by E. C. Land
What the fuck? She wouldn’t run. Would she? Fuck this shit. She better not fucking run. I need to get back over there before I lose her all over again. More questions keep forming in my head. Picking up my drink I down it in one gulp before slamming the glass down and heading out the door. I need to get back to Kenny. I’m an ass I need to apologize.
Getting to my bike I see my pops waiting for me, resting against his own. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him look so disappointed with me before. Not even when I took his truck out at fifteen. A couple of buddies and I decided to take it out to the lookout to have some beers. On the way back, we ended up wrecking Pops truck. That beast was a classic too. No, he was merely happy that nothing happened to any of us. Granted as punishment I was doing chores that not even the prospect had to do for months. That fucking sucked but the look in his eyes right now...
"Looks like I don’t have to knock some fucking sense into you after all.” Standing straight from where he had been leaning, he pulled me to him giving me a hug. "Go get her boy. She seems to be a fine ass woman that any man would be lucky to have. Don’t screw that shit it up. If I were you, I would lock it down tight and do it quickly. Love ya son." Pops tells me before heading inside leaving me with my thoughts.
Climbing on the back of my bike I fire her up thinking back to the day that my dad gave me this girl. My sixteenth birthday he came home with this hunk of junk and proceeded to inform me that he and I were gonna fix her up and that she would then be all mine. I had been excited, especially when I got a closer look and saw that it was a 1978 Harley Davidson FXS 1200 low rider shovelhead. It was the best damn gift that I had ever been given.
Well, other than the gift Kenny gave me- her love. Now she probably thinks I don’t want her after storming out. I’ll make sure she understands where my head was at- then and now. She will know that she isn’t at fault for anything that happened to her or for me walking out like a damn dumbass.
My talk with Kenny is long past overdue and tonight we will have it one way or another. She needs to know everything, and so do I.
Pulling into the driveway, Twister is standing next to his bike watching me as I get off mine.
He smiles grimly at me, "See you decided to come back here after all."
“Yeah. Was planning to the entire time, just needed to get some air. Man Prez, I’m sorry about all this shit. It’s my fucking fault she was hurt and ran." I say to him, taking deep breaths as my apology fumbles out. The full guilt of this situation hits me like a ton of bricks.
"What the fuck? How’s any of this shit your fault?" I don’t mistake the confusion in his voice.
"Prez, if I had told her about the club she would have been on my bike that night. Not at home where she was almost taken from me." The anguish rips me apart from the inside out. “I knew that first day I met your sister I wanted her to be mine, not just some side piece. I should have fucking told her man. I was planning on doing it that weekend, but then she was just gone.” Twister is the only other person that has ever seen my emotions show besides my Pops.
"Look Horse, we can’t change the past, but we can make sure as fuck that nothing like this ever happens again. What no one knows about my sister is she’s a runner. She always has been, even as a kid. When our dad was killed, she ran away. Granted she didn’t run far, and I always knew where she ran to. She used to have a little hideout in the woods behind the house where she would go when she felt scared. Kenny’s always felt at peace when she’s in the woods. That’s why she loves to go bow hunting more than anything. She was never some girly girl like her friends back home.” He pauses for a moment. Taking in a deep breath he continues. "What I’m trying to get at is none of that shit was your fault. It could have happened at any time. And once it did she was gonna run. That’s just the way her mind works"
"Well, she sure as fuck ain’t about to run now. Not when I just found her ass again."
"Good, since you’re here I’m going to go find someone to get my dick wet with. After that shit storm she told us I need to let off some steam. Here’s a key to get in." Twister hands me the small key for the house before climbing back on his bike. “You’re good for her Horse. No question about it. Don’t fuck this up, you hurt my sister I’ll fucking kill you. Don’t matter if you’re my brother or not. Hurt her and I’ll slit your throat.”
Nodding, I look up at my woman’s house. You can see she put in a lot of effort to make this place not just a house but a home. She takes pride in it. Like she does everything. I could see her and I making this into a home for a family. A family that I intend to have with her. I’d need to build a garage though for working on my bike.
Unlocking the door, I head inside, making sure to relock it and check the rest of the house to be on the safe side. Once I’m satisfied that everything is secure, I make my way towards my woman.
It’s time that she knows who she belongs to. I’m going to do what I should have done back then. I could kick my own ass for not making her my ol’ lady. We may have only been together for a short amount of time, but she became my everything. I won’t ever be able to get that time back, but I can make sure I never let her slip through my fingers again.
Now to prove it to her that we belong together. I’ll need to make sure she understands that she’s it for me. Always has been.
Walking into Kenny’s bedroom, she’s curled herself into a ball in the middle of the bed. She looks so damn sad in her sleep. Not wanting to wake her up, I strip off my clothes and climb in behind her, pulling her into my arms. It’s almost as if a weight is lifted off my chest holding her. As if I’ve barely been breathing for the past four years I can finally breathe again.
"I love you, sweet girl. I always have always will." I whisper in her ear holding her close to me. I know she doesn’t hear me, but it’s like her body knows I’m here. I don’t know how long I lay here beside her before I fall asleep. Holding her in my arms is the best feeling in the world and falling asleep came real easy tonight. Easier than it has in ages.
