A coffee cup is all but slammed in front of me by Darlene, who glowers down at me.
“Here,” she says, dropping two glasses of water too.
I try to give her my usual flirty smile, but I know it doesn’t reach its full potential.
“Oh, do you feel like shit because you messed with our girl’s heart?” Darlene scoffs. “Good.”
“How do you know about that?”
“Because I make it my business to know things about my favorite customers. Besides, River and Dean have been down here no less than ten times in the last week to stock up on pie and cookies. I know heartbreak snacks when I see them.”
She’s staying with River and Dean. It didn’t cross my mind that she would be anywhere other than the apartment, but it makes sense she’d go to her brother’s.
“Have you seen her?” I ask.
Darlene shakes her head. “No, which is likely an indication she’s really messed up. So whatever you did, you better fix it and soon.”
I give her a solemn nod and she saunters away, muttering about what an idiot I am.
I agree. I am an idiot.
The bell over the door of The Gravy Train chimes, and I look up to find Jessa walking through.
I stand and wave at her. She makes her way over to me.
“Thank you for meeting with me.” I wave my hand toward the booth. “Please, have a seat.”
“I’m only doing this because you threatened to just show up at the office and I didn’t want to deal with the dramatics of it all.”
She slides into the booth, and I return to my seat.
“So,” she says, folding her hands together, setting them on the table, “what do you want to talk about?”
Straight to it, then.
“First, Jessa, I owe you an apology.” She quirks a brow. “What Holland and I did was way out of line and completely unprofessional, and I am sorry we disrespected you like that. I am especially sorry I disrespected you like that. You gave me a chance when nobody else would, and I pretty much shit on it.”
Her lips fall into a flat line in a kind of half-frown, half-smile thing. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”
“There is one part of it I can’t apologize for, and that’s falling in love with Holland.”
Jessa’s brows rise at my confession.
“I didn’t mean to. It wasn’t planned. What happened between us did not begin at work. It began four years ago. Hell, if I’m being honest, it began in high school. This is something I can see now. This thing…it’s been simmering between us for a long time, and for a long time we denied ourselves until we couldn’t anymore. But I want you to know that what we did wasn’t intentional, and it wasn’t malicious. It just was.”
“I…wow. Sutton—”
“I’m not finished. I need you to know none of this was Holland’s fault. I was the one who pursued her. I’m the one who basically cornered her into being roommates. I’m the one who initiated our cat-and-mouse game, and I’m the one who kissed her first. Sure, by the end of it, she was a willing participant. But if I wasn’t…if I hadn’t made the first move, none of this would have happened. And that’s why I asked you here today.” I lick my dry lips. “Holland doesn’t deserve to be fired. Yeah, she broke a rule, but I think we both know her talents and abilities far outweigh the bad. She is amazing at her job, and she is going to make your company a lot of money. She’s smart, passionate, and capable, and she deserves that project manager position way more than I ever did. I really hope you can take all of the incredible qualities about her into consideration and offer her the job back, because she loves what she does, and I know she has to be miserable without it.”
Jessa is quiet for several moments, then she takes a sip of her water and finally speaks.
“Honestly, when you asked me to meet you, I figured you would be begging for your job back. But I’m surprised you’re not here for yourself at all. You’re right, Holland is an incredible employee and she was making amazing strides in her time with Spectrum Marketing. But…” She inhales a sharp breath, and I know what’s next.
I hold up my hand, stopping her. “Please, just think about it. You once told me you didn’t want me to make any rash decisions, anything I wasn’t ready for. I figured since you once gave me your personal opinion, I’d return the favor. Only this time I am using it to sway your thoughts.”
Her lips twitch. “I understand. And I will think about it.”
I exhale the breath I feel like I’ve been holding for the last week. “Thank you. I appreciate it.”
“I actually need to get back,” she says, gathering her purse. “I have a meeting soon.”
I stand along with her, and she holds her hand out and meets my eye.
“I am sorry that our professional relationship had to come to an end, but I thank you for bringing your Barnes magic to the team while it lasted. Best of luck with everything, Sutton.”
I give her a smile, and she turns on her heel and leaves.
I run a hand through my hair, sighing and silently praying it works.
Needing the caffeine after the intense conversation, I down the rest of my coffee and toss a ten on the table for Darlene, then make my way outside.
I’m surprised to find Dean leaning against my car.
His arms are crossed over his chest, and with the glare he’s sporting, I’d say he’s pissed.
I lift my chin and stuff my hands in my pockets.
“Hey,” I say, taking up a post next to him.
We don’t say anything for several minutes. It’s tense and awkward and I hate every moment of it.
Then finally, Dean sighs.
“Word on the street is you broke my sister’s heart.”
I swallow thickly, nodding. “I did.”
“You gonna fix it?”
Another nod. “I’m going to give it hell.”
“Good,” he says. “You fucking better.”
19
Holland
“Wait—that’s how they end the season? He just gets shot?”
