Trust Your Heart

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Trust Your Heart Page 8

by Sharon Drane

Chapter 7

  Amelia regretted her impulse to slam the door behind Joshua, though not much. Jo Beth ran into the hallway.

  “Whatever is the matter? Weren’t you glad to see him?” She put her hand on Amelia’s shoulder.

  “It is of no consequence. He’s gone now.” Amelia shook off her sister-in-law’s hand and started for the staircase.

  Jo Beth refused to be left behind. “What is it? Did he say something? Was he rude to you?”

  Amelia felt tears start to run down her cheeks but she swallowed them back. She wouldn’t shed another tear over Joshua Hawthorne. “He bought my grandmother’s ring from Mr. Duchesne.” Her sobs started in earnest, and she gave up trying to hold them back. “He wanted me to have it.”

  “That villain!” declared Jo Beth, unable to hide her smile. “That’s nothing to cry about, is it? What a lovely thing for him to do, especially after all this time. He must truly love you.”

  “It doesn’t matter. It’s finished between us and has been for years. I gave up hope when he stopped writing.”

  Jo Beth took Amelia’s arm and led her into the family salon. “I have something to tell you.”

  Amelia turned to bolt from the room, only to have Jo Beth jump in her way. She faced Jo Beth with her arms crossed tightly. “I don’t want to hear it. I’ve had enough turmoil for one day.”

  “You are going to sit down and listen to me, if I have to hold you down.”

  Amelia looked at Jo Beth and sat on the nearest chair. It would be best to let her sister-in-law say what she wanted. “What are you going on about? What can be so important?” Amelia brushed the tears away with an impatient hand.

  Jo Beth looked away and paced slowly across the small room. “I have a confession to make.”

  “What is it?” Amelia asked, drumming her fingers on the doorframe.

  “Joshua didn’t stop writing to you.”

  “That’s what he said, but I couldn’t believe it. Even with the war, correspondence often made it through the battle lines.”

  Jo Beth stood in front of Amelia. “I stole his letters.” Jo Beth blew out a relieved breath. “There, I said it. I’ve wanted to tell you for years.”

  Amelia sat and looked up at her sister-in-law, anguish filling her. She could barely breathe for the band of pain constricting her chest. “Why? Why would you do such a thing?”

  “Clayton loved you. While Joshua was on your mind, you dismissed Clayton as a suitor. I wanted my brother to have what he wanted.”

  “And what about what I wanted?” Amelia felt the rage building inside as her face began to warm.

  Jo Beth smiled at her. “Can you honestly say you had a bad life with my brother? He treated you well, didn’t he? You bore his son. What more could any woman ask?” “Besides, you only met Joshua one time.” She started to laugh. “You couldn’t love him after only one meeting.”

  Amelia’s heart clenched and vomit rose in her throat. She looked at Jo Beth as though truly seeing her for the first time.

  “How could you do that? How could you be so cruel?” She rose and brushed past her sister-in-law.

  “It was for the best. With the war no one knew if you’d ever see Joshua again. He could have been killed or wounded. Clayton was here and he wanted you. Please understand, Amelia.” Jo Beth tried to touch Amelia’s arm.

  “Don’t you dare touch me. It is all I can do not to strike you.” Amelia recoiled and glowered at Jo Beth, once her best friend and now her sister-in-law. “You knew how I felt about Joshua. How could you have interfered in my life that way? What gave you the right to decide for me?”

  “Don’t be silly. You couldn’t possibly love him. You barely knew him.”

  Amelia put a safe distance between herself and Jo Beth, as she tried to control her breathing. What a blind fool I have been. At the doorway, she turned. “You’re the one I barely knew. I must thank you for one thing. I had been reconsidering my plans to take Dougie and move to St. Louis.” She smiled bitterly. “I felt sorry for you to have sole care of your spiteful mother. Now I see that you deserve each other’s company.”

  Jo Beth reached out to her. “Amelia, you were happy with Clayton. I know you were. It all turned out well. How can you blame me?”

  “Because it was your fault I lost the love of my life! I was content with Clayton, nothing more. Secretly I pined for Joshua and felt guilty for it. Clayton treated me like some little ninny, incapable of thinking, like another of his possessions. He told me over and over how much he liked having a pretty wife on his arm.”

  She paused, so angry she could not speak. Her fist pressing hard into her stomach, she continued. “He risked his life, our assets, and never told me. Why? Was I too stupid, too much of a fool to deal with such knowledge?”

  Tiny beads of sweat popped out around Amelia’s forehead as anger swelled tighter within her. “And what did this little fool do? I cleaned his wounds, nursed him through his last illness and tried to keep my son safe.”

  “Amelia, I know it was hard on you . . . .”

  “You don’t know anything. There was nothing left in that big house but three beds and three chairs. Clayton was so proud of that place. It’s nothing now and ought to be chopped up for kindling. We survived because I dealt with criminals bent on making themselves rich while overcharging the desperate. I learned never to trust anyone. Thanks to your confession today, that lesson has been reinforced. We will leave day after tomorrow as planned. Goodbye, Jo Beth. We are finished. I will not speak to you again.” She walked out the doorway and did not look back even when she heard her sister-in-law sob and collapse to the floor.

