by Rae Knightly
Bob stared at her in obvious irritation, then said with determination, “I want Ben to know I’m his dad.”
Laura bit her lip hard. Her mind scrambled for a reply, but she felt so drained. She couldn’t handle another drama.
Bob glared at her, and when she didn’t answer, he said, “What? Am I not worthy? Is that what you’re thinking?”
Please, not now!
Bob fidgeted in apparent anger. “Come on, say it, then! It’s not that hard!”
Laura’s exhaustion turned to anger. Didn’t he understand that this wasn’t the right time, nor the right place? Emotions bubbled inside and threatened to explode.
He leant forward and stared at her with hard eyes. “Say it!”
“You promised you’d watch over Ben!” she burst. “You said you’d only be gone for five minutes, but you were out for five hours, drinking with your buddies. What kind of a dad gets into a car without a driver’s license, crashes into another car, then runs off in a panic?”
Bob didn’t move an inch. He waited to make sure she was done, then said in a low voice, “Now that wasn’t so hard, was it?”
They glared at each other.
A candle died out, leaving a smell of burnt wax.
“Look,” Bob said. “I can tell you haven’t read a single letter I sent you these past eleven years…”
“Thirteen,” she corrected.
Bob raised his eyes. “All right, twelve, thirteen, whatever. The point is, if you’d read any of them, you’d know how often I repeated those very phrases to myself, day in, day out, night after night, going over what I’d done, wishing I’d reacted differently, hating myself every single minute for my stupid reaction.”
“But you turned a deaf ear on me. You visited me only once in my five-year jail term, and it was to tell me you gave Ben your dad’s surname instead of mine, that you told Ben I’d died in the crash and never to contact you again.” His pale face trembled with rage. “And I felt so bad I fell for it and agreed.”
He intertwined his fingers, their knuckles going white. “And then, it came to me one day. I was wasting my life away–waiting, hoping, praying–for you to forgive me. But I realized, the only one who could forgive me was me. If I were ever to move forward, I would need to make my own peace, stop looking back and live my life. I figured, no-one was badly hurt in the crash. I paid my dues. So I forgave myself, respected your wish and moved on.”
He waved his arms at the apartment. “You could have been part of it, you know? But you chose not to. And I wonder, sometimes, when are you going to get over it, Laura?”
His eyes dug into hers, forcing her to look down.
In her haste to find a safe place to hide, Laura had conveniently discarded the thought that this conversation would take place. How wrong she’d been! Had she really thought Bob would let them stay with him without attempting to resolve their decades-old fight?
If it hadn’t been for Ryan Archer’s contact list, Laura realized she would never have ended up here. Dad, why did you leave me Bob’s number?
But it was too late now. The day she had always dreaded loomed before her.
Ben is going to hate me.
Bob’s stance softened a little. “If you think I no longer care about what I did, you’re sorely mistaken. I still think about that crash every day. I was irresponsible and young, I know that. But I’m a grown man now, I’ve learned from my mistakes. I would never turn my back on you or Ben like that again. You’ve got to believe me.”
Laura studied his face and saw honesty reflected in it. She had shut him away from her life the minute she had learned he had been responsible for the crash, disgusted by his narrow-minded escape after his botched hit-and-run.
We were so young!
They had met in high school. They had been carefree. And then Ben had come along…
She stood and brushed at the folds in her dress. “I don’t know if I can ever forgive you, Bob, but that’s my problem, not Ben’s. It would be selfish of me to continue keeping him from his dad.” She took a deep breath. “So, I agree. We’ll tell him, together. But please, Bob, give me a week, two at the most. There’s something I need to take care of, first.”
I have to save Mesmo.
***
Ben woke, feeling rested for the first time in a long while. He had had a deep, dreamless slumber, no Tike or Bordock to torment him. He stretched, then realized his mother lay fast asleep next to him. He got out of bed as silently as possible, then took a long, refreshing shower. After days spent on the freezing Kananaskis Mountains and travelling day and night across the country, the hot water felt glorious.