“Yep. We have to wait for the next season to find out what happens.”
“And when is the next season out again?”
“Not until next year.”
“Next year?!” he exclaims. “We have to wait a whole fucking year?”
“Sucks, huh?”
“So much. And I hate that one chick. I bet he isn’t even the baby daddy.”
“That’s where my money’s at too.”
“Can’t believe we gotta wait to find out.” Dean reaches his hand into the popcorn bowl and shoves a handful of it into his mouth. “This is bullshit,” he says around the snack.
I laugh. “Agreed.”
“So what are we watching next?”
“I don’t know, but whatever it is, I hope it has way more action, maybe some blood and guts and a big, strapping man with a lot of shirtless scenes.”
“So something with Henry Cavill?”
“Oh! What a great idea!”
Dean shakes his head and grabs the remote, flipping through the streaming service to find something to watch.
And then that awkwardness that’s been lingering falls around us again.
“So,” he says quietly, still scrolling, “how are you holding up?”
“I’m…here.”
“Have you heard from him at all?”
I don’t tell him about the text Sutton sent me.
I’m sorry.
That’s all it said.
Before, those two words held so much weight to them.
Now? Now I know they were a lie.
“Not yet.”
“And if you were to hear from him? Would you talk to him?”
“Well, yeah. Eventually. I mean, we do share a lease together. We’ll have to talk at some point. I can’t avoid him forever.”
“Well, it won’t be because I’m kicking you out. You know you’re welcome to stay here as long as you’d like.”
It’s kind of funny
when I sit here and think about it, how I’ve been staying on Dean’s couch for two weeks now. How I’m jobless. Heartbroken.
Back exactly where I began.
“I know, and I appreciate it.”
“Even if your cat does hate me.” He reaches over to pet Artemis, but she shrinks away from him, her eyes narrowed.
I run my hand over her to calm her.
It’s funny; Artemis isn’t fond of any man who tries to touch her except Sutton.
I try not to read too much into that.
“All cats hate you.”
“Not true. Morris loves me…most days. But sometimes I do think he’s planning to murder me in my sleep.”
“I promise to come to your funeral.”
“Here lies Dean Evans, amazing boyfriend, lover, and turtle dad.”
I wrinkle my nose. “I am not putting ‘amazing lover’ on your headstone. I was thinking more along the lines of ‘Dean Evans: Thank God we never have to endure his shitty taste in music again.’”
“Bob Seger is a classic. A classic!”
“Keep telling yourself that.”
“I will.” He beams. “Any luck on the job hunt this morning?”
“I put in some applications. I think one place might call me for an interview. They seemed pretty desperate for some help, and I met all their requirements.”
“Well, that’s good. At least you have something going for you.”
“Yeah, real great.”
I was more upset about losing Sutton than I was my job. In fact, losing my job didn’t even hit me until days later. It was like all my tears were reserved for him. After that shock wore off, the gravity of the situation set in. Now I’m depressed about losing him and the job I loved.
“So aside from wallowing in your self-pity, any plans for this weekend?”
“It’s a miracle you got River to date you, you know.”
“Oh, I’m aware.”
“Bingo,” I say to answer his question. “I’m supposed to go to bingo with Sutton’s aunt tomorrow.”
Dean’s brows shoot up. “Bingo? Dude, I fucking love bingo. Can I go?”
I shake my head. “You are such an old man sometimes.”
He sighs. “It’s working with kids, man. They age you fast.”
“It’s still so hard for me to see you as a teacher. Can’t believe you’re teaching our youth.”
“I can’t believe it either some days.”
“It’s just so weird. You were always supposed to be the one to take over Dad’s business.”
“Yeah, but you were always better suited for the job.”
“Yeah.”
“I haven’t said anything, but I am proud of you for not running back to Dad when shit blew up at your job. I know it would have been easier, but I’m proud of you for sticking to your guns.”
I won’t lie, it took a lot of time and effort to convince myself to not call my father and beg for my job back.
But I couldn’t go through with it. Even though right now it looks like I’m back where I began, I’ve come too far to go back to my father’s company.
It might take a while, but I’ll find something eventually.
“Thanks, Dean.”
“Of course.” He winks, then slaps his thighs and pushes off of the couch. “All right. Enough sentimental crap. We should get out of the house. I start school soon and won’t have much free time. Let’s go do something.”
“Like what?”
“Anything.” He pulls at me, earning a hiss from Artemis. “We can go egg Sutton’s car if you want.”
“Dean!”
“What?” He shrugs. “Not like he doesn’t deserve it. Asshole broke my little sister’s fucking heart,” he mutters.
I love when he gets all big-brotherly.
“We can’t egg Sutton’s car.”
“Why not?”
“Because it could damage it and that’s illegal. Besides, I thought you were the older sibling—I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to encourage your little sister to do illegal things.”
“Excuse me, but you had no problem when I was encouraging you to try pot for the first time.”
