by Bella Andre
“I’m not.” When her sisters both raised their eyebrows at her quick denial, Cassie said, “I’m not going to deny that they’ve brought out the nurturer in me.” She tried to figure out the best way to explain what she was feeling. “But it’s so much more than that. Ruby is a ball of joy, so of course I love spending time with her. And Flynn—no one has ever seen me the way he does. I’m not talking about my looks, although he does seem to like them quite a bit, which is lovely. But me. Just as I want to understand what makes him tick, he wants to know all the same things about me. And when I’m with him…” She smiled again. “I’ve never been so happy. Or felt so absolutely certain that I’m in exactly the right place, with exactly the person I’m meant to be with. You were trying to get us together from the beginning, Lola, and whatever instinct possessed you to do that, you were right. It might have taken me a little while to come around to the truth, but now I’m one hundred percent certain that he’s the one for me.”
“Wow.” Lola looked more than a little shell-shocked. “And here I thought you were just going to tell us about your night of hot sex. You really are in love with him, aren’t you?”
Cassie nodded. “And he’s in love with me too.”
“Did he say that?” Ashley asked, her eyes huge.
“No.” Cassie plopped down on Lola’s comfy couch. “He’s too busy saying he’s not good enough for me to get those other three words out.”
“Wait a second,” Lola said, holding up her hand before Cassie could say more. “I want to make sure I have everything straight. After a week of will-we-won’t-we, the two of you finally got it on last night, at which point you told Flynn that you’re in love with him, and he said—”
“I should wait for a much ‘better’ guy to come riding in on his white horse for me.”
“I take it he thinks his viewpoint is warranted?” Ashley asked.
“His story isn’t mine to tell,” Cassie said. “But yes, he’s convinced that his past has to define his future. He’s wrong, though. And I was hoping you two might have the magic answers so I can get him to see it.”
Lola held up her hands. “If you’re looking for me to possess some sort of love potion, you’re talking to the wrong girl. The best you’re going to get out of me is a killer dress for your awards ceremony this weekend. Which,” she said as she unzipped it from its hanger, “is ready for your final fitting.”
When Cassie turned to Ashley for input, her sister said, “You know I’m not exactly Little Miss Sunshine when it comes to matters of the heart. And the truth is that I think I understand some of what Flynn is feeling. Because once you’ve screwed up badly enough, you’re never quite convinced that you won’t mess up again just as badly.”
Cassie hated that Ashley was still beating herself up over getting pregnant in high school. “What would it take to convince you to risk your heart again, Ash?”
“The guy would have to be great with Kevin.”
“Obviously,” Cassie said. “But what about you? How would he have to treat you? What would he have to do to break down your walls and make you look at everything in a new light?”
“I’m going to need a few minutes to think that one through,” Ashley said, “so you might as well go put on the dress.”
Cassie went into Lola’s changing area, quickly shed her jeans and shirt, then shimmied into the formfitting dress. Slipping on the heels Lola had thoughtfully sourced for her to wear with it, she tied her hair into a knot in an updo and walked back out.
Both of her sisters whistled. “Damn, you really are gorgeous in my dress.” Lola whipped out her phone and started taking pictures before Cassie could stop her. In any case, she was far more interested in hearing what Ashley had to say.
“Have you come up with an answer yet, Ash?” Cassie asked.
“I’d have to know that the person I was risking my heart for loved me no matter what.” Ashley’s expression was as serious as Cassie had even seen it. “And even if I did screw up because I was scared, or if I tried to push him away—and I’m thinking both of those things are pretty much a given considering my emotional battle scars at this point—he’d have to prove to me that he wasn’t going anywhere. That he had faith in me, and in us, to weather anything that came our way.”
“So you’re not asking for much, then?” Lola teased.
Ashley huffed out a laugh. “I’m certainly not holding my breath that Mr. Perfect is going to show up anytime soon—on a white horse, or otherwise.” She shot Cassie a rueful look. “Sorry I’m not more help.”
