"Okay. I'm leaving now. I hope things work out between you and Moody. He's a good man, Bailey." His praise surprised me, considering the fight they'd just had. "This fight between the two of us was nothing, honey. It's how we handle shit. We fight it out. Men like us are very territorial when it comes to our women. Moody was right, I knew better than to crawl into bed with you."
There was a minute of silence, but I sensed that Cole was still standing on the other side of the door.
"One thing you should hold on to, Bailey--Moody cares about you deeply, or he wouldn't have given a fuck about finding us in bed together. You've made him different, in a good way, sweetheart," he chuckled. "Hell, before you I'd never heard the man put a complete sentence together. He just went around grunting and growling, and he didn't care about anything or anyone. What Maggie did damn near ruined him. She took his whole family when she took her life. His son Jacob, their unborn daughter…he shut down."
Unborn daughter?
By the time Cole had finished, tears were running freely down my cheeks. I couldn't speak, I was so choked up. This was the first that I’d heard that Maggie had been pregnant when she'd died. What Moody must have gone through…I could barely handle the thought of the pain and suffering he must have endured.
After a few minutes I heard Cole leave my apartment. I wondered if Moody knew how good of a friend he was. It seemed unlikely that two men could fight like the two of them had and come out of it still friends. I had a lot to learn about bikers and their world, and I had to make up my mind about whether or not I could handle the way they dealt with what life handed them. Could I overlook the fighting, the killing, the hard-core life that Moody obviously lived?
I stared long and hard at the woman I saw staring back at me in the mirror. Was I strong enough? And the answer came to me, so plain and clear that it lifted the heavy cloud of doubt surrounding me, leaving me with a feeling of hope for a future with the man I loved.
Chapter 37
Bailey
Three weeks! Three damned weeks, and I hadn't heard a single word from Moody. He hadn't even come into the bar during all that time, and I was growing more furious by the day. When I'd told him that I’d needed him gone, I hadn't meant forever. When I'd told him that I’d needed time alone, I hadn't meant this much time. I'd expected him to at least call me, and when he hadn't I’d begun to look for him anxiously at the Naked Lady every night, like a junkie in need of their next fix. Only Moody was my drug of choice, and I was having serious withdrawals.
The earlier fears that I’d harbored that he would walk away and never look back seemed to be coming true. What else was I supposed to think after all this time? I knew that there were so many ways I could have reached out to him, but wasn't the man supposed to make the first move? Just as I was about to throw in the towel, call him and demand what the hell was going on, Tommy informed me that Moody had been away on a job.
What? All this time? What kind of job? Was it dangerous? When would he be back? All of those questions and more I'd thrown at Tommy, but in his usual, sometimes annoying way, he'd thrown his hands up in the air and said, "I don't know the details, only that Moody is in New Mexico somewhere."
I'd clamped my mouth shut with irritation and finished my shift, damning Tommy for not knowing more and damning Moody for being his usual, cold-hearted self.
"Are you almost done in there, honey?"
I stared down at the pregnancy stick in my hand, tears blurring my eyes, and opened the door.
Holly had come home the day before, and now she glanced down at the proof that I was pregnant. I'd revealed my suspicions to her earlier, and she'd run right out and bought a pregnancy test so that I could find out right away. Her eyes slowly returned to mine. "Oh, honey, are you okay?" she asked cautiously. "Of course you aren't okay!" She answered her own question, taking in my pale face and tears. "How do you feel?"
I wasn't surprised that I was pregnant, considering that Moody hadn't worn protection when we’d been together, and I’d spent nearly every morning for the last few weeks hugging the toilet bowl. I'd had plenty of time to think about how I would feel if it turned out that I was pregnant, but now that it was a reality, a whole cauldron of issues came crashing down at me at once. Was I ready to have a baby? Would I be a good mother? Did I tell Moody? How would he feel about becoming a father again? What if he didn't want to have another child? Would I be left to raise our child on my own?
