by Tamie Dearen
“Right. We’ll have a fabulous time, I’m sure. Please give my regards to the Kleins.”
“I will, I promise.” At his glum expression she added, “Johanna mentioned something about Alexander wanting to talk business. You should call him tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Ms. Best.” Everyone else in the elevator remained quiet. They all seemed to be listening to their exchange. Surely once this conversation spread around Gherring Inc. it would quell all the rumors about their relationship.
Anne was waiting in the lobby for Johanna when Steven came downstairs in his tux. Her heart leaped in her chest. He was achingly handsome in a tuxedo. For a moment she tried to decide whether he was more handsome in a tuxedo or in a towel. But the pounding of her heart reminded her this was a dangerous thought pattern.
“You look very sharp, Mr. Gherring,” she said sincerely. “I hope you have a good time tonight. You know, I’m really glad you’re keeping an open mind about this. Ellen could be the one.” She wondered at the way her heart clenched when she said those words.
“And that would make you happy? You’d be happy if I was with Ellen?”
“Yes, I… I really, truly just want you to be happy. Whatever it takes. That’ll make me happy. So yes, I’d be happy if you and Ellen were together, if she’s the one who can do that for you.”
“And it wouldn’t bother you?”
“Of course not. I mean, I’m the one who wanted the two of you to date, right?”
“That’s right. You’re the one who wanted it.” He tightened his lips, closing his eyes for a moment. “Have fun at the Christmas tree lighting.”
“Oh I will—I can’t wait. Just imagine, a bazillion lights coming on all at once. I’ve seen it on TV, but never in person. I’m going to take a video on my phone and send it to Charlie and Emily. They’ll be so jealous. And the weather is perfect. It’s going to be so beautiful.”
Steven smiled a bit dejectedly. “I wish I could be there to see it.”
“Surely you’ve seen it plenty of times. It wouldn’t be exciting for you.”
“No,” he said. “I wish I could be there to see you see it for the first time.”
“Oh!” Anne cried with thousands of others as the huge Christmas tree sprung to life with over thirty thousand lights. She joined in the cheers and clapping, forgetting she was taking a phone video as she jumped up and down with glee. Johanna and Alexander seemed to enjoy watching Anne as much as the tree. They stayed for thirty minutes until the show was over and the crowds began to disperse.
“Will you take my picture with the tree in the background? I want to prove I was actually here.”
Alexander snapped several pictures of Anne and Johanna together with the glowing tree in the background. Then they walked a block away to their dinner reservation. Anne was engrossed in the stories of Johanna’s grandchildren—a set of twin boys, aged three, and a one-year-old girl. She totally forgot about Steven and Ellen on their inaugural date. Two glasses of wine also contributed to her relaxation. But over dessert, Johanna asked a few probing questions about her love life.
“How is Henri? Are you two still an item? And most importantly, are there sparks?”
Anne hesitated. “I know I emailed you about my dad’s accident and me not getting to go to Paris.”
“Yes, and you told me your father is expected to make a full recovery. I am so glad.” She reached out to touch Anne’s hand. “Did things not go well with your father?”
“No, it’s not that. It’s just that… I didn’t go to Paris. And now, something is different between Henri and me. He’s coming here this weekend. I guess I don’t feel those sparks with him. But then I think maybe I would if we spent time together. He’s incredibly good-looking.” She glanced up at Alexander. “I’m sorry to put you through this. Your wife is a good counselor.”
He laughed. “I am accustomed to this. Back home, Johanna is die Liebe Arzt—the ‘Love Doctor.’”
“But what were you going to say?” urged Johanna.
“I just feel like Henri and I will never be anything but friends. But I don’t want to tell him that right now, not when he’s dealing with his niece who has cancer.”
“I don’t think you mentioned that. How terrible… His niece?”
“Yes. His sister and her two kids live with him, so he’s practically her father instead of her uncle. And she’s only seven.”
“And they just found out? About the cancer?”
“Yes. So you see why he needs me right now?”
“He is coming this weekend, and you will see him in person? Right? If the sparks are not there, you must tell him the truth. He needs the sparks as much as you.”
“You’re probably right,” she agreed, but she felt like a heel. She couldn’t break his heart at a time like this.
“But you have not told me about Steven Gherring.”
“What about him?” Blood rushed to her face, and she concentrated on her plate.
“The last time I was here, I told you I thought he might be attracted to you. It was the way he looked at you when you were dancing together. Was I right?”
Anne could feel her pulse in her temples. “No… I mean… it depends on what you mean by attracted. He… he—”
“Yes, I see.”
“You see what?”
“With Steven Gherring, there are sparks,” she said with a smug smile.
“Not the kind of sparks that mean anything. He may have kissed me, but he’s the world’s richest playboy. He’s kissed plenty of women.”
“I see.”
“And tonight, for instance, I set him up on a date with one of my friends. And he really likes her. Would I do that if I was in love with Steven Gherring?”
“Interesting leap you made. I asked if there were sparks. I did not ask if you were in love with Steven Gherring.” She chuckled at Anne’s gasp. “But I do not know why you would set him up with your friend. Why did you do that?”
