by Pam Howes
Mary chewed on her lip, taking big gulps of air. ‘Molly, what do you have to say about this, chuck?’
Molly shrugged but her voice started to crack. ‘Whatever you think is best. If it makes it easier, I’ll g-go. And then there’s only you and Bella to worry about, Mam.’
Bella reached for her mam and sister’s hands, giving them a squeeze. ‘Mam, we’re not the only family in Liverpool that’s got to do this,’ she said. ‘Everybody we know is either sending their little ones to safety or the men and older boys are joining up.’
Mam sat back down, tears in her eyes again. ‘I feel like I’m losing my family one by one here. This was not how I saw my life panning out.’ She took a deep breath and tried to smile. ‘That bleedin’ Hitler. If I ever get my hands on him, he’ll rue the day he was born.’
‘You and the rest of us, gel. Get in the queue,’ Dad said. ‘We’ll have one more weekend as normal as we can and then on Monday we’ll get Molly sorted out, and make sure that cellar is as safe and as comfortable as it can be. I’ve a feeling you’ll be spending a fair bit of time down there.’
The last Saturday in May, Bobby held Bella tight as he kissed her goodbye on the platform at Lime Street station. He looked so smart in his blue air force uniform and her heart thumped hard as he looked into her eyes. He was travelling to the Brize Norton base in Oxfordshire, where he was joining his father, who had resumed his position as a wing commander. She was conscious of his mother and the girl Alicia, who had been brought to live with the Harrison family while her father spent the last few weeks of his life in a sanatorium, staring at them.
‘I’ll write to you,’ he whispered to Bella. ‘Please write back as often as you can. I love you.’
‘I will,’ she whispered back. ‘I love you too. I’d better let those two say their goodbyes now. If looks could kill,’ she added, feeling Alicia’s eyes burning into her back. ‘Stay safe, please.’
‘I’ll do my best. And if I get any time off, I’ll be right back to see you.’
She swallowed hard and backed away so that his mother and Alicia could say their farewells. His mother came back to stand beside Bella, sobbing. Alicia’s piping voice carried loud and clear over the noise and hustle and bustle of the station as people said goodbye to their loved ones.
‘Darling Robert,’ she simpered. ‘Keep yourself safe for me. I promise to write every day until you’re back home with us, your family.’ She emphasised the ‘your family’ as though Bella meant nothing and, tossing her long blonde hair over her shoulders, she flung herself at him so hard he nearly fell backwards onto a couple of squaddies who were strolling past with their kit bags slung on their backs.
‘Steady on, mate,’ one of them joked. ‘Lucky you,’ said the other.
Bobby looked embarrassed, his cheeks flushed pink, and he gave a final wave and hurried away down the platform along with a crowd of soldiers and airmen. Alicia joined Bobby’s mother and Bella noticed the sly look in the girl’s eyes. Alicia slipped her arm through Fenella’s and said, ‘Don’t worry Aunty Fen, we’ll look after one another while our menfolk look after our country.’
Bella felt angry – Bobby was her manfolk – but she wasn’t getting into an argument here with the girl. She’d been told a few weeks ago that Alicia was staying at Bobby’s for the foreseeable future, and she now wondered what they’d talked about on nights she wasn’t seeing him, which, apart from the choir nights and the singing at the Legion, hadn’t been all that often lately with the way things were.
‘Of course we will, darling,’ Fenella assured her. ‘We’ll be just like mother and daughter while they’re away.’
Alicia’s smug smile was more than Bella could bear and she waved them goodbye and hurried to jump on a bus outside the station while they waited for the car to pick them up. Bobby’s father had hired a driver who was exempt from war duties as he was too elderly. All right for some, Bella thought as she took a seat upstairs on the crowded bus. They could have offered her a lift as they were going so close to Victory Street.
Her mind played tricks all the way home and by the time she got off the bus she’d convinced herself that Bobby wouldn’t write, he’d just said that because she’d expect it, and he would come home when the war was over and marry Alicia, like his mother so obviously wanted. She hammered on Fran’s door and when Fran let her in she burst into tears. Fran led her through to the back room, where Edie was sitting at the table cradling a mug of tea in her hands.
