by Tijan
"What just happened?" Adam frowned at the locked door.
My shoulders lifted in a deep breath. "I got the night off."
CHAPTER TWENTY
I didn't know where else to go, and I needed to find Mason so we went to Nate's house. In Adam's car was Becky with her boyfriend, Adam and me. I found out the boyfriend's name was Raz and he thought Logan was "neat-o."When we drove up to the mansion, Adam frowned and parked around the fountain. "No lights are on. No one's home?"
It didn't matter. I got out and pressed the code to the garage. As we went in, I flipped on the lights.
"Oh, wow." Becky spun in a tight circle as the mansion was flooded with light. "I didn't expect that."
Raz held onto her hand and blasted me a bright smile.
I frowned. The kid seemed off, but she seemed happy with him. He had comforted her in the alley and then made her giggle in the backseat. Everyone knew she'd been tense because of me. I wondered how long they'd been dating or how they got together, but then she glanced at me and I stopped wondering.
Her eyes were full of questions, along with something dark. She couldn't be sorry. She chose her fate. She had nothing to feel sad about.
I felt a swift kick to my gut again. She'd been the friend I thought would stay no matter what and she bailed.
The corner of her lip started to tremble. But I moved away. Becky wasn't my problem anymore. She stopped being my problem the moment she believed Adam's lie.
"Where's Kade?" Adam frowned at me.
I shook my head. "Hold on." I hurried up the stairs and to our bedroom, but no one was in there. No note, nothing. I wasn't sure what I was looking for, but I hadn't expected the empty house. Reaching for my back pocket, I cursed. I left my purse and phone at the diner.
"Adam," I called out as I went out to the banister.
"Yeah?"
"My stuff's at the diner. I left it all there."
He held a finger up. "Hold on." Then pulled out his phone and pressed a number. It wasn't long before we heard him ask, "Can I speak to Heather Jax? Oh, hey! This is Adam Quinn….Yeah, I'm a friend of Sam's…Yeah, we brought her home, but listen….yeah, her stuff's still there." He nodded a few more times, murmured 'yeah' again, and then said, "That sounds great. Thanks."
He looked up. "She's going to bring it over after closing, but she said there was a text from Mason. She read one and it said something about a family meeting with his mom?" He frowned. "You know what that meant?"
Relief rushed through me. They were in L.A. They were not headed to the diner. I nodded. "Yeah, I know. They won't be home till tomorrow."
Raz let out a whoop. "Hellsayeaha! Party in the Monson's bisnatch!"
Becky glared and slapped her hand to his chest.
He grunted and doubled over but peeked at her from the corner of his eye. When she rolled her eyes, he wrapped his arms around her and twirled her in the air. More giggles came from her with his laughter intermixed. The two disappeared down the hallway.
As I came down the stairs, Adam followed me into the kitchen area and sat on a bar stool. I started looking through the cupboards when he asked, "It's weird with her?"
I spied the rum and snatched it up. When I put it on the counter between us, I ignored his shock and looked for two shot glasses. I didn't like the hard stuff, but this rum was citrus flavored. This stuff I could drink just fine. Logan would be so proud of me right now.
"So it is weird." He nodded as he answered himself.
I pursed my lips from annoyance. I didn't want to talk about Becky. I didn't want to think about Becky, and I certainly didn't want to acknowledge that she was even in my home now. I put the two shot glasses between us and filled both to the rim. I slid one towards him and gripped the other. "Here's to not thinking about how we should go back to Manny's so I can beat that girl's ass."
Adam choked on his drink. "What?!"
I took my shot in one gulp. It was there. It was gone. I filled it again. As I tossed that one back, I started for a third, but Adam grabbed the bottle away from me.
His eyes were searching me. "What are you talking about? What girl?"
I wanted that bottle back. I needed it to help me forget. She had hurt Mason. I wanted to hurt her. I was starting to forget the consequences of going back and doing just that. What could her brothers do to me anyway? Heather could've been overreacting.
"Nothing," I clipped out.
"Sam."
I eyed the bottle in his hand, and when his hand relaxed, I grabbed it from him. I had my third shot poured within a second. He sat back with a defeated sigh so I filled a second one for him. Then I put the bottle between us as we both took our glasses and lifted them in the air. As he drank his, I leaned against the counter. Then I found myself saying, "There's a girl back there that did something to Mason. She caused a lot of problems for him and I really want to hurt her."
"Sam."
I grimaced against the sympathy in his voice and downed that third shot. It didn't burn. None of the three drinks had, but I didn't taste the sweetness anymore.