Having to wear his same clothes satisfied him much less, however, but, with no other option, he stepped into Bob’s living room with his torn jeans and dirty hooded sweater.
He blinked at the bright light coming in from the windows and ruffled his wet hair, before realizing Bob was sitting on a stool at the edge of the kitchen counter, working on his computer while sipping on a cup of coffee.
“’Morning, squirt.” Bob said, turning to face him. “Did you sleep well?”
Ben noticed his uncle’s hair was as disheveled as his own, which was a bit of a relief. He smiled and replied, “Hi, Uncle Bob. Yes, thanks.”
“I think your mom’s going to be knocked out for a good while yet. She went to bed pretty late. We had a lot of catching up to do.”
Ben felt a pang of envy at having been left out of the conversation. He would have liked to learn everything he could about his newly-discovered uncle.
“You must be hungry,” Bob said, getting off the high stool and opening the fridge. “Ah, you’ll have to forgive my manners. This is a typical bachelor’s fridge. Not even an old piece of cheese in sight.” He straightened and pursed his lips. “How about we get a decent plate of eggs and bacon? I know just the right place!”
Ben wanted to hug the man. “Yes, thanks.”
“Okey-dokey. Get cleaned up, and we’ll head right out.”
Ben’s face drooped.
Do I look that messy?
Bob put his hands to his hips. “You don’t have anything else to wear, do you?” he said with half a frown.
Ben blushed and shook his head.
“All righty! Looks like we’ll be doing some shopping as well, then!” He clapped his hands together.
Ben’s nose curled automatically, making Bob laugh. “Oh, come on!” he said, wrapping an arm around Ben’s shoulders and directing him towards the elevator. “It will be fun! Just you and me. Men only.”
Ben grinned. “Thanks, Uncle Bob. I’d like that.”
CHAPTER THREE
Beetrix
Over a hearty breakfast, Bob chatted about life in Toronto. He told Ben how he successfully launched and ran three nightclubs and that he was a big fan of professional ice hockey. He promised he’d take Ben to a game.
But Ben wanted to know about his dad.
Bob shrugged, “Sorry, squirt. I can’t say much. I left home pretty young and backpacked around the world for several years. Then, I figured I needed to settle down someplace–do something with my life–and Toronto seemed as good a place as any.”
His eyes became distant. “Your dad and I weren’t that close. I’m sorry to say he was a pretty irresponsible guy and probably would have continued down that road if things hadn’t ended the way they did.”
He leant his arms on the table and bent forward to be eye-level with Ben, who was sipping on his milkshake. “Now, I will tell you this: he and I, we had the magic touch when it came to hockey passes. You should have seen him on the ice! He was the best! A natural skater with loads of potential.”
Ben’s eyes widened as he imagined his dad sliding on an ice-skating rink, dressed in hockey sportswear. “Really?”
Bob pulled back and grinned. “Yes, really!” He knocked with his knuckles on the table as if to indicate that their conversation had ended and searched for a waitress to pay the bill.
Ben continue
d to daydream as they left the restaurant and crossed the street to a triangular-shaped park.
“What about you?” Bob interrupted his thoughts.
“Huh?”
“Yeah, what about you, squirt? You haven’t told me anything. What types of things do you like?”
Ben swallowed. “Hum, I like dogs, I guess.”
“Dogs?” Bob said with a touch of amusement. “Ah, well. These are the types of dogs that I like.” He stopped walking, and Ben bumped into him.
They were standing in front of an impressive, two-tiered fountain. Spouts ejected water from the base up, the majority of these originating from a dozen statues placed around the fountain.
In a different life and a different time, Ben would have found these statues quite comical, but not so at this very moment, because the figures happened to represent dogs of all kinds. Some were placed outside the fountain, others, inside, and out of their snouts, water arched in clean lines into the basins above.
“We’re in Berczy Park,” Bob explained. “And this is–you’ll never guess–Dog Fountain.” He chuckled. “I thought you might like it.”