12
Kenny
Last night had to be one of the worst nights of my life. I wake up to the sun shining in through the curtains, the warmth cascading over my body. Warmer than I’ve been in a long time. I look down my side, feeling the weight of something on me, and find an arm wrapped snugly around my waist. Turning my head, I see Scotty. Why the hell would he be sleeping here? He walked out last night... Why did he come back?
He looks peaceful laying here. Almost as if he isn’t the hardened man I know he is. Not wanting to wake him and deal with the pity I’m sure is to come, I gently try to move his arm from around me, needing to get up off the bed. Before I’m able to make it out of his reach, his arm quickly grabs me, forcing me back against him.
Next thing I know, I’m flat on my back with Scotty hovering over me. I know he can see my nipples pointing through my thin t-shirt that I’m wearing. He smirks down at me like I’m the best wake up call he could ask for.
"Morning. Where ya going sweet girl?"
Oh God, the rasp of his voice is hot even when he’s just waking up. His hair is a complete mess from the bed. I just want to run my fingers through his thick brown locks as I kiss him... but then again that won’t be happening. He made that clear when he left without a word last night, looking pissed enough to go off and bloody his fists. Even if it were to happen there’s no way I would kiss him when I have morning breath. That’s just nasty and my biggest pet peeve.
After the mess last night turned out to be, I can’t help but feel myself stiffening in this moment. My body practically turning to stone. I know I’m right. Horse think’s I’m dirty and that’s the only reason he stormed out of here the way he did last night. He doesn’t want someone that’s been violated, not when he could be with someone that hasn’t been damaged like I have. The thought of their hands all over my body makes me sick whenever I think about it. No matter how much time passes, I can still feel the touch of their hands. Thinking of it right no
w is making me nauseous.
"Get off me, Horse. I need to get up, shower and then drink my coffee. Plus, you need to leave. I don’t know why you came back here or why you’re in my bed, but you need to get off me right now." I place my hands against him and push as hard as I can.
"No, sweet girl. I’m not going anywhere and you know better than to call me Horse. Next time you use my road name when we’re alone I’ll just have to punish you. I look forward to making that ass nice and red. But you’re lucky cause right now we have a lot to talk about. I was hoping to fuck you before we did that, but that can wait for until after I suppose. We have shit to get straight between us." He smirks down at me, moving his face closer to mine so that our noses touch.
"We don’t have shit to talk about and you’re sure as hell not going to be fucking me. So, you can get off me and get out of my house now!" I push my hands as hard as I can, shoving against that mouthwatering chest of his. The man has always had nice pecs but now it’s more defined. He ages like fine wine it seems. I don’t know which is hotter…his arms or his chest. He’s definitely bulked up over the years, that’s for sure.
"Sweet girl, you might not realize this shit yet but I’m not moving from this spot until we talk. Quit trying to push me cause that shit ain’t gonna work. You get me?" His brows furrow and he looks intensely into my eyes. Why does he have to have the most gorgeous eyes I’ve ever seen?
Can it, Kenny! You don’t need to be thinking about how gorgeous his eyes are.
"Fine. You want to talk? Whatever! You can do it in the kitchen where I can at least get my coffee. I’m going to need my fix if we’re gonna do this shit. If you ask me, you can shove whatever it is you need to say up your ass and get out. We really don’t have anything to talk about. Not anymore." Quickly, I turn my face away from the lure his eyes seem to have on me. If I don’t get away from him, I will cave to anything he asks of me. Like letting him fuck me to oblivion.
"Oh sweet girl, that would be where you’re wrong. As for the coffee in the kitchen, we’ll get to that later. See once we have this talk, I’m going to fuck you." He hisses out arrogantly as he runs his hands up my sides to cup the side of my neck.
I swear, if he calls me sweet girl one more time…
"Are you fucking insane right now? You aren’t gonna be doing shit except for getting a knee to the balls if you don’t get the hell away from me right this minute. Screw your damn chat. I have nothing to say to you. You said everything you had to say last night when you stormed out of here! Like you had a fucking right to be pissed Get the hell off me and get out! You left me once. You’re just going to do it again!"
That got him moving. Jerking away from me as if I’d slapped him, he goes over to where his clothes sit. I’ve been so caught up in my own head that I just now realize he’s been naked this entire time. He hops into his pants, pulling his jeans up, leaving them unbuttoned slightly. He’s been quiet as all hell when he suddenly turns, looking down at me and catching me in the act of ogling him.
“Are you fucking serious right now? You think I was pissed at you? Believe me when I say you have another thing coming if that’s the case. Sweet girl, last night my head was all over the place after you told us… You had nothing to do with why I was pissed."
