“Relax,” he whispered, his husky voice soft and gentle. He touched his finger to her clit, rubbing back and forth in a gentle motion until she begged him with her body to go deeper. He slid his finger inside her with deliberate slowness, taking his time, waiting for her to push him deeper with her hips. She did. Once he’d gone as far as was possible, he pumped his finger in and out, all the while rubbing her clit with his thumb. The clouds opened up, and she saw heaven, pure heaven. Only the streets weren’t paved with gold, they were paved with Zach’s kind eyes and crooked smile, much better than rooms full of gold and designer clothes.
Kelsie tossed her head back and forth on the pillows, so very near to coming, to going to that heaven she’d only glimpsed. An explosion built inside her. One more circular rub of his thumb launched her straight to that heaven at the speed of light—or was that lust? Zach held his finger inside her, waiting until she floated back to earth.
Lost in the haze of an incredible orgasm, Kelsie lay boneless and spent. She’d never experienced such an incredible high and only with a man’s finger. But not just any man. Zach. Proud, stubborn, sexy Zach. And for now, her Zach.
Zach shifted off the bed and shucked off his jeans. He fished a condom out of his pocket, ripped it open with his teeth, and rolled it down over his cock. Turning to her, he pulled down her underwear and discarded it.
His feral grin spread from cheek to cheek, revealing dimples she’d never seen before. He crawled back on the bed, between her legs. He ran his naked body up hers until his chest hair tickled her nipples and his breath fanned her hot cheeks.
“I need you, Kelsie.” He spoke as if asking permission. His voice betrayed the strain of holding back.
He needed her. Her? He needed her? The poor man had no idea what he was getting into.
The lid on her baggage opened a crack, and claustrophobia and panic threatened to escape. No. No. No. She wouldn’t hurt Zach like that again. Kelsie tucked her insecurities back inside, slammed the lid shut, and latched the suitcase. She locked it and threw away the key. With a welcoming smile, she gazed up at Zach, as a woman who’d battled her demons and won. Set free and ready to tackle the next chapter in her life.
“I’m yours,” she said, and she meant it. She touched Zach’s face with her finger, ran it down his stubble. Even though he’d shaved several hours ago, it still darkened his jaw. This was a man. All man. And for now, her man.
Zach pushed her legs apart and guided his cock into the slick, wet opening recently occupied by his clever and talented index finger. He shuddered, closed his eyes for a moment, as if savoring it and filing it away for the future.
She’d bet her beauty-queen crowns the man’s cock was even more clever than his finger. He took it slow, giving her time to adjust to him physically and emotionally. Sure, she’d been with other men before her marriage to Mark, including some older, experienced men, but Zach was different. She didn’t know why, but sometimes words didn’t do feelings justice, even the words in her head.
When Zach’s penis rested inside her fully, the head rubbed against her deepest spaces. She’d never had a man this large or this gentle and caring. Even sweet. He filled her body and he filled her mind and soul. She wrapped her legs around his waist and held him to her, pushing him deeper by adjusting the angle of her hips. He stared down at her, holding himself up by his arms so he didn’t crush her with his large, muscular body. His face reflected deep concern even as she read the tension of holding back emblazoned on the creases around his lips and eyes.
“Fuck me, Zach.”
He nodded, his lips tightened, his eyes hooded. He withdrew, then thrust back inside, with an easy, steady rhythm obviously designed to maintain control over his body. Kelsie didn’t want control. She wanted Zach, the man. She wanted the passion he showed for football directed at her, given to her. She wanted to be more desirable to him than a coveted Super Bowl ring.
Kelsie buried her fingers in his hair and kissed him as if he held the key to eternal youth. Maybe he did. He kissed her back, and the more wildly their mouths mated, the more wildly their bodies followed, until his controlled thrusts exploded into a wild frenzy of thrusting hips and sweaty bodies punctuated by groans from him and whimpers from her.
