Pleasing you,
Satisfying you
Is just the beginning of what I would do.
The whole time she read her poem, she looked right at me. I could feel every word that came out of her mouth. She read it with such emotion, such truth. Damn, what was I going to do? I felt like the whole room knew that the poem she was reading was about me.
When she finished reciting the poem, she got off the stage and came back to the table, with a smile on her face. She put her hand on my thigh and asked me what I thought about the performance. I turned around and faced her. Again, she was close enough to kiss. She slipped her hand higher up my thigh and slightly massaged it. I held on to the table while I answered her.
“Why didn’t you tell me that you were going up there?”
She moved her hand up higher, and I could feel her hand pulling aside my underwear.
“I wanted to see if it would make you wet,” she joked, but then again, her hand was now inside my panties and was rubbing my clit.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. What should I do? I knew that I needed to stop her, but this was feeling too good. I spread my legs wider as I looked into her eyes. She just kept licking her lips and working her fingers. I reached under the table and laid my hand on top of hers. I wanted to say something to her, but what?
“I see it worked. It’s a waterfall down there,” she said and smiled as she pulled her hand out of my shorts. Then she stood up.
I didn’t even realize that they had called her back to the stage to sing her latest single. While she was onstage, I went to the bathroom to get myself together. I also needed to powder my nose. Damn. This girl had my head spinning.
* * *
A half an hour later Amira and I were back in the car, heading to dinner. If it were up to me, we would be on our way to finish what she had started in the poetry club. But things hadn’t gone that way. We went to a restaurant she had chosen and ate dinner. After realizing that things had cooled off between us, I felt agitated and just wanted to go back to the hotel. She paid the bill, and once we got outside, I noticed that the limo was gone and all we had waiting for us was a taxi. Of course, this made me stop in my tracks.
“Uh, where’s the limo?”
“Calm down, Tangie. I know that you like to ride in style, but I just wanted to take you somewhere without having someone keeping an eye on us.”
“What about the taxi driver? I’m sure he knows who you are.”
“Don’t worry about it. He’s an old friend of mine. He’s cool. I trust him with my life.”
We got into the taxi, and she handed the driver an envelope that, I later found out, had five thousand dollars in it.
I looked over at her. “So where are we going?”
“Just wait and see. You don’t have a curfew, do you?” she joked.
I sat back and enjoyed the ride. Her friend sparked up, and we all smoked. Amira took in a deep pull and covered my mouth with hers. After pushing the smoke in my mouth, she slipped me her tongue. She kissed me deeply and ran her hands all over my body. Suddenly she stopped kissing me but kept her hands on me.
“Damn, girl. You got me going crazy. Stop the car,” she told her friend.
He stopped on a dark road, and she got out of the car. As soon as I stepped out, she grabbed me and kissed me. She pushed me against the car as she pulled off my belt. Then she pulled away and led me to the front of the taxi. I sat on the hood and pulled off my shorts. The only light out there was from the taxi’s headlights, and it was just enough to let both of us see what we had been fantasizing about. Her friend just sat in the car and watched us, as if what we were doing was done every day.
“You sure you want to do this?” she asked.
I didn’t answer her. I just leaned back so that she could pull off my underwear. She pulled it off while I pulled off my shirt.
There we were, in the middle of trees and darkness, and all I had on was my bra and six-inch thigh-high boots. She leaned on top of me and kissed me. It was a long and hungry kiss. She made a trail with her wet tongue down to my nipples, and I moaned openly. Her fingers rubbed my clit without her slipping any inside me. She licked all over my chest and stomach. She acted as if she knew that I wanted her to taste me, but she was making things move at her own speed.
When her lips finally reached my clit, I thought that I was going to die. Her soft little pink lips rubbed my opening. She had my legs spread and had my boots pointing in the air as she pushed her face into me. First, I felt her tongue slide in and out of me, then up and down on my clit. She nibbled on it lightly as I moved my hips with her tongue. I wanted this feeling to last forever.
The noise of her trying to detach my clit from my body was the only sound that could be heard, so I figured it was okay to let loose. I screamed with heated lust as she ate my pussy with passion. Her hands roamed my body as she worked me with her mouth. As my body jerked and moved around, I almost slipped off the hood of the car, but she picked me up and put me right back on top of it. She went back to work. Minutes later, she pulled her head away and held my lips open. Then she pulled off her shirt and rubbed her hard, perky nipple up and down my clit. Shit, she was doing things to me that I had never even thought of. After doing one nipple, she did the other, then went back down and sucked my clit.
Pulling away never crossed my mind. This was different, it was new, and I loved everything about it. I wanted everything that she was giving. She fucked me with her tongue, and I fucked it back. I loved the feeling of something long, wet, and smooth sliding in and out of me. When she stopped and stood up, I leaned forward so that I could tell her to keep on going, but she put her finger against my lips and shushed me. Then she put her hand on the back of my neck and pushed my mouth toward her nipples. I sucked on them, tasting myself. She leaned her head back and enjoyed my touch. I unbuckled her jeans and pulled them down halfway. I wanted to pleasure her the same way she had pleasured me. I got off the hood of the car and got on my knees in front of her. Before I could do anything, she pulled me back up. She got close to me and whispered tenderly in my ear.
