But it was done now and he was involved. She hadn’t wanted it to mean more than sex, but unfortunately, it already was more. For him at least. While she was sleeping with him, she was his to take care of and protect, even though he hadn’t wanted any more goddamned responsibilities. He couldn’t ignore it. He simply wasn’t built that way.
“Fine” he said to both brothers, already deciding that Lily wasn’t going anywhere either. “Get them in here. There’s plenty of room.”
Zane was already turning toward the door. “Wasn’t waiting for permission, Quinn, but sure.”
Rush gave the food he’d just cooked a pained look. “Make sure you eat the eggs, okay?” he said to Quinn. “That’s a good batch.”
Quinn only just managed to stop himself from rolling his eyes. “Lily will like the eggs. And so will I.”
“Oh, it’s ‘Lily’ now is it?” Rush grinned. “Can we call her Lily?”
“Absolutely fucking not.” Quinn put his empty coffee mug down and got off the barstool. “Now get the fuck out of here the pair of you.”
TEN
Talking to West was never going to be easy, Lily knew that. But she’d wanted to speak to him first before she told the rest of the team, because…well. He was going to be difficult.
So, she’d carefully put everything that had happened with Quinn in a separate compartment in her head, because that had nothing to do with talking with her team or West for that matter, and that morning had dressed for battle.
Black pencil skirt and silky, slightly see-through black blouse. Black patent heels and fire-engine red lipstick. Her hair in its usual severe chignon.
There could be no softness about her today, not after last night and definitely not when she was going to be telling them the truth about Mason.
She knew Quinn was right about telling them, but old habits were hard to break and trusting them with the truth was going to be difficult. Still, she’d told Quinn, and his response had been so understanding that she couldn’t help but think that maybe trusting people might no be so bad. Not everyone was out to hurt her, and her team least of all.
They would be pissed though, and judging from West’s granite expression as he came into her office and shut the door, so was he.
Lily gestured to the chair in front of her desk, but he ignored it, coming to stand in front of her instead, his arms folded, his grey eyes chilly.
So it was going to be like this was it? Fine. She’d kept some information from him and he was angry about it, and sure, he had every right to be. But she certainly wasn’t going to cower behind her desk and take his pissed off vibe sitting down.
‘You’re not selfish, Lily… You’re nothing like him.’
Quinn’s voice from the morning echoed in her brain, somehow reassuring. Because no, it hadn’t been all for herself. It was for Rose’s sake too, and she wouldn’t apologize for that.
Lily pushed her chair back and stood up, coming around the desk in front of him then leaning back against it, meeting his gaze squarely.
Obviously not expecting her to stand up, West’s straight blonde brows twitched and he took a couple of steps back to give her some room. But the chill in his eyes didn’t lessen.
“Yes, I know you’re pissed off,” she said at last. “And I get it. I held back information that could have impacted Rose and I’m sorry.” Because she might as well take the bull by the horns and address the issue straight up.
West’s granite expression didn’t change. “You know, Duchess, that’s not even why I’m pissed. Yeah, you should have told me there was a threat to Rose fucking immediately. But what really makes me angry? It’s that I would have expected you could trust me by now.” A cold anger glittered in his eyes. “It’s been years, Lily. Fucking years. You and Rose are important to me and the fact that you didn’t tell me about any of this…” He stopped, his mouth hardening. “What am I supposed to do with that?”
Her chest tightened, but she met his gaze, unflinching. “What can I say? I’ve been protecting myself and Rose a long time, West. And old habits die hard. I thought I could deal with it myself.”
He scowled. “Like you always do. And while I’m on the subject, I’m even more pissed that you told that fucking bastard Quinn Redmond all about the threat to Rose before you told me.”
This was always going to be tough.
Yes, it was. But hell, she’d fucked Quinn into insensibility this morning, she could handle one pissed-off former marine.
“I didn’t want to drag you into it,” she said. West opened his mouth, but she went on before he could speak. “I didn’t want to drag any of you into it. That’s got a lot to do with some of my own issues, with my dad and crap he put us through. But the fundamental issue is that it was my mess to fix, West.”
West opened his mouth again, but this time she held up a hand. “Let me finish, please.” She swallowed, took a silent breath, then looked him in the eye. “The blackmail is to do with Mason. He didn’t die in a robbery gone wrong. He appeared one night after work wanting to talk to me and wouldn’t take no for an answer. He threatened Rose, told me I’d never be rid of him. I’d brought a gun with me just in case and I threatened him. He laughed in my face. So I…shot him. He died.”
This time West didn’t say a word. Just stared at her.
“Anyway,” she went on, wanting to get this out quickly. “I got a friend of Dad’s to scrub the security camera footage. The police accepted the robbery gone wrong explanation and I thought I was done with it. And then a few months ago I started getting emails with stills from the security camera. Showing me and Mason and the gun obviously in my hand. I don’t know how and I don’t know who, but somehow they managed to get that footage and are using it to blackmail me.” She took a breath. “I could lose everything. I could go to jail. You would lose your job and so would everyone else. And Rose would lose me.”
A silence fell.