Kelsie’s body swept her mind into another wild ride, only this time Zach traveled with her. Higher and higher they climbed, like bungee jumpers riding a tram to the top of the cliff, and then they jumped off together, clinging to each other in a moment so intense neither was certain they’d survive, so they held on, determined to make a few seconds last a lifetime. When they hit the end of the cord, they didn’t die but bounded along, drawing out the pleasure, until only a gentle swaying remained.
Zach rolled onto his side, taking her with him, his partially hard cock still inside her. She lay on top of him. Her cheek pressed against his chest, wet from his sweat. She filled her nostrils with the sweet scent of sex, so uniquely theirs. It mingled with the scented vanilla candles burning about the room.
Somewhere inside her, he’d permanently branded his name on her heart.
Chapter 18—Naked Bootleg
They must have fallen asleep, because Kelsie woke to the sound of rain hitting the windows of the old house. Zach stirred next to her. His crooked smile warmed her heart. She reached out to him, kissed his warm mouth, and smiled back.
Drunk with hazy feelings she couldn’t decipher, she needed to explain her earlier behavior.
“Zach, do you still hate me?”
“I don’t think so.”
“But you haven’t forgiven me.”
His lack of response was her answer. She tried not to show her disappointment. What did she expect?
“I am so sorry,” she said, knowing the words were inadequate.
“You had everything, and I had nothing.”
“You think my childhood was wonderful because we had money, don’t you?”
He nodded.
“Well, let me tell you. It was hell. Pure hell.” Kelsie needed to make him understand. She didn’t want him to think the worst of her. “I had to be the best at everything to survive.”
“I can’t imagine it was worse than mine.”
“Not worse, but it wasn’t good either.”
“Tell me why it wasn’t good. What did the poor little rich girl ever have to worry about?”
Kelsie took a deep breath and dredged up a past she’d attempted to bury in her backyard of bad memories and mistakes. “As far back as I can remember, my mother paraded me on stage before judges, made up like an unnatural doll and looking way older than I should have. The consummate beauty-pageant mother, she didn’t allow me to play with other kids—I might get dirty—or to ever appear out of costume down to the heavy makeup that transformed my face into the face of a hooker. My life was constant practice, countless hours of dance lessons, baton-twirling lessons, and beauty makeovers. My weekends were beauty pageant after beauty pageant.”
“What about your father? Where was he in all this?” Zach still held his body away from her, but his accusing gaze softened slightly.
“My father stayed out of it, obviously grateful we weren’t in his hair. Besides, he had his own high expectations. Carringtons do not get bad grades. Carringtons always present themselves with class and dignity. Carringtons aren’t allowed to have human failings. The first pageant I remember losing was at the ripe old age of five years. My mother locked me in my room without dinner, access to a bathroom, or water for twelve hours.”
“No bathroom?” Zach frowned, not looking quite so judgmental anymore.
Kelsie stumbled on before she lost her nerve. She’d never told this to anyone. “When I turned thirteen, Mom declared me too flat and made an appointment for breast implants. Terrified, I ran to my father. It was the first and only time he put his foot down when it came to me. My parents almost divorced over what I secretly called Operation Big Boobs. Instead my mother resorted to buying push-up bras, custom-made. So, yes, I guess I was programme
d from diapers to win at all costs, no matter the price.”
Zach shook his head and rubbed his eyes, as if he couldn’t quite figure out what to do with this information. When he glanced up, he looked so sweet and so confused that Kelsie couldn’t help herself. She ran a finger along his jawline, over his pursed lips. He pulled away, got dressed, and left her alone with her turbulent thoughts and a bucketful of regrets.
~ ~ ~ ~
Zach stared out the window at the rain falling on the bay beyond. His thoughts scrambled with conflicting realities or at least his reality as he’d known it.
When he’d woken in bed with Kelsie after an amazing night of sex, he’d been afraid to open his eyes, to find out it’d all been a dream, an erotic figment of his usually boring imagination. Yet her soft body was sprawled on top of his harder one, melding their sweat-slicked skin together. Soul-deep satisfaction had settled in his bones. No man could imagine this, especially a practical man who rarely left reality behind.