“Because… because he needs someone who’ll love him and take care of him. Someone he can start a family with. He deserves the kind of love I had with Tom. I want that for him.”
“I see.” Johanna smiled.
“You see what?” Anne demanded.
“I just see. That is enough.” She patted Anne’s hand. “Do not worry, we will talk again. Alexander and I will be here several days.”
“Hi Anne.” Rayna greeted her when she came in. “Where’ve you been?”
“I went to see the Christmas tree lighting ceremony at Rockefeller. It was amazing.”
“Were you on a date?”
“Hardly,” laughed Anne. “I was just the third wheel—I went with a couple that are visiting from Germany.”
“Sounds fun.”
Anne asked casually, “Did you see Mr. Gherring? I mean, has he come back from his benefit dinner?”
“Sure. He’s been back for an hour.”
“Did he look like he was happy? Like he had a good time? Or was he in a bad mood?”
“I don’t know. He’s so serious all the time. I think he’s always in a bad mood.”
“He’s not like that, really. He’s really fun and witty, if you get to know him.”
“Okay, honey, no offense. He’s kind of my boss, since Gherring Inc. owns this building. So I’m a little afraid of him.”
“I’ll admit he’s a little intimidating.” Anne covered her mouth as a huge yawn escaped. “I’m beat. I’m headed up to bed. Goodnight, Rayna.”
Anne had just opened her apartment door when her cell phone rang. It was Steven, and he never called late at night.
“Hello? Mr. Gherring?”
“Anne, I’m sorry to impose. Are you already asleep?”
“No, I just walked in the door. What did you need?”
“I really need to check something at the office, and I can’t get my laptop to turn on. Would you mind bringing yours upstairs for just a minute?”
“Sure, I’ll be right there.”
; Anne threw her coat and gloves off and grabbed her laptop, heading for the penthouse apartment. She knocked on the door and Steven opened it immediately, blocking the doorway. He was still in his tuxedo pants, but his tie was off and his shirt was unbuttoned, hanging open. His chest was almost more appealing when only partially exposed, like a teasing entreaty. She had an insane urge to put out her hand and feel those firm muscles. She felt that familiar tingle as his fingertips brushed against hers when he took the laptop from her hands. He opened it and made the connection to the office computer, pulling up his daily schedule.
He muttered something about checking his schedule for the next day. “That’s good. I don’t have anything scheduled during lunch.”
“I could’ve told you that. I almost never schedule anything during your lunch. It’s too important for you to eat well.”
Steven turned around and took a few steps inside. “Good news, Ellen. I’m open for lunch tomorrow.”
Anne’s eyes followed Steven's. They stopped when they fell on Ellen, sitting on Steven's soft leather sofa with a glass of red wine in her hand. Her expression, as she returned Anne’s gaze, was incredibly awkward.
Anne’s eyes took in the atmosphere. Ellen’s bare feet, her sexy dress, the wine, Steven’s open shirt, and soft music on the stereo. With something the size of a boulder wedged in her throat, Anne turned around slowly and walked away. Steven's voice called after her, but she kept going. Eyes watering, she bypassed the elevator and took the stairs, the sound of each step echoing in the stairwell like the emptiness of her heart.
Steven and Ellen are together, just like I planned. Why am I not excited?
In a daze, she got ready for bed, but lay awake, the scene with Ellen and Steven playing over and over in her mind.
When did I start thinking of him as Steven, instead of Mr. Gherring?
She knew in her head that Ellen would be able to make him happy in ways that she couldn’t, like the possibility they could have children together. And Anne had been responsible for introducing them, in the first place. So she needed to get her head straight and stop feeling sorry for herself, wishing for something that could never be.
It’s the best possible outcome for both of them. I’m going to be happy about it. I have to be.
Wednesday, Thursday, Friday
The next morning Anne’s bed covers looked like they’d been in a tug of war battle and lost. When she woke up at five a.m., she knew sleep was a lost cause. She made a cup of hot tea, poured it into an insulated mug, and headed to work without attempting to put food into her churning stomach.
Arriving at the office, she was so early the night guard had to let her inside. She sat down and started into her backlog of work, gaining some level of satisfaction from her productive activity.
She tried hard not to imagine what must have happened after she left Steven and Ellen alone in his apartment—that really wasn’t her business.
But it confirmed what she’d been thinking—Steven expected the women he dated to meet his physical needs, and that wasn’t something Anne was willing to do outside of marriage. Yet another confirmation that she could never be the right match for him.
Afraid of any interaction with Steven, Anne called Katie over the minute she stepped off the elevator.
“Sit down. I need some advice.” Anne pulled up a chair for her and started asking her every question she could conjure.
Her ploy worked, for when Steven arrived, she was still deep in conversation with Katie. He stopped at her desk, as if waiting for an opening to speak.
“Yes sir? Did you need something?” she asked without quite making eye contact.
“I wanted to thank you for your help.” He opened his attaché case and pulled out her computer. “You left before I could return this.”
“I was happy to help you.” Anne hoped she’d succeeded in sounding normal. She certainly couldn’t let him suspect she’d felt jealous after seeing him with Ellen. She had to act as if nothing were wrong.