“Actually, you’ve been a huge help. Both of you.”
“How?” Lola asked.
“Well, Ashley has confirmed that I was right to tell Flynn this morning that I’m not going to give up on him, no matter what.” She grimaced slightly. “I kind of yelled it at him, actually.”
“You?” Ashley’s eyebrows went up. “Yelling?”
“He was being utterly infuriating and stubborn.”
“I swear, this is getting more interesting by the second,” Lola murmured. “In any case, you were getting to how I’ve helped…?”
“You’ve given me the dress of a lifetime. So even if Flynn believes the right thing to do is keep his distance from me, I’m fully confident that your dress will make him lose control again. If I can convince Flynn to go with me to Portland for the awards ceremony, will you guys help Mom watch Ruby? I know he came to Maine with Ruby for the chance to be anonymous, but maybe if he knows he has our support, he’ll consider trying to live a normal life where he doesn’t have to wear glasses and baseball caps and sit in corners every time he goes out.”
“I’d love to help,” Ashley said. “And Kevin will be thrilled to get to spend more time with her.”
“As long as I don’t have to change diapers,” Lola said, “I’m in too. In fact, I’ve been mulling over creating some fabric for a girls’ line. Ruby would be the perfect model.”
“Great. I’ll text Mom to make sure she’s free too, in case Flynn says yes. Now I just need to figure out a way to get him on board with my plan.” Cassie looked down at her dress. “Maybe I should wear this when I ask him, in case I need to seduce him into going to the ceremony with me.”
“I know I’ve teased you more than once about making more of your sex appeal,” Lola said, “but you’ve always led with your heart. Regardless of how great your night was in the sack with Flynn, it’s your huge heart that he’s fallen for. And it’s that same big heart that is going to make him realize that he doesn’t have to beat himself up anymore over his past, because you’re always going to be there to love him.”
“I agree one million percent,” Ashley said. “You’ve got one of the biggest hearts of anyone I’ve ever known. Flynn would have to be a fool to throw that away…even if there’s a little yelling, here or there,” she added with a teasing glint in her eyes.
“But just in case there do need to be some sexy hijinks along the way to convince Flynn to see sense—” Lola went over to one of her cabinets, pulled out a couple of condoms, and gave them to Cassie. “Now you’re ready for anything.”
Cassie eyes were wet as she hugged her sisters. “I love you guys.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Flynn was sure that Beth Sullivan would see the truth of what he’d done with her daughter when he dropped Ruby off at her house. But Cassie’s mother was all smiles and obviously overjoyed to see Ruby again.
Soon, he was in the library, his laptop open. Only today, instead of staring at the blank screen, he couldn’t get the words down fast enough.
The ten-year-old boy is wearing a dirty shirt and pants. He’s sitting alone on the playground of his elementary school, a rough place full of bullies who’ve learned everything they know from their even rougher parents.
He’s deep inside his head, making up stories of other worlds, of anywhere but here, when he sees her. A pretty little girl with a wide smile, walking onto the playground. She doesn’t seem to notice the bullies�
�and certainly doesn’t seem to be afraid of them—as she heads for him.
“Hi. I’m Cassie. I’m new here. What’s your name?”
The boy blinks at her as though she’s speaking a foreign language, before answering. “Joe.” His voice sounds funny, like he isn’t used to talking much.
“Want to play, Joe?”
Too stunned to do anything else, Joe follows her over to the swings he never uses.
Cassie, already swinging, asks, “What’s your favorite color?”
Joe is still sitting on the swing with his feet flat on the ground as he replies, “I don’t have one.” It’s a lie—he loves the color green, but he doesn’t want her to make fun of him like everyone else does. He’s pretty sure ten-year-old boys aren’t supposed to still have favorite colors.
Cassie smiles at him, seemingly not bothered by his response as she hops off her swing to push him on his. “Mine is pink and purple polka dots.”
