I am perfectly aware you do not wish to experience feelings after what you have been through. I would most certainly not wish to—”
Before Kitty could complete her words, they were interrupted by James’s swift motion towards her. His hands cradled her delicate face, and his lips pressed against hers, drowning out any thoughts she had in her mind and any words she still wished to speak.
His thumb stroked her cheek as the kiss lingered on, the heat rising up into Kitty’s bosom. A fire ignited inside her, and her heart pounded painfully, yet blissfully against her ribs.
James’s lips were the first to move away, which caused Kitty to open her eyes, her breathing ragged and strained. James’s eyes were wide and she wondered what thoughts ran through his mind.
James seemed torn, as if wondering if kissing her had been a wise choice, and Kitty desperately wished to assure him that it was.
“James,” she panted breathlessly.
James licked his lips, and despite the urge to kiss him once more, she bit her bottom lip and stepped away as well.
“My apologies, my lady. I do not know what came over me,” James said. “I do not behave this way.”
“Please do not apologize, as I wish I possessed the courage to do precisely the same,” Kitty admitted. “And please do not feel guilty, as it was not unwanted nor unsolicited.”
James’s shoulders eased, but he remained distant. “We must go.”
Kitty reached for the reins and led her horse back to the meadow, following beside James and his horse.
Neither of them spoke a word, despite Kitty wishing to do so on multiple occasions. She merely did not know what to say. They had shared a tender kiss under the bright blue cloudless sky, causing her heart to pound like a thousand drums, and despite the hundreds of thoughts wistfully dancing around in her mind, none of those thoughts would suffice to express the emotions she felt.
Kitty understood that James felt overwhelmed and fearful of expressing feelings for her, or for anyone else, and perhaps all this had happened too fast?
Why would he kiss her if he did not feel anything for her?
If it was not something he did on a regular basis—or at all, in his case—surely it meant something.
“James?” Kitty whispered.
“My lady,” James answered, returning to a more formal way of speaking.
“Have you ever kissed another woman in such a manner, Your Grace?” Kitty asked boldly.
“Not that I can recall,” James answered simply, which made Kitty smile in relief.
Perhaps he did not love her, and perhaps she was not the first woman he had kissed, but she was most certainly the only woman whom he had kissed in that manner.
“The smile on your face reeks of satisfaction. Tell me why, my lady,” James said.
Kitty lowered her gaze and stared at the grass blowing lightly in the breeze. “Simply, you stating that I was the first woman you kissed so tenderly, makes me feel special.”
“You are a special woman, Kitty. You should not forget that.”
“I shall try,” Kitty said and glanced shyly at James, whose gaze still rested on her. “But I am fairly certain I would require a reminder from time to time.”
James glanced at her for a moment, then a smile broke through his pensive expression and he chuckled softly.
They reached the meadow, where Kenneth was casually positioned in the shade of a leafy green tree, but he quickly rose to his feet when James and Kitty approached.
“Your Grace, my lady. Is everything well?” Kenneth inquired.
“Indeed, Kenneth. Thank you. The duke was merely licking his wounds, and required more time to do so, hence why we were gone so long,” Kitty answered before James could do so.
“Indeed. I noticed you had won the race. Well done, my lady,” Kenneth smiled.
“Thank you, dear Kenneth,” Kitty smiled happily and glanced at James.
“Perhaps you can give His Grace a few riding lessons, my lady.”
Kitty suppressed a chuckle and nodded. “Perhaps I shall, Kenneth.”
“Kenneth, lead us back to the manor, please,” James ordered, his voice strained with a hint of annoyance.
She shared a look with Kenneth as they remounted the horses, and together led them back to the manor.
Kitty occasionally glanced at James, who seemed preoccupied with his own thoughts. Occasionally he would return her gaze with an intent glance, which had Kitty believe he felt rather emasculated by Kenneth’s remarks.
Walking along the pathway between the manor and the stable, the horses came to a stop and James dismounted his stallion. He stood beside Kitty’s horse and assisted her in her own dismount, although she was perfectly capable on her own. Of course, she did not make him aware of that, as it would only add insult to injury. The last thing she wished to do was to alienate James.
Kitty watched as Kenneth led the three horses to the stable and turned to James. “That was a lovely morning, James. I thank you for that.”
“It pleases me that my lady had a delightful time,” James said.
As James turned away, Kitty reached for his arm and grabbed it. “James, wait.”
James glanced at her over his shoulder and turned to face her.
“Is everything well?” Kitty inquired, a strange feeling rising up inside her.
James’s eyes seemed dark and troubled as he gazed silently at her, his jaw clenched.
“There is something that requires my attention,” James answered wryly.
“Can I be of assistance to you, Your Grace?” Kitty spoke softly.
“No.” James’s answer was curt and he turned away once more, disappearing through the doors of the manor.
