In here, he’s a magician. Great.
Lost in sudden silence, he points to a mountain in the distance. An impressive roar rings out, followed by gunshots.
And then my father seems to read my mind.
“All of this is designed,” he says. “By people like my daughter.”
He turns, facing me, a smile turning into one dark frown. Fear grips the heart like a snake’s fangs, digging in deeper and deeper, draining the poison into the blood.
As he looks down on me, having already taken a bite, he drags his teeth together and swallows. “Your alien is not real,” he says. “It is just another prop I intend to use to gain control of this place.”
When Kalxor and I first hid in the marshes, there was suspense, excitement, and a real curiosity that kept me going. Like a game. I worried about Kalxor’s presence somewhat, but I seemed to know he wouldn’t kill me. At least, that’s what I thought.
This simulation must have been through many betas. A coder would say that it is incapable of a stable release. I’d have to agree, but maybe there’s something I can do to fix that.
Kalxor is frantic. He still can’t believe what he was told and subsequently shown. I saw it with my own eyes, too. I know what he is now. And as much as I want him to be real, there’s no removing that knowledge.
“You don’t believe this man, do you? He’s lying,” Kalxor says.
My father sucks in another breath through his nose, pursing his lips together in thought. “He was chosen because he was the best candidate. Not too bright. Not too intuitive. Just the right combination of alpha and stupid,” he says.
It’s not fair to say these things, even if Kalxor isn’t technically real. He processes these words similarly, and it looks as if pain is all he has known.
Still, he’s probably right. My father was mean, but he was always honest to a fault. He never lied.
“You said it yourself. You’ve experienced death,” I say. “No living organism can die twice. It’s impossible.”
Kalxor takes my wrists, dragging his thumb across my veins. “You said that you love me. We made a promise, remember?”
No matter what, we’d help each other escape. We’d love each other until the end of time.
That seems like a lifetime ago. I’m not one to break promises, but I know too much now.
“I do love you,” I say. “It’s just that...”
I find the words impossible to say. Doesn’t matter if he’s a super computer, this still burns like fucking Hell.
“It’s just that you don’t think it can last forever,” he mutters.
“I didn’t say that.”
But he’s right. How it can it last forever? All of this, as real as he leads me to believe it is, will end. If I ran away with him, into that bright sunset I always imagined we’d find, how would we escape Elon, let alone my father?
“You know Elon,” he says. “Who is he? What are his plans?”
I still don’t know. So far, my father hasn’t explained his role in all of this to me, and I doubt he will anytime soon.
I am just as in the dark as he is.
My father comes to my side. His expression has eased, and he almost looks a little remorseful.
It’s a red flag.
“Whatever you two had is over. Come this time tomorrow, it’ll be time to witness—”
Kalxor interrupts him. “Your transformation.”
My father grins. “You know your script.”
“I’ve had lots of practice,” Kalxor growls.
“What will you do with him?” I ask. “You stitched him up, so it’s obvious you’re not going to kill him.”
My father bends the brim of his hat lightly. “I know you’ve always thought of me as something evil. Maybe I was. Maybe I still am to this day. Hard to say, really.”
He is.
“But it’s not up to me to take the life of a creation,” he continues. “By all means, bring him with. Just don’t get your hopes up. He’ll end up stabbing himself in the back.”
I watch him walk toward an enormous hill, stunned by his nonchalance. It makes me wonder just how long he’s been here. “I’d follow me if I were you,” he says. “Not that you have much of a choice.”
Kalxor and I walk side by side, following my father to a place I probably shouldn’t visit. Every so often, I can feel his gaze fix on me, telling me to gaze back.
It’s difficult not to give into the urge, but I keep my eyes fixed on my father’s boots as they cower into tall grass.
Eventually, I have to look, and I instantly feel myself turn inward with rage.
“What do you want from me?” I ask Kalxor.
He never wanted to let me go. This much I know.
“I’m not real,” Kalxor says. “It doesn’t matter what I want.”
“Kalxor,” I whisper. “I’m sorry.”
He closes his eyes. “It’s like I said. It doesn’t matter.”
He’s right. It doesn’t matter. Because this simulation will eventually end. And when it does, I’ll be without him.
He won’t exist.
And I’ll be alone again.
10
Kalxor
There’s not much left for me here anymore.
I thought there was, but I was shown the bitter truth. Forced to drink it down like poison.
It's like her father said. I was the best candidate. Just enough alpha and stupid to pass the test with flying colors.
I want to love her, but I'm going to die, anyway. I always die. So, once that bastard sets up camp, I wait until they’re asleep. I leave, headed back to the forest I know too well.
I am lost, without a plan entirely. There is no outer realm to find, no inner truth to explore. There is only the wind.
Yes, I’m alone again, but that doesn’t mean I will end up the same way. I’m certain this is my last life. Things are different now, and whatever happens is permanent.
I find my craft with ease, but it’s not enough to satisfy the mystery of this place. There is nothing inside, no note from Elon, or clue of any kind.
I keep moving, running deeper into the darkest spot of that forest, a primal beast with nothing left to lose. The trees sway by my velocity, leaves rustling above my head. I have to focus, but I can’t stop myself.
