After the flight, we were met at the airport by a security guard. “Knox, this is Catherine Sparrow. Cat, this is Jeff Knox. He’s a good friend of mine, who helps me out with crowds from time to time.”
I shook hands with the big man, and he led us to the baggage claim. It didn’t take long until Jesse was recognized. Cell phones were whipped out and some people screamed, and several people tried to crowd close. Mr. Knox kept things under control—not allowing anyone to touch Jesse, and forcing them to keep a moderate distance.
“No pictures, no autographs, Knox,” Jesse said.
I kept my head down, trying to keep calm. This was fine. I expected it. It actually wasn’t as scary as I thought it might be, but it was still plenty intimidating. Jesse put a protective arm around me, and we gathered our bags and Knox led us to a sleek, black car with heavily tinted windows.
We slid into the back seat and Knox drove us out of there like he’d done it a hundred times. Jesse reached over and buckled my seatbelt, then did his own. Biting his lower lip, he grabbed my hand, his gaze moving between each of my eyes. “Please don’t let the weirdness of my life chase you away. Please stay connected with me. Please remember that I’m here, underneath all this craziness, and I’m all in this with you.”
I took a breath and squeezed his hand. “I’m all in, too, Jesse. I’m terrified, but I’m all in.” He kissed me fiercely in the dark car as we raced through the streets of Los Angeles.
We checked into a hotel in Westwood Village, where we would be getting ready for the premiere, which was to be at 5:00 at The Village Theatre. I thought a Wednesday was a strange night for a premiere, but Jesse said that was standard.
As Jesse fit the keycard into the door, I thought this meant we would finally be alone, and I could relax a little. But Knox followed us inside, where we found three other people. Stylists, plus Jesse’s agent, Jerry Russo.
The next two hours were a blur of hairdressing, makeup application, last minute ironing, and getting zipped into my dress. A stylist named Marguerite kept calling it my “gown” which made me giggle. I’d have to remember to tell that to my sisters.
I didn’t even see Jesse through most of this. He was in the other bedroom where someone was giving him a haircut and a shave and putting some makeup on him, too. I was starving, and nervous, and I just wished he were with me.
Marguerite was holding up a necklace to see if it went with my gown, when a knock came at the door. “It’s me, Jesse.”
“Oh, please come in,” I said, ducking out from under Marguerite and opening the door. I threw my arms around his neck, Marguerite clucking behind me that I should be careful not to mess up my hair.
“Are you okay?” he whispered so she couldn’t hear.
“I’m okay. And you don’t have to keep asking me that.”
He kissed my forehead and then released me. “I’ll try to stop, but I keep thinking all of this is going to scare you off.”
I put my palm on his cheek. “I know this isn’t your everyday life. This is a special occasion. And as completely surreal as it all is, I’m trying to enjoy it. I love the way Marguerite did my makeup, and I’m just trying to soak it all in.”
He bent for a kiss.
“Ut!” Marguerite scolded. “No kissing. Her lipstick is perfect. You can kiss later.”
He sighed, but complied. Then he reached in the inside pocket of his jacket and pulled out a granola bar. “Hungry?”
I reached for it, but Marguerite cut in. “You can eat later, too. Nobody starved in one evening.”
Jesse tucked it back in his pocket, but, with his back to her, he mouthed, “You can eat it in the car.”
The Village Theatre was beautiful. On the outside, that is. The lobby was beautiful, too, but I never made it farther inside than that. We spent an hour on the red carpet, first taking pictures and signing autographs for fans who showed up to watch the parade of stars, then greeting his co-stars and the production crew as well as various other celebrities, and finally talking with a few reporters.
Jesse introduced me straight away to everyone as Catherine, his girlfriend. It warmed my insides so well that my beaming smile was genuine. Answering questions was easy. I pretended I was talking to my sisters, because they would be watching this, and it wasn’t too bad.