“Gary said he needs to talk to you about the manager for the second property.” Katie told Steven, as she pushed her chair back and stood up.
“You’re not leaving, are you?” Pulse racing, Anne grabbed Katie’s arm.
“I’ve got a lot to do before noon.” Katie stood up. “Besides, you’ve got this stuff down pat.”
With growing dread, she watched Katie walk away, unaware that she was leaving Anne in a perilous situation. At least she and Steven were out in the common area and not alone in his office.
He cleared his throat, but she kept her eyes glued to her computer. “Did you need something else, Mr. Gherring? I’ve got a lot on my plate today.”
“I wanted to be sure you’re okay. You left in a hurry last night. Like you might’ve been upset.”
“I’m fine.” She gave him a toothy smile, hoping he didn’t notice her lips trembling. “Why would I be upset?”
“You weren’t upset about seeing me with Ellen?”
“Now that would be pretty ridiculous, wouldn’t it? After all, I’m the one who set the two of you up.”
“Then why did you run off last night?”
“Because… I…” Come on, brain. Make up a good excuse. “Because I didn’t want to intrude on your date. Seemed like the two of you were getting pretty cozy.”
His brows knitted. “You weren’t bothered by it?”
“Bothered? Do you mean hot-and-bothered? Are you fishing for complements? Asking if I noticed your shirt was unbuttoned last night?”
He frowned harder. “That’s not what—”
“Yes, Mr. Gherring, I noticed. It was hard to miss.” She scrunched her left eye closed in an exaggerated wink.
He leaned forward and planted both hands on her desk. “Anne, I think it’s time for us to have that talk.”
“Aren’t we talking now, Mr. Gherring?”
“You know what I mean. We need to talk about what happened between us.”
Ah-ha! That’s what he’s after—he’s afraid I have expectations of a relationship, just because he kissed me. How do I set his mind at ease so he can move on without feeling guilty?
She was still trying to form an answer in her head when the elevator doors opened and Michelle stepped out.
“Steven!” With a sob, she scurried to him and threw her arms around his neck. “Steven, it didn’t work. You have to help me. Please! Can we talk in private?” She cast red-rimmed eyes in Anne’s direction.
He peeled Michelle’s hands from his neck as he glanced toward Anne. “Michelle, this isn’t a good time. Anne and I were talking about something important.”
“But you’re the only one who understands me.” Michelle hooked his arm and dragged him toward his office door.
He halted at the entrance and turned back to Anne. “This conversation isn’t over.”
That was all the warning Anne needed. She had to find a place to hide for the rest of the day.
She called Jared and arranged to spend the entire morning training with him in the CMA department. Sending him off to lunch at twelve, she hid herself at Shanna Matheson’s unoccupied desk.
She tried to concentrate on work, because thought of Steven kept invading her brain. What was she going to do about him? Whatever happened, she absolutely, positively couldn’t let herself be alone in a private place with Steven Gherring again.
The only logical conclusion to a physical relationship with Steven was to either stand by her convictions and experience frustration, or give in to temptation and experience temporary physical pleasure, followed by guilt and self-condemnation. She’d made her decision. Now she just had to learn to live with it.
When Jared returned from lunch, he brought something for her to eat. She thanked him profusely for the thoughtful gesture and pretended to eat something. But the thought of actually swallowing food made her gag.
When she asked Jared to check her work, he whistled.
“You did all that today? If you keep this up, they’ll fire
me and Shanna, both.”
“So it looks correct?”
“It looks perfect. Why don’t you take a break? You look a little tired.”
“No, I want to tackle the yearly estimates, taking the tax changes into account.”
“We usually let the Accounting Department do that.”
“I’m not sure. But I think my new department is supposed to cover that as well. Anyway, I’m going to try—”
“No, you’re not,” Steven's voice rang out behind her. “You’re not expected to do that report. And it’s time you took a break to eat something.”
“You were right, boss—she didn’t touch the lunch I brought her.”
Anne glared at Jared, but he grinned, shrugging. “Sorry, Anne. Us guys have to stick together. Besides, he pays me.”
“Did you even have breakfast?” Steven demanded.
“It’s none of your business what I do or don’t eat,” she pouted. “What do you care anyway, as long as I get the work done?”
Steven’s face grew red and the veins stood out on his neck until it looked as if he might explode.
“That’s my cue. I’m outta here.” Jared melted out the door.
“I think I’ve shown I care what happens to you,” Steven said evenly. “Now I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that, and I’m going to ask my question again. Did you eat breakfast today?”
“You don’t understand. I can’t eat. My stomach is upset.”
“What about water? Did you drink anything today? Why am I bothering to ask?” Steven disappeared and came back moments later with two bottles of water.
“Thank you. But it’s not like I was going to die.” She forced down a sip of water. “I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time, without any help from you or anyone else.”
“And evidently doing a poor job of it.” He started pacing, stopping every so often to glare at her until she obediently swallowed some water. “I meet you after forty-five years, and it turns out you’re only alive by lucky happenstance.”