“No, not now. I want you to make sure that you are ready to taste me.”
And with that, she slid two fingers inside me, while I reached down and played with her clit. She fucked me with her fingers better than any man had done with his dick. She thought that she would make me cum before her, but I got to her first. I could feel her body start to tremble as my fingers became really wet from her juices. She closed her eyes, and I could feel her body stiffen as she stopped moving her fingers and came. When she was done, she opened her eyes and had a look of shock on her face. I figured that maybe she wasn’t expecting me to know anything about a woman’s body. I pulled my hands away from her and sat back down on the hood of the car. She put her hand against my chest and pushed my back against the hood. She rubbed her finger down my clit, then put one back inside me. She moved her fingers slowly, getting them really wet. She took them out and ran her fingers up and down my asshole. She put her face back into me and flicked her tongue against my clit real fast.
She kept rubbing my ass, and with the other hand, she finger fucked me. My body shook violently as I screamed her name. I opened my legs as wide as I could and let her give it to me. Even after I came, she kept on going. Her tongue moved from my clit to my ass and back up again. She wasn’t trying to make me cum again; she just couldn’t pull herself away. She loved the taste of me and wanted to savor it. I loved the way she was making me feel, and I didn’t mind letting her continue.
Her friend got out of the taxi and came and stood beside her. He looked down at my bare pussy and smiled. Amira just kept on licking, as if he were still in the car.
“I think that we should get out of here. It’s getting late,” he told her, but she didn’t move, so he just stood there watching.
I also sat up and leaned on elbows to watch as I lifted up and wound my hips.
“Damn, A. You’re turning her ass out already,” the taxi driver sa
id as Amira stood up and pulled up her pants.
She helped me up, and I got dressed. We never made it back to the hotel like we had planned on doing. We ended up at her friend’s apartment for rounds two and three.
Chapter 10
I Know That We Had Sex
And All, But I Am Not Gay
That was some crazy night. I know that some people will never understand why or how I gave into her. I am the snake who is known for always getting her prey. I am the sly one, but I just couldn’t hold back anymore. I wanted her so badly. She gave me these feelings that were driving me mad with lust. Just the way she looked at me made me wet. I never thought that a woman would bring me to such heights of passion, but my God, she drove me damn near to insanity. There was something about her that drew me to her. She was so smooth with her shit. She never had to say too much. Even when we first made love, she never said more than eighteen words. Instead, she did most of the talking with her body, and I understood every word.
I woke up that morning at Amira’s friend’s apartment, wondering what the day held for me. I knew that Tay was going to be pissed. And I also knew that last night was something that I would remember forever. I felt the other side of the bed, unable to look. I was not ashamed. I just had that feeling like when you slept with a friend and you had to face them the next day. I felt around on the bed, and no one was there. I got up and headed to the bathroom to get myself together. When I came out, I saw her friend sitting on the couch in the living room, smoking, and I asked him about Amira’s whereabouts.
“She went to the store. She said to tell you that she will be right back.”
I sat down beside him, and he passed me the blunt.
“Let me ask you something. Are you really feeling A? Or are you just sleeping with her ’cause you need something new in your life?” he said.
I wanted to tell him to mind his fucking business, but he was Amira’s friend. Plus, letting us use his apartment was very nice.
“Why would you ask that? She’s cool and everything but—”
“Cool? That’s all you think of her? I happen to know that she’s really into you, and from what I saw last night, you think more of her than just her being cool.”
I looked at him and really wanted to open up to him. I had been holding back so many things. So many things had run through my mind as far as Amira and I were concerned. I couldn’t even figure out if I was now gay, bi, or just curious.
“Okay, I do think that she is more than just cool. I like her, and I find myself thinking about her all the time. She’s not like any other person I have ever met.”
“So do you think that you want to be with her full-time and not have any other woman or man in your life?”
Man, he was asking hard questions.
“I don’t know about all of that. It’s not like I think of myself as a gay person,” I answered, and it caused him to burst into laughter.
“What do you mean, you don’t think of yourself as gay? I watched you last night, you know? You let a woman go down on you, and you wanted to do the same to her. How can you not call yourself gay? Shit, you have to admit that you’re at least bi.” He did have me there.
“Look, I don’t really know what I am when it comes to this relationship. This is all very new to me. I am with a man that I love, and I am still trying to figure things out with him. Then there’s Amira. I am starting to feel things for her, but I still have to ask myself, can I really be with a woman?”
“I see where you’re coming from, but I think that you should have thought about all of this before you left your man back at the hotel to come and fuck around with her.”
Okay, now he was pushing things way too far. He might be right, but no one talked to me like that.
“Hold the fuck up. You don’t even know me like that. You know nothing about me or what I’m all about. So I really don’t think that it’s your place to say a goddamned thing about what I do!”