Ben knew he was waiting for some kind of sign of approval, as any typical boy would have, but he couldn’t do it. He offered Bob a forced smile. “Cool,” he said, struggling to contain his pained heart, then sighed. “Can we go, now?”
Bob pouted his lower lip and shrugged, “Sure.”
They walked towards busier streets and glanced absentmindedly at store windows.
“So,” Bob said with his hands in his pockets. “Who’s this Mesmo guy, anyway? Your mom’s boyfriend?”
Ben poofed, then bit his lower lip to get a hold of himself. “No.” He giggled, then thought the better of it. “He’s a good friend, though. We’re supposed to meet him here.”
He shut his mouth, wondering if he was saying too much, then suddenly remembered Kimi’s surprised face when she had found out that her mother, Maggie, and their host, Thomas, had revealed that they had feelings for each other. Was he missing something similar between Laura and Mesmo?
Adults can be weird in that way.
His thoughts were interrupted when Bob led him into a clothing store and began fishing out jeans, shorts and sweaters. Before long, Bob shoed him into the dressing rooms, his arms laden with clothes. It took Ben a while to sift through the mound.
“Are you ok in there?” Bob called after a long while.
“Humph, I think this shirt is too small.” Ben pulled open the curtain to show him.
Bob checked the price tag for the size, then clicked his fingers. “Off with it. I’ll get you a bigger size.”
Ben pulled the shirt over his head, then winced. He stared at his chest and found the black mark near his heart–a painful reminder of where Tike had been hit. He removed the shirt with more care and handed it to Bob, but found the man staring at him with deep worry lines on his forehead.
He saw the wound!
“Um…skiing accident in Alberta,” Ben muttered.
“Ah,” Bob said as he accepted the shirt. “That looks bad. Maybe we should have it checked…”
“Oh no, that’s fine.” Ben jumped in a little too quickly. “I’m much better already.” He closed the curtain in a hurry and shut his lips tightly so he wouldn’t burst into tears.
From then on, the mood between them changed, and even though Bob bought him a cupboard-full of clothing and sneakers, Ben couldn’t quite get that frown off his uncle’s face for the rest of the morning.
“Do you want to get some ice cream at the lake?” the man asked after they were done shopping. It was almost noon.
Ben wanted to go home, but at the same time he didn’t want to darken his uncle’s mood further, so he accepted.
They ended up at the edge of a lush park called Tommy Thompson Park, which formed a curious web-like net of paths straight into Lake Ontario. The Canadian/US border ran through the middle of it. Ben squinted, hoping to spot the other side of the vast body of water, but the US shore was too far away.
He sat and rested his back against the trunk of a tree while Bob went to get their ice creams from a local vendor. He stroked the grass with the palm of his hands and enjoyed the occasional ray of the sun on his face.
I wonder if Kimi is eating ice cream, too?
“There’s an ice cream truck that sells the best bubblegum flavour in the world. You’ll see.” Her voice echoed in his head, and he wished he could have stayed in Canmore long enough to taste it.
If you crush me, I’ll sting you!
Ben gasped. He looked down and found his hands glowing. He glanced around to make sure no-one had noticed, then stuffed his hands hurriedly in the pockets of his new, hooded sweatshirt.
A gentle humming reached his ears, and when he searched through the grass with his eyes, he found a rather large bee lumbering around the green stems, close to where his hand had been.
Oops! Sorry!
It seemed proper to apologize. Remembering what Mesmo had taught him, Ben presented himself.
I am Benjamin Archer. May I speak with you?
There was no immediate answer, but rather, a wave of desolation brushed at his mind. Ben quickly set up a mental barrier between his and the bee’s feelings.
Hello, Benjamin Archer. I am Beetrix. Yes, we may talk.
Ben smiled briefly at the bee’s name, but at the same time knew instinctively that something was wrong.
What’s the matter?
The insect brushed at its antennas.
I can’t find my hive. My children won’t make it without me.
Ben frowned.
Why?