Kitty bit her bottom lip in a mixture of disappointment and concern but attempted to convince herself that she was not the one at fault. James clearly was preoccupied with something, and she should not fret over it.
10
Much later that night, as the manor darkened and quieted down for the night, James paced around his bedchamber, the rain drumming hard again the windows.
He could not forget the tender kiss he and Kitty had shared earlier that morning, but feelings of unease had risen along with those feelings of endearment.
James had vowed to himself ever since Lady Montgomery exited his life, that he would not allow any other woman to reach that vulnerable part of him, yet he wished that Kitty would appear at his door and inform him that he was silly and perhaps kiss him again.
The taste of Kitty’s sweet mouth still lingered on James’s lips as he stared out the window. He wished desperately to possess the courage to go to her, to speak with her, and to explain why he was acting so foolishly.
It had been a long while since anyone expressed such an interest in him, and made him feel the way he felt while he’d kissed Kitty.
He had not spoken much during dinner, and had excused himself earlier when he received a letter from an old acquaintance to retreat to his study. Perhaps he was a coward and did not deserve to have such a fine young woman as Kitty to be his wife.
The rain continued to pour and it was rather odd to imagine only hours ago there was not a cloud in sight. The storm had arri
ved faster than anyone could have predicted, but James’s paranoia told him that is was an omen.
Its meaning, however, was still unknown.
He continued to stare through the window until movement caught his attention. It was only for a moment, but James’s brow furrowed as he stepped closer to the window. The dark figure opened the door of the stable and rushed inside. James’s jaw clenched, but he was fairly certain it was simply one of his grooms. No person in his sane mind would be outside in this downpour.
Thunder rumbled in the distance and James stepped away from the window, closing the drapes. He recalled a memory from his youth, where his mother had warned him and his siblings of the dangers of thunderstorms, and that they should never leave the drapes open. Her words sounded in his mind as if she spoke them for the very first time, and James sighed as the nostalgia struck him the same manner as the thunder struck the earth.
James sat on the leather chair in the corner of his chamber and reached for the book that lay on the table beside him. He settled into a comfortable position and immersed himself between the pages of an old philosophy book his father had adored as the fire in the hearth provided the much needed heat to warm not only the entire room, but also the cold chill he felt inside him.
The amount of time that passed was unbeknownst to James as a soft, barely audible knock sounded on his chamber door. He glanced at the door, wondering if he had imagined it. Another knock sounded, more urgent than the previous, and he closed the book, placing it on the table beside him.
He stood and made his way to the door. He briefly glanced at the large, upright clock that stood in the corner of the chambers and his brow furrowed. It was nearly midnight and his servants were well aware he did not wish to be disturbed this late.
James reached for the door and opened it slowly. He gasped as he glanced at a drenched Kitty standing in front of him. Her hair was dripping wet, her dress clung to her body, and her lips trembled violently.
“My lady,” James gasped and stepped aside, allowing her to enter. “Are you well?”
Kitty entered the chambers without a word and James closed the door. As he reached for a woollen blanket to wrap around her shoulders, she turned to him with an intent glance on her face.
“What did I do wrong, James?” Kitty inquired, her voice hoarse and breathless.
“I do not understand,” James said.
“We had a lovely morning, we shared parts of ourselves with each other,” Kitty murmured and slowly approached him. “We even shared a tender and wonderful moment where you kissed me. You even openly admitted that you had never kissed any woman in such a manner, yet you did not speak much during dinner, excused yourself early and still insist that nothing is the matter.”
Oh, no… “My lady—”
“It’s Kitty when we are alone,” she said, a fierce flash in her eyes catching him off guard. “What did I do to make you not wish to be near me?”
“It is nothing that you did,” James admitted. “I am the one at fault.”
“Tell me how I can fix it.”
If only that were possible. “It is not your duty to fix it.”
Kitty stepped closer to him, and he felt the cold emanating from her body. Her lips trembled as she glanced up at him, and her hands touched his chest. The contact sent pulses of longing through James and despite knowing it would most certainly not be in either one’s best interest, James could not fight the feelings of desire inside him.
He placed his hands on Kitty’s narrow shoulders and pressed his lips against hers. A soft moan escaped her mouth and she pressed closer.
James wrapped his arms around Kitty, drawing her tight. Her bosoms pressed against him and her heart pounded against his chest.
“Wait,” James breathed against her lips. “Kitty, I do not wish for you to do anything you will regret in the morning.”
Kitty tilted her chin upwards, staring into James’s eyes, her own sparkling like two sapphires in the moonlight. “James, there will not be a single thing I would regret as long as you do it to me,” Kitty murmured, her eyes beckoning him to take her.
“Only if you are certain, my lady,” James whispered.
Kitty nodded slowly, her pink lips pouting at James and drawing him in. His hands caressed the skin below her neck, the curves of her ample bosoms. He lightly fingered the ribbons in the front of her dress, and delicately loosened them.