He’d left it behind last night. Not only left it behind but jettisoned it right out of his comfortable galaxy into uncharted territory. He’d always known that one night with Kelsie, the girl of his fantasies, would ruin him for any other woman, and now he was sure it damn well had.
He wanted her, no matter the price, no matter how temporary, no matter how damaged he’d be at the end. He’d make a deal with the devil to keep her for as long as possible. Perhaps he already had.
He wasn’t even sure if he still hated her.
Kelsie ran a delicate hand along the bump in his right collarbone, and he stiffened. He’d been so deep in thought he hadn’t heard her approach. “What happened?”
“Broke it in college.” Her hair brushed against his shoulder, and he breathed in the heady scent of her shampoo and expensive perfume blending with the smell of sex and sweat.
“Have you broken a lot of bones over the years?”
“A few.” Some playing football, some caused by an abusive stepfather.
She planted a kiss on the bump and laid her cheek against his shoulder. “You’re so invincible.”
“Hardly. I wish it were true.” He was a pansy everywhere but the football field and especially when it came to her.
She lifted up and gazed into his eyes, her brows furrowed in the cutest way. He was so screwed. “Zach?”
“Yeah?” He stroked her hair, marveling at how the strands slipped through his fingers.
“Do you think you’ll ever be able to forgive me?”
“I don’t know,” he said honestly.
“I saw the memorial to your brother in the yard.” She stared into his eyes, as if plumbing for his deepest secrets.
He grunted in response, not wanting to pile his personal pain on top of her painful admission.
“I did this. I played a part in this. If I hadn’t insisted, even knowing your brother could be in danger… I’m such a horrible, selfish bitch, and I don’t deserve to breathe the same air as you.”
He turned to her, grinding his jaw. He didn’t want to talk about this. Talking about it made it real again, and he managed to push that unfinished business with her out his mind, yet it was still there.
“Zach?” Her voice sounded tiny, barely above a whisper. Her eyes were earnest and sincere. She was truly sorry, but he didn’t feel any better for it. He was here sleeping with the enemy, even letting go of his hatred, but what she’d done was still there between them.
“Drop it. I don’t want to talk about it. Not now.” Not ever. They were temporary. He was using her to get what he wanted, then he’d dump her like she’d dumped him and walk away knowing he’d finally gotten his revenge and restitution. Yeah, that’s all this was. All it was, beyond their sexual attraction for each other.
She looked crushed, as if he’d just told her an eagle had swooped down and carted off Scranton. “Sorry. I know some things are best left alone.”
“You and I don’t have a future. We have a past that denies us a future. I’m enjoying your body because you offered it to me. That’s all this is and all it’ll ever be. Don’t expect any more from me than that.” His tone was harsh, and she shrank back from him, but he was too angry at himself for being weak and at her for being a temptress.
He had to remember who and what he was dealing with. When it came to Kelsie, he’d been the one to trail after her like a puppy begging for a pat on the head. She’d tossed a few crumbs his way during their high school years just to keep him on the line, to use him when the need arose, to carry her books or stroke her ego or make her latest boyfriend jealous. He’d been nothing to her but a means to an end. Now she was his means to an end. He’d use her and be done with her when the gala was over.
This time he held the cards and the money, and she held nothing.
Except his fragile, confused heart.
~ ~ ~ ~
Trying to concentrate on film had been next to impossible. Zach’s concentration broke several times as his mind drifted to Kelsie’s face and the look in her eyes when he drove her over the edge during sex. For the last few nights, they’d had crazy-assed, rock-his-world sex all night long.
He’d finally given up on watching film about eight thirty and gone home.
Zach stripped off his clothes and hesitated beside the bed in the master bedroom. A smart man would retreat to the spare bedroom, which finally had its own bed.
Kelsie’s arms were wrapped around his pillow. Her little dog snored at the foot of their bed. This was his life for now. With a sigh, he crawled into bed next to her. Immediately, she wrapped her arms and legs around him and clung to him. Zach held her tight, his resolve evaporating like steam from a whirlpool tub.