Beetrix buzzed her wings.
Because I am their queen.
Ben’s mouth dropped.
No wonder she seems bigger than an ordinary bee.
The thought escaped before he could hold it back, but she heard him anyway. She did not seem to mind, however.
I am larger than the others because I am the mother of a thousand children. They are lost without me–if we are not lost already…
What do you mean?
An illness has spread in our midst. I cannot identify it. I had hoped that, by moving my hive, we would find a healthier home. But that is when we got sepa…aah!”
A gigantic foot stepped on Beetrix, rendering everything dark in Ben’s mind.
Bob stood right beside him, plastering the grass with his shoe.
“Get off!” Ben cried, jumping to his feet and pushing the man aside forcefully.
An ice cream cone slipped out of Bob’s hand, its contents splattering to the ground. “Whoa!” he yelled. “Take it easy, squirt!” He gestured toward the grass. “Those things sting!”
“No!” Ben said vehemently. “Not this one.” He crouched and searched the grass with his mind.
Beetrix?
A tiny movement indicated she was still alive.
Ben let out a breath of relief.
Beetrix buzzed angrily a couple of times and climbed to the top of a grass stem.
Are you hurt?
She tested her wings.
I am fine. But tell that giant troll to watch where he puts his paws!
Ben fought a smile.
Come with me. I’ll help you find your hive.
Beetrix considered the offer for a second, then clambered onto Ben’s sleeve and nestled in the boy’s hoody.
When Ben stood again, Bob was staring at him with his nose curled and one eyebrow raised. “Are you serious?” he said, licking at his ice cream.
Ben grinned. “Yep.” He carefully checked that his hands weren’t glowing too much, then picked up the shopping bags with his new clothes inside.
“I’m allergic,” Bob warned as they headed out of the park.
“It’s ok. I’ll tell her not to sting you.”
Bob paused the fraction of a second, before biting into the sweet dessert. “You’re a weird kid,” he said.
“I know.”
“And I’m not getting
you another ice cream,” he added, a drop of white vanilla landing on his beard. “’Diz is mine.”
Ben laughed. “That’s ok. Sugar is bad for kids my age anyway.”
They walked, side by side, the dark mood between them having lifted somewhat.
“Uncle Bob?”
“Hm?”
“You know bees like ice cream, don’t you?”
CHAPTER FOUR
Suspicion
“Hi, Mom!”
Laura heard Ben greet her as she stepped out of the bedroom. But he didn’t stop to talk to her. He dropped shopping bags on the floor and headed straight for the balcony.
She pulled on a sweater and followed him. “Hi, honey. Where have you been?” She wanted to give him a hug, but he said, “Careful!” She pulled back and watched him remove a bee from his hoody with extreme care. His hands glowed a soft, blue colour. He placed the bee on a decorative shrub, then spoke to it, “I’ll get you something more comfortable in a bit.”
Only then did he turn his attention to Laura. “Her name’s Beetrix. She lost her hive. I’m going to help her find it.”
Laura smiled and ruffled his hair.
“Oh! And Uncle Bob took me shopping. He bought me tons of clothes and these sneakers.” He pointed at the clean, new shoes on his feet.
“Really?” Laura said thoughtfully. “That’s nice of him.”
Ben nodded, checking up on his new insect friend. “Yeah. He took me for breakfast and everything!”
Laura stopped stroking his hair and stared at him, but he seemed to be in a genuinely good mood.
She let out an inward sigh of relief.
Bob didn’t tell him.
“Ben,” she said. “Have you heard from Mesmo?”
Her son’s face darkened as he shook his head. “I tried contacting him this morning,” he said, tapping his wristwatch with the alien spirit portal in it.
Laura’s heart thumped loudly, but she didn’t want Ben to notice her worry. He had enough on his mind. Her thoughts had been on the alien ever since she had seen him last, standing on a snowy ledge, his spirit almost transparent from the effort of having saved them repeatedly on the Kananaskis Mountains. That had been four days ago.