As if Kitty read his mind, she slid her sleeves from her shoulders.
James inhaled slowly, to compose himself against the strong feelings rising up inside him. Although momentarily he thought that things had already gone too far, this was exactly what he wanted. He wanted Kitty, and she wanted him.
James peeled the wet dress from Kitty’s body, never tearing his gaze away from her. He couldn’t even if he tried.
Her petite, yet curvy figure that had been hidden underneath her dress was utter perfection. Much to his surprise, Kitty slowly undressed James as well, making him feel exposed, vulnerable.
James took her hands in his and led her to his bed, staring at her form in awe, and laying down beside her. Their bodies intertwined with one another, tenderly and without a moment’s hesitation. She was a maiden—untouched by the hands of men—which pleased James even more.
Kitty’s body quivered against his, an occasional wince forming on her lips, her brows furrowing as James’s thrusts were slow and steady. A soft moan escaped her throat as his rhythmic movements began to quicken. James pressed his mouth against her lips, muffling the sounds, as he did not wish Kitty’s parents to be aware of what they were doing.
Fornication before marriage was not entirely unheard of—it was much more common than most believed—but James did not wish Lord and Lady Dunne to know he had defiled their daughter.
Kitty brought her arms up and pressed her fingers against the skin of James’s back, and her legs wrapped around his waist. The young lady threw her head back as waves of desire passed over them.
Kitty turned her head to the side, closing her eyes as James pressed his lips against the soft skin of her neck. He couldn’t continue to go slow.
His rhythm increased in speed, causing Kitty’s lips to part. She panted softly, pushing her fingernails into James’s back. Her back arched, making her breasts press against James’s chest.
He groaned loudly as his body tightened. He was nearing the edge. He moved even faster, thumping the headboard into the wall now.
There was no way of staying quiet.
The wave of release picked him up and he thrust one final time, Kitty moaned in unison with him as waves of passion flowed over them, and through them.
James collapsed beside Kitty, panting loudly.
Breathlessly, he pulled her close and as she pressed his hand against her bosom, he felt the rapid beating of her heart, as satisfying at the deed itself.
11
James’s fingertips skimmed Kitty’s back and shivers of delight washed over her. She turned her head to the side, glancing at James, who lay beside her.
His skin was smooth to the touch she had come to realize when she’d removed his dress shirt earlier. His pale, broad shoulders—the same shoulders that had held her against him—were now beside her, at ease and exposed.
Kitty rolled onto her side, allowing James’s fingertips to graze along her shoulder and down her arm.
“James,” Kitty whispered.
“Kitty,” James whispered in return.
“The rain has stopped.”
There was a moment of quiet as James turned his head to listen. “Indeed, it has.”
“When I was a young girl, I spent most rainy nights indoors, as a true lady should,” Kitty said and rolled her eyes. “But there is no better feeling than walking in the rain. It awakens my senses and allows me to feel invigorated.”
“Was that why you were outside last evening?” James inquired.
“How did you know?” Kitty asked.
“I saw someone dash into the stable, b
ut I could not see who it was. If I had known it was you, I would have ensured you were not drenched by the rain, my lady” James answered.
“But I would have been no less drenched regardless.” Kitty grinned and pouted her lips.
James shrugged. “But what were you doing in the stables?”
“In all honesty,” Kitty said and glanced at James, “I wished to relive the happy moments I spent with you in the meadow by spending time with the horse you rode. And perhaps it sounds utterly daft, but it made me feel better for a while.”
“Only for a while?”
She nodded her head. “Indeed, which was the reason I came to your bedchamber. I wished to receive clarification with regards to your withdrawal. As I mentioned, I was convinced I had done something that upset you, despite not knowing what it was,” Kitty explained.
“Kitty,” James murmured once more and shifted his body closer to hers. He reached his hand over to hers and weaved his fingers between hers then closed them, creating a firm grasp of her hand. “There is nothing more important to me than your happiness. Despite not being acquainted with you for a long period of time—”
“Or even a week,” Kitty chuckled with amusement.
“Indeed,” James smiled. “But it does feel as though we have known one another longer.”
“I could not agree more, James. Why is that?” Kitty asked as she placed their interlocked hands against her chest. Hopefully he was able to feel the pounding of her heart.
“I am not entirely certain. I attempted to rationalise it in my mind, but I could not. I still cannot, in fact. Opening up to people is difficult for me.”
“Your father taught you not to,” Kitty whispered and turned to look at him.
His eyes were filled with a sadness she understood, as both she and James had been raised to appease their parents.
Kitty smiled and slowly pushed herself into a sitting position. “James, I must return to my chamber. I wouldn’t wish for my mother and father to see me as I leave your bedchamber. There is no telling what my father might do.”
