by T Gephart
“Will do.” I waved goodbye before sprinting back to the emergency room.
“Hey,” the relief flooded me when I pulled back the curtain and saw she was back in the bed, “was beginning to think you ran away with the X-ray tech. And yeah, I wouldn’t put it past you to try and make me jealous.”
I could barely contain my grin, willing to put up with anything she wanted to dish out if it meant she was okay.
Her hand reached out, clasping mine. “He’s not my type,” she wheezed out. “Looks like a nice guy but probably has like ten bodies buried in his backyard. I won’t even consider dating someone who doesn’t commit to proper disposal.”
I laughed, because if there were any doubts at all she was going to be fine, they were firmly put to bed. That was exactly the kind of response I’d expected if she hadn’t been pulled out of a burning building unconscious, so hearing it gave me more assurances than any doctor ever would. “That’s what I love about you, Ricci. More integrity than you know what to do with.”
It was supposed to be flippant, the kind of thing we said to each other when we were being smart asses. But saying those words didn’t feel like a joke, and I didn’t want her to think they were either. “Actually,” I sat beside her, gripping her fingers tighter, “there’s a lot that I love about you.”
Her eyes got wider, like she couldn’t decide if I was baiting her or it was for real. “Tibbs—”
“Tessa, I love you.” I leaned in, kissing her. “You scared the fuck out of me, so I don’t want to waste any more time by not telling you how I feel.”
Blinking, her beautiful brown irises turned glassy. And I couldn’t tell if it had been from the smoke or what I’d said. “Justin, life-threatening experiences can make you say things you don’t mean. If you’re worried that it’s what I need to hear right now, please know I’m okay. You don’t have to rush it.”
I shook my head, swallowing back the laugh. “Would it kill you to not argue with me for one fucking second? I’m telling you I love you because that’s the way I feel. Not because of a life-threatening experience or to fill some quota. I LOVE YOU. Love. You. And I don’t care if you’re ready to hear it or not, I’m still going to say it.”
“I love you too.” The words hitched on a sob, her hand reaching up to brush my cheek. “So much.”
Man, I hadn’t known how much I’d wanted to hear those words, convinced that if she didn’t say them back, I’d be fine. And I would’ve been. But knowing she loved me too made me feel like I had superpowers, my heart feeling like it was going to bust through my ribs.
“Good, but I want it on record I said it first.” I pointed out, not willing to let her go yet.
She rolled her eyes, her voice still hoarse as she spoke. “It’s not a competition, Tibbs.”
“C’mon, Ricci, everything with you is a competition.” I lowered my lips to hers doing my best to not crowd her but needing to kiss her.
“Guys, this is a public place.” Miller walked in, shielding his eyes. “You couldn’t wait until you got out of here? There are kids out there.”
I’d almost forgotten Miller was still around, his phone call having taken him longer than I’d expected. Between the visit from the chief and my newly confessed feelings, I’d barely cared if he even came back.
“Relax, Miller. The kids can’t see anything unless you open the curtain.” I chuckled, settling back into the chair beside Tessa. “And even if they did, one look at my turnouts and mention of an engine, and I’ve got them eating out of the palm of my hand.”
“Firemen.” Miller yawned. “No wonder your vehicles are so large, only a truck is big enough to fit your egos.”
Tessa coughed out a laugh. “Miller, I’ve said the exact same thing. And you know I’ll always have your back, but I’m going to side with Tibbs on this one. The uniform is pretty impressive.”
Miller shook his head. “Just remember which side of the line you stand on, Ricci.”
“Wouldn’t forget it,” she looked at me and smiled, “but I can appreciate being between the lines as well.”
My head lowered, risking traumatizing kids, or Miller, or whoever else was watching, as I kissed her again. “That’s exactly where we need to be.”