He didn’t get mad, nor did he yell back at me. He just took a sip of his drink that was on the coffee table and said, “All I’m saying is that before you get up and do things with people, you should think not only of yourself but of the other person too. Think about it, Tangie. Do you think that it’s easy for A to be in the public eye and not be able to be herself? I remember when she first got picked up by her record label and went to her first big party with her ex-girlfriend. The label made such a big deal about it that it fucked up her relationship.”
“Why didn’t she just go with a guy? I thought that she likes men too?”
“I wouldn’t go as far as to say she likes them. I know that she likes to sleep with men once in a while, but I think that’s about it. But it’s all good, as far as I’m concerned. I don’t know if you know this, but we used to be together back in the day. Then one day she came to me and told me about the feelings she had for women.”
“And how did you take it?” I asked, hoping that I could get some insight into how he reacted when he found out about her being gay.
He took another sip of his drink, then took a deep breath, as if it was his turn to unload what was on his chest.
“At first, I was all into it. I thought that having a girlfriend who’s into other women would bring something extra to our relationship. But too much of a good thing is never good. It got to the point where we were not having sex on our own. The only time she was up to do anything was when we had another woman in our bed. Once I noticed that, I sat her down, and we talked about how I was feeling and how she was feeling about things. So by the end of this conversation, it was like we both were finding out that she was more gay than bi. She still is. And that’s why I think that we are friends today. She told me the truth when she found out her truth.”
He had just laid some serious shit on me. Hearing how things had turned out with him and Amira gave me hope for Tay and me.
“So after that talk with her, your relationship just ended abruptly?” I asked, fascinated by his story.
“Well, she would still come around here and there and hit a nigga off with some ass. But I mostly think that she came around because we have that love for each other. I was the first man that she was ever with, you know?”
I just sat there and listened to him talk. He looked like he had spaced out while talking about her. I could understand how he was feeling. Amira had me feeling like that too at times.
“This is why I want you to think things through before she falls too deep into this, Tangie. I know her. She loves too hard. It’s hard enough that she has to hide who she is. I just don’t think that she needs the added stress that this can end up giving her. She is never good under pressure. And from what she has told me, she is really feeling you, and I just don’t want her to get hurt.”
Now my mind was spinning. I had to be honest with myself. Was I really the right person for her? I had a gut feeling that I would end up hurting her, and I didn’t want to do that. The biggest question that lingered in my mind was whether I could stop myself from sleeping with her or seeing her. I knew for damn sure that I was not going to be able to stop wanting her, so how was this going to work?
As these thoughts ran through my mind, Amira walked into the apartment and made my heart melt. She put down her bag, walked over, and sat on my lap. She pushed my hair out of my face and kissed my lips. I wanted to pull away—God knows I did—but I couldn’t. I looked into her eyes, and I saw love. She smiled at me, and I could feel her happiness. I looked over at her friend, and his eyes were begging me to do the right thing. I couldn’t take this anymore, and it made my eyes water. She leaned in and kissed me again, and I could feel her love through her lips. This made me pull away. I couldn’t let her see the tears in my eyes, so I pushed her back on the couch and went into the bathroom.
Before I closed myself in there, I told her that I wanted to go back to the hotel, to Tay’von. She looked confused. She looked over at her friend, hoping that he could tell her what had just gone down. But he looked away from
her, not wanting to see what was in her eyes. She turned back to me and, sad and confused, answered me in a low tone.
“Okay, Tangie. We can go back to the hotel. We can do whatever you want.”
On the ride back to the hotel, I didn’t utter a word. I sat as far from her as possible, not wanting to feel even a flicker of the fire that had burned between us the night before. At times I caught her friend glancing back at us in his rearview mirror with sadness in his eyes for his good friend. But the pain that I was sure to make her feel would hurt both him and her even more if I hadn’t pulled away. I was poison to anyone who got close enough to lick, sniff, or fuck me. I liked her too much to subject her to that much agony, at least I was hoping so.
When I got back to the hotel, I stepped out of the taxi and rushed into the lobby. I looked back before stepping onto the elevator and saw Amira and her friend talking to each other. Neither of them could figure me out, but in that moment, I couldn’t figure myself out, either.
* * *
I stood in front of my suite door, not knowing what Tay’von was going to do to me once he saw me. I didn’t have enough time to come up with anything, so I just walked in and winged it. As soon as I walked in, all eyes were on me. Everyone was up in there, and he even had some bitches that I had never seen before lying around like they belonged there.
“Look who decided to bring her ass back to the hotel,” Tay’von said as he staggered his drunken ass over to me. “Where the hell have you been all goddamned night? It’s eleven o’clock in the morning, and you’re just walking in here? What do you have to say for yourself, Tangie?”
I didn’t answer him, because I really didn’t have anything to say. I just stood there looking at him, as if he was the one who had done wrong.
“You think that I’m playing with your ass, don’t you? How am I supposed to be your man, yet you leave for a whole night, and I don’t even know where you’re at? That’s some real disrespectful shit, Tangie.”
The Art of Deceit Page 12