‘Where is everyone?’ Bella sobbed, looking round.
‘Granny’s asleep in the front room, Mam’s at the shops and Dad and the boys are all away, of course. Me and Edie were just having a natter.’ She peered at Bella. ‘Right, what’s up? Oh, I know, you’ve been to wave Bobby off haven’t you. Bless you; he’ll be okay, just like my Frankie will. He’ll write as soon as he can.’
Bella bawled her eyes out at that and told Fran and Edie what had happened at Lime Street station.
‘Well the devious little cow,’ Fran said. ‘How dare she and right in front of his girl as well. I’d have slapped her face.’
‘I might have been tempted if his mother hadn’t been there. After they said their goodbyes I didn’t get the chance to say anything else to him as he was getting on his train. It was packed down there, so many of our boys going away. I don’t have a good feeling about it at all, Fran.’
‘He’ll be fine, Bella,’ Edie reassured her. ‘He’s not going to be flying planes for a good while anyway; he’ll be more likely to be on lookout duties around the area. But at least he’ll feel he’s doing something to help. And he’ll write, you know he will.’ She poured Bella a mug of tea and handed it to her. ‘Get that down you while it’s hot.’
‘Thank you.’ Bella sighed and took a sip. ‘I know he won’t be flying, but that doesn’t mean it’ll be all ground work for him. He’ll be taken up to fly with others, no doubt, and I can’t help worrying.’
Edie shook her head. ‘Not a lot we can do about it but wait. And sing. Don’t forget, we’ve got the extra night at the Legion next week, Friday and Saturday. Something to look forward to at least. We’ll get a bit of practice in this week and it will help take our minds off other things for a while.’
13
August 1940
With Dad somewhere miles away and Molly safely evacuated to North Wales, it was just Bella and her mam who dashed down to the cellar as the air raid siren sounded, wailing loud and clear.
This was the fifth night in succession that their sleep had been disturbed. Bella felt weary and the camp beds were uncomfortable, but so far their street had been safe. Nearby Stevenson Street had taken a hit in a big way. Several houses had been destroyed and deaths and many casualties reported. It brought it home to them that this was all too real and they couldn’t take a chance and stay in bed, because Victory Street might be next. At least down in the cellar they could light a couple of candles, and they’d made a flask of tea just in case, before they’d turned in for the night.
‘What’s that noise?’ Bella whispered, once they were tucked up the best they could. She could hear a scratching noise and the hairs on the back of her neck rose. ‘Oh my God, is it a mouse?’ She drew her legs up and wrapped a blanket around herself.
Mam cocked her ear and then shook her head. ‘It’s outside. Probably one of the ARP wardens doing a check to make sure everywhere is dark. Sounds like boots scraping on concrete to me. Perhaps he’s stood in dog muck or something and is trying to clean his boot on the edge of the pavement.’
Bella breathed a sigh of relief and tried to relax. She tossed and turned and gave up on sleep as a bad job, her mind going over the events of the last few weeks. Her last letter from Bobby was safely stashed away in her handbag and that was lying beside her camp bed, but the others he’d sent were upstairs in her bedside drawers. If a bomb fell on the house they’d be destroyed. She thought about going and getting them, but she could hear the drone of planes as they circled the area.
Ear-splitting thuds sounded, making her jump, and she wondered who’d copped for those particular bombs. Half of the city had been badly damaged already; many of the city centre shops and businesses had been hit, whole streets of houses down near the dock, churches, schools, and row after row of tenements in the poorer inner-city area.
It seemed the Germans would keep on until they’d flattened the lot. Fran hadn’t heard from Frankie for over five weeks and was frantic with worry. He’d been sent to France last month and his last letter had been posted before he left England. Bella and Edie tried their best to keep her spirits up, but it was hard to keep cheerful with so much uncertainty. Nearly every shift at the factory had been interrupted by an air raid warning and even though some had been false alarms, they still had to hurry along to the shelters.