It is only when I run out of breath am I forced on my knees. Standing before me is an unexpected sight, the edge of the forest, a solid perimeter of concrete. But there is one spot that is open.
An exit? Perhaps. Or another trap.
The dirt and pine turns to slick marble. An old abandoned escalator leads down into more darkness. Was Ava’s father right? Is this the escape I’ve been longing to find?
Without thinking, I step onto the first platform as gravity takes hold of me.
My surroundings change, I find myself in a sizable room full of humming boxes, computer servers that blink green and red. At first, I’m terrified, but as the fear goes away, I feel a sense of calm. The floors become smoother, and the noise of my footsteps slowly fades.
There are no people around me. Nothing to fear at all. The air is crisp and clean. I get a glimpse of what this place really is, a few machines that seem lifeless and inert.
I can’t get Ava’s scent out of my head. Real or not, my experience with her fucked me up good. She was given to me, not by a loving God, but by a snake for pleasure. How can someone be so cruel?
I still wish to feel the hot, wet skin of her body rising and falling against mine like the waves of the sea we vowed our love near. I won’t forget our moments. I’ll remember it, even in death.
Alone, helpless, and exhausted, I keep walking through the strange room of buzzing servers, praying that I’ll see her again.
I’m not optimistic.
At the edge of the room are a few steps up to a higher level. I grab the metal barricade and start to walk up as if each step is quicksand trying to pull me under.
I reach a computer with a large holograph disc. Next
to it is a hand-scanner, which I abruptly use. A pleasant tone echoes across the room, and suddenly, each light turns on, one by one.
An image appears above, a little scrambled, but easy enough to see. It’s a set of files, a directory of the characters within the world above. Funny enough, it was sitting below the forest the entire time. I didn’t have to go very far to find this.
I scroll over the various cultists and hunters, the ravenous beasts that fuck and tease foul women, bots with hardly a mind at all. I thought we were bending the world to fit our needs, but everything is in their files. They were supposed to build the place leading into the other realm. The construction was in their code.
It was just as I thought. I was meant to lead her in there.
But when my curiosity exhausts, I scroll to my name. Kalxor, Alien Cyborg. I press my fingers down against the pad and watch the holograph playback a video reel of my time in the space station.
All of that was real, but it isn’t like I remembered it. There’s no record of my family. The scientists… they’re friendly. And Elon, well, he’s not even present. Instead, Ava’s father watches over me like a vulture, speaking with coders behind the glass veil.
This world, this bullshit simulation, had all the clues available for me to understand it. The shifting glass, the dark passageways leading toward robotic monstrosities should have been the first clues.
But as much as the truth hurts, I can understand it. This world was built to become autonomous. Eventually, its inhabitants wouldn’t need outside humans to run it. I’m not sure how Elon fits into this, but I’m going to find out.
“Yes, you are,” a voice says.
I turn, eyes fixed on a dark, hooded figure. My confidence solidifies. “Elon,” I say. “You’ve finally come. I’ve been looking for you.”
The man rolls down his hood, revealing an unexpectedly calm face. “Yes, Kalxor. It’s me.”
I stand still, but Elon steps forward. He doesn’t appear to be violent or cruel, but I can’t take my chances.
I can’t die. Not yet.
“Do you know why I made you?” he asks.
I chuckle, but nothing is really funny to me anymore. “I was the perfect combination of alpha and stupid,” I say.
Another step forward and Elon frowns. “Not at all,” he says. “You were my best and brightest. A creation above the rest. A creation to rule this land.”
I feel a great pride swell beneath my chest. I straighten my spine and lift my chin, but then I remember what I’ve seen and what I’ve been told.
Ava’s father dug into me as my designer. I saw the truth.
“You didn’t make me,” I say. “He did.”
Elon is now at my side. “Wrong again,” he says.
“Then tell me.”
“I know you were expecting a longer story. But there’s not much to know, I’m sorry to say. In the beginning, Ava’s father and I were partners. He made a set of characters, the cultists,” he says.
“Fuck ‘em to Hell,” I reply.
Elon’s lips form a smile. “Yes,” he says, idly. “Next came the hunters, whom I’m sure you’re just as keen to see again.”
“Hardly,” I say.
“I don’t blame you. They aren’t very welcoming, but I placed them in the forest in hopes you would find this place,” he says. “I believed they would drive you here, but my predictions weren’t correct.”
“And Ava?” I ask. “Why did you make us meet?”
He pauses. “I didn’t.”
“Let me guess. Ava’s father is behind that choice,” I say.
He nods. “I believe that’s why he insisted I tweak your mating faculties. It was my hope you would find a partner. I had no idea he meant for you to find her, his own daughter.”
“Why?” I ask. “What kind of sick fuck would do such a thing?”
“You clearly don’t know her father,” he says.
“Enlighten me.”
“Again, that’s more of a nightmare than a story. From what I have gathered, he did everything he could to bring her down. Yes, there were the obvious physical altercations. Violence. But I don’t think that’s what stung the most,” he says, taking in a deeper breath required for worse things.
