by Tillie Cole
“Club business, Sia. You know that.”
I stared out along the bubbling stream. “I was in Louisiana this past week.” Ky looked at me, a puzzled look on his face. “I met Crow.”
“Okay,” he said slowly.
“I need to tell you a few things. And I’m kinda going behind Hush and Cowboy’s backs here to tell you. But I want you to know. I want you to understand why Hush is the way he is. Why he’s so broken.” Ky licked his bottom lip, turning to stare out at the stream. But I knew he was listening to my every word. “And there’re some things about the New Orleans prez I think you should know about.”
His eyebrows pulled down as I started telling him about Hush and Cowboy. How they met, what happened to Hush’s parents, how he never got a chance at goodbye, and why he never let the Hangmen truly be his family. Then I told him about Titus, what he did to Hush in the past and then only a few days ago. And what I heard Crow and Hush telling Cowboy when I wasn’t supposed to be listening.
When I finished, Ky was a statue on the bank. I sighed, feeling the heaviness of everything we’d gone through lift off my shoulders. “If you send him away for something as stupid as falling in love with me . . .” Ky snapped his head to me. “They love me,” I whispered. “And I love them so much.” I gave him a wry smile. “It’s the first time any of us have truly felt it, Ky. I’m . . .” I thought of Maddie. “I’m at peace now. With them. I’m finally happy, and I’ve found peace.”
I stood up and brushed the dried dirt from my jeans. Ky waited a few minutes more, no doubt thinking shit through. Then he got his feet. I went to walk to his bike, when he grabbed my arm and yanked me to his chest. I grunted in surprise, but then I felt my heart melt as Ky’s big arms went around me and squeezed me tight. I felt tears start to form, only worsening when he kissed the top of my head and rasped, “I wouldn’t have fucking coped if Garcia had stolen you away from me.”
The sincerity lacing his deep voice cut through me. I held on to Ky with all I had. “I love you,” I whispered and meant every word.
“Love you too, sis.” He gripped on to me for a few seconds more.
When we parted, I was sure I saw his eyes glistening, but as we got on the bike, I couldn’t tell if I’d imagined it or not. I wrapped my arms around his waist. “Wanna go for a real ride?” he asked.
I smiled, feeling like the kid sister I really was. “Yeah.” I held on tight as we hit the open road. I didn’t know if it was a sign from above, maybe from my momma, but I felt a stillness settle in me that I hadn’t ever felt before. And I knew it was because her two babies had found their way back to each other. With that thought in my head, I closed my eyes as the city lights of Austin whizzed by . . . and I just held on.
*****
I walked into the apartment to find Cowboy stretched out on the couch. He got to his feet and came straight to me. He lifted me in his arms and clutched me to his chest. “Missed you, cher,” he said into my hair.
I laughed. “I was only gone an afternoon.”
Cowboy put me down. He laid a hand on his chest. “Cher, that’s way too long for me to be without you,” he said in his best dramatic accent. I laughed in his face.
“You’re so full of shit,” I said and pressed my mouth against his. Cowboy groaned, his hands gripping my waist. He may have been joking before, but this kiss showed me he’d meant every word. When he broke from my mouth, we were breathing fast. I felt his hard dick against my thigh. I swallowed. I looked up and saw Hush over Cowboy’s shoulder. He was fresh from the shower, watching us as he leaned against the doorway. A towel was loosely wrapped around his waist, his toned tattooed body on show. Drops of water ran over his abs and disappeared under the waistline of his towel.
Cowboy had moved, his mouth on the back of my neck. My eyes stayed on Hush’s, the ice-blue of his irises narrow around his dilated pupils. Cowboy’s warm breath sent shivers down my spine. My skin burned with heat. I clenched my thighs together just to find some kind of fucking relief.
Hush slowly lifted his hand out to me. “Go to him,” Cowboy whispered. My feet obeyed, crossing the kitchen until I wrapped my hand in Hush’s. As always, he stared down at the joined fingers. But before, I’d seen fear on his face, anxiety about the different colors and what that could mean for us. As if his past would spontaneously erupt into the present. Now, when he looked at our fingers—white and brown—I saw only love and affection in his stare. I knew there would always be a part of him that would worry. But I hoped the happy years ahead would slowly break down his fears.