Bella still picked up a copy of the Liverpool Echo on her way home from work. She felt closer to her dad when she could see a copy on the dining table. She’d read tonight that terrible things were happening to Jewish people in a place built by the Germans in occupied Poland. The place was named Auschwitz and was being called a concentration camp by the newspaper reporters. People were being herded like sheep into the camp and reports claimed that thousands had been killed by being gassed to death just simply for the fact they were Jewish.
Liverpool had a big Jewish community, many of whom owned the local businesses. Bella hoped that the Germans wouldn’t come rounding up people from their own city. The whole nightmare of this war seemed never-ending.
She turned on her side, nearly tipping the camp bed over, and prayed for the all-clear warning. Mam was already asleep, snoring gently, after her long day at Olive Mount Hospital. They’d had injured military staff brought in as well as the sick children they usually nursed. She’d worked extra hours to help get unused rooms and wards cleaned and ready for the new patients, and had been shattered when she came home from work.
Eventually, feeling her eyes closing, Bella gave in and drifted off to sleep. Her dreams were as explosive as the bombs falling on her city and several times she awoke with a jump, thinking she could hear footsteps in the rooms above. ‘Hurry up, morning,’ she muttered.
Finally she heard the faint wailing of the all-clear sirens. She got up quietly, picked up her handbag and crept up the cellar steps. Mam would go mad if she woke her up and she hoped the door wouldn’t creak too loudly. She took a peep around the downstairs rooms but all seemed intact, although it was pretty dark with no lights showing anywhere. Upstairs, she luxuriated in the double bed that was all hers now and then felt immediately guilty that her sisters weren’t with her. She closed her eyes and fell asleep within seconds.
When the girls arrived at work the following morning they were all told to assemble in the canteen, where hot tea and plates of buttered toast were waiting for them. Everyone took a seat. George Barratt, the foreman, stood at the top end of the room and asked for silence as he had an announcement to make.
He cleared his throat and began. ‘I’m afraid I have some very bad news to relate. Last night, our other factory in Litherland was completely destroyed by bombs. Several members of our night shift were killed. Needless to say this is a tragedy and our thoughts and sympathy go out to their families. Today we will close this site as a mark of respect. I know that many of you knew staff down there and some of you are also related. Finish your teas, go home, and stay safe and I’ll see you tomorrow, all being well.’
‘Blimey,’ Fran said, shaking her head. ‘Well, that puts moaning about the ration books and gas masks into perspective.’
‘It does indeed,’ Edie agreed. ‘Oh God, this is awful. Some of the girls that went on nights a while back used to work alongside us here. It doesn’t bear thinking about.’
Bella took a deep breath. ‘And I did nothing but grumble to myself last night because I had disturbed sleep. I feel consumed with guilt now.’
‘We all moaned,’ Fran said. ‘So don’t feel too bad about it.’
Bella nodded wearily. ‘Shall we all go back to mine? Mam’s at work, we’ll have the place to ourselves. We could do some rehearsing for the weekend. Cheer us up a bit. Maybe learn a new song or two.’
Fran sighed and finished her tea. ‘Come on then, sup up. Let’s go. It’s not often we get a day off midweek.’
As they jumped from the tram near The Mystery Park a sudden thought struck Bella. ‘Will you come to Bobby’s house with me please? I just want to see if they’re okay and if they’ve had any letters recently. It’s been over two weeks since I last had one and he usually writes at least once a week. I’m presuming he’s still in Oxfordshire, but who knows.’
The threesome linked arms and strode across the park. Apart from the stench of burning in the air and plumes of smoke in the distance, the day was warm and bright and quite pleasant. Bella knocked on the door of Bobby’s house and stepped back, rocking on her heels. Eventually the door was opened and Margaret stood there, her uniform as crisp as on the Christmas Day they’d been invited to dinner.
She smiled, but didn’t seem to recognise Bella. ‘Yes, ladies, can I help you?’
‘Is Mrs Harrison at home, please? Bella asked, chewing her lip nervously.
‘I’m sorry, dear. Mrs Harrison and Miss Alicia are away in Oxfordshire. They went last week and are staying with friends for the foreseeable future. Wing Commander Harrison and young Master Robert are stationed in that area so it made sense for the rest of the family to stay down there. I believe it’s safer as they are out in the country. Whom shall I say called, if Mrs Harrison rings later?’