I pressed my hands against my eyes. What was I doing? I didn't drink my problems away. I wasn't that girl. I drew in a shuddering breath. What was going on? So much had happened and in such a short amount of time.
"Sam." Adam's voice was soft this time. He had moved around the counter and stood close as he pulled my hands away. "What's going on?"
"Nothing."
I pulled away from him, but he didn't release my hands. He kept them in his grip and he bent down so he could see me eye to eye. "Sam, talk to me. What is going on with you? I'm lying to your mom. Logan said about you running away and how they can't press charges against you? Then you took this job at Manny's, which I kind of understand, but now you're living here? What happened with your mom?"
"Sam?"
A whimper came from the doorway. I knew Becky had heard everything. Oh god. The secrets were out, but were they even secrets?
"Sam." Adam pulled me into him and wrapped his arms around me. He rested his chin on top of my head and smoothed a hand down my back. "You can talk to us. Becky messed up—"
She scooted closer. "I did. I really did. I'm sorry, Sam. I really am."
He continued after a deep breath, "—but she still cares about you. So do I, and I'm trying to embrace this platonic stuff here. I don't know what boundary is where and what line says only friendship, but you need to start helping out. I think if you talked to us, that'd be okay. Right?" He looked over his shoulder to Becky. "You'd ask this, right?"
She bobbed her head up and down. Her hands were folded in front of her as she scooted closer two steps. "Yes. I would. I'd want to know—"
I pushed away from Adam and rounded on her. "You don't get to do this."
Her eyes went wide. "Do what?"
"Come in here and try to get around your apology."
"My apology?" She gulped. Raz sidled up next to her, but he only took one of her hands in his.
All the anger, all the turmoil inside of me wrapped together as I lashed out, "You knew Adam was hurt by me. You knew he was angry, and you still believed him. What'd he even say, Becky? That I laughed at you behind your back? Does that sound like me? When have I ever laughed at someone? Ever! And you thought I was laughing at you, the only person who was my friend after what Jeff did to me, after what Jessica and Lydia did to me? Did you really think that I would laugh at you?"
Her head hung down again. Her soft, "No," was almost inaudible, but I heard.
It stung.
I reared back a step. I couldn't believe what I had heard. "You didn't believe him?"
"No." Her head came back up, and all the blood was gone. She was pale and trembling. Raz tried to stop both of her hands, but her legs were shaking too. "I knew you wouldn't have done that to me, but it hurt when he said it. I did believe him at first, kind of, but I didn't at the same time. It made sense to me. You were dating Mason Kade. You were friends with his brother. I mean, why would you be fr
iends with me? I'm nothing." She stopped as her voice started to quiver.
I wanted to curse at her. She hurt me, and I was supposed to feel sorry for her? "Give me a break."
She gasped. Her eyes were wide once again. She visibly swallowed, clinging to her boyfriend's hand.
I shook my head. All the hurt and anger, I needed it out of me. I already had so much for Analise. I didn't need any more. It needed to be gone. But I couldn't deny what I felt. "You're not nothing. You've never been nothing. You were the only friend I had, even before I started dating Mason."
"You had me," Adam spoke up.
I snorted at him. "Really?"
He flashed me a tight grin. "Shutting up. This isn't about me."
"Thank you."
More tears had fallen over Becky's face, but she ignored them. "I'm really sorry, Sam. I really am. I was so stupid, and I was hurt."
"Why?" That made no sense.
"Because I felt left out. I knew you were close to the Kades, but it wasn't until that last party when I realized how tight you were with them. I mean, hello. Mason Kade is fighting for you, and then Logan snubs Lydia f for you. She came onto him and he smacked her back and for what? For you. Those two care so much about you and when you're with them, it's like no one else matters except you three. You never even invited me to your home before, like I wasn't good enough or something."
"The four of them."
"What?" She looked at Adam.
He stiffened. "The four of them. Nate Monson's in there too."
"Oh yeah. I know, but he wasn't always around then. But that too. Look at this place. You're living at his house. He moved back, and now you're here with them. It's the four of you guys again."
I didn't know what to say. A part of me didn't care anymore. Her feelings were hurt? Well, she'd gotten me back. Good for her.
Becky hadn't stopped crying. Her boyfriend raised his skinny hand and wiped a few tears away. His thumb caressed her cheek and skimmed under her eye. The touch was gentle and loving. She was with someone who loved her. I could tell, just from watching him. I drew in an anguished breath. Becky was dating someone. She had someone who loved her. It started to really dawn on me. She had met a boy, dated a boy, had more dates with him, and hadn't told me. That was my job as her friend—I felt robbed of that.