I moved closer to Hush, my free hand running down his pecs and abs. Another drop of water ran down his chest. Leaning in, I licked the drop with my tongue. Hush hissed and cradled the back of my head with his hand. I looked up, our eyes colliding, and he crashed his mouth to mine. I moaned, breathless as his tongue slipped in to meet mine. He took my mouth, hard and fast, yet so incredibly sweet at the same time. I moaned louder when two more hands slipped around my waist. Cowboy’s mouth kissed along the side and back of my neck. My eyes fluttered at the feeling of so much affection. I reached behind me to find Cowboy naked. My hands ran over his cut hips and muscular thighs. Cowboy pushed his hips against my ass, pushing me toward Hush, who was hard too. I broke from his mouth and gasped for air.
Cowboy guided me forward, toward the bedroom. My hands found the towel around Hush’s waist just as my mouth found his lips again. We were a sea of mouths and hands and skin as we entered the bedroom. I had barely taken a breath when Cowboy lifted my top over my head. Hush unbuttoned my jeans; he dropped to his knees as he pulled them down and off my feet, dragging my panties with them. Cowboy’s hands made quick work of my bra . . . and then I was bare, scars and all . . . and I had never felt more beautiful in my entire life.
“Je t’aime,” Cowboy whispered into my ear as his mouth ran over the length and breadth of my neck. I lifted my hands above my head and wrapped them around Cowboy’s neck. I cried out as Hush’s tongue began trailing up my thighs, moving closer to the center. Cowboy held my wrists as Hush parted my legs and licked along my pussy. “Hush!” I shouted and arched my back, giving myself to him. I broke a hand from Cowboy’s hold and moved it behind me until the backs of my fingers ran over the length of his cock. Cowboy groaned into my ear, pushing himself against my palm. I gripped him softly, stroking the length up and down.
My eyelashes fluttered, trapped between the two men who had stolen my heart. Heat raced over my body like wildfire. I gripped Cowboy’s hair as my other hand worked him slowly, building him gently. His teeth nipped at my neck, my shoulder, my ear.
Hush lifted one of my legs and placed it over his shoulder, opening me up further to his mouth. I’d barely taken a breath before he was back, tongue lashing at my clit, his finger pushing inside me. I screamed as the sensation of their touches everywhere on my body overwhelmed me. Cowboy groaned in my ear. Hush groaned as he licked me between my legs. Pressure gathered in my thighs. I closed my eyes and lost myself to the feel. When Cowboy’s hands circled me to find my breasts, that was all it took for me to burst apart. Flames and heat and steam seemed to pour from me as Hush took every moan I had to give him.
My legs buckled. Cowboy lifted me, placing me on the bed before I fell, two big bodies plastered to my sides. Mouths took a nipple each, neither giving me a second of reprieve. But I craved it, needed their mouths and their hands caressing my skin. Everywhere, owning me, telling me who I belonged to. I felt hands move to my pussy, rolling over my clit. I didn’t know who it was, and I didn’t care. Like this, this free in bed, we were one. I climbed higher and higher until I shattered apart again. I kicked my legs, unable to take any more.
Lips descended on mine. I didn’t need to open my eyes to know it was Hush. Their lips felt different. Their tastes unique. Hush broke from my mouth, only for Cowboy to take his place. I rolled away from Cowboy, moving to my knees. Cowboy moved behind me, his hands rubbing over my lower back. “Gonna taste this pussy,” he said, voice husky. I moved ove
r Hush, his blown ice-blue eyes watching like I was a gift he struggled to get used to having in his life.
I felt the exact same about him.
About them both.
I bent down and took hold of Hush’s length. I kissed the tip, rolling my tongue around its head. Keeping my eyes fixed to Hush’s, I took him into my mouth as Cowboy ran his tongue along my clit. I cried out as Hush rolled his hips, wrapping his hand in my hair.
“Älskling,” he murmured, over and over again. “Älskling, älskling, älskling . . .”
I took and took from him until he pushed my head away. His cheeks were red and his breathing was labored. I pressed my forehead to his thigh as Cowboy tasted me, as he licked me and licked me until I couldn’t speak, couldn’t think. His finger entered my pussy, making me lose my mind. Then when another moved to my ass and slipped inside, I broke apart. I fell on Hush, feeling his protective arms wrapping around me and pulling me against his chest. He peppered kiss after kiss over my face. “I love you,” he murmured, bringing tears to my eyes. There was no more hiding behind stoic silences. His words were freely given and so fucking welcome to my heart.