I met several of his co-stars, who were very kind, and who did indeed talk a lot about James. It was as it should be, but I saw the toll it took on Jesse. After the last interview, he tugged my hand and we walked quickly into the lobby. He pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes shut.
“Jesse?”
He held out a hand, silently asking for a minute.
He sniffed, then walked to a plush bench and sat down, with his elbows propped on his knees and his head in his hands. I sat beside him, waving away anyone who walked near.
“We were supposed to be together tonight. James and me. We were supposed to watch this together, and laugh at ourselves on the screen,” Jesse said, still holding his head. “I can’t do it. I can’t go in there and see his face up there without him.”
“Then we won’t. Let’s go get cheeseburgers instead.”
He lifted his head, smiling at me, and with no thought for my lipstick, he kissed me.
We snuck out a side door, dodging Jesse’s co-stars. Jesse called Knox, who pulled the car around and took us to a diner where we could get burgers. Knox offered to wait in the car, but Jesse said he should come in and eat, so the three of us sat at a small booth.
If the waitress recognized Jesse, she didn’t make a fuss. She was probably used to seeing celebrities. I bet she got better tips when she left them alone.
“Russo isn’t going to like this,” Knox said before biting into his burger.
“I don’t care,” Jesse said, grinning, and I think the defiance bolstered him a little. It was a bit of control that he could have, a tiny way to give himself what he needed.
“You ok—” Jesse stopped himself from asking the dreaded question. “What did you think of the red carpet?”
I ate a fry and thought about it. “You know what? My favorite part was greeting the fans. I didn’t think I’d like it, but I actually did. The signs some of them made were hilarious.”
Knox guffawed, pounding his chest to help him swallow. “Did you see the one that said, ‘Jesse Relic has nice teeth!’?”
I laughed. “I did see it.” I nudged Jesse’s foot with mine under the table. “It’s true.”
He shook his head and tried not to smile.
“But I liked that part. Their genuine enthusiasm and support. And possibly the fact that they were behind a barrier.”
“I couldn’t do this job if it weren’t for the fans.”
The conversation turned to Knox’s baby son, and then to Otto and the caves. It was Knox who brought us back to reality as we finished eating. “You need to at least make an appearance at the after party. Not for Russo, but for Christine and Franco and the rest of them.”
Those were Jesse’s co-stars, and Knox was probably right. “I’ll go if you want,” I said, “but I also think it’s okay to skip it if you’d rather.”
Jesse tapped the tabletop with his pointer fingers. “It’s at Christine’s house. It won’t be crazy. We can go.”
At first I’d been disappointed not to get to see the film, but right then, I was glad. Christine Diaz starred opposite Jesse, and if Jesse’s other movies were anything to go by, they definitely kissed in this movie. I liked her when I met her, and I knew it wasn’t real, but I was glad not to have that image imprinted in my brain if we were going to her house.
The party was crazy. It wasn’t the quiet, friendly hangout that Jesse had thought it would be. There were tons of people there. But it wasn’t like the premiere, either. Jesse was comfortable with these people. We sat outside on a loveseat, and everyone was as drawn to him as I was. They told stories from the set, and I listened and enjoyed getting to know that side of Jesse. But it was also exhausting to reme
mber everyone’s names, to try to keep up with stories they knew by heart, and to make sure I didn’t say anything stupid. After about an hour, I excused myself to the bathroom.
I’d been in there about twenty minutes when a knock came at the door. “Cat?”
I unlocked it and Jesse walked in. He leaned against the sink, but he didn’t say anything.
“I find a cave to hide in wherever I go.”
He smiled. “Do you want to go home? We can leave tonight if you want.”
I bit my lip. Did I want to go home? It was a surprise to realize I didn’t want to go yet. I walked toward him across the expansive and very fancy guest bathroom, stopping only when my body rested against the length of his. “I want to stay the night.”
He swallowed audibly. “Okay.”
“And tomorrow, will you show me the places where you grew up?”