West didn’t speak and he didn’t move, and for a long moment they just stood there in the quiet.
“I’m not ashamed for protecting myself,” she went on, meeting West’s cold gray gaze squarely. “But I am for not trusting you with the truth. For not trusting anyone. It’s just…I had to protect Rose.”
West, again, said nothing. And for a second she thought he wouldn’t. Then at last he said, “You’re a fucking idiot, Duchess. You’re a fucking idiot not to trust me.”
Lily heard the worry underneath his anger. “I know. It was wrong. Quinn was removed from it all so I thought it would be easier to go to him. He already didn’t like me and I didn’t like him, which meant his opinion didn’t matter.”
Slowly West shook his head. “I get it. I mean, it’s fucked up that you think that, but I get it. Except, given the threat to Rose—”
“Yes, I know, believe me. I’m fully aware of my failure with Rose. I just really thought I could handle it on my own.” She took a breath. “It was my fault West. I just wanted to fix it.”
West stared at her a long moment and she thought he might have more to say, but he only gave a curt nod of his head. “Okay. So there’s no point rehashing it all. But in future, remember that you’re not alone. And that Rose is not just your responsibility anymore.”
A certain amount of tension went out of her, a doubt that she hadn’t realized she’d been carrying without realizing. That this had been a bridge too far and she’d lose the fragile network of friendships she’d so painstakingly built up. And they were important to her. In fact, she hadn’t understood how much until they were under threat.
“So from now on, you have to tell us everything,” West went on, his voice absolutely flat. “And I do mean everything.”
She swallowed, remembering the text she’d received the night before. She and Quinn were going to discuss that tonight after they’d spoken with everyone, but she supposed it was part of the ‘everything’ that West was talking about.
“I got a text last night,” she said. “Whoever sent it is knows that I�
�ve involved the Redmonds. And they’ve told me I have two days to pay or else they’ll start sending the footage everywhere.”
West’s expression became even more granite-like, if that was possible. “Quinn know?” he asked shortly.
A small prickle of irritation worked its way under her skin. “Why? So he can make all the decisions and rescue me?”
West’s blonde brows lowered an inch. “You know that’s not what I meant.”
With an effort, Lily pushed aside the irritation. “Fine. Yes, I told him. And we’ll figure out tonight what to do after everyone else knows.”
“Quinn came to me to ask about Mason,” West said after a moment. “But I didn’t tell him much, okay? Only that the asshole was abusive to you. Just so you know.”
Since she’d kept secrets from West, she could hardly blame him for passing on information to Quinn.
“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”
West nodded. “Does Quinn know what you did to Mason?”
There was whole world of problems in that one little question, problems she wasn’t quite ready to deal with. Including the fact that the so called relationship they were having, that was supposed to be fake and that everyone else thought was real, was actually becoming realer by the second.
So she didn’t really want West to know that she’d told Quinn the truth before she’d told him. Then again, West wouldn’t know the significance of that since he thought she and Quinn were together for real.
“Yes,” she said bluntly. “I have told him. He knows.”
West said nothing, the concern in his gaze more obvious now, and it made her heart feel a little tight at the same time as it irritated her.
“And don’t be like,” she added sternly. “What’s between Quinn and I has got nothing to do with you. I don’t know why you’ve taken against him anyway, not when he’s done nothing but help this agency when we needed it.”
There was surprise in West’s gaze and she supposed she couldn’t blame him. Her defending Quinn was a little surprising.
“Yeah, okay,” he said gruffly. “You’re right. Quinn Redmond might be an arrogant son-of-a-bitch, but he’s on the level.”
Which was tantamount to glowing praise and a ringing endorsement.
“Never thought I’d hear you say that,” Lily noted dryly.
“No. Neither did I.” He let out a breath. “You need to tell Rose about this before you tell any of the others. She knows she’s not staying with Rhys and Vivi because of renovations. She’s not stupid. And she’s gonna be pissed that you told me before her.”
That was going to be a classic understatement.
Lily steeled herself. “Better send her in now then.”
West gave a curt nod, before turning and leaving the office, the door banging shut behind him.
Lily let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding then turned and walked over to the windows, staring sightlessly out of them.
She didn’t want to tell Rose, didn’t want to have this discussion, but she couldn’t avoid it. Rose was going to be be pissed with her and, well, she had reason. Her sister wasn’t a little girl any more. Hell, she was a married woman for God’s sake.
It was time for Lily to stop protecting her. Time for Rose to see that her sister was only human after all.
The office door opened and banged shut again, and Lily could almost feel the whirlwind that was her sister’s presence.
“West said you had something to say to me,” Rose announced from behind her. “And can I just say that this had better be some kind of explanation about why I was forcefully told to stay with Rhys and Vivi, because while those two are great, West is not doing any renovations—”
“Rose,” Lily interrupted, turning around and facing her sister at last. “Sit down.”
Rose’s blonde curls were still bouncing and they almost bounced again with irritation at Lily’s tone. “Hey, Lil—”
“Please.” Lily gestured to the couch that sat in front of the windows. “And yes, it’s an explanation.”