Joe is stunned by how strong she is as she sends him soaring on the swing. It’s been so long since he’s felt like he’s flying, like he’s free. “That’s not a color.”
“I know. It’s lots of colors, which is even better! Do you want to know a secret?”
Of course he does. But he’s afraid she’ll make him tell her his secrets, so he shakes his head.
She doesn’t let that stop her. “My elephant is the one with all those colors.”
Joe turns to look at her from the swing. “You have an elephant?”
“Want to come home with me today to meet her? Because she told me she wants to meet you.”
He can’t figure out how Cassie could possibly have an elephant, let alone one who talks. But even if he could, he hasn’t been to anyone’s house in a long time and doesn’t have any friends anymore. Not since things have gotten even worse at his house. He can’t see why someone like Cassie would want to have anything to do with him. And if the other kids think she’s his friend, they’ll treat her badly too. He needs to say no, if only to save her from potential harm.
But just as he’s about to shake his head again, he hears the sound of her laughter. That’s when he realizes that she has hopped onto her swing and is soon flying just as high in the sky as he is.
Her laughter is what finally pulls the truth from him. “Yes. I want to come home with you. And meet your elephant.”
Flynn’s fingers stilled on his keyboard. He’d never felt like that while working on a screenplay before—like he was simply taking dictation.
And it wasn’t until he read through what he’d just written that he realized what he’d named the protagonist of his story.
Joe.
It was tempting to change the name, to back away from the truth like he always had before. But he’d told Cassie today he was done lying to her, and he knew deep inside himself that it wasn’t enough to stop lying only to her. He needed the courage to tell the truth to everyone from this point forward. He owed it not only to Cassie, but to Ruby.
One day, Ruby was going to be a ten-year-old on schoolyard swings, and it was his job to teach her how to be honest and friendly when she got there, rather than withdrawn and wary, the way he’d been. More than anything, he wanted Ruby to know joy.
He’d asked Cassie to teach it to him so that he could pass that knowledge on to his little girl. But when he’d finally let Cassie’s joy take him over completely for one perfect night, come morning he had immediately pushed her away.
Not that she’d let him push her far. On the contrary, she’d said she wasn’t going to let him disappear on her. That she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him and Ruby.
He rubbed his hand over the tightness in his chest as he thought about the apology he owed her. Not only for the way he’d behaved today—but also because he couldn’t shake his fear that if he dared give his heart to her, he’d only end up hurting them both in the end.
One thing was certain, at the very least: He couldn’t write another word until Cassie knew how sorry he was and that none of his behavior was her fault.
Having left his car at her mother’s house, Flynn practically sprinted the three blocks from the library to Cassie’s workshop.
He hadn’t even made it two hours without needing to be with her. How the hell was he going to go back to the opposite coast? Especially when he knew Ruby would miss her just as much.
He rang the bell, and when Cassie opened the door to her workshop, she looked so beautiful that there was only one thing he could think to do, only one possible option left, no matter how many times he told himself he couldn’t have her.
Flynn kissed Cassie the way he wanted to kiss her every time she laughed and made his heart dance inside his chest.
He kissed her the way he wanted to kiss her whenever she was playing with Ruby and giving his little girl the love he’d never known himself.
He kissed her the way he wished he could tell her he loved her too.
When he finally lifted his mouth from hers, her skin was flushed and her eyes bright. The next thing he knew, she was pulling him inside, locking the door behind them, then jumping into his arms in the hallway.
She was so damned sweet as she wrapped her legs around his hips. He craved everything about her. Her luscious lips beneath his. The little gasps she gave when he lightly bit one of her earlobes. How tender, how wonderfully sensitive, the skin was along her neck as he ran his tongue down it.
“Flynn.”
He loved the way she said his name. Like she was already on the edge of coming apart for him.
Desperate to feel her pleasure, and to give her the same joy she’d always given him, he was unbuttoning and unzipping her jeans when he realized he didn’t have any protection with him.