“Where were you?” The worry in her sleepy voice caused a twinge of guilt.
“Working.” He rose up on one elbow and studied her.
Kelsie bit her lower lip, her gaze slipping to the window and back to him. “I was just lonely. It was so late, and I hadn’t heard from you.”
“I was watching game film. It was damn hard though.” He ran his hand up and down her spine.
“Because of me?” She lifted her head.
“Yeah. The sex between us is fucking fantastic. I’m a man. How can I not be distracted?” He sat up and pulled away from her, unable to think clearly when she rubbed her body against him like that. “We’re halfway through the season. I can’t afford to lose focus. Maybe I should go back to the other bedroom for the rest of the season.”
He rolled to a sitting position and swung his feet to the floor.
Kelsie grabbed his arm with amazing strength and surprising desperation. “Please don’t go.”
A warm feeling settled in his gut. She wanted him here with her. Zach couldn’t deny her. Once the gala was over, she’d leave, and he’d never again know the feel of her silky skin sliding across his rougher skin. Or hear her whimper when he touched just the right spot. Or see her brilliant smile when he made her laugh.
He hated his weakness for her, hated that she only had to say a few words, and he panted at her feet, lovesick fool that he was.
He’d loved her from the minute he’d laid eyes on her in ninth grade, and despite what she’d done to him, he still had feelings for her, even while hating her. No one would dispute his stupidity or his insanity. Especially considering how cruel she’d been to him, yet he kept coming back for more.
But could he forgive her? Could he forgive himself?
But right now, the object of his high school obsession wanted more nights with him, and he couldn’t deny her. He might be a strong guy, but he sure as hell wasn’t that strong.
Fumbling for a condom and putting it on, he rolled back onto the bed and pulled her into his arms. She came willingly, placing one of her longer-than-heaven legs across his body to straddle him. She might be a she-devil in disguise, but he’d gladly burn in damnation for the rest of his life for one more moment with her.
After flipping on the bedside lamp, Kelsie placed her palms on his chest, pushed hi
m back down on the bed, and leveraged her hips over his large dick. “I want to see you.” Her throaty whisper sent a shiver running along his thighs.
He closed his eyes and waited for flesh to meld with pleasure. She lowered herself onto him, sheathing him inside her like an expensive glove made just for him.
Him, and no one else.
When she’d taken him inside fully, he opened his eyes and met her starkly blue ones. Something lingered behind her attempts at bravado, something he couldn’t put a finger on. Could it be regret that she’d sold her soul to this particular devil? Or was something else putting those wrinkles above her pretty brow. He didn’t want to be the one who made her unhappy. He wanted to make her happy, find a way to keep her in his life, regardless of the circumstances.
Not a good situation for a man who prided himself on not needing anyone. The sooner he faced facts and admitted he meant nothing to her but a means to an end, the sooner he could accept the situation and quit trying to read more into it.
Using her arms for support, she lifted herself up and then lowered herself back down, one excruciating inch at a time. And there were a lot of inches, if he did say so himself. She threw back her head, her blond hair a tangle of tawny curls. Then she lowered her head with a feral growl of female satisfaction as she fully seated herself on top of him. Her hair danced across his chest in silken waves, and he groaned the groan of a dying man. What a helluva way to die.
Over and over again.
If he could, he’d convict her of homicide and lock her up in this bedroom to serve out her sentence.
A few more times, she tortured him with sensual slowness. Unable to take it anymore, he grabbed two handfuls of her incredible ass and drove her home. A wild-woman smile dominated her beautiful face. He raised her up and drove her back down. She added her own power to their combined thrusts. She lifted him to ecstasy and took the trip with him, as his orgasm came in wave after incredible wave.
Definitely murder in the first degree.
She collapsed on top of him and soon fell asleep. Zach stared at the ceiling, his mind whirling with how he’d keep himself focused on his goal of winning a Super Bowl.
Offsides: The Originals (Seattle Steelheads Book 3) Page 18