I closed my eyes and turned away. I knew what I needed to do and it hurt. But it needed to be done.
"Sam?" Her voice dropped to a hoarse whisper. "Can you please forgive me? I'm sorry. I'm really sorry for believing Adam's lies."
I shook my head. I needed to forgive her and I knew I would, but she needed to realize something. I looked up with a tear in my own eye. "You wanted to believe him."
She flinched, like I had slapped her.
I pressed, "I didn't leave you behind. I didn't laugh at you behind your back. I wasn't using you. And you knew all of that, but you wanted to believe Adam's lie even when you knew it wasn't true. I think you did it because you were mad at me."
"But—" Her mouth hung open.
Adam frowned. "Why would she be mad at you?"
I shrugged, though my eyes never left hers. Then I saw it. Guilt. When her head went back down, I knew I'd been right. "She was mad at me because I had what she wanted. You were jealous, weren't you?"
Her head nodded up and down, but she didn't say a word.
"I had what you wanted, didn't I?"
As she looked back up, the anguish was all over her. More tears flooded her, her mouth was turned down in a frown, and she shook her head. "I'm so stupid, right? You went to the top, Sam. You got the guys that no one could get. I mean, you got both of them. Logan Kade worships the ground you walk on. You got what everyone wanted, not just me. Can you blame me for being jealous? Isn't that a human thing for me to do? To be jealous?" A sickened laugh bubbled out of her. "Yeah, I was mad at you. Yeah, I was jealous of you, but I was your friend. I'm sorry that I let myself believe Adam's lie. It was horrible of me. I know that and I really regret it. I really do, Sam. I really really do."
My heart sank with each word she said, but I couldn't argue with them. I knew there were more girls, a lot more, that felt the same as she did. Who was I to be taken in by the Kades? What was so special about me? I knew Becky wouldn't voice those questions to me. I knew she might never want to admit to those thoughts, but they were there. I had them too.
"This is bullshit," Adam cursed behind me. He moved next to me with disgust. "This is about the Kades? Again? Are you serious?"
Becky covered her mouth with her hand. More whimpers escaped her, and then she turned to her boyfriend. His arms came around her, and he patted the back of her head as he shot Adam a dark look. "Man. Respect it."
Adam rolled his eyes. "I'm so sick of this. Can we not have one night without talking about them?"
I hissed at him, "You're not helping."
He threw up his hands. "I'm not trying anymore. I didn't know all this boiled down to those guys again. What's so damn special about them? Their looks? I'm good looking. That they're athletic? I'm the freaking quarterback for FCA. I was the quarterback. Whatever! What's so damn special about them?"
Raz spoke up, "Dude, they're legends. Legit and smack dab. Legends, dude. That's all. Legends."
Adam snorted. "This is ridiculous." He turned to me, frustrated. "Are you okay?"
I nodded. Strangely, I was. When Becky sniffled and wiped her nose, all the hurt and anger was gone. She had admitted it, and that was what I needed. I guess…
"I'm going. I'm not sticking around to hear about how godly these douches are. See you, Sam. Becky, you two want a ride home?"
She looked at me, a deep question in her, but I slunk back against the counter. She could stay if she wanted. She could go if she wanted. This was her time to choose if she was going to be there for me or not. I wasn't going to tell her what to do.
"I…" She opened her mouth, then closed it.
Raz spoke up again, "She's staying. I'm coming. Let's go to the Hop-It. All this crying made me hungry."
He pressed a kiss to Becky's forehead and whispered something in her ear, which had her grinning. She relaxed in his arms, but then he skipped around her, swatted Adam on the butt, and led the way out of the room.
Adam followed behind him, "It's the IHOP, Raz. It's not the Hop-It."
Raz called to him, "It's always the Hop-It. That's what you do. You hop it, you get it?"
A long frustrated sigh came from Adam before the door closed behind them.
Both of us looked at each other, now alone in Nate's fortress. It never seemed larger than in that moment. A clock should've been ticking behind us. The awkwardness of the moment would've fit well with that idea. As I grinned to myself, she took the leap first. "Why are you living here, Sam?"
There was the old Becky, she was my friend again.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
"So…"
She gave me a timid smile. There was a twinge of hope in there, but I didn't know what to do about it. I wasn't mad anymore, but I didn't trust her either. I gave her a small grin back and said the same, "So…"
Her smile fell flat. "Oh."
I sighed. "What do you want, Becky? Thank you for being honest and thank you for apologizing, but we can't bounce back to what we were before. I don't trust you anymore."
"You don't?"
I shook my head. "Nope."
"Oh." Her shoulders lifted up in a small shrug. "Well, I guess