“That’s different. It’s legal now. Also, that was like ten years ago. I was still a teenager—of course I’m going to smoke pot.”
“But we can do something else that won’t destroy any property but will annoy him.”
“Like?”
He grins. “Water guns.”
It was immature and ridiculous, but Dean and I had way too much fun waiting around for Sutton so we could pelt him with water guns.
Turned out, we didn’t have to wait long.
After half an hour of squirting unsuspecting people from Dean’s window, we saw Sutton come strolling down the street.
For a moment, I felt bad for hitting him with water. He looked rough. His jaw was lined with multiple days’ worth of stubble, and his clothes looked like they’d been slept in.
But then I remembered all the hurt he caused me, and I sought my revenge.
Afterward, I cried for an hour straight.
Dean had no idea what to do and called in reinforcements.
“Another?” River tilts the bottle of whiskey my way.
We’re all crowded onto her bed with enough alcohol to make me sick for days and all the good comfort foods. Artemis and River’s cat, Morris, are curled up together at the foot of the bed.
“No way. I think five shots is my limit. My stomach is already turning.”
“Here.” Caroline shoves food my way. “Have some pizza.”
“Then more liquor.” Maya winks.
“Is this what you ladies did when you had your hearts broken? Drink and eat until you were going to burst?”
“I ate pie and drank whiskey in my bathtub,” River says with a shrug.
“I mostly wallowed,” Caroline admits.
“I had to be strong for my son, but I did spend a lot of nights crying myself to sleep.”
“Ugh! Why do men suck?”
“Hey! We can hear you, you know!” Dean yells from the living room where he, Caroline’s boyfriend, Cooper, and Maya’s boyfriend, Nolan—who also happens to be Dean’s childhood best friend—are watching baseball.
“And we’re sorry for being idiots!” Cooper adds.
“The biggest morons in the entire world!” Nolan tacks on.
River rolls her eyes. “They’re totally just trying to get laid.”
“I’m not!” Dean hollers. Then he not-so-quietly tells the guys, “Like she could even resist this dick.”
I nearly vomit.
“Seriously, so exhausting.”
“Yeah, in bed.” Caroline’s cheeks flame. “Crap. Sorry, Holland. I didn’t mean to rub it in.”
I wave my hand. “It’s fine.”
But really, it’s not.
I’m not.
I miss Sutton badly.
I miss his laugh and that ridiculously smug smirk of his.
I miss the way he’d wear his sweatpants slung low on his hips, leaving very little to the imagination.
I miss the way he’d sit comfortably with me in silence as I read my book, tracing his finger gently over the new scar on my foot as if to soothe it.
I miss how I felt when he was around.
I miss him.
“I shouldn’t call him, right?”
They all shake their heads, eyes wide.
“No way. You’re a total lightweight, and though you’re not drunk yet, it’s obvious you have some booze in you. You do not want to call him right now.”
Maya nods. “Yeah, I agree with River. You don’t want the first time you talk to him to be when you’re buzzed. The things you two need to discuss are for sober conversations only.”
“Actually, I’m just going to take this now…” River reaches for my phone just as it begins to light up.
“Oh fuck,” I mutter, looking down at the number that fills the screen.
“What? Who is it?”
>
“Is it him?”
I shake my head. “It’s my boss. Or, well, my old boss.”
“Answer it!” Caroline says excitedly. “Maybe she wants you back!”
Hope blooms in my chest, and I slide my finger across the screen before I can think too much about it.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Holland,” Jessa says. “I just wanted to chat with you for a moment. Is this a bad time?”
“No. Not at all.” I get up from the bed, moving away from their curious stares, and lock myself in the en-suite bathroom. “What’s up?”
What’s up? On a professional call? Really, Holland? Get it together!
“Sorry. I mean, what did you want to talk about?”
She laughs lightly. “Well, I wanted to let you know I spoke with Sutton—”
“You did?” It comes out a squeak. I clear my throat and try again. “Uh, sorry. You did?”
“Are you sure this isn’t a bad time?” Jessa asks again.
“No, no. I just thought I saw a…spider. Sorry.”
“Right.” Except she doesn’t sound the least bit convinced. “Anyway, I met with Sutton the other day and we had a discussion about the way things went down. He came to me asking me to give you your job back.”
He what?!
“And honestly, I’ve taken what he said into great consideration—how amazing of an employee you are, how hard you work, and how dedicated you were to the team. All things I already knew, of course, but really, after he explained how he fell in love with you before you two ever worked for Spectrum Marketing and how your relationship just happened to blossom outside of the office, that’s what made me pause and reconsider things.”
Fell in love?
Is Sutton…
Does Sutton…
“Now, I’ve given this a lot of thought over the past few days, Holland. I want you to know that.” She continues like she didn’t just completely shatter everything I thought I knew. “And while I would love to have you back here kicking some major ass, I can’t bend the rules for you.”
Tempt Thy Neighbor (Roommate Romps) Page 17