The look of pure fury in his eyes scares me as he moves towards the door. Well there he goes leaving again… I did tell him to leave though. Before opening the door completely Scotty directs his look my way, pointing his finger at my chest. "Don’t you fucking move from that spot. I’m going to make your damn coffee so I can get this shit straight with you. Swear to god you fucking move I’ll tie your ass to the bed so that we can hash this shit out. If I didn’t know your pussy was worth it, I’d fucking leave now. But the memory of the way you tighten around me is burned in my brain. I know you sweet girl. I can handle whatever you dish my way. Whether you want to scream at me, hit me, throw your attitude or what have it. Just know that I’m here to stay and there’s no changing that. You’re it for me. I promise you that. Now sit there until I get back. I plan on being between those legs of yours within the hour. It’s been too damn long without feeling you.” He slams the door behind him, and I’m stuck here alone in my room with nothing but shock running through my system. I just hope he didn’t notice the lust I’m sure is visible in my eyes.
Well fucking… fuck! Did he really just say all that to me? But he walked out last night. Why does he have to do this to me? The man is completely out of his mind. Even though he knows exactly what to say to turn me on. My panties are completely drenched right now, that would be why I can’t let him do any of this. If I do, he will end up breaking my heart again. I can’t let my heart and body think for me. What would I do if he walked out that door again?
I’m rendered speechless. Ignoring his threat, I make my way to my bathroom to do my thing. I brush my teeth, shaking my head at his nerve. Who does he think he is? Talking to me like that. Seriously! Is he for real right now? I don’t think so! He isn’t getting anywhere near my body again. At least I hope I can keep that promise. When he touches me even the slightest bit I can’t seem to think straight. It’s like my body and heart go to war with my mind. My mind tells me it’s not a good idea to let him in but at the same time my heart and body know what they want.
I finish up in the bathroom and make my way back to my bed, stopping short when I see him sitting there on the edge waiting for me with his hands resting on his legs holding his head. When he hears me walk in he looks up at me. His eyes are full of anguish as if he were being tormented, something deeply rooted is haunting his mind. I wasn’t expecting to see him so distraught, I figured he would hold to his threat of tying me to the bed. I’m about to ask what’s wrong when he shakes his head to speak.
"Sweet girl, look I’m sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have walked out like I did. I should have stayed but I was so fuckin’ pissed. Not at you sweet girl, never at you. When you told us last night, the only thought running through my mind was that I could have prevented everything that happened if I had told you about me being in the club. Then you would have been with me that night instead of walking into your house to find those fucking assholes waiting for you. Don’t you see? It’s all my fucking fault that you were hurt…Everything is my fault. All of it. That you left town…left your brother… left me." I swear he looks as if he’s barely hanging on by a thread. “I’m so damn sorry, sweet girl. I wish I could take the pain that you have felt this entire time away. That I could take away every nightmare I know you’ve had.”
Not able to stand the distance between us, I move across the room to stand directly in front of him. I’m not sure if I can keep up with the charade of not wanting him. Not after the words that just came out of his mouth. Seeing the emotions swirling in the depths of his eyes is almost more than I can take.
How can he think that any of what happened to me could be his fault? I can’t seem to wrap my mind around what he just admitted. The emotions in his voice were absolutely raw.
“Scotty…it wasn’t your fault. I should have gone straight to the club when I escaped but I didn’t. I did what I always do. I ran. I was so scared, and I felt so…disgusting. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t go to my brother and tell him what happened like I should have. I didn’t know you were a part of the club but I couldn’t call you either… I was so scared that if you knew you would see how they made me feel. How filthy, dirty and nasty I was. I knew you wouldn’t want me then, so I ran. Escaping that night with nothing but the clothes on my back. I didn’t even take my heart. It’s belonged to you this entire time. But instead of doing what I should have I just kept going. I was finally able to put myself back together here in this town.” I blurt it out quicker than I can gather my thoughts, needing him to understand that he is not to blame in the slightest.
Before I can say anything else, Scotty is pulling me to him. One second I’m standing in front of him. The next I’m crashing onto the bed with him landing right on top
of me.
His mouth slams down on mine and all I can think about is how he tastes so good. I could never get enough of his kisses, even when we were together. He lifts his mouth just enough to let me catch my breath. “Sweet girl, get one thing through that pretty head of yours. I could never think you are filthy. They could never have taken something as precious as you are from me. You are the one thing in my life that I’ve always held close to my heart. I will make them pay for the pain they caused you. I promise you that. I’ve loved you since the first time I saw you. Now that I have you back I’m never letting you go. You understand me? I’m never fucking letting you go again.” His eyes watch over my face as he spills his heart out to me. My own heart feels as if it’s going to explode out of my chest. My heart and mind have always been at war, but for once they’re both on the same page.
This man will always hold my heart no matter what. Throwing caution to the wind, I can’t go without this…without him. Not anymore, I’ve done it for far too long by myself.
I nod before I whisper my reply, “Yes. I get you.” Before the words even finish passing my lips, his mouth covers mine, kissing me with so much tenderness I can feel all the love he has for me. It’s as if he’s healing me with his touch.
Wrapping my arms and legs around him, needing him to feel him closer, I deepen the kiss with everything that I have in me, wanting him to feel the love I’ve always had for him. I missed him so much and refused to go to him when I should have. I’ve kicked myself so many times over the years for never going to him when I knew he would be there for me.