Tessa
I WAS DISCHARGED the next day, still feeling like shit. I’d suffered a concussion, smoke inhalation, and some pretty impressive bruising from being tossed across a hallway while body surfing on a door. It wasn’t anything I couldn’t handle though, years of taking a beating in my dad’s gym had given me a high pain tolerance. And being grateful just to be alive was an excellent motivator to improve my mood.
And then there was Justin, the man who’d literally run into a burning building to save me, and then went all in by telling me he loved me. Honestly, saving my life was probably enough, but he had to go one step further. Talk about overkill. And I couldn’t even pretend I didn’t love it.
“I didn’t think you were the sweep you off your feet kind of girl, Ricci. All those feminists would be shaking their heads if they could see you now.” Tibbs laughed as he carried me into my apartment.
“I can walk, asshole.” I rolled my eyes. “You’re the one who insisted that you needed to carry me up the goddamn stairs.”
He didn’t let up his grip, grinning as he hugged me closer to his chest. “You’re concussed. You get dizzy or skip a step, and you’ll end up with a double concussion or broken ribs. Besides, how else am I going to prove how strong and awesome I am? Just shut up and let me alpha here.”
It was ridiculous how much I loved his smart mouth and enjoyed how cocky he was. The very two things I once loathed about him were fast becoming my favorite things. He was also beyond adorable, lowering me so carefully onto my bed that I couldn’t help but marvel at his ridiculously strong core control. I was so incredibly lucky, and I wasn’t even going to pretend I didn’t love him being with me.
“How long are you going to be off?” I asked, shuffling up the bed onto the pillow. The movement made me wince, Tibbs immediately looking concerned as he joined me on the bed.
“Well, considering it’s being classed as vacation time and not administrative leave, I can really go back whenever I want. But Mack doesn’t want me in the stationhouse until I can give him a hundred percent. And I know I can’t do that until I’m sure you’re not going to pass out on the way to the bathroom.”
“I can go stay with my parents, Tibbs. You don’t have to stay,” I offered, my parents having already hounded me at least five times to come home while I convalesced.
“Please, you think I’m doing this for you?” he scoffed, screwing his face into fake horror. “We both know I’m not that good. Nope, this is all for appearances, so when The Times wants to interview me for my heroic efforts, I have something else to add to their piece. I come up a little short in the bleeding heart bullshit, so you’re just going to have to grin and bear it while I improve my image. Jesus, stop being so selfish.”
It hurt to laugh, my hand wrapping around my sides while I tried to stop the chuckle. I was glad he was with me, preferring my own apartment than my childhood bedroom, and my amazing boyfriend rather than my wonderful—but probably overanxious—parents. You’d think the military would have desensitized them, but apparently when your kid got hurt, it didn’t matter.
“I’ll do my best, Tibbs. But fair warning, you’re going to end up my sex slave. And I don’t want to hear any complaints from you when you’re rocking Stockholm Syndrome and can’t function without me.”
He kicked off his shoes, nuzzling closer. “Ricci, I already can’t function without you, and being your sex slave would be an honor and a privilege. Just don’t use regulation cuffs.” He winked. “A pervert I know told me they hurt, and I want to keep myself looking pretty.”
I just couldn’t with him.
Could.
Not.
Every single time I thought he couldn’t get any sweeter, funnier, or sexier, he pushed the boundary a little
further, making me fall even more in love with him.
Next time I saw Maxine I was going to hug her and thank her for breaking Grayson’s heart. If it hadn’t been for that horrible bitch’s inability to be faithful, I might never have been at the club that night and seen Justin. And for as much as I’d originally hated it, I had become so incredibly thankful.
“Hold me,” I asked, not caring if it made me sound needy and weak. I didn’t have to pretend with Justin, he knew exactly who I was, and wouldn’t think less of my vulnerability.
“Anything you want, baby.” He wrapped his arms around me without question. “I’ll hold you for as long as you want.”