‘Err, well I’m Bobby, err Robert’s girlfriend, Bella. I met you at Christmas, Margaret.’
Margaret peered short-sightedly at her. ‘Ah, yes, I recognise you now, miss. The young lady that was taken ill at Christmas lunchtime. Very well, I’ll let them know.’
Bella nodded. ‘I just wondered if they’d heard from Robert lately, that’s all.’
‘Well, a couple of letters arrived on Saturday and I’ll forward them on. One for Mrs Harrison and the other one for Miss Alicia, both in young Mr Robert’s handwriting.’
‘Thank you.’ Bella felt like she’d been punched in the stomach. So, he could find the time to write to bloody Alicia and his mother, but not to her. And he was still in England – letters only took a couple of days to arrive, even with a war on. If there was nothing for her when she got home, she would write to him tonight and give him a piece of her mind.
Back at Bella’s house the girls sat at the table and listed all the songs they knew, including the ones that Bobby had sung with Bella. There wasn’t much else they could come up with and Fran shook her head. ‘So many of the popular songs are instrumentals and not something we could do. Let’s hope the songwriters get their acts together and write some more for the Andrews Sisters because those sort of songs with the split harmonies suit us to a T.’
Bella sighed and got up to put the kettle on. There’d been no letter from Bobby waiting for her on the doormat, just one from Molly in a fancy pink envelope, and she’d put that on the sideboard until Mam got in from work and they could read it together. It was a pity Bobby hadn’t been posted to a closer airbase; then they at least could have met up occasionally.
She’d bet a penny to a pound that he was meeting up with blooming Alicia from time to time now she was down there. Well, she wasn’t going to waste time crying over him. She’d write him one more letter tonight and if he hadn’t answered her in two weeks then she would put him out of her mind and concentrate on the Bryant Sisters and trying to survive this war in one piece.
She brewed a pot of tea and poured three mugs. ‘Fancy a sarnie?’ she shouted through to the sitting room. ‘We’ve not got much in but there’s a pot of fish paste in the cupboard.’
‘I’ll have one,’ Edie said, but Fran pulled a face.
‘Not for me, thanks. Not keen on fish. Makes me feel sick.’
‘What about tomatoes then? There’s a couple on Dad’s plant by
the back door.’
‘Oh go on then. Put me plenty of salt on though.’
Bella laughed and set to slicing yesterday’s loaf. ‘Do you want a bit of tomato on with your paste, Edie?’
‘Yeah, why not. Let’s live dangerously for once.’
Fran carried the plates of sandwiches through on a tray along with the mugs of tea. ‘We’ll have these and then we’ll get some rehearsing done. I do wish we had a piano. But we’ll manage. We’ve done it before with no one accompanying us. Tuck in.’
On Saturday night, the crowd in the Legion cheered and clapped loudly as the girls took a bow following their first half of the show. Chas Morris saw them offstage and told the audience they’d be back later to finish the evening with a dancing spot. He announced a game of lotto and the ticket seller set up a table and chairs in front of the stage, where a queue formed immediately.
As the girls left their dressing room Chas called them over to a table, where a glass jug of orange squash and three glasses waited. They flopped down on the chairs around the table and Edie poured drinks for them all.
‘God, I needed that,’ Bella said. ‘It’s so warm in here tonight. My throat’s as dry as a bone.’
‘Well done, girls, that was great,’ Chas said. ‘How are things at work? I heard about the other site. Dreadful. Makes you wonder when it’s all going to end.’
Fran nodded. ‘A couple of girls we used to work with were killed. It’s so very sad. They’d volunteered for night shifts there thinking it would help their families out with the bit of extra pay they’d get. And that’s what happens. It’s so unfair.’
‘It is,’ Chas agreed. ‘Well I might have something nice happening for you next weekend. I won’t say anything yet in case it falls through. But just in case, come early to get the sound right. Dress as glamorous as you can afford to and give the performance of your life. I promise you it will be worth it, all being well that Hitler doesn’t wipe us out first. Right, I’ll go and call the lotto numbers and I’ll see you later.’