I’d barely had time to open my eyes when Cowboy parted my legs, sitting me up slightly. Hush reached between us, keeping his eyes on me, and placed himself at my entrance. There were no condoms now. There was no need. I was it for them, and they were it for me. I choked on a cry as Hush began to fill me. Cowboy’s hand ran down my spine, leaving a track of fire in its wake.
Hush groaned, running his thumb over my bottom lip when he was fully seated. Needing to feel the delicious fullness of Hush, I rocked my hips, goosebumps breaking out over every inch of my skin. I heard a bottle opening. Then I felt cool liquid on Cowboy’s fingers as he pushed them into my ass. My lips parted when I felt him enter me. Hush held still, keeping me in place, letting me feel every moment with his best friend. No selfishness. No jealousy. Just love.
“Cher,” Cowboy groaned, his hands on my hips. I cried out when he filled me completely. His chest was flush against my back. I turned my head, and Cowboy captured my mouth in a soft kiss. Hush moved first, then in an alternate rhythm, so did Cowboy. There was no time to catch my breath. No break, just feeling after feeling of such an impossible high that I never wanted to come back down to earth. I was passed between mouths, lips swelling and tongues tingling as deep kisses were given without condition.
I was adored.
I was worshipped.
I was made to feel worthy.
I whimpered as I felt I couldn’t take anymore. My skin was slick with sweat, slipping like butter between two heavy, ripped bodies. Caged by the two men I loved. Two men who went to the ends of the earth to save me. Risked their lives so they could have me.
The pace increased, breaths coming hard. My pussy and ass started to tighten, ripping rabid groans from both of my men. My arms shook, my hands on the mattress on either side of Hush weakening as the pleasure built. “It feels too good,” I murmured, my voice breaking on a cry. “I’m . . .” I gasped, searching for air. “I’m coming,” I yelled and then stilled, Hush and Cowboy quickening their rhythms as I splintered apart. Two low groans sounded one after the other, then I was filled with warmth, such heat that I felt alive with flames. Hush’s and Cowboy’s grips on my body tightened as they groaned and breathed, coming within me.
I collapsed on Hush. He threaded his hands through my hair, keeping me close to his damp skin. I breathed and breathed until my racing heart began to slow. Cowboy curved around my back, his hands over my waist.
A comfortable silence reigned, wrapping around us like a cocoon. Like I had said to Hush in Louisiana, within these walls, there was no shit talk from anyone about how we loved. No judgment or censure.
This world was ours. Our very own bit of heaven, here on earth.
Breaths evened out, but I knew none of us were asleep. Hush and Cowboy were still stroking my body. They never left me alone, one or both always holding me or kissing me or running their fingers along my skin. I didn’t know such a love could exist. And I had no idea what I’d done to deserve it, but I would never take it for granted. We’d all walked a dark road to get to this place of light.
I smiled, body heat surrounding me. I closed my eyes, content to just be . . . then Hush, with his fingers in my hair, said, “The first whore I ever screwed was at the Hangmen, when we were prospects in New Orleans.” I opened my eyes and took a deep breath. Hush was opening up again. He’d done it frequently over the past few days. Every time he did, I felt another weight lift from his shoulders. When he’d exorcised whatever clawed to be free from his soul, more smiles would grace his face. More laughs would spill from his lips.
And more of my heartbeats would skip.
“I . . . I couldn’t do it.” He let out a self-deprecating laugh. “I was fucking racked with worry about my seizures. Panicked that I might have one mid-fuck and then the prez would find out and kick me the fuck out.”
I kissed his hot skin. “Go on.”
Hush sighed. “Cowboy found out, of course. He knew something was wrong and wouldn’t fucking shut up until I cracked and told him.” He laughed, this time for real. “And just like the Cowboy we all know and love, he picked a slut who’d been eye-fucking him all night and dragged me into the room with him. The whore was down for it.” He shook his head. “I was fucking dumbstruck. But . . .” He sighed. “I did it. Managed it. And at the time, to my eighteen-year-old self, it was like a personal victory.” I held him tighter, reaching down to take Cowboy’s hand in mine. I brought it to my mouth and thanked him with a kiss.