Justin and I had been playing house for about a week. My parents had checked in a few times but knew better than to hover. It wasn’t the first time I’d had a concussion so I knew the drill, and they only had themselves to blame for me being so fiercely independent. Emilia was no different, and as much as I knew they were pleased they’d raised two strong—both mentally and physically—daughters, they were glad I’d let Tibbs be around.
I was less dizzy, and my vision was getting better, and my bruising was starting to clear as well. It had also been a week since Tibbs had touched me sexually. Every single time we got a little heated with kissing or it looked like we were getting too close to crossing the line, he’d pull back. And while I knew why he was doing it, loving how considerate he was being, it was driving me slightly crazy.
My boyfriend was insanely hot.
Ridiculously sexy.
And while my head and body had undergone some trauma, my hormones hadn’t.
I wanted to touch him, to feel him, and to have him touch me. And my god, could I use an orgasm, the desperation for release making me irritable. There wasn’t any medical reason why we couldn’t have sex, so if my body wanted it, I couldn’t understand why he was turning me down.
“Are you no longer attracted to me?” I asked casually over lunch, fairly positive it wasn’t the right way to bring up the conversation but needing to know either way.
Tibbs coughed, grabbing a glass of water as he tried to swallow the mouthful of food he’d been chewing. “Jesus, Ricci, did you OD on the pain meds? What kind of question is that?”
I dropped my fork, no longer interested in the chicken salad I’d been eating. “I just want to know if maybe you’re not as turned on as you used to be since you’ve seen me using the bathroom. I know that sometimes happens.”
Intellectually, I knew that wasn’t the reason. I’d felt his hard-on against me whenever we got too close in bed, then heard him quietly go jerk off in the bathroom when he thought I was asleep. I wasn’t even upset that he did it, part of me turned on he needed the release too, loving the sounds he made as he got himself off. I wanted to watch, to be part of it, wanting nothing more than to open the door and take his cock in my hand and help him finish.
But I also didn’t want to hear he was scared of hurting me, almost believing it was easier to accept he’d become less attracted to me than think I was no longer strong.
“It happens sometimes?” he repeated, asking me the question like he couldn’t quite believe it. “Guys see their hot girlfriends doing normal life things and they suddenly forget how sexy they are? Really? And where did you get this fascinating information from? Because I’ve been a guy my whole life and I can tell you that is bullshit.”
“It’s not bullshit,” I argued. “There’s definitely a chance some of that sex appeal disappears when all the intrigue is gone. It’s like knowing the secret behind a magic trick, it’s not as impressive if you know how it’s done.”
He held up his hand, shaking his head. “I’m not sure I agree but for the sake of the argument, let’s say it’s possible. That a guy saw you pee and suffered some kind of aneurysm, no longer finding you attractive. I’m not that guy,” he pointed to himself. “Tessa, you’re gorgeous. You could grow horns and have your skin turn into animal fur, and I’d be the sick bastard who’d be into it.”
“Then why won’t you sleep with me?” I tried not to make it sound like an accusation, not wanting for it to dissolve into an argument. I’d seen it happen too many times before, something stupid getting blown way out of proportion, and then people saying things they didn’t mean. I didn’t want that with Tibbs, not wanting for the first relationship where I honestly felt like an equal to end because of stupidity.
“It’s only been a week, baby. A concussion can take months to heal, and brain injuries are serious.” He reached for me, touching my hand. “I’m trying to be the good guy here and you know how much I suck at it.”
I shook my head, having heard his excuse about not being a “good guy” too many times. “You are so wrong. You pretend like you’re an asshole, but you’ve been faking it the whole time, Justin. I see you and the only man I’ve seen has been caring and considerate. He’s been kind and loyal. He has integrity and does the right thing even if it means risking his own life. You can pretend all you want, baby, but you are absolutely a good guy and I want you to touch me.”
I rose out of my seat and walked the short distance to his. He swallowed hard as I lowered myself onto his lap, straddling him as I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. “We don’t have to have sex, Justin, if you don’t want to. But just like the day you got in that ring with me and trusted me not to get hurt, I need you to do this. I won’t break and I will tell you if it doesn’t feel good. But I need you so badly, Justin, and more than anything, I need you to see how strong I still am.”