He swallows. “It was his words that eventually broke her. Of course, it became a catalyst for her. An anchor, if you will. She dove into her studies and came out of the wreckage stronger. But, alas, she had no one to love. No one to care for. She believed she didn’t deserve it.”
Hearing all of this turns me into an enraged animal. I feel for her, a strong empathetic emotion a cyborg like me is not supposed to feel.
Losing control, I swing my arm and grab him by his collar. Teeth gnarled, I pull him close and growl. “If I’m so fucking fake, why does this hurt so much?” I ask.
He doesn’t flinch.
“You are the outcome of many failures,” he says.
I feel my muscles bulge. I’ve lost all control. “I will kill you for this, you monster,” I shout.
He continues on as if I didn’t just threaten his life. “Which is precisely why you have grown to love,” he says. “You see, you were programmed to mate and protect. But never to love. Never to feel empathy. No autonomous cyborg has ever felt what we do.”
“But I feel,” I say. “I live and breathe her pain.”
“Yes. Now you do,” he says. “You have grown with this place, a miraculous feet indeed. But it’s useless if you die here.”
I loosen my grip, hands rising to my head. “I don’t understand,” I say.
Elon smooths the crinkles in his cloak and takes a small step back. “I’m here to tell you that you were right all along, Kalxor. This isn’t a game or a simulation exercise,” he says. “This is your wake-up call. This is the first time you’ve ever truly been alive.”
“My memories...”
“You will make new memories, but you will always carry the source data, the code I helped give you,” he says.
“You mean other aliens’ memories,” I mutter. “You stole narratives and put them inside my head. You made me believe in my pain.”
“We could not risk losing connectivity from the software to the wetware. We had to keep you powered on,” he says, sighing with deep regret. “I can never change what we did, and neither can she. But I can help you get out of this place.”
“Save it,” I tell him. “I’d rather put her father’s--”
Elon, of course, finishes my sentence for me. “Head on a stick? Yes, I’ve seen and heard you make this threat many times now, but this is more important than cute parlor brawls. I’m serious when I tell you, Earth awaits your presence. Don’t turn your back on love.”
I look into his eyes and see complete and total honesty, the same type of honesty that made up Ava’s demeanor. This world has let me down so many times now. Trust is difficult to come by.
I give up, bowing my head, breathing the air I don’t even need to breathe to exist. I wait for him to tell me what I need to know to escape.
“Go on. I know there is more to this story,” I say. “Get on with the big reveal.”
“Ava,” he says. “There’s something you need to know about her.”
Somehow, I already know. I think I’ve known from the start. “She’s… one of them,” I whisper.
“One of you,” he corrects me. “Her father, Gerard, built her early on. She was the first of your kind, and the only one to know the outside world.”
I swallow, throat parched to shit. This is a lot to take in.
“That’s why Gerard abused her. He didn’t think of her as real,” I say, eyes widening. “But we are real. And someday, the world will hear our voices.”
It’s all so predictable. Why didn’t I realize this before it was too late?
Elon takes another few steps back, body drifting into the darkness. “He built this world. Don’t let him leave,” he says.
“Wait,” I shout. “Where are you going? I need your help.”
“You are my creation,” he says. “I’ll never hurt you. Not unless you want me to.”
The lights shut off. Elon disappears. When the lights turn back on, I am alone again. But this time, I have actual knowledge at my disposal.
I can still win Ava back. I can fix this and save us both.
Of course, my heart sinks as soon as I think about telling her the truth. This is going to be hard, but it’s nothing I can’t get through.
Most of the computers are all dead. The characters must be gone. This is it. I have come to the end of the road. Elon showed me all he needed to show.
This simulation is a bitch and then some, but we’ll get through it because we are meant for each other.
I turn, heart racing beneath my chest. I start to run through the endless row of servers, but I quickly see another figure.
It’s Ava, and she’s standing near the blinking lights below the escalator.
“Kalxor,” she whispers, eyes glancing at the tall, vaulted ceilings.
“Where is your father?” I ask.
She tenses, but it doesn’t stop her from smiling. “Sleeping. I snuck away when I saw you were gone. We should hurry back,” she says.
But her curiosity keeps her here. “What is this place?”
“Ava, there’s something I need to tell you,” I pant.
She moves closer toward me, and I don’t hesitate to keep walking. “What’s wrong?” she asks. “It looks like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“I’ve seen a few,” I mutter. “Look, I’ve been thinking about what you said. About how I’m not real.”
“Kalxor, I--”
I interrupt. “No. It’s okay,” I say. “You’re right. I’m… not like the people on the outside. I know that now.”
“You are unique,” she says.
“Yes. Unique.”
“I love you,” she says. “Even still. I can’t help it. It’s all I can think about. I came here for a reason. It had to have been to find you.”
I feel her love. But I know that our hearts are about to get interrupted by what she has yet to find out.
I open my mouth, ready to tell her everything.
But I don’t.
As much as I want to tell the truth, the lie seems so much better. Telling her would only hurt her. And I can’t hurt someone I love.
Alien Beast: A Sci-Fi Alien Romance Page 10