I was suddenly overwhelmed with the what-ifs, and I let Holly lead me to the couch. I was going to have a baby! Moody's baby. My hand covered my belly. My baby. A tiny little human was growing in my belly right now. Suddenly, and just like that, my world changed for the better, even if that knowledge scared the shit out of me at the same time.
"Honey, take a deep breath," Holly suggested as we sat down. She reached for the tissue box on the coffee table in front of us and handed it to me. "Can I get you anything?"
Yeah, a drink, something with alcohol would be nice, though I knew that I wouldn't be partaking in anything like that for at least the next seven or eight months. Longer if I decided to breast feed.
I grabbed a couple of tissues, shaking my head. "I'll be okay." My words were muffled behind the tissue I was using to blow my nose. "I think I'm just in shock. I mean, I kind of thought I may be pregnant, the signs were there, but I never really thought it could be true." I gave her a serious look. "Am I ready to be a mother?"
"Of course you are!" she gushed, pulling me into a hug. "You'll be an awesome mom."
I made a pitiful attempt to laugh. "And you'll make an awesome aunt." I hesitated. "I'm a little scared, Holly. I knew I'd have kids one day, I've always wanted them, but the circumstances aren't exactly the best. I'm not sure how Moody is going to take this, or if he even wants to be a father again."
"Again?"
I stared at her, suddenly realizing that she hadn't heard his story, so I told her the short version, which aided in keeping the tears flowing.
"Oh, my God, that's awful!" she exclaimed.
She didn't seem to know what to say after that. We sat there in silence for a minute while I dried my eyes and blew my nose again. I balled the tissue up, took a deep breath, and then looked over at Holly assuredly. "I can do this," I said quietly. "With or without Moody."
She nodded, smiling. "Absolutely! And I'll be there to help you.
Her offer made me wonder what her situation with Sax was. She hadn't told me the full details about the fight they'd had, just as I hadn't told her about all the drama that she'd missed while she'd been staying at the Desert Devils’ clubhouse. Normally we shared everything, but some things were just too difficult to talk about.
"So when are you going to tell Moody?"
"I don't know. This isn't something you share over the phone, and since he's in New Mexico on a job, I'll have to wait until he decides to contact me." I was still miffed that he hadn't already. Did I mean so little to him? Had he even worried about me?
Without warning, there was a loud pounding on the door. Startled, we exchanged a quick look, and then Holly went to the door. She took a quick peek in the peephole, her mouth twisting down with annoyance as she opened the door.
"What do you want?"
Sax pushed his way past her and into the room. "You and I need to talk, woman," he snapped with a seriously determined expression. It was clear that he was all hyped up.
"Woman?" Holly hissed, closing the door behind him.
"That's right, baby. You're my woman, and we need to get some shit straight right fucking now."
So, he'd come to lay down the law. This was going to be interesting. I raised my brows at his words. Holly's eyes shifted to me briefly, and I could tell that she’d been momentarily struck speechless. The possessiveness in Sax's tone was palpable. He cast a glance at me, finally realizing that they weren't alone in the room. I gave him a tiny smile.
He returned it, but I could tell that he didn't mean it. "Hi, sweetheart," he said, befo
re turning back to Holly.
During the brief exchange Holly had pulled herself together, and the look on her face revealed that she was going to give it to him. "We are not together, asshole!" she snapped, poking Sax in his chest with each passionately uttered word. "Your little episode with that slut in the kitchen is a deal breaker!"
Ohmygod, had Sax cheated on Holly?
Sax's face turned red, and I wondered if it was from anger or embarrassment. His next actions revealed which emotion had a grip on him. He reached for Holly's hand. "Let's go, we need privacy—"
She pulled back. "I'm not going anywhere with you. I know what I saw, Sax, and I told you we’re over. It was fun—"
Sax released a low growl, pressed his lips, and the next thing I knew he bent down and lifted Holly into a fireman's hold. He turned and headed for her bedroom.
"Put me down, asshole!" Holly muttered, pounding on his wide back. "I mean it, Sax!"
If I'd thought that Sax planned to hurt Holly I would have intervened, but it was obvious that he cared for her. Why else would he be there? And I knew that, deep down; Holly was crazy for him, too. Still, I hollered after them, "If I hear any screaming, I'm calling the police!" It was a hollow threat.