His mouth was on mine so fast I’d barely taken a breath, his hands wrapping around my ass in a way that wasn’t PG. “You think I don’t think you’re strong?” he moaned against my mouth, lifting me in his arms as he stood. “That’s almost as bad as you thinking I don’t find you hot anymore.”
“I just needed to know.” I breathed between kisses, the ache between my legs almost unbearable. I’d been so turned on with no release, it wasn’t going to take long before I came. “I just missed you touching me like this so much.”
“Fuck, Tessa.” My name came out in a guttural growl. “I’ve been going crazy not touching you. I think about fucking you so much it’s borderline perverted, I just don’t want to fuck this up.”
“You won’t, I promise. But please take me to bed. Because if I don’t come soon, I will probably go insane.”
He made it to my bedroom carrying me with such confident strides I’d have been impressed if I wasn’t already so turned on. But I didn’t care how we got there, willing to have crawled on my hands and knees if it meant we were going to get naked.
I’d never felt so desperate, my skin tingling as he carefully—he hadn’t totally eased off the brakes—lowered me to the bed and started pulling off his clothes. I was mesmerized, my eyes glued to his perfect body as he stripped himself bare for me while I watched. His mouth twitched into a grin hinting that he liked it, standing in front of me naked so I could get a better look.
“Your turn,” he leaned down and whispered, his hands moving to my clothes.
I didn’t even try to help, pulling him down as he wrestled first with my T-shirt and then with my jeans. He didn’t complain either, proving how talented he was peeling each item off my body despite me hindering his effort. With a flick of his wrist he removed my bra, replacing the lace with his hands and mouth as he tossed it to the floor.
“Will this convince you how attractive I still find you?” he groaned, grinding against me with his hard-on. “The minute I get these panties off you, I’m going to be in you, Tessa. So let’s make sure you’re ready before I do that.”
Just hearing him say those words made me wet, the need biting at each syllable as he breathed them out. I was just about to tell him I was ready, when his hand sunk into my underwear, my body exploding when the tips of his fingers hit my clit.
“Oh my God, oh my God,” I panted against his neck, feeling myself shake as he continued to circle. I’d never come that quick, my body feeli
ng like it had been primed for days and teetering on the edge. “Justin, that feels so good.”
“Jesus, Tessa.” He pumped a finger in me as his thumb continued to swirl. “I had no idea, baby. I’m going to give you everything, but you have to promise you’ll tell me if it gets too much.”
“I promise,” I nodded, still feeling my body twitch, “just don’t stop. Please, don’t stop.”
He pulled down my panties, yanking them down my legs roughly before returning his hand to my center. Even though he’d threatened to be in me the minute they’d come off, he was doing his best to slow himself down, teasing me before sucking on his fingers.
“Condom or not?” he asked, reaching down to his cock and giving himself a stroke. “Just tell me fast because I’m beyond making the choice.”
“No condom,” I heaved out, watching him jerk off turned me on so much I wasn’t sure I wouldn’t come again purely from that. “I want to feel you.”
His head lowered, bringing his mouth to mine as he kissed me. It was rough and intense, the gentle kisses he’d given me the last few days forgotten and replaced by desperation and heat. “Lay back for me,” he growled against my mouth, kissing me between each word as he crawled over me, spreading my legs and teasing me with the blunt head of his cock.
It was so good, the pressure building with the anticipation. “I need you, Justin.” My hands slid up his chest, touching him all over. “I need this.”
He cursed out a breath, pushing into me barely an inch as we both moaned. His dick throbbed, my hips tilting off the bed wanting more contact. “Fuuuuuucccccccck,” he gritted out, burying himself to the hilt in one swift thrust.
We didn’t move, both of us staring at each other with ragged breaths as I felt him inside of me. I was already so close to coming and my body tingled all over.