Chapter 28
Jesse
I was sitting on the edge of my bed when Cat walked out of the bathroom in my suite wearing cotton shorts and a tank top. The sight of her scrubbed-clean face and the vulnerability in her eyes elicited a variety of feelings in me. My chest swelled with it, bigger and bigger, until I could barely breathe.
My fingers itching to touch her, I motioned for her to join me. She sat beside me and I put my arm around her shoulders. “Will you stay with me?” I asked. She would think I was asking her to stay with me for the night, in my room of our suite, and I was, but I was also asking a bigger question.
She tipped her head back so she could see my eyes. Hers were wide and trusting. “I’ll stay with you.”
We pulled back the covers, crawling into the cool, white sheets. Just as I was about to ask her if I could hold her, she scooted close, her pillow right next to mine, and reached out to stroke my cheek. “You’re exhausted,” she said. “Emotionally wrung out.”
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Even after the insanity of the last twenty-four hours, she still saw me. I snaked a hand under her arm, and cupped her cheek. I brushed the pad of my thumb over her soft lower lip. “I love you, Catherine.”
She gasped softly, and her face shifted from surprise to delight. “You do?”
I smiled. “Yes.”
Her eyes turned mischievous. “Good.”
I chuckled lightly.
She moved forward and pressed her mouth to mine, fiercely, claiming me, taking what I offered. She broke our kiss only to say, “I love you, too Jesse. I really do,” before returning to my lips.
I spent the morning driving Cat around the town I grew up in, showing her the stores where James and I bought candy bars and baseball cards, the place we lived with Thomas Relic, and the skate park I basically lived at during middle school. She was now aware that I knew nothing about baseball but just liked to collect things, I wore red converse in high school, and I used to be decent at skateboarding. There was one more place I wanted to show her.
I reached across the console and wound my fingers around hers. “Would you want to meet my mom today?”
“I would love to.” She squeezed my hand. “And I suppose since we love each other, that’s the next logical step.”
I grinned. She’d been making references to our confession off and on all day, and it never got old.
I drove us north to Mom’s house in Santa Barbara, a small bungalow I bought her a few years back. She’d resisted accepting the gift for a long time, and I was relieved when she finally agreed. She wouldn’t put the place behind a gate, which still bothered me, but I’d take what I could get.
The drive was nice, with the windows down and the music low, and Cat’s hand in mine. This was what I’d imagined when I saw my future. Not movies or mansions or luxury travel, but this. Halfway there I pulled the car over on the side of the highway.
“What’s wrong?” Cat asked.
“Not a thing.” I leaned over the console and took her face in mine, giving her a tender kiss and a long hug. Then I got back on the road and continued to drive. She smiled the rest of the way there.
At Mom’s house, I used the garage door opener Mom gave me to open the garage, and pulled my car inside by hers. It wouldn’t be hard for people to figure out where she lived, but so far they hadn’t, and I didn’t want to take chances. I walked around the car to open Cat’s door. She gripped my hand tightly, and I could see the nerves in her eyes.
“We should have called and let her know we were coming,” she said.
“I always drop by.”
“But do you always have your girlfriend with you?”
“No, I don’t. You’re the first woman I’ve brought to meet my mother.”
She searched my eyes, assessing this new information. A slow smile grew on her face. “That’s...I like that.”
Mom appeared in the garage walk door, a big smile on her face. “I hoped you’d come see me while you were in town.” Then her eyes moved to Cat. She blinked, but then brightened and walked forward. “Hello. I’m Poppy.”
“I’m Cat.”
Mom tilted her head slightly. “You work at the cavern?”
“Yes.”
“Jesse mentioned you. But he hasn’t called often enough to fill me in on the details.” She paused there and shot me an annoyed look, before turning back to Cat. “Come in and tell me everything.”