Releasing a sigh, I got to my feet and went to the kitchen. I opened the fridge and peered inside, hungry and looking for something to eat. My gaze lit on the variety of options--leftover Chinese food from the night before, the remains of a pot roast from two days ago, yogurt, bagels, and something in a covered bowl. I didn't know what it was, and so far, nothing else had appealed to me. I reached for the bowl and uncovered it to discover rank, old tuna fish. As soon as the smell hit me I gagged, and quickly covered the bowl back up. My hand flew to my stomach as I fought back the urge to throw up.
A knock at the door momentarily distracted me, and I went to see who it was. I didn't check the peephole first and pulled the door open, coming face-to-face with Moody. I let out an audible gasp, meeting the hard look in his eyes. As usual, his stoic expression was hard to read. I uttered the first thing that came to my mind. "You came back." Even I could hear the surprise in my voice.
He came back! A feeling of elation surged through me as I let my eyes roam over his tall, mouth-watering build. He was striking as ever, his rugged face tanned and set in stone, no sign left of the black eye that Cole had given him. His sensuous lip had healed. Hair that was a little longer and windblown rested against his collar, his dark clothes and cut appearing a little rumpled and dusty. Had he returned home and come straight to me? I’d like to think that he had.
The closest thing to a smile that he could manage brought the corner of his hard mouth up. "You said you wanted time," he said, drawing my eyes back up to his. "Did I give you enough? Because I have to warn you, baby, if I hadn't had a job in New Mexico to keep me away from you, nothing would have."
I started to smile, and then the nausea that I'd been suffering the last few weeks hit me with a vengeance. My hand flew up to my mouth, and I spun around and headed for the bathroom. The sound of me throwing up was magnified in the small bathroom. The dry heaves were even worse. At some point I was aware of Moody coming in and holding my hair back as I stared down into the toilet bowl. When it was clear that I was done, he wet a washcloth and wiped my face down. I was grateful, but embarrassed, aware that my breath was probably putrid.
"That happy to see me, huh?"
Laughing softly, I nodded. "This isn't how I’d envisioned telling you hello," I joked. When he stepped back I took a minute to brush my teeth and rinse out my mouth, avoiding his eyes.
"Funny, I left with the sound of you throwing up, and I come back to the same thing."
I didn't have the guts to say anything about the baby right then.
"You okay now?" His eyes narrowed on me, and I could tell that he was thinking about something.
I nodded again, wiping my face with a hand towel. "All good." My mouth trembled with a weak smile as my eyes fell to Moody's smooth lips. God, how I wanted him to kiss me, to take my mouth in the usual, hard, ravishing way that he liked, and kiss me until I was breathless, until we were both satisfied and had had enough. But I wondered if that was even possible. I’d never get enough of this impossible man.
Our eyes locked, and I recognized the exact moment when his concern turned to hunger. It was a look that turned me on instantly.
Hot.
Explosive.
Consuming.
"I missed you," he surprised me by saying.
"I missed you, too." So much, I wanted to add. "When I didn’t hear from you I started to think that you were done with me."
That seemed to sober him, the look in his dark eyes intensifying. "Never, Bailey," he rasped, finally doing what I wanted and pulling me against him. "I did a lot of thinking these last few weeks. I tried to convince myself that I didn't need you, didn’t want you. That you were just an employee I was fucking and it would run its course. But the fucking truth is, I can't imagine my life without you in it. You're in my blood."
I liked the sound of that. His passionate words brought tears to my eyes, but I fought them back. "Could have fooled me," I began in a low tone. "I know I told you I needed space, but you left so fast that you didn't even take the time to tell me if Martin was still a threat."
"Baby, I'm sorry about that, but no matter how angry you were with me, I would never have left you alone had he still been out there. And you were never alone. I had eyes watching out for you the whole time I was away."
My mouth dropped open with surprise. "What? Wh--Who? Where?"