Because he’d promised himself he wouldn’t touch her again.
“Don’t stop,” she urged him, putting her hand over his and sliding it lower.
Holy hell. She was so hot, so wet, so ready for him. And when she kissed him like that, her tongue dancing with his, her teeth nipping wickedly at his lower lip, he was nearly lost again. But he couldn’t hurt her, would never forgive himself if he did.
“I don’t have any protection.” He barely managed to get the words out when all he wanted to do was keep kissing her. And to love her with everything he was.
“I do.” She reached around to her back pocket and pulled out shiny foil packets. “Not just one, but two!”
She looked so triumphant that he had to kiss her again. And give silent thanks that, inexplicably, she had two condoms in her pocket.
Together, they worked to strip off her clothes before tearing off his. Soon, she was ripping open the first packet.
“I wanted to be the one to put this on you last night,” she said in a husky voice, nearly stealing what was left of his control by sliding it on him. “I’m glad I didn’t have to wait long for my turn.” When she was done, she lifted her eyes back to his. “I can’t wait to love you again.”
“I can’t wait either.”
She put her hands around his neck and re-wrapped her legs around his waist. “Then don’t.”
Before she could take her next breath, he was inside of her. She arched her breasts into his waiting mouth, where he laved first one, then the other. Soon, her breasts were flushed and damp from both his tongue and the light scrape of his teeth over her beautiful skin.
Somewhere in the back of his head, he knew he should be gentler with her, that she couldn’t be used to someone like him, someone from the wrong side of town who had never learned how to be soft or gentle.
Only to realize that he was the one working to keep up with her. And when she begged him to take her harder, faster, higher, how could he do anything but give her everything she wanted?
Making Cassie happy was the only thing that mattered. And even if he still wasn’t convinced that he could make her happy for the rest of her life, at least when they were both naked and in each other’s arms, he had no doubts.
When her climax finally to
ok them both over, her laughter as she clung to him had him smiling against the top of her head.
And wishing that he could bottle this feeling and hold it forever.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
“I came to say I’m sorry for being a jerk—a stubborn one—this morning.”
Cassie lifted her face from the crook of Flynn’s neck. He smelled so good and felt even better as he held her so tightly. As though he never wanted to let go of her.
She smiled as she looked down at their naked bodies. “Apology accepted.”
His surprised laughter sounded like heaven. Only Ruby’s laughter was as beautiful, and as precious, to Cassie.
“This wasn’t how I planned on saying it.” His expression grew serious as he brushed the hair back from her face. “I—” He stopped himself. “Maybe we should put our clothes on so that I’m not so tempted to put that second condom to use.”
She would happily have stayed naked with him and used that second condom, but it was obvious that he had something important to say.
Reluctantly, she unwrapped her legs from around his waist. But though her feet were on the ground again, she still felt as though she were flying.
That was what being with Flynn did to her—he lifted her up higher than anyone, or anything, ever had.
How she wished she could do the same for him…
Minutes later, they were fully clothed and sitting on the stools in her workshop with cups of freshly brewed tea. Flynn hadn’t said anything while she’d been heating up the water and getting out the tea bags. She’d remained silent to let him get his thoughts together.
Now, he took both of her hands in his and said, “I never expected to meet anyone like you. Especially not after becoming a father in the blink of an eye. I’m not telling you this to make excuses for my behavior. You deserve so much better than the way I acted this morning after we woke up. But I need you to know that whatever I do, it’s not because you’re anything less than perfect. It’s not because I don’t want to be with you. It’s not because I don’t…” His grip tightened on her hands as he cut himself off. “I care about you, Cassie. So damned much. And to hear that you want to be with me and Ruby—I honestly can’t believe it. I wish…” He lifted her hands to his lips and pressed kisses to them. “I wish I could make you promises. I wish I could be the man you deserve. But up until four weeks ago, when Ruby came into my life, I was nothing more than a selfish shell of a man.”