Sitting in Mom’s living room munching on pretzels, Cat did tell her everything. More than I would have, but I expected that. Mom now knew that Cat first thought I was a criminal robbing the cavern, so I thought it only fair that I add in the part where I saw her yelling and throwing a tire iron. That was news to both my mom and Cat, whose face went beet red.
Cat, of course, told her about how I’d rescued her in the cave, and I’d put in my two cents, making sure Mom knew Cat had badgered me into it, and it wasn’t rescuing at all. “Even if he won’t admit he rescued me, it is indisputable that he rescued Mary and Phil, the EMTs, from having to crawl in that little tunnel and pull me out. He got all scratched up, Poppy. Don’t let him tell you he isn’t a hero.”
I rolled my eyes, but I couldn’t help but smile. Not because Cat called me a hero, but because they had become so instantly comfortable with each other. Cat didn’t find it hard to talk to people, but my mom often did, and so to watch the way Cat put her at ease made me happy.
“Come back with us,” Cat said to my mom, startling me.
I cleared my throat. “Cat, we should stay out of it.”
“Nonsense,” Cat said. “I’m going to meddle. Poppy, Otto has been telling me stories about you since I was eleven years old. I know I don’t know you, but I feel like I do, at least a little. His love for you is so deep and so strong, and only his regret is deeper and stronger.”
Mom leaned forward. “He talked to you about his regrets?”
“Vaguely when I was younger, with more detail as I got older. I’m sure I still don’t know most of what happened between you, but I am certain I know how much he loves and misses you.”
“And you and Grandpa are both stubborn mules who can’t admit your mistakes,” I put in.
Mom chuckled a little, then sighed. “I can admit my mistakes, Jesse. I was a dumb kid who fell in love with a controlling and abusive man. When Mom died, I wanted to be loved so badly that I took it from anyone who offered. I pushed away my father and didn’t take his advice because I was angry at him because he couldn’t replace Mom’s love. I never worked through the grief over losing my mother. I can admit all that.” She paused and looked at me, smiling softly. “It’s just a little harder to admit it to him.”
I grabbed her hand and squeezed it gently. “Come back with us. Just for a visit. Say the hard things to him. I have no doubt he’ll have hard things to admit right back to you.”
She pressed her lips flat, and looked around her home. “I haven’t been on a plane in a while. I could go for a little trip.”
Chapter 29
Cat
I stepped out of my car, the late June sun hot on my head, even at this ea
rly hour. My gaze traveled past the white fence and up the hill to Otto’s house, where I could see two people on the porch swing—Otto and Poppy.
When we’d arrived home last night, and Otto came out his front door to greet us, he’d frozen when he saw Poppy. She walked right up to him and put her arms around him, and they’d hugged for a long, long time. By the end of it, both of them were crying, so Jesse and I had gone on a long walk around the edge of the property in order to give them some space.
To see them on the porch like that, sitting close, made me so happy. Everything was right again, or at least on the way toward getting right. Vulnerability was the heart of connection, I thought, and also the hardest thing to do.
I walked to the gift shop door, filled with gratitude for where my own vulnerability had led me. If Jesse wasn’t in there, I would go up to the house and find him. I scanned the gift shop, letting the cool air of the cave wash over my face. He wasn’t here.
“Catherine,” came a loud voice from the cavern. My name echoed through the space, finding its way into the shop, and into my ears.
I walked to the cavern opening, dropping my backpack by the register on the way. Jesse sat in the center of the cavern, on a red picnic blanket beside two plates. He stood when I entered, and stalked across the floor toward me. He put his arms around my waist and pulled me close. “Good morning.”
I pressed a kiss to the side of his neck. Then I stood on tiptoes to kiss his jaw. In answer, he tilted his head down and captured my mouth with his. “I missed you,” I said against his lips.
“I missed you, too, Cat. Any time you’re not with me, I’m missing you.” He kissed me one more time and then pulled me toward the picnic. “I made egg sandwiches. Let’s eat before they get cold.”
Broken Hollywood (Sparrow Sisters Book 1) Page 19