Rose’s expression turned suspicious. But after a second she moved over to it and sat down, her eyes widening a little as Lily sat down beside her.
And then all suspicion died out of her eyes entirely until there was nothing left but concern. “Lil? What’s up?”
Lily’s throat tightened. Her sister had a protective streak too, and Lily knew that that Rose felt protective of her. That the whole business with Mason hadn’t been easy on her, either.
“Rose,” she said quietly. “I need to tell you about Mason.”
It wasn’t easy, as she’d expected, but halfway through, Rose took her hand and held it, letting her say what had to be said. And then afterward Rose kept on holding her hand and saying absolutely nothing at all and somehow that was more eloquent than any words she could have said.
“I’m sorry, Rose,” Lily said, after the silence had sat there between them a while. “This is all my fault. If I hadn’t decided to date him, if we hadn’t needed the financial help so badly, then none of this would have happened. You wouldn’t have been put in danger and—”
“And I wouldn’t have met West,” Rose interrupted. Her blue eyes were very clear, her voice level.
Lily’s throat tightened. “Look, if I hadn’t called the police that night and Dad got taken away, then you wouldn’t have—”
“And I still wouldn’t have met West,” Rose interrupted a second time.
Lily stared at her. “All of what happened to us? To you? It was really worth it just for West?”
Rose smiled and it was full of that joy that Lily remembered from after her wedding, that glowing, blinding happiness. “Yep. It was totally and utterly worth it. In fact, I wouldn’t change a thing, Lil. Not a thing.” Her forehead creased. “Well, maybe I’d change you not being so hard on yourself, but apart from that? Nope. Nothing. In fact, if I’d had a gun, I might have shot Mason myself.”
That was Rose. Fierce and protective, as she was with everything.
A sudden rush of love washed over Lily and before she knew what she was doing, she’d pulled her sister into a hug. “I’m sorry,” she murmured into Rose’s blonde curls. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. This has all blown up in my face and it’s my own stupid fault.”
Rose gave her a squeeze back. “Hey, don’t worry. I’ve got your back okay? And so has West. He’s not going to let anything happen to me or you, and I think Quinn might have something to say about that too.”
Ah yes, Quinn. That was another thing she should tell Rose. Though, there wasn’t much to tell. Only that what had been fake had become real and Rose already thought that anyway.
Besides, that wasn’t relevant to the blackmail thing and it was going to burn itself out anyway at some point. It was going to have to, because she’d meant what she’d said when she’d told Quinn not to make into something it wasn’t.
She was happy with the sex — more than happy — but there wasn’t anything more than that. There never could be.
She didn’t want to get her emotions involved, not with a man like him.
Too late…
But Lily ignored that thought. Zero involvement, that was her motto and she was sticking to it.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?” Rush hissed as he slid into the booth seat opposite Quinn, nodding toward what was happening at the bar.
Iris’s little sister, Jamie, was laughing as Zane put ice cream into a blender, Iris looking over his shoulder and offering suggestions about the milkshake he was apparently making.
“What does it look like?” Quinn said gruffly, pretending to be annoyed, but actually pleased by the laughter since it had been a long time since there had been any laughter in the bar. Certainly not little girl laughter anyway. “Zane is making Jamie a milkshake.”
“Well, okay then.” Rush frowned in Zane’s direction. “He’s putting in too much ice.”
“Where’s Ava?” Quinn asked, hoping to distract his brother bec
ause one thing was for certain, if Rush went over there and stuck his oar in, things would go downhill very rapidly.
“Oh, she’s upstairs having a nap.” Something glittered in Rush’s gaze that made Quinn think there was a reason Ava was having a nap and it wasn’t because she was tired.
Which in turn prompted thoughts of Lily and tonight, because of course she would be coming back here tonight. She’d texted him about how her meeting with her team had gone and the upshot was that not only would she be coming back to Lone Star, but she’d be bringing her everyone with her to help plan on how to deal with the blackmail issue. He hadn’t been thrilled with the idea — the Duchess crew weren’t exactly backwards at coming forwards and there might be a few issues with his authority. Which was going to be too fucking bad, because this was going to be his show. His and Lily’s.
Anyway, what was definitely going to happen was that afterward he’d take her into his room and distract her a little. Or maybe a lot, depending.
His cock hardened, liking the thought of Lily in his bed, which was a tad inappropriate when her entire team were going to be turning up any second.
Quinn shoved aside that particular thought. Shit, he needed some distraction himself. “So, did you put out any feelers?”
“Yep.”
“Any response?”
“Got what might be a lead,” Rush said slowly. “Not sure yet. The source is a little hazy on some details, but don’t worry. I’ll get them out of him.”
That was good news at least.
“You made sure to keep it on the down-low? We don’t want to frighten this asshole off.”
Rush’s smiled was smug. “Oh don’t worry your pretty little head. I know how to handle a source.”
Quinn wanted to tell him that now wasn’t the time to be a dick and to answer the fucking question. Then again, that was his control freak tendencies showing up again and he really needed to trust that his brother knew what he was doing.
You need to trust your brothers, period.
Yeah, well, he knew that.
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