"I hired a brother from the Desert Devils to provide protection for you where ever you went. When you were home, he was just outside. When you were at work, he was there. He kept me informed daily."
I thought about what Moody had just revealed and thought back to the times that I’d been at work in the past few weeks. Come to think of it, there had been a biker wearing the Desert Devils’ cut who had seemed to become a regular. He would always sit at the same booth, against the wall, sipping a beer, and flirting outrageously with Alisha. I'd thought at one time that she had her sights on Moody, but after seeing the way she flirted back with the biker, I'd naturally assumed that he was her boyfriend. I'd never seen him near the apartment, though.
"Why didn't I know that?"
Moody grinned. "His job was to make sure you were safe, nothing else. I didn't pay him to be friendly with you. Besides, I wanted him vigilant and not distracted by your fine ass."
Knowing that Moody had had someone following me around to make sure that I was safe warmed me. It also revealed that he cared enough about me that he took measures to keep me protected when he was away. The angst that I'd felt earlier about not hearing from him was suddenly gone, wafting away like dandelion seeds in the wind, leaving me with a feeling of calmness, and a clear head about what our future could be.
I smiled up at him. "We're going to have to work on your communication skills," I teased. "For the next time you disappear on a job." I was so relieved that he’d come back that nothing else mattered at the moment.
His answering grin did something sexy to his face. "Later." Well, that was something. At least he recognized that he had a problem. "You know what I like about you, babe? I like your fire and your passion, the fact that you get riled up for the important stuff, and fight for what you want." His hand smoothed my wild hair behind my ear. "I like that you gather information, work shit out, and then react accordingly."
Clearly he'd forgotten about my meltdown at Denny's. I gave him a smirk. "I thought you liked my boobs and ass."
His wolfish grin and the slow shaking of his head held me mesmerized. "No, babe. I love your tits and ass."
I laughed. "That's more like the Moody I know. And don't think I'm letting you off the hook for disappearing for three weeks. I'm still mad at you for that. You could have at least called me. I went through three weeks of emotional hell, not knowing where we stood, or if I'd ever see you again." I k
new I was ranting, but I couldn't seem to stop the word vomit once it started. "I'm not a mind reader, you know. And I didn't—" I caught my breath when Moody grabbed a handful of hair and pulled my head back, capturing my gaze with his. He looked positively feral. "What?" I licked my bottom lip. His eyes went there, turning into glittering shards of smoldering coal.
"You can finish chewing me out later, babe. Right now I have something more important to take care of."
The husky rasp of his words sent a shiver of awareness over me. I could feel the zap of electrical energy growing between us. The arousal on Moody's face revealed exactly what he was feeling. Suddenly I was right there with him, dismissing the mild irritation that I'd felt over his untimely interruption of my rant.
I wasn't sure what he had in mind, but I knew what I wanted more than anything right then. "It had better involve kissing me, because I can't wait another second to feel your mouth on me."
The growl that escaped Moody ended with his firm lips on mine. There was nothing soft or coaxing about his kiss. His taking of my mouth was all about possession and rough need, invoking an intense desire between us that demanded submission and satisfaction all at the same time. He claimed and conquered everything that was me in that single action, my mouth and body, my senses, and my soul.
I submitted eagerly, relaying the silent message through the joining of our mouths and the arching of my body into his as we moved against each other with a ravenous need. Moody's hands traveled over my clothes before he moved beneath my tee with an impatient growl. The feel of his rough hands on my bare skin as they moved up to my breasts drew a long moan of pleasure from me. I arched into his caress, glad that I wasn't wearing a bra when his hands curled around my flesh.
After a minute of grinding our mouths together, his tongue urged my mouth to open to his. Our tongues danced and explored, almost dueling, and my taste buds immediately burst with the tantalizing taste of his smoky heat, and the hint of coffee he must have had before coming to my place. I curled my arms around his powerful neck, letting my hands glide up through his hair, before giving it a sharp tug. He grunted. I grinned against his mouth. I knew the sure fire way to get what I wanted was to cause Moody pain.
Furious (Nomad Outlaws Trilogy Book 3) Page 28