“I was never able to do it again after that. It was my cross to bear. But again, Cowboy knew it, and never let me fly solo.”
Cowboy shrugged against my back. “The more the merrier,” he quipped. But I knew it really was because he was a good man. And no one would ever find a greater friend than him.
Selfless. Cowboy was the most loyal person I’d ever met.
“I’m glad.” I nestled closer. “Because it brought you both to me. And I would never have been able to choose between you.”
Cowboy moved over me and kissed my cheek. “You’ll never have to.”
I looked up at Hush. His eyes shone with happiness. “You never will.”
I wasn’t sure what the future held for us, but as I held two hands in mine, hands that were scarred, bruised, yet filled with so much light, I knew it was going to be our kind of perfect.
Because it would be lived . . . together.
Chapter Sixteen
Hush
“Get on, cher.”
I waited on my bike as Sia climbed on behind Cowboy. I couldn’t wait to have her on the back of my bike, but until my epilepsy was under control, I didn’t wanna risk it. I even went to see Rider. Spoke to the ex-brother. He was training to become a real doctor now at UT, not just one his cult made him into. He pointed me in the right direction. Now I was on new meds I already felt better. But until I knew I had a real grip on my epilepsy, I wasn’t gonna have Sia with me.
Soon enough. She’d ride with me soon enough.
As if guessing what was going through my mind, she reached out her hand. I took it, and she gave mine a squeeze.
“Ready to hear what the verdict is?” Cowboy asked.
I inhaled deep, and then nodded my head. Ky had called yesterday. They were holding church today, voting if we got to stay with the club or not. I wasn’t quite sure what the fuck I’d do if they voted us out. But as I let my gaze find Sia and Cowboy, my brother making her laugh at something he’d said, I knew I’d somehow be okay.
“Ready?” I asked. Cowboy nodded, and we rolled out of the apartment complex. I drank in every bit of the passing scenery on the way to Hangmen HQ, just in case the verdict came back negative.
I fucking loved Austin. Louisiana would always be where I was from, but my home was now here, in the Lone Star State. Sia had told me over and over, whenever my demons came calling to taunt me about our rela
tionship, that Austin was a fucking liberal hippie haven. No one gave a shit about interracial couples, or in our case, threesomes.
And she was right.
It was fucking home.
Cowboy rode beside me, Sia holding onto his cut. I looked at her leather jacket. I wanted nothing more than to see a cut on her back, “Property of Hush and Cowboy” stitched on the back. My dick got hard just thinking about that. Someone to call my own. Something I thought I’d never get in this life.
We entered the miles and miles of Hangmen land and came to a stop at Lilah’s house. Sia was seeing her sister-in-law while her brother and almost-brother decided our fate. Sia slipped from Cowboy’s saddle and pulled him in for a kiss.
I saw all the old ladies come out of Lilah’s house, waiting for Sia. It would be the first time anyone from the club had seen us all together. Sia broke from Cowboy and came to me. She smiled, fucking destroying my heart. She took my hand and then pressed her lips to mine. I put my hand on the back of her head and kept her on my mouth.
Sia sighed and reluctantly pulled away. “I love you,” she whispered. “Now, go see my brother.”
Sia walked into the house. Lilah waved. I gave her a wave back, and then looked at Cowboy. “You ready?”
Cowboy winked. “Always.”
We rode up to the clubhouse. The place was a ghost town. Ky had told us to go straight to church. We passed through the empty bar and onward to meet our fate. I knocked on the door.
“Get the fuck in!” Ky’s familiar voice shouted.
Cowboy’s hand came down on my shoulder. I took a deep breath and walked in the door. I frowned when I only saw Ky and Styx, sitting in their usual seats. “Sit the fuck down,” Ky ordered and pointed to our places at the table.
We sat down. Cowboy threw a side-glance my way. I was just as confused. Ky glared at us, Styx not looking much better. Eventually, Ky leaned forward, arms on the table, and said, “It ain’t against club rules to fuck another brother’s sister,” he snarled. “But it’s fucking bad taste, in my book.” Ky flitted his hard eyes between me and Cowboy. “Bad enough it was one of you fuckers, but the fact that it’s two of you really pisses me the fuck off.” Ky clenched his fists.