  The next day – Union Army Headquarters

  Joshua sat and wrote his observations of the conditions in New Orleans. He found it difficult to concentrate on his task, but first and foremost he was a soldier completing his mission. His mind kept going back to his meeting with Amelia. He laid down the quill, and sighed. Perhaps he was too optimistic when he thought he would simply walk in and sweep her off her feet. She had been correct. Time had passed. They had both been changed by events in the ensuing years.

  He grieved for that bright happy young woman he first met on Christmas Eve, who wrote such vivacious letters. The war had changed them both. Only his love for her remained the same.

  “Excuse me, Major Hawthorne.” The sergeant stood at attention.

  “Yes, what is it?”

  “There’s a lady here named Wilcox who is asking to see you.”

  Amelia must have changed her mind. His heartbeat raced faster. He smiled. “Please show her in, Sergeant.” Surely she has relented. Why else would she be here? Joshua stood and brushed off his uniform with shaking hands

  “Ma’am, you can go in now.”

  The woman who entered was the right age, but she was not Amelia. This one was dark haired.

  Joshua frowned in confusion and disappointment. Who is this woman?

  “Major Hawthorne, I am Jo Beth Wilcox.” She smiled and extended her hand. “I am happy to meet you at last. I’ve heard so much about you.”

  Joshua smiled at her as he took her hand. “I have heard a lot about you and your younger exploits.”

  She laughed delightedly. “Yes, I am certain Amelia filled her letters with our pranks.”

  He gestured to a chair. “Please sit down, Miss Wilcox.” When he was seated behind the desk he looked at her for a moment. “What can I do for you?”

  She looked away from his scrutiny, her expression serious. “I’ve come to talk to you about Amelia.”

  “Yes, I thought you might have. Please go on.”

  Jo Beth took a deep breath. “I am afraid I have unintentionally hurt both of you.”

  “How did you hurt us?” A suspicion began to form in his mind.

  “It did not seem so serious to me at the time, but when I told Amelia about stealing your letters, she became furious and now refuses to speak to me. That’s why she never wrote you again.”

  His face
grew devoid of all expression as he looked at her with hooded eyes. He could scarcely believe any woman would do such a thing. Joshua fought to keep his irritation in check.

  “I just wanted my brother to have her. He loved her so much. She thought of him as a friend or perhaps an older brother. With you out of the way, he was able to persuade her to marry him.”

  “Why are you moved to confess to me at this time? If you think I will intercede for you with Amelia, I will not.” His voice was cold, all pretense of friendliness gone.

  Jo Beth shook her head. “I wouldn’t expect you to help me. It’s about Amelia, she was not happy with my brother. I never realized it. She never wrote about what she went through with him.”

  “They did not remain here in New Orleans?”

  “No, my father was still living then. He sent Clayton to open a second office of our shipping company in Galveston, Texas. Father thought with the outbreak of the war, we would be better able to ship goods from Galveston rather than New Orleans. He never expected the Union to blockade Galveston as they had New Orleans. Clayton and Amelia spent the war years there.”

  “I’ve heard conditions were bad in Galveston.”

  “Yes, apparently so, according to what Amelia has told me. Food was scarce and medicine was unavailable. Clayton was wounded. While he healed from the wound, there was a yellow fever epidemic. He caught it and died.”

  “How was he wounded?”

  “Yankees shot him when he met the blockade runners to buy food.” Jo Beth shared the whole story of Amelia’s war years on Galveston.

  Joshua pictured Amelia in an empty house, all the furnishings gone. No wonder she didn’t trust anybody. “I am sorry that she had to suffer. She didn’t deserve what happened.” He glared at Jo Beth. “Why are you telling me this now? What do you expect me to do?”

  “They leave tomorrow on the Dixie Queen for St. Louis. She is going to live with her sister. Don’t let her go alone. It isn’t safe for her.” Jo Beth rose from the chair.

  He stood and towered over her, his arms crossed over his chest. “Why should I believe anything you say, considering what you have just admitted?”

  “It was not easy to come here and tell you the truth. You can scarcely think I would put myself through this ordeal for fun. Besides, Major Hawthorne, she’s worth the battle it will take to win her.”

  “I’ve always thought so.” He looked at the woman whose actions had derailed his careful plans made so long ago. “What will you get out of this?”

  “I will have the chance to see the wrong I did made right. Truly, I want her to be happy, whether she speaks to me again or not. Please, go after her.”

  “I’ll consider it.”

  “Thank you for seeing me,” she murmured. With a nod, she hurried out of the room.

  He could hear her being escorted out of the building. The swish of her silk skirts was accompanied by the sound of booted footsteps that faded down the hallway.

  Joshua swallowed his anger at what she had done. Whatever had happened was in the past. Now he had one chance to save the woman he’d loved for so long. There was no time to be angry. There were plans to be made and a wire to be sent to General Grant’s headquarters.

